Hi I have been having daily radiotherapy for 3 weeks - finishing tomorrow. Today after treatment I broke down in tears in the changing room. The emotion came from nowhere. Is this a usual occurrence so close to end of treatment when I should be happy.
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@panda_eyes I think this sounds like a perfectly normal reaction. We have so much adrenaline, pent up nerves and stress as we move through treatment. To see the finish line ahead is a huge release and all those emotions come tumbling out. I was the same on Friday when I had my PICC line out. I could feel tears pricking while I waited. I swallowed them back, but I could easily have blubbed.
I hope you’re arranging something nice as a treat to celebrate the end of this part of the ride. Our need for self-love and care is huge at these pivotal moments. I also think a pat on the back wouldn’t go amiss either. You’ve gone through something enormous, and you deserve to be congratulated on being so strong. xxx
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Thanks for your kind words and that you are also completing another milestone in the journey to recovery. It’s helpful to hear that it’s ok to have an emotional reaction nearing the last part of the treatment. I hadn’t planned anything to celebrate but I’ll give it some thought. Best wishes xx
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Hi @panda_eyes I think we focus so hard on the minutiae of treatment - when the next appointment is, preparing questions for the medics, organising real life around it all - that we don’t see the big picture. When that stops, or is about to stop, there is a sudden realisation “what the hell just happened, what on earth have I just been through?” and it is quite a shock to remember clearly that you have just been treated for cancer. If that is the end of your treatment, it can also trigger “so what now?” because you’ve been going at it at 100miles an hour and suddenly the handbrake is pulled on and you STOP. It can be bewildering. If you are going on to other forms of treatment, at some stage the recognition and relief of finishing one whole treatment stream in rads will hit and you realise that it is a milestone, an achievement, another thing crossed off the To Do list. Have a good cry, follow it up with a chocolate eclair, or a glass of wine, or nothing at all, whatever you feel like - you’re doing great.
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Yes perfectly normal!!
I felt emotional ringing the bell. After so much pushing of ourselves through treatment and stressful moments, it’s no wonder we get emotional towards the end.
Congratulations for getting through, be kind to yourself.
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Completely normal 100% I found that I had very mixed feeling and emotions on finishing treatment . I felt that I should be really happy whereas in fact I felt like I’d jumped off a cliff into the unknown. You go from having tons of hospital appointments to none although you can telephone in but it’s not the same. Get support from friends , this forum and breast cancer now specialist nurses. I also Used Maggies a lot
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Thank you so much for your reassurance. I rang the bell this morning 
and managed to hold it together until I got to the car. It’s lovely to have this forum where others understand your experiences first hand xx
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Hello panda_eyes,
Thanks for your post. It’s understandable that you broke down in tears during your penultimate radiotherapy appointment. As you can see from the replies to this post, you’re not alone in feeling this way.
It might help to know many people are surprised at the different emotions they feel and the impact their diagnosis has on their life after treatment finishes. Adapting to life after treatment can be difficult and often the need for information and support continues. Many women can feel anxious and describe losing their confidence and trust in themselves.
Talking to someone who has had a similar experience can often be helpful. Our Someone Like Me service can match you with a trained volunteer who’s had a similar experience to you. You can be in touch with your volunteer by phone or email and they can share their personal experiences to help answer your questions, offer support and listen to how you are feeling.
You may be interested in our Moving Forward resources that are for people who have had a diagnosis of primary breast cancer and have come to the end of their main hospital treatment within the last 2 years. They include our Moving Forward booklet and Moving Forward courses.
We also offer a range of other free supportive services which you may be interested in. They include face to face and online courses and events.
In addition to the services we offer, your breast care nurse, treatment team or GP will be able to refer you to local counselling services (talking therapies ) and may be able to tell you about other services in your area, such as mindfulness , relaxation, and complimentary therapies which can also help.
Do call our helpline if you would like to talk this through or have any further questions. The helpline team have time to listen, talk things through and signpost you to additional support and information if necessary. Your call will be confidential, and the number is free from UK landlines and all mobile networks.
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