Hi everyone, am very new to this so please bear with me!! I am 29 and was diagnosed with DCIS in october, had a lumpectomy but when i got my histology results back it said that there was invasive grade 3 cancer present aswell 38mm tumour so had to have a mastectomy and full node clearance in november. Was absolutely devastated to say the least, i opted for the immediate reconstruction which even though it was a very long operation but am pleased i did now. My histology results for the mastectomy were optimistic, all of my lymph glands were clear and there was no more cancer found in the breast, so the results were a relief but was told would probably still need to have chemo cos of the grade and my age etc…Have just had my 1st appointment with my oncologist today and my head is spinning with all the info he’s given me. Will be starting FEC chemotherapy in the next couple of weeks so am pretty scared about it all. Have just come onto here really to test the water and see if anyones going through similar situation
Hi there Browneyedgirl,
Sorry you have had to join us.
You will find a lot of support on this website.
Chemo does frighten a lot of people but I am a lot older than you and coped really well. I had six lots and although I was glad when it was over I managed to work and keep a sense of humour.
I opted to have my chemo every Thursday. I would be fine straight after as they give you steroids to take for three days. Then I would feel incredibly tired and go to bed and sleep. Just do what your body tells you to do.
I was never sick or felt sick just didn’t fancy food. You have a funny taste in your mouth. I found good oral hygiene helped me. Tongue scraper for furry tongue and rinsed my mouth with bicarbonate of soda. I also chewed sugar free gum.
Once you have got through the first you know what happens and it becomes less frightening.
Keep posting while having your treatment as you will get a lot of support and info from the ladies.
Love and hugs,
Jugsy x
Hi, i was diagnosed in Jan 08 , i have an aggressive grade 3 breast cancer and have opted for chemo first to hopefully shrink it with a lumpectomy and radiotherapy after.
I am 41 with 2 children 6 & 11 and am off work at present, (last of my worries!!)
Due to have first chemo on 4th Feb , went for a pre chemo appoint last week which made me ralise this is really happening, i am really scared about starting the treatment. Will be having either TAC or FEC will find out on fri at hosp appoint. Have been told i will lose all my hair which i am dreading, going to sort a wig out tomorrow.
Am fed up with visiting the hospital already, got to get used to it i suppose, i think not being in control is going to be difficult to handle.
I had a sentinel node biopsy on Sat so arm is a bit sore but not too bad, in a way i just want to get the treatment started so i can can it out of the way.
Also had a holiday in March booked to Spain so upset at having to cancel that !! Will hopefully go later int he year, something to look forward to .
Take care
Sarah
Hi I was 28 when dx this time last year with invasive ductal carinoma. I had a lumpectomy, lymph nodes removed, FEC chemo x 6 and radiotherapy.
When first dx you get told so much info and everything is so alien to you, let alone the fact that you are probably in shock from the whole diagnosis. You get told different bits from different people and it gets so confusing.
My lymph nodes were clear too but like you was also told because of my age and the aggresiveness of the cancer I would have to have the works. Visiting the cnacer unit for the first time was tough. It starts to sink in then. I too was terrified. My mum had had chemo three years ago and I kind of knew what was coming. Too top it off mum was also dx with breast cancer 1 week after me, also having to have op, chemo, rads etc.
As you probably know by now most women having FEC lose ther’ye hair. Mine started to fall out 2 weeks after the first one. Be brave and get it cut short. As soon as it started to fall out I shaved it all off. I didn’t want to sit there and wait for it to fall out bit by bit, if it was going, it was on my terms. My other half was in Australia on business at the time and I was all alone but I bit the bullet, opened a bottle of Baileys and did it. It really wasn’t that bad and not one tear was shed.
I had a bit of a rough time of FEC and was very sick and knocked out for the first 10 days of each cycle but it varies with every person. Take each day as it comes. If you feel rough and have no energy then spend all day in bed. Don’t try to fight its effects, do exactly as your body tells you. Set yourself targets for the weekends when you do feel better. Organise shopping trips with your girlfriends or days out. Its something to look forward to. I went away for a couple of weekends between cycles and it did me the world of good. I also had some very good drunken nights out too in my crazy wigs (although could’nt handle quite as much alcohol). Also had a massive wig party at a local club to celebrate finishing treatment. Theres some fab pics on my FaceBook profile Mandy Newell (london).
Chemo is a horrible thing to have to go through and there was one time when I was ready to give up but unfortunately you have to do it.
I finished radiotherapy in about Sept. I’m now 5 months on and feeling fab!. I got a lovely little pixie crop and everyone comments on how cool short hair is on me. I’m going to keep it short from now on. I’m getting married in 9 weeks ( V. nervous ) but can’t wait, and i’m looking forward to two weeks in the Maldives with my new hubbie.
The end of treatment for you will seem so long away but honestly it flys by, look to the future, be brave and make the most of this fab website. It got me through the tough times.
Good Luck and I hope this has helped.
Mandy
Hi & welcome Sarah & Browneyedgirl. I am just coming to the end of treatment, diagnosed last May, chemo June-Sept, Mastecomy/lymph nodes out Nov, now having rads & finish on Fri. On Tamoxifen for next 5 years. I had 6 lots of FEC, from the 3rd one I was sick afterwards but only on the chemo day itself ( usually in the eve) Then i had a couple of sleepy days, then a coupe of pottering round days then was feeling a bit more back to myself. in the second half of the 3 weeks I managed to do a bit of running & go to the gym. I took echinacea all the way through to boost my immune system, its most effective if taken 2 weeks on, one week off, so I took it on weeks 2&3 of each cycle. Plan in some treats for the good weeks, listen to your body, dont feel guilty on the days when you want to sleep/cry/rant &rave. (we have all been there!) When peopleoffer to do things to help ( do the ironing, give you a lift etc) accept it
I was so terrifed when diagnosed, but you find this ability to cope that you do not know you have & it takes over
Look to the future & make plans!
good Luck
Mand xx
Hi there. Mandy - How wonderfully exciting that you are getting married soon, and feeling fab! Wow, what an emotional day that will be. Fantastic!
Sarah and Browneyedgirl - So sorry that you have had to join us, but really glad that you have found this web site because you will get real support and understanding here. Lots of good advice above, you might also like to look at the “undergoing treatment - chemotherapy” threads because you’ll get loads of information there and find out how others are coping. Fizbiz starting a “shopping list for chemo” which has lots of good ideas. Also you might like to look at “anyone starting chemo” which Dyzee started a few weeks ago - there you will find us chatting away to each other as we have been through our first and second chemos and beyond, and you will find that life does go on, although it feels like such an enormous hurdle. You WILL get through this - hope you will join in any of the “threads” that seem helpful. Thinking of you. Good luck, big hug. Love Sarah x
Hi,
Couple of you were born the same year as me!, i got dx with BC back in dec 07 i went through chemo first, FEC and Taxotere, surgery and then radiotherapy. Im spirits were kept high as i was adamant that i was going to fight the darn thing so i went in everytime and walked out with a smile on my face.
I used to have mine on a tuesday and by the weekend i was pretty much curled up in bed and achey sometimes feverish and very tired. As the immunes low i did get the odd infection now and then.
There will be times where you’d may not be able to do anything but once i was back on my feet i was back at work or doing normal stuff. One thing i loved doing was baking when i was off sick from work, sometimes they came out delicious others not so good!
Like the other posts say, do what your body tells you to do and dont fight it as the more rest you get the more quicker you’ll get back on your feet. You’ll be fine on the your first chemo just go in there thinking its your little miracle drug.
Good luck!
xx
Hi, thanks so much for all your comments. It really does help knowing theres people saying that there is light at the end of the tunnel… Am trying so hard to stay positive and people have commented on my attitude saying they admire my positiveness, i have a good sense of humour aswell and i think that will help me through it too… The thing i am finding most hard to cope with is the hair loss, its really gonna knock me for six when it falls out, am going to sort out a wig tomorrow as i should be starting my chemo in next couple of weeks so i wanna be prepared. Have to go for something called an echo 1st to check my heart is up to scratch. There seems to be so many negatives with this damn chemo but if it makes me well at the end of it then i cant complain. was quite shocked when onc started talking about survival rates etc…really dont think any of this has hit me at all yet, maybe it will afterwards. I have a 9 year old daughter and she seems to have coped well so far with my operations and stuff, but not quite sure how shes gonna react when im having chemo, but have been told so many different stories about chemo, some people have sailed through it and others have been really poorly. So guess its the fear of the unknown, but as people keep telling me i have youth on my side… My boyfriend i dont think really knows how to deal with it, was such a shock when i found out maybe it hasn’t hit him yet either. I am quite self consious at the minute and i havent shown him my reconstructed breast and he hasn’t asked either, everything just feels so different now its hard to ever imagine just going back to normal life, But i know it will happen… Congrats to mandy on getting married, i agree with seabird that it will be an emotional day. Hopefully it’ll be me one day. thanks again for all the posts, i will let you all know how i get on finding a wig. xx
Hi again Browneyedgirl. You are so right, everyone is different, so the best thing to do is just wait to see how you personally are and then deal with any side effects on a day by day basis. It’s frightening when you read the whole list of what “might” happen - but bear in mind that by no means does everything happen to everyone! It’s hard enough dealing with your own emotions, let alone trying to think how your daughter and boyfriend are feeling. If you can, just try to be as open and honest as possible with them. With your daughter it’s obviously a gentler version, but I am sure she will understand that you need this treatment to get fully better, but that there may be some days that you don’t feel great and need to rest and take things easy. So long as she understands that it is just a stage that will pass I am sure she will be fine - does her school know what you are going through? If she sees that you are confident that you will be OK, she will be as well! As for your boyfriend, likewise, however hard it is do try to talk with him about how you are feeling - even if that is that you are not sure how you are feeling! The most lonely thing for both of you is having emotions that you aren’t sharing. I can understand that you feel self conscious at the moment, but if you are in a loving relationship then he will be just wanting to do whatever will help you most - so often fear of the unknown is worse. You need to talk about how you are both feeling, I am sure he will be supportive and caring. The hair thing is tough as well of course, just keep reminding yourself that all these things are things that are happening to your body, but they do not define who you are. You, the woman, the mother your daughter loves, the lady your partner loves, is just the same, just as special and wonderful and precious. Never forget that! Good luck and thinking of you - and wishing you a wonderful wedding one of these days!! Sarah xx
Hi I was diagnosed Dec 05, aged 37, had emergency mastectomy with FNC, my children at the time were 8 year daughter and 6 year old son.
I was originally numb and went with the flow but when I had the path report and was advised of the full treatment plan it started to hit home in a big way. I remained quite postive or perhaps strong might be the better word to the outside world (ever since I was a child I have always done my puking in private), but inside my head/body and my own house I couldn’t stick with it 24/7 and did have to let my emotions out or I would have gone insane.
I had 4xFEC started valentines day 06, I used the cold cap and had fantastic results hair loss wise, I would feel sick pretty much imediatley after the red and the nurses would give me more anti sickness while in the chemo ward, I would get home be sick the once and at least this made me feel better and would allow me to sleep, I would have the chemo on a tuesday and feel pretty groggy until the friday when I could get up and start to function again (by this I mean basic mummy duties, breakfