Hope you are all ok this evening.

My hubby usually works shifts (2days & 2nights) but since March he hasn’t worked the nights. His work have been really good and let him do a day based job that didn’t include weekends either.

The thing is he has started back on shifts and tonight is his first night shift, and I can’t help getting a panicking feeling!!!

I am here with my 2 kids and just feel like I don’t know how to cope anymore!!

My mum lives around the corner, but I don’t want to go running to her, as I feel I should be able to cope.

Sorry to offload, but has anyone else felt anything similar???

Take care


I think it is only natural to panic at the stage you’re at. I found the ‘getting back to normal’ bit very hard. People think because treatment etc is all over, you will want to leap back into you life as it was. But it isn’t really that simple. You probably still feel extremely vulnerable and scared you won’t be able to cope with the challenges you used to meet without even thinking. This change is a huge step in your eyes and other people perhaps just don’t realise (that was what I found anyway).

I don’t know if this is helping. All I’m saying is you sound perfectly normal and in time you will be fine but each stage takes a lot L O N G E R than everyone (including yourself) thinks it will.

I’d try to explain to hubby and mum that you are still a little uneasy and maybe he’ll phone from work and maybe she’ll come round for an hour or so.

After something like this you have to go at your own pace. And maybe it is time for things to start to get back as they were - but maybe you need to discuss it and slow it down a bit and ask for help from your nearest and dearest.

Take care - you will be fine!

Love Oasis xx

Thanks Oasis

Well I made it through the night!!!

I went to bed and watched telly until I fell asleep, and hubby did ring from work last night.

He is on nights again tonight so got it to go through again, but then we are off on holiday
so I will have him to myself again for a week or so.

My mum says I am being to hard on myself expecting too much too soon, and she has offered to
stay the night, but I feel that I should be able to cope as I always have.

It is amazing what little self confidence you have after it all.

I have been thinking about starting back to work as I work from home (desk job) but keep putting it off
as I am scared that I will bust into tears on my first call.

I am sure it is natural, but it is also frustrating too.

Thanks for your reply and take care


It’s really good you got to try the night thing before your hols or that would have been hanging over you. Now you know you can do it! It sounds like your family do understand and yes it is us who expect to much of ourselves. Just take things at your own pace. I went back to work very gradually. As I said things take longer than you expect and we to beat ourselves up over it all.

Enjoy your hols and take care.

Love Oasis xx