Hello everyone. I’m new to this site although not to bc sadly.
I am 35; have 4 children ages 10, 8, 3 and 1.
In short : I have a ridiculous amount of bc in our family although no BRCA genes. Geneticists felt we have a faulty gene tho one not yet discovered so next Tuesday 17th September I am having a double mastectomy with immediate reconstruction of implants. I am very fortunate not to have had bc myself although have had a couple of scares.
I don’t know anyone who has had this done and wondered if there was anyone on here in a similar situation? I have met a lady younger than me that had the op via the nurses at hospital but we didn’t keep in touch. Just had a couple of non medical questions really and wanted to chat to someone “in the know” so to speak.
I didn’t think I was nervous about the op but had really strange dreams last night that I didn’t get to the hospital on time; didn’t buy any bras; my phone wouldn’t work; my friend was at her house in Southampton rather than being with me…silly things but its made me think subconsciously im very nervous. And I can see I’m rambling on which is another sign of nerves for me!!
Is there anyone on that has has this done? And I hope I’ve posted in the right place aswell!
Welcome to the Breast Cancer Care discussion forums, you’ve come to the right place for some good, honest support from the many informed users of this site.
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I have had bilateral mastecomies - albeit inbetween breast cancer diagnoses. My sister just had bilateral masetcomies, she had reconstructions with implant and using her back muscle.
It is a big step and not surprising you should be feeling nervous. But, you will come through it and be okay.
I wonderd if you feel prepared- practically and emotionally?
I don’t know if I am prepared now to be honest! Have felt very calm about the whole thing up until my dreams last night. My dreams can be a sure sign something is in fact bothering me and since this morning it’s all I’m thinking about.
Practically no I’m not ready - have some things to buy for hospital bag and need to write a list of everything ill need. Insofar as the kids are concerned I have plans as to who is looking after them; and obviously the two eldest will be at school.
One thing I’m flapping about is clothing - sounds ridiculous but I don’t own any shirts / blouses - I always wear tops. I’ve been told I need some but don’t know how many to buy? Or how it feels after surgery to lift arms (if you can)? Nightshirts?
Weird to think this time next week the operation will be “tomorrow”. Just wish my mum was here to hold my hand
I will give you the same advice I gave my sister. I wasn’t sure you wanted it, but here goes:
A front opening bra- I hesitated about this as they can be expensive but we both found this a really big help in the first few weeks when you will find it hard to lift your arms. I would buy a few and keep the tags on as you might find you won’t be able to know what will work best until after the operation, and if you have the tags, you cn return those that won’t be suitable ‘for you.’ Likewise, some front opening vests and tops, or front opening t-shirts and cardigans. Whatever you choose get some pj bottoms as then you wil feel you have some dignity when your dressings are checked.
Whatever your hospital bag has, I would include some wipes, a water spray, some dry-hair shampoo, some lip balm, some boiled sweets and chocolate, some good socks . I am sure there are other things. You may not feel much like reading at first , but music, or if you can have something on an i-pad/pod etc
I left my daughter, aged 5 a cuddly toy which she could cuddle when I was in hospital and wrote cards. My situation was such that I knew I would be in a HDU so she could not visit initially and I think this helped me to feel I was not abandoning her!
I think emotionally, there areno ‘right’ ways to cope and you just have to respect your own coping, but if at any point before or aftewards you do feel upset, be kind to yourself. Lots of treats.
It is not surprising to find yourself thinking of your mum and if you are anything like me, that is the positive in what you would not wish on anyone ie that we can do something.
Let me know if you have any specific questions, or you could look/post in the surgery section as there are plenty of ladies who have had surgery who could offer advice and support.
i am a BRCA1 carrier and am waiting for anappointment to see plastic surgeons for preventative surgery with nipple sparing and immediate reconstruction with implants.
you are obviously a bit further on in your journey than i am but would be willing to share experiences with you if you would like.
although i have a fab network of friends and even moresupportive hubby im kind of on my own as well due to not knowing anyone else who has had this done.
