I am so so sorry you have experienced this. All the replies have been really useful so won’t repeat what everyone else has said!
But just wanted to say, I recently finished 15 sessions and I hated every minute of the treatment. From the awful tattoos to the exposed position you have to be in. I had bilateral cancer so ended up having to have double the RT as well.
I feel the staff present it as an ‘easy’ option compared to chemo and I think that diminishes how hard it is.
My worst bit was the waiting room- very rarely saw any women- it was all men of a certain age who were having treatment for prostate cancer. And often the waits could be up to an hour- horrid. Felt miserable the whole time!
I am glad you are going to advocate for yourself as well- I almost always had a man in the treatment room- just didn’t have the guts to fight that.
Good luck with your treatment- I hope you are able to get the right support from the team xx
I also wear a stretchy crop top that I pull down for treatment, then they tell me over the microphone when they are done and I whip it back up before they are back in the room. Gowns aren’t an option at my treatment centre.
@arewethereyet from the length of your travel and description of the centre you go to I have wondered if we are being seen at the same place! Although luckily I have always been seen by lovely radiographers, thank goodness.
Glad you’re feeling a bit more confident about things. I know it can be hard to be a self-advocate but none of us should have to endure more misery on top of what we’re already going through.
I have just completed 20 sessions of radiotherapy. I detested every one. I felt humiliated, degraded and dehumanised. I was a carcass on a butchers block. I was given a gown but had to remove it for the treatment. I have had surgery on both breasts and radiotherapy on one of them but no option to cover myself in any way was offered and when I asked I was told “no”. I did have 2 young men on one occasion and when I asked for females was told it’s only men on this machine today. I told them I would refuse treatment in future if a man was present and despite the roll of the eyes from the man I never had a man again. When I arrived for this session he asked me “why the glum face are you not having a good day?” “No breast cancer isn’t much fun” I replied and he said not one more word. Radiotherapy
is not an “easy” option for treatment and should not be viewed that way by the staff delivering it. The emotional toll it can take should not be underestimated. Just reading this thread has brought back for me the awfulness of the four weeks I’ve just gone through. It reduced me to tears on more than one occasion and I do not cry easily. I do hope you have a better experience with the remainder of your treatment and wish you all the best. It’s clear from this thread how many women are upset and intimidated by radiotherapy and the processes and staff behaviour contribute to that.
I agree with all these comments. It started for me at CT scan set up which I found degrading. I did not feel the people in the room treated me as a fellow human being. One man did not even introduce himself.
I did give feedback afterwards and the radiotherapy department have been very supportive. I have offered to go in and speak to the staff about how it feels for the patient. I want this experience to improve for other women. I think we need to speak up and ask for more consideration to be given to our feelings and dignity.
I am having counselling to help me process what I have been through.
I’m so sorry that you and others have had these awful experiences . The fact that mine was so very much better - lovely considerate staff , gown given every day , consideration with the initial positioning and line up ( I had a rotator cuff injury ) . I was prepared for the possibility of male staff but never actually saw a single one . It just goes to prove that the places that are doing so badly can improve. Well done for standing up for yourself. Xx
I found the whole thing horrible and my oncologist came in at one point (a miserable man) and told me about an appointment I had to have after the last radiotherapy session.
I just said I woildn’t be there (I was giving a presentation at work) and I wasn’t coming back for anything.
And I didn’t ! The department was in the bowels of the earth, only accessible by a huge lift in which very ill people would be put in trolleys to give them a few sessions of radiotherapy to keep them going. Poor them and poor us. we had to change in a corridor behind a curtain that came to my knees and put our clothes in a black bin bag and await our turn sitting in a gown in a corridor where we could watch the next person changing behind the curtain…
Anyway as I lay topless under the machine refusing to return, he kept saying “write that down!” . A few weeks later I wrote to him to say how would he like to be in a room naked from the waist down with a lot of people treating you like a slab of meat.
I never saw him again as I knew I could’t waste any more time with this unthinking bunch of morons. I had also refused tattoos as it was all too Belsen for me.
They lined me up with some moles I had and drew a large cross in the middle of my chest and put clear tape over it so it stayed on for three weeks. in those days (2004) you had three weeks, 15 sessions Mon - Fri, supposedly to save you from something or other but really cos all the radiotherapists work Mon - Fri.
That was after grade 1 no lymph node cancer in 2003. Goodbye Dr Graeme Mair my horrible oncologist…never forgotten. When the cancer returned (a new kind) in 2022 i had the whole breast off so all that palaver for nothing. well maybe not!
My oncologist also accused me of not using the recommended cream as I burnt so badly but no amount of cream I put on made any difference. I reckon if you are going to burn you will, and a few weeks after you stop getting rads it will go. They don’t do randomised controlled trials of a lot of the things they do hence the results.
Honestly he was a stinker.
Seagulls
I’m appalled at how many of us feel this way yet there still seems to be a widespread ‘suck it up’ kind of attitude towards radiotherapy. I am lucky that the staff I have seen have been lovely, but if I hadn’t spoken up there would have been male staff in my appointments and it would have just been assumed this would be ok. I am definitely going to give feedback at the end of my treatment. Women should be explicitly told about the level of nudity prior to the planning appointment and they should definitely be asked if they are comfortable with male staff.
Hope today went ok @arewethereyet 
Hi Joanne and thanks for replying. I really am glad things were okay for you - it does really seem to be the luck of the draw what happens. I wore a stretch sports bra this morning and it really helped me feel better.
Thanks so much for replying and I agree about RT being sold as the “easy” option. My team seem to treat it like it’s nothing and you should just get on with it and be grateful. So I was expecting something quite different. All of it is difficult isn’t it, and I struggled with the waiting area for my planning scan as it was full of very ill patients which was pretty upsetting. So many people who have had very upsetting experiences with RT - not that I would wish that on anyone but it has really helped me to know I’m not alone and some kind of weirdo having this reaction xx
Blooming heck @bambari5457 that is absolutely appalling. Hats off to you for standing your ground. It’s not easy in that kind of environment. I am overwhelmed by how many of us have had such difficult experiences with the lack of respect and dignity during this treatment - surely hospitals must be aware of this and it wouldn’t be difficult to make changes that would improve the experience for the patient enormously. We have all been through an awful lot with our diagnoses and treatment before we get to RT and it would help so much if they realised this and treated us with respect and consideration
Hi @dogmum and thanks so much for replying. Yes I have had people (?students) in the room who haven’t even bothered to introduce themselves or talk to me. I don’t think some of them do look at us as people, we’re just another breast to radiate and they’re not bothered about the person attached. I do hope they take you up on your offer to go and talk to them - I will think hard about whether I would be strong enough to do similar as I think it could be so valuable for patients in the future. I don’t use this word lightly but I think cancer treatment is properly traumatic in many ways and it has had a huge effect on me mentally and emotionally. I hope the counselling is helpful x
Thank you so much for replying @JoanneN. That is a great point - if some places can do it, there’s no reason they all can’t. I’m definitely going to give some formal feedback at the end of my treatment and it is just such little things that could be changed to make things a whole lot better
@Seagulls that sounds absolutely horrendous. What a dreadful man and the attitude towards you was just appalling. Good for you standing up for yourself and writing to him - I bet he didn’t reply! It’s beyond belief that we are just expected to put up with this nonsense and be grateful we’re getting treatment. It is literally traumatic for many women and this just doesn’t seem to be understood by the hospital staff.
Hi @sharlou - I’m at the Rosemere if that’s in your neck of the woods? Far too many of us feeling the same way and I’m so surprised that the staff don’t even seem to be aware that these things could be an issue. Went a lot better today thank you so muchx
Well it went a lot better today. Running late even at 8.15 and then the same bloke as I had on Friday came out to collect me. My son had offered to speak to him but I felt I needed to say it myself. So I just bit the bullet straight away and said to him that I just wanted women in the room as I had found it very difficult on Friday and he was fine about it thank goodness and another woman was brought in instead. There was also another person in the room and I asked who she was I was told it was a student - “we are a teaching hospital you know”. So I asked for her not to be there too and also asked for just one person to touch me not two at once like on Friday.
I said I’d brought a towel to cover myself up and would be wearing my crop top going onto the table which she said I’d have to pull down during treatment. Then she said I could have had a gown and people brought their dressing gowns in sometimes. Which is all very well, but why did no-one tell me that ahead of the appointments?
She made some odd remarks about things being better with the changing facilities as you used to have to get changed in a separate room and walk down the corridor and now you get changed behind a screen in the room, like that made it all okay. And about prostate cancer patients being treated by female radiotherapists . . . She was also making some comments about Friday as I had “asked a lot of questions” which I thought was odd and some other comments so I think they have me down as a bloody nuisance but to be honest I don’t care.
I had to ask her twice to tell me in advance before she touches me but she got there in the end!
So it was a huge amount better than Friday and it’s in my notes that there are to be no men and no students present. I’m pleased I stuck up for myself but not pleased that it was necessary as all these things shouldn’t be an issue if they just asked people beforehand and gave proper information.
