Hello. I am new and just seeking peace ! I was diagnosed August 8th,2014 with Stage 3 BC , after 8 rounds of AC&Taxoll I finished chemo December 2014, followed by left mastectomy then 3:4 weeks later began Radiation for 28 days and finished that in April . And now here I am done and have begun tamoxifen and so far no side effects as of yet. However I hate how I feel mentally . I am on edge I can’t relax ! I keep thinking what if it comes back. I keep doing checks and think is that a numb? a lump ? It’s going to Seriously drive me mad . If my mind is on something else , work , my son, home , and I get distracted for just a bit my mind goes
Into Negative scared paranoid mode ! I wasn’t like this . BC has truly given me a reality check and I thank God for giving me the will , faith and strength however this is harder … The after part . Like
Someone mentioned when I was having chemo
Or radiation even tho I felt horrible I knew the meds were working . And now I’m just what if ? I know the Tamoxifen is in my system but why feel like this ? It’s so mentally draining and exhausting. We all just want peace and a break … Am I over reacting ? Anyone else feel like I do ?! What works for
You !?
AJ
Hi Aideebrat78 and welcome to the BCC forums
I am sorry to read that you are feeling so worried, I am sure your fellow users here will understand just how you are feeling and will be along with support for you very soon
Please also feel free to call our helpliners for further practical and emotional support on 0808 800 6000 and lines are open 9-5 weekdays and 10-2 Saturdays and our team are here for you
You may find the BCC ‘Moving forward’ information and support helpful too, here’s the link:
breastcancercare.org.uk/category/cancer-journey/moving-forward-breast-cancer
Take care
Lucy BCC
Hi AJ
Everything you say is what most ladies feel and I can relate completely to you. You’re not mad, or paranoid…just coming to terms with what has happened to your body.
I had a double mastectomy last October with recon and thankfully I havent needed chemo or radiotherapy… i too am on Tamoxifen and apart from hot flushes I think i’m ok.
I think it is after all the surgeries are done and you don’t have that to focus on that you start to think more about it all. I know what to say to people, I know what I should be doing…but I still worry that IT will come back.
My BC nurse was going to refer me to a councellor but the appointment never came!!! Having good friends to talk to does help and reading ladies comments here does too.
I hope you manage to move on, talk to your BC nurse for advice,
Take care and keep in touch
love Erica x