Perspective needed!

Have I got breast cancer? Appointments and waiting for test results
1

Hello all,

 

I am expecting a breast clinic appointment to come through any day now, as I saw my GP on Friday and she said that I would be referred within the two-week window. Despite the fact that she said ‘I don’t expect there’s anything wrong’, and that she was only referrring me because of the national guidelines, I have immediately allowed my brain to go to The Worst Place and am now on day 5 of an ongoing anxiety attack.

 

I have had minor discomfort on the left side of my left breast, on and off, for about 10 months. It feels like a strained muscle or pinched nerve - and, hopefully, that’s all it is, because I first noticed the discomfort after a yoga class. It’s never especially painful, it’s just ‘there’ sometimes. The left breast is also slightly larger than the right, and always has been. Now, of course, I keep looking at it and wondering if it’s swollen, or if it was just always that size, because I’ve lost my sense of perspective.

 

For the last two weeks, I’ve had a stiff neck and shoulder on the left hand side, which has slightly exacerbated the breast discomfort. I suspect (hope!) it’s just a trapped nerve, as I keep getting a pinching/pulling feeling in the area. I also have some little reddish-pink marks on the underside of the left breast, which look like mini stretch marks or burst blood vessels/petechiae. They’ve been there for about 4-6 weeks and I only noticed them in the mirror, as they aren’t itchy, scaly, raised or warm.

 

I finally saw a GP last week, just to be on the safe side. She did a physical exam and found no lumps or bumps. She also said that the reddish marks are not the kind of rash normally associated with breast cancer. However, because the pain appeared to be unrelated to periods (I haven’t had a proper period since last summer, when I was fitted with an IUD), and because there was a skin change, she was obliged to refer me.

 

I know that breast pain is very common, and I also know that a lack of lumps plus my age (33) mean that cancer is hopefully an unlikely outcome, but now that it’s on my mind, every little twinge and pull makes me panic. I keep thinking about lymphoma, or IBC, which I know rarely manifests as a lump but does manifest as skin changes (although I have no other skin changes other than these little ‘stretch mark’ things).

 

My father died of prostate cancer last year, quite quickly and quite young, and so all of this is very fresh in my mind. One of his younger sisters did die of breast cancer in her 40s, but I discussed this with my dad’s oncological consultant at the time, and he didn’t think that was a sufficient family history to suggest BRCA being involved. There’s no history of breast cancer on my mother’s side of the family.

 

If someone could give me an (online) kick in the backside, that would be greatly appreciated.

2

…& breathe, Buttons!
Obviously your anxiety is heightened because of your family experience, however, as your GP says, it is right to refer to the breast clinic, where you can be properly checked out.
IBC is very rare & would be the Least likely reason for your symptoms. If you have been, it really is best to step away from any general googling as this only feeds anxiety for no good reason.
You’ve done all you need to for now & try to keep busy & distract yourself. Nothing is going to change before the appointment & letting your mind run away with it all, will only make the wait more difficult. Easier said than done though!
All should be well, it usually is.
ann x

3

Hi- I know how you are feeling! I have my appointment tomorrow. I also had one last year after finding a lump (which turned out to be a cyst) and I was so super anxious for 2 whole weeks.

 

I went to worst case scenario and was thinking non stop about having to tell my parents etc that i ahd cancer. You’d think i’d have learned from that right? Wrong. My brain has been in overdrive since I found another lump, different side and different shape, and got an appointment with my GP. He did say he didn’t think anything felt suspicious but my brain still won’t stop.

 

All I can say is you are not alone in this. I really have no proper advice I’m afraid. Just try not to panic… easier said than done of course. The 2 weeks can be slooooowwwww! 

I hope you have a great appointment with nothing to worry about.

4

Hi Buttons

not a kick in the bum but a hug. It is only natural to worry, particularly when you have had a recent bereavement due to cancer -it’s going to bring it all back big-time and all the emotions associated with that. I can’t tell you not to worry, because you are going to worry of course, but to keep perspective, there are two things to keep in mind.

  1. It probably isn’t cancer - you’d be surprised at the number of folk who come back on here after their anxious waits for their Breast Clinic appointments to tell us that it was a benign condition. All that worry for nothing and however much you worry, it won’t change the outcome for good or ill.

  2. Even if it is cancer, breast cancer is one of the “best” ones to have, according to our oncologists, and if you can’t feel any lumps it would mean it was caught at an early stage and even if not, treatment options are many and various and have come on in leaps and bounds, even in the last couple of years. Cancer really doesn’t have to be a death sentence - it is just the word that strikes terror into our hearts, whereas there are quite a few other serious conditions that I wouldn’t have swapped my breast cancer for, even when I was first diagnosed, I just felt lucky that it had been detected early. 

Try not to research too much, even on this site, and especially not general Googling as the info is often inaccurate and out of date, but try to focus on your job, or family, or anything else that takes a lot of your attention, and the wait will soon be over and you’ll be in that clinic. xx

5

Hi again. I haven’t received an appointment letter as yet. I was fairly calm today, but this evening I’ve been having a panic attack and keep thinking about IBC as a possibility.

 

Rationally speaking, I know it’s rare and it’s unlikely. My left breast feels more or less normal, not swollen or hot or itchy. The little red marks (like burst blood vessels or mini stretch marks) are there, in a patch underneath the nipple about 1 inch square, but since I first noticed them in the mirror almost 2 months ago, they haven’t spread or got worse. I have no dimpling or rippling of the skin, and the nipple itself looks completely normal. Add in the fact that the first time I felt the ‘stretchy’ discomfort was back in August… and I suppose if it was IBC it would have really started to manifest properly by now, with redness and swelling and so on.

 

But of course my lizard brain is trolling me, and making me wonder ‘well what ARE those red marks if they’re not a sign of cancer?’

 

I think that I am going to try and book a private appointment tomorrow morning, and ideally a same-day or walk-in; and then cancel the NHS one as and when it comes through. I am lucky in that (a) I live in London so there are plenty of clinics, and (b) I have some savings so I can cover the cost. I already suffer from severe anxiety, so I sort of feel that it would be worth it to get assessed ASAP.

6

Obviously, it’s up to you, Buttons & if you feel the way you, then you have to do what’s right for you, however in terms of timescales it won’t make any difference.
Do take care
ann x