I am so very very grateful to everyone who has replied as you have made me realise I’m not alone, given me some great strategies and most importantly the confidence to be able to go in there today and stand up for what I need. A huge thank you to all of you xx
Hello @arewethereyet. BTW I love your BC name - it’s so funny! I know you’ve had some lovely replies giving you some good advice, which I’m sure will help you today. If you get this message in time, ask in person, before you leave about your series of appointments, and double check there are no men on the roster. Explain to the team why you are doing this, so that it is completely clear to all of them that you will not have a man in the room. The radiographers are jaded; they have forgotten how to behave in a human way, but you can wake them up! It is your right under the NHS Charter to ask for women-only, and it is also your right to have a gown and to expect respectful treatment. If the conditions aren’t right, stand up and tell them you are going home - even if you are already sat down under the machine. This isn’t a police state: it’s your body, and you can take it wherever you want it to be. And then make an appointment with your oncologist to explain what was going wrong during the appointments. Your oncologist should work to address the problems, and in many hospitals they are the leader of the overall team. I too found the RT debilitating and deeply upsetting, so I feel your pain. When you are vulnerable like this, it is really hard to speak up for yourself. If you find that is the case, you could brief whoever goes with you (in advance) to catch one of the team before you get taken in, and explain to them how you feel, and tell them to insist for you. The operatives are just rushing to get through a working day, but by opening up, you’ll make them behave like humans again. I found that it was only the student trainee who appreciated how upset, cold and fearful I was, probably because she was new. I walked out on my second appointment, because they couldn’t tell me why I was getting shooting pains up and down my arm after the 1st one. They didn’t - and couldn’t, legally - stop me. Hope you get there, awty. Good luck and hugs.
Hi,
I am so sorry you found the experience so traumatic and I do appreciate that we are in a vulnerable situation and having treatment by a man can increase anxiety. I received my radiotherapy at a regional unit in Leeds and the staff were lovely. The changing facilities were good. I entered the changing room from the waiting room and exited changing facility from another door into the room where your treatment occurred.
I found the room a little cool and staying still in one position for the treatment uncomfortable due to lymph node clearance but otherwise it was fine.
My perception was that there was a lot of pressure on the unit due to their work load but despite that staff were kind and considerate. I did come across one male member of staff at the planning appointment. I did feel a little uncomfortable but I just grateful to be receiving treatment.
Yes we are at the same place! I thought it sounded the same. So glad you stuck to your guns today and that it went a bit better, although not sure what the relevance of some of the comments made to you were!
Hope you are coping with the travel ok - it’s a 3 hour round trip for me and I think that is wearing me out more than the radio! X
Hi @arewethereyet
I am so sorry to hear how much of an ordeal this all was for you, and really hope that subsequent appointments are much easier in all respects. My heart goes out to you.
I also found my first appointment surprisingly really traumatic - people had talked about the actual sessions as being so easy and just lying there, with more concerns about the after effects of the treatments on the skin and the tiredness - but for me I was in such terrible discomfort in the position they wanted me to be in on that first day, (how had I not felt so terribly uncomfortable when they had lined me up a day or so beforehand?!) and they disappeared from the room for ages (as there was a bit of training going on) and I didn’t know if it was safe for me to move or what, and by the time they came back to me I was in such a mess of tears (when I finally could move!) - it was such a nightmare - and I think I’m a strong woman! Beforehand I had been thinking about how it was only ten sessions, but then I seriously questioned how I was going to be able to get through them all. Thankfully the following day went much better, and the staff were a lot more mindful about not leaving me in in an uncomfortable position any longer than necessary, and some days the position wasn’t so painful at all, and I was in and out really quickly. Of course then you start to question whether the position was actually the right position and was the right area being treated, but I guess you just have to accept whatever is is what’s already happened and that it will all be okay and there is no point worrying (so much easier said than done!)
I continued reading the thread of messsges as I suddenly realised I hadn’t seen when you actually first posted this. I am so happy to hear that your second appointment went so much better and that the staff listened to you and worked with you, and that you had had helpful suggestions from other members regarding the crop top and keeping a towel with you. As you said why the staff couldn’t have told you beforehand about the possibility of using a dressing gown - hopefully they will be more mindful in the future. I was lucky that in the hospital where I was treated you are given a hospital gown to use for the duration of your treatment - which I also though was good regarding cutting down on unnecessary daily washing of gowns…
May your other appointments continue to improve and I hope your skin reaction isn’t as bad as you fear.
You’ve got this! Big hug x
@arewethereyet So pleased it’s gone well and well done for standing up for yourself at such a vulnerable time. You are one brave person.
On a note about being cold, I’ve just remembered ( had radio last January) that Dr Liz O’Riordan had mentioned how cold she was having it, that she cut off arms from a long sleeved tshirt to wear on her arms and it helped to keep her a bit warmer. I was bilateral so was in there twice as long and I had old long socks that I cut the feet and wore on my arms. It did help.
Just thought it would be a good tip for all to know.
