Thank you smelltheroses.
Yes I do live on my own…(makes me sound like an old spinster ha ha)
Ive always owned my home and Ive never let any man come and live with me (always worried that when I got fed up with them they’d never move out).
Never thought anything like this would happen though.
Still…the few friends I have have rallied around and Im being lifted and shifted to and from hospital and staying overnight with one of them. I feel very humbled by this.
BCN called me this morning (been up most of the night worrying)…MRI and Chest X-ray don’t seem to have turned up any other nasties…so It’s off to hospital on Wednesday to get this thing out.
Love to you all xx
Hi woodlark
I’m so glad your friends are supporting you in this and that you have someone to stay with. You made me laugh when you mentioned the old spinster bit. I own my own home too and am single - so you aren’t the only one that is wary!!!
A least you have a date for your op which is step in the right direction and at least you know something is being done now which is good. Its the no-man’s land bit that I hate and am still in. Thursday at 2pm is my appointment to see my consultant to get the full skinny on it all. As I mentioned in earlier emails,last week they couldn’t find any “bad” cells so called me back and I had to have another couple of core biopsies. Needless to say, I want this lump out now regardless. I couldn’t live with the what ifs and ands etc. I just pray that we both have some positive news soon. I’m just so glad you have someone you can stay with, it does help. I have a lodger, Katie, who is young, only 26, but has lived with me since she was 17 - poor kid - i’m putting her through hell at the moment and she’s taking every bit of it. she was with me when they told me last week. How I will ever repay a friendship like that, I don’t know. And do you know something, despite me shouting sometimes at her, she’s still my friend.
Woodlark, please keep me posted as to how you’re doing - and don’t forget, pyjamas that button up at the front!! Loads of love Loopy x
Ok…another wee update girls…spoke to my doctor this morning, believe it or not she knew nothing about it (I didn’t see her at my original diagnosis it was another doctor) I live in a wee village and just about everyone knows everyone. She seemed genuinely concerned, it was so refreshing to talk to someone who knows me and was surprised that I hadn’t put an appointment on to speak to her. She was very reassuring. And has given me only a couple of weeks to get back to work (this is very good news to me).
If all goes well…I intend to change things in my life.
I work 7 days…4 days as an antique restorer (my own wee business) and three days in a superstore. I don’t go out and socialise, I don’t have a man in my life, (I don’t have time to meet one), I don’t bother with clothes…Im usually in tatty jeans wellies and fleeces. And my work dungarees.
The only girlie thing I do is put a wee bit of lippy on in the morning.
On Thursday after my diagnosis I went into Glasgow and bought a little pile of girlie clothes…a skirt (YES A SKIRT he he),
make-up…some nice tops and a pair of shorts LOL.
They are all packed for my holiday (tomorrow)and I intend to wear em all.
I don’t make a lot of money and this stint off work is going to have me on my knees for a while, but, I think Im going to cut my hours and have some “ME” time.
Just makes you realise that life is not all about money.
good luck tomorrow Loopy…when I get back I hope you can fill me in with your diagnosis. Good luck everyone I will be thinking about each and ever-one of you xxx
The fact I can sit in my little flat and communicate with all you terrific ladies has made a HUGE impact on me…whatever happens with us all we should stay connected.
Love and cyber hugs
Woodlark xxxxx
PS…trying to find front opening PJ’s was like trying to find hen’s teeth…but tesco had a nice pair £7.00. bargain 
Hi Woodlark,
Good for you girl!! Retail therapy is good! I’ve been up since 4.30 this morning - just couldn’t sleep and the sleeping pills the doc gave me seem to have stopped working as the week has gone on - because today is the day I find out exactly what’s happen and if it is 100% definite. My stomach is in knots and I can’t sit still. My dad is picking me up at 1pm today to be there in good time for the 2pm appointment. Not sure how i’m going to fill the next few hours.
By the way, button up PJs… do you have a Peacocks near you? My friend Kate, managed to get me two pairs in there for £8 each - so a complete bargain and guess what… they’re girlie too! Got a lovely white paid and bright pink pair too!
This does make us assess our lives more - all work etc… It just isn’t good. More holidays, more US time! Woodlark, have a lovely time on holiday. I should have been on a plane right now, as I type this email, but was told I couldn’t go as we have to sought this out. well that’s what he told me last week - if he has this giagnosis wrong i’m going to hit the roof - not only that, i’ll feel such a fraud too. They were so positive I had BC Monday week ago, and then when they said they where having trouble finding the cells from the core biopsy, it has put us all in doubt as to whether the BC is really there or not. In 5.5 hours I’ll know.
Take care girls and i’ll let you know what they say. Much love, Loopy xxx
Loopy - hope all goes well this afternoon…
Theresa
thank you theresa. My stomach is churning inside and i’m shaking. My poor friend Katie is here and keeps trying to ask me if i’m ok and how do I feel - and i’ve snapped back and told her i don’t want to talk about it. Feel awful for doing that but at the moment if i talk to her about it i’ll just burst into tears and lose it completely and at the moment i’m trying to hold myself together.
xx
{{{hugs}}} been there. Will be thinking of you this afternoon, I hope it all goes well and you get some concrete answers. I’m not one for talking when I’m stressed like that either - I want someone with me, but I want them to just “be” not try to talk to me.
Gennie
hi Gennie, Exactly – good to know they’re around but just don’t want to talk about it - i’m just trying to hold it together and if I speak to her i’ll just explode. Horrid thing - emotions. Last week I was 99.9% before they’d had the results of the core biopsy now they seem to have back tracked a wee bit and said they couldn’t find any cells in the core biopsy. So now, that’s made us even worse - despite the Consultant Pathologyst saying that when she re-did the biopsy again to try to get more cells, she said it still presented as a cancerous lump. Surely they couldn’t be so positive and then change their minds? That would be fantastic - but so very cruel - so I feel i’m in the middle of the sea at the moment - not knowing which way to turn or what to think. The only think I am sure of is that I want them to remove the lump - without a doubt - it has to come out - even if it is amazing news and it’s a benign lump. It would be mental torture for me to have the lump left there now. I’m fairly small busted - so I ain’t gonna notice much difference anyway! am hopeing they have the results from the calcification tests they took from my other breast - apparently it had changed since last year. Knowing my luck, the side i’m worried about (the lumpy one) will be fine and it’ll be the other side that’s the problem. Still mustn’t make assumptions at this point, I just need concrete info now. Thank you for your thinking of me - it’s so good to know there is so much support from people here. xx
well, i’ve been posting on the “waiting to get diagnosed” pages. Now it’s a little different to say the least. I’ve been to the hospital this afternoon and have been told I have a small 2cm macinous grade 2 cancer in my right breast and pre cancerous cells on the right breast. I’m going in to hospital on Tuesday morning to have lumps removed on either side and am so scared. I really thought that luck may have been on my side and I’d get away with this - but it’s not to be. I feel dreadful and numb - not sure how I feel.
xx
So sorry you’re joining the club none of us wanted to be in {{hugs}}. I was diagnosed with a 3.5cm grade 2 just before Christmas and the waiting for surgery then the results of surgery to find out the full extent of it was the worst time. Once you know exactly where you stand it gives you something to focus on and life starts to settle down again.
Keep talking here, there are lots of us who know how you feel and are at various stages along the pathway ready to listen and hold your hand along the way. You’re not alone.
Hi Loopy
I am sorry to read about your recent diagnosis, I am posting a link to our newly diagnosed resource pack which you may find helpful to read:
breastcancercare.org.uk/server/show/nav.718/changeTemplate/PublicationDisplay/publicationId/82
Hope this helps a little, the helpline is open weekdays 9-5 and Sat 9-2 on 0808 800 6000 if you feel it would help to call to speak to someone in confidence at some point.
Best wishes
Lucy
Loopy…how are you doing? Been thinking about you.
I go in tomorrow (Tuesday 30th), and I get operated on Wednesday.
Please tell us what’s been happening
Love to you all
xxxxxx and big hugs
Woodlark
Hi Woodlark,
I’ve sent you a PM! I like you am going in to hospital today (Tuesday 30th) - but my operation is being done this evening - so we will be recovering together - race you to put the first post on this forum!!!
I’m petrified - absolutel terrified - I never do things by half and have to have both breasts sorted out and all my lymph nodes are going too - great joy!
Ok, my friend is just making me toast and tea - i can eat and drink lightly until 11am this morning then i’m NIL BY MOUTH!!
I’m signing off now - and will email just as soon as I can to check up on you all.
Loads of love Louisa xx
Wishing you the very best of luck girls xxxxxxxxxx
Well that’s me home. Lump and some lymphnodes removed…and a new waiting game…the results !
Surgeon is fairly confident that I will be getting some radiotherapy but he can’t be sure.
I have been staying with my good friend Susie over the last couple of days, and I must say for a couple of woman of a ‘certain age’ we have done nothing but laugh, (Susie has a brilliant sense of humour).
I came home today and her parting shot was…“I know I shouldn’t say this under the circumstances Ive not had such a good laugh for years”. LOL!!!
Definately the best tonic.
I know Ive still got a bit to go (follow up therapy) and I presume it’s not going to be a bed of roses…but at least I know I have a wee network of good friends that keep my spirits up.
Ive been thinking about you all, and I truly hope that you are all in a good place just now. Hope you have a joyous weekend.
Lots of gentle hugs Woodlark xxxxxxx
Another wee thing I forgot to mention…the blue pee…what a fright that was.
Serves me right for not reading the pamphlet on “what to expect”
Thought I was peeing neat toilet cleaner
It’s a bit weird being home by myself…Im afraid you will have to put up with me twittering a load of rubbish until Thursday (results).
Another thing I read in the wee pamphlet is…Im not supposed to drive, lift anything, or exert myself.
I read this last night AFTER I’d driven home via Tesco’s, carried a pile of shopping bags up the stairs, I then hung up three washings and took the dog for a long walk… throwing his frisbee was a tad uncomfortable…so I gave up on that one.
Ho hum…maybe leave the rearranging of the sitting room furniture till another day…Im away to make another coffee.
Laters Woodlark xxxxxxx