Hello ladies from the U.K. from Boston, USA,
I Luv the way this website is organized and I love the U.K… Puts me in a good mood. So here I am.
Was recently diagnosed and I’m still freaking out. Not able to to categorize it or lock it in a box.
Life has been upended in an instant - going from superhealthy and superstrong to super-scared.
Avibaby
Hi Avibaby,
First of all, a warm welcome from this side of the pond, although sorry to see you here.
We’ve all been where you are now, getting diagnosed is such a shock, so feeling as you do is quite usual.
I remember well, that feeling of unreality, when you’re feeling completely well, yet being told it’s bc ?!
It does all settle down though, when the full picture is in & your treatment plan is in place.
There’s loads of support here, so do come & chat or offload whenever you need to & do look at the ‘going through treatment’ part of the forum when you start treatment.
Sending hugs
ann x
Hello Avibaby
It’s the strangest thing to feel so well and then be hit with this diagnosis - sometimes I think the very beginning, that initial appointment where we get hit with the bombshell is the worst - it leaves us reeling, we can’t work out how it could have happened to us, and up until that moment we want to believe that we are not that 1 in 10 women who gets the bad news? We don’t wish it on anyone else - we just wish it wasn’t us. Sending you hugs aplenty from London. Stay strong.
Hi Avibaby,
It’s quite ok to feel angry about it all, it’s part of what we’re going through, especially in the early days.
I think that many of us try to look for reasons, when first diagnosed, but although there are some contributing factors, especially just getting older, it can & does affect anyone from any walk of life & lifestyle.
I don’t fret about this now & see it as just one of those things. Is there anything I could have done? I don’t know & it could have happened anyway.
ann x
Hello everyone,
Thanks to those of you who chose to reply to my posts.
I’m doing OK except for a few jitters about the upcoming surgery. Not sure why I am so nervous, but I’m keeping these under control by visualizing my little brown tumor being carried away by a pair of beautiful white angel wings. Will draw this image if the jitters start taking over.
Other bad thoughts about the status of my part-time job. I totally love my job, but unfortunately it requires lifting and carrying store merchandise up to 40 pounds. I’m hoping that after two weeks at home after surgery I will be able to walk right back in and start working like nothing ever happened. I also want to continue working during rads - is any of this realistic?
Avibaby
Hi Avibaby,
It depends what surgery you have, I had a wide local excision & I think I was advised to avoid lifting for about 4 weeks, so see what your team says.
Many here have worked through rads, so that should be ok if you feel you need or want to.
ann x
Avibaby - good luck with your surgery. Wishing you all the best - hoping to goes as well as such things can for you.
I’m just a few days behind you - my surgery is on Friday 3rd. I’m terrified as I’ve never had surgery before so everything is a huge unknown and I think that’s the worst part. Our tumours are also the same size! Cancer twins - high five!
Hope you can find the right time for you to get back to work - I guess you just have to read your body and decide when you’re feeling ready. Hope your employers are understanding - is there a ‘lighter’ version of the job you could do while you’re properly recuperating? You don’t want to do yourself any damage.
I’ve got a big pile of books ready to read, a lot of shows/films uploaded to my iPad and a new knitting project ready to get started so I’m hoping that will all be enough of a distraction for both the next few days in the run up to surgery and the days afterwards as I’ll be at home alone all of the time.
Wishing you well Avibaby - let us know how you get on xx
Hi Avibaby and Quaggie,
I wish you lots of strength for the upcoming surgery. It’s great that you are having it so soon. You are very lucky. First step of the treatment will be over soon! Do you know if you are having a lumpectomy (sorry if you have already mentioned in another post!). I still have to wait until Aug. 8th for planning, hopefully, as they did two further biopsies last Monday. I do not have a date for my surgery yet. The wait is making me even more anxious. Are either of you in the London area by any chance?
Quaggie, I think I read in another of your posts that you are pretty much by yourself? Will your brother or any friend stay with you after surgery?
Wishing you both lots of strength.
Cristina
Hi again Avibaby,
Just read that you were writing from Boston, so obviously not in the London area. Hope you recover quickly after the surgery. I also would like to work as soon as possible after the surgery, although mine is a desk-based job as a freelancer (not an easy situation for our family).
All the best,
Cristina
Hi Quaggie,
Glad to hear your brother will be with you for 24 hours. Hopefully your friends will keep an eye on you, at least the first few days after surgery. Yes, i am in north London too, N8. Are you being treated at UCLH by any chance? I live with my partner and my 2 children (9 and almost 7). Still not sure how we’ll manage the day of the surgery as they are in school holidays and we don’t really have anybody close to help. All my friends and relatives are in Spain. We’ll manage somehow. The wait for the surgery date is so awful. I was diagnosed on the 10th of July, so it’s becoming really stressful. I don’t have one BC nurse, it’s a team of four or five nurses. The thing is every time we call they don’t anwer and sometimes they take a day to call back. I understand this is the best they can do, but it is not ideal from a patient’s perspective. By the way, you are having your surgery on my birthday!
All best,
Cristina
Hello there,
Just finished work and replying individually.
Quaggie, since my children only started school here in February I didn’t have a chance to get close enough to other mums to ask for them to look after my kids for a whole day. We will probably send them to a school camp for a day or I may ask a friend/relative to come from Spain. I will wait and see about the date and time of the operation. It would be nice to meet up if you are up for it. I can only do some afternoons/evenings as I work until around 3pm, sometimes later. I will send you a private message (I haven’t done it before but I think we can send private messages).
Avibaby, you are so close to having the lump out already! I wish it was me! I understand the anxiety of the operation. I had eye surgery when I was 17 and was super anxious before I went into theatre. But it was so quick! I remember the doctors/nurses saying “think of somebody you like” and I don’t think I managed to finish saying “Paul Newman” and I was asleep. Next think I know I was already out of the theatre, trying to wake and chat with an operated pal next to me. I do work from home as a contractor (freelancer) but it’s quite an intense job, my number of daily hours are the same as being in an office. Regarding asking for surgery to be moved forward, I think the system in the UK may be slightly different to the US. With the National Health Service, we have to go along with the dates they give us. I guess there is a waiting list and they have to prioritise, which I understand, but it doesn’t make me less anxious. Quite the opposite.
SimoneePim, thanks so much for your words of encouragement. I am also going to the Macmillan Cancer Centre. It’s early days for me so I can’t really fully comment on the process. I wish I already had a surgery date as the wait is really difficult to handle but as, I said above, I understand they have a system in place. Did you choose to have radiotherapy at the main hospital? I thought radio was given at Macmillan centre.
All the best,
Cristina
Yep, it happens to me as well, Quaggie.
Avibaby,
Thinking of you today. Hope the surgery goes quickly and smoothly.
Best,
Cristina
Hello Ladies of London and Beyond,
I am SO TOTALLY alive and well after surgery! Not sure what lymph nodes they took or didn’t take, but it DOES NOT hurt that much. The worst part of the experience was that I was unable to sleep that much the night before.
Just checked my doctor’s note and it says I can return to work August 13th.
So relieved that Step 1 of the BC experience is over and done with. You guys are wonderful, wouldn’t have made it emotionally without you , so keep talking it out.
Will be cheeiring you on on your surgery dates.
Time to get a little food into this tired but excited body.
Avibaby
So glad your surgery went well today Avibsby, you certainly sound perky enough ? Gives me courage for Fri.
But just make sure you don’t over do it and get plenty of rest as you need all your strength to heal properly.
Hugs. Xxx
Hi Avibaby ,
Weldone girl we all can do it , am still waiting for my date for mascetomy and reconstruction can’t wait to get dis kick out .when I have the time I will post every thing about me, I have posted before but not in details .keep strong darln we can do this*****
Quaggie-Good luck for tomorrow and for gawd sake don’t go having a cup of tea with milk, like I did before heading to the hospital!!
Xxx
Hi Girls
I’m an “oldie” in the BC sense, mastectomies 2006 and 2007 at 47, with total node clearance as pre SNB, part way through implant recon.
Avibaby - Glad your surgery went well. You’re truly a force to be reckoned with, an inspiration with your positivity dear girl. May it continue throughout whatever treatments, but don’t be afraid to tell the people on here if you have some “dips”, need a vent or moan, as it’s only natural. If we know, we can rally and boost you up again. Same goes to anyone else, this is a great place to get anything out on. I think you may get your results before week 4, usually about 2 wks over here. Stress also comes into the possible causitive factors, you mentioned adversities. I, like you was healthy, but went through a load of difficulties and a bereavement prior to, but who the hell knows !!
Quaggie - Good luck with your surgery today. Wishing you speedy healing. With regards to your sleeping queries on another thread, it’s to avoid any pulling to the sugery area. Make sure you take painkillers before you go to bed, even if it doesn’t feel sore at the time, because you can bet if you don’t, an awkward movement in the night will wake you up with an ouch.
Christina - Happy Birthday. Good people born on this day !, my dear Mum was one.
Hope you and Pepsi get your surgery dates soon.
SimoneePim - I think you may have clicked on the cancel button instead of the post one after you’d edited your last post?
Mai7 - Loved reading your story, beautifully written. Well done lady. Glad to hear you’ve fully recovered from you onslaught of treatments.
Lotsa love to everyone
Delly xxxxxxxx
Delly
Just got a date for my surgery 30th August please any info on how to get prepared ,am going for a mascetomy and reconstruction with my own tissue ,am a bit frightened but want this out Asap can’t wait.?
Hi Avibaby, just replying to your question about the race for life (I’ve been away on holiday) yes, I actually ran the whole 5k, no walking. I can’t tell you how pleased I am that my body is able to do this! Glad to hear your surgery went well. Onwards and upwards. Xx
Quaggie, best wishes for your surgery and please don’t try to do too much too soon. Give yourself time to heal before any heavy lifting. My blog has some surgery tips which you may find useful: lifeafterlola.blogspot.com
Delly, thanks for your response and I’m glad you enjoyed reading my blog. I am awaiting recon after mx and anc which should be January at the earliest as that will be a year since radiotherapy finished. Have you had your recon? How did it go?
Xxxx