Hello everyone,

I’m sorry i have not been on here since i told you all about me going to have a mammagram back November and was waiting for my results the following Thursday… Thank you, again to everyone who wrote to me with all your throughts and prays.

I feel like i have been blessed some how because i went to my GP due to a lump i had felt on my right breast, which ended up being nothing and is no longer their.

The findings from the mammogram and ultra sound and needle biogsy was postive for stage 0- 1 unsure what type it’s small area 3cm the doctor told me that i would not of been able to feel this area due to in being deep within the breast and that on a postive note it’s been found in the early stages.

I still don’t know what the lump was that i felt and why it’s no longer there, but i’m thankful that i went to my GP when i did.

I have to go into hospital on Dec 18th to have the area removed and then will have to wait for 2 weeks to find out if they got everything…

I’m feeling very lost at the moment about the whole thing, i’ve been walking around like a lost puppy not sure what to do next, I’m still going to work everyday and trying to get excited about christmas it’s my first christmas home in 20 years with my family. I was in the states 20 years and my son is still over there, He is 20 years old and i’m looking for help from you all because i have not told my son what is going on yet and i’m not sure if i should or not.

My friend things i should tell him because if anything was to happen to me it would be harder on him because he had no idea that anything was wrong. Plus he would thing why i did’nt trust him enough to tell him… It has nothing to do with trust it’s to do with him being so far away and i don’t want to upset him… What would you all do? This is very stressful, I just don’t know what to do.

I just don’t what to think about it, my family tells me i’m such a strong person and i doing really great with all this… But the truth is i’m scared and i just feel like telling everyone that , I also have a daughter who is 17 and is here with me I have told her that i have to have surgery but she does not know it’s cancer, I’m scared for her too, what do i do? I know i have to stay strong for her also, i just feel myself getting very angry inside and that is not good.

I do have a lot of support and everyone has been great. I’m i just being selfish?

After reading so many of your stories and comments i should feel very lucky that it’s only stage 0-1… So why don’t i feel lucky.

I feel embrassed that i’m writing all this, but i don’t know whatelse to do. SORRY

Thank you all for sharing your stories and comments they do help!!

Take care


Hi Trace

I am so sorry to hear you are having such a troubled time at the moment. If you want to talk to someone in confidence the team on the helpline will be only too happy to talk to you and just be a listening ear if you feel you want to share your worries and concerns. I am sure the feelings you are having are only natural but can understand your worries. BCC are here to support you so please use us if it will help. The helpline is open Monday to Friday 9am to 5pm and Saturdays 9am to 2pm. The number is free phone 0808 800 6000.

Kind regards

Breast Cancer Care

Oh Trace

Don’t feel embarassed hun - your post is exactly why this forum exists.

Of course you are scared - you are bound to be. You will be going through a whole host of emotions - which unfortunately will probably be with you al over the festive season while you await your results.

I think we all at some point feel that we have to stay strong for our family - you will see that thought echoed through a lot of the threads on here. But it’s also a time to let them share it with you. I personally feel, and it’s only my opinion - only you can decide what is best for you - that you should tell your son. Yes he’s going to worry, especially being so far away from you. But you have to reassure him that as soon as you know things, you will keep him informed. Your daughter already knows that something is happening - again I would be truthful (or as truthful as you can be until you have the full picture) - again though - you know your children and you probably have a better idea of how they will react/cope etc.

You are right that it won’t do you good to get angry (though again we’ve all done it!!) - this is where I feel that perhaps been able to share it would help? If you don’t feel able to talk to those closest to you at the moment, you could try the helplines here for help and advice. The people on there have all had experience of it too and I’m sure will be able to help you.

Please keep us posted how you get on

Margaret x


just wanted to say I,m thinking of you and sending you a big ((((((((((((HUG))))))))))))

Thank you Margaret and Hazm for your comments and support,

I finally told my son tonight Margaret about what was going on it was really hard to tell him, he was in shock and upset of course I was honest about everything and reassured him that i would let him know every step of the way even if it was a matter of e-mail, he works odd hours and with the time difference i sometimes don’t get to talk to him from one week to another.

He thanked me for letting him know what was going on, he told me that he would of been really upset with me if i would not of told him. It’s very hard to explain something that you don’t know to much about, and when it comes to your children it makes it that much harder. all i wanted to do was give him a big hug.

Anyway ladies how about you are you both doing ok? are you still in treatment or waiting for results or surgery? I hope your doing ok.

Take Care and thanks again

Trace xx

Oh I’m so glad you spoke to your son. He will of course be worried, but I do feel he would have felt awful if you’d kept him ‘out of the loop’.
I have 2 kids, one aged 21 and one aged 9 - both girls. My eldest daughter lost her father to lung cancer when she was 9 and my diagnosis came around the anniversary of his death - so was a double blow to her. I wasn’t going to tell her originally but caved in the night before my biopsy - she assured me that she would have been ‘as angry as hell’ if I hadn’t told her - hence the advice I gave you! The youngest we have talked to as best we can, she’s old enough to understand the basics - though upon hearing the word cancer, assumed mummy was going to die and got quite upset - so lots of reassurance there, Have recently had her school parents night and been assured by her teacher that she is handling in the situation in a way that ‘shows maturity beyond her years’ - so very proud of her!

To answer your question as to where we are at - I was dx on 1 Nov, had right mastectomy and full node clearance on 15th Nov, tumour was Grade 3, cancer had spread to nodes, started chemo on 28th November, have to have 4 cycles of FEC, followed by a month of radiotherapy, followed by 4 cycles of Taxotere, followed by a year of Herceptin - and only now beginning to realise the enormity of it all !! But, that said, although it seems like there is a long way to go - it’s all do-able (so the very kind ladies on here have assured me !!) - and I will get through this.

My eldest daughter is getting married in July next year - I fully intend being there (bald or not lol)

best wishes to you Trace

xx Margaret

Hello Margaret,

Wow, you have been through a lot in the past 6 weeks and seem to be very positive through it all, your children must be very proud of you. You are a strong women and i don’t even know you and i’m proud of you!!! :o)

Thank you, for all your support you have really helped me. Congradulations to your daughter, like you said bald or not you will be their and will have a great time.

I will keep you updated and please keep me updated with you. Have a lovely christmas and enjoy your family and i hope to talk to you again really soon.

Thanks again

Trace xx

Hi Trace

I will keep in touch and I’m glad I’ve been of some help. It’s really just that I have been so helped by people on here, because when all’s said & done these are people who really do understand what you’re going through - I just know how much it helps to have someone reply or comment on how you’re doing etc

Not sure strong is the right word (ask my hubby who sees me blubbering late at night lol) - but I guess you just have to get on with it…

Hope you and yours have a lovely christmas too

take care

margaret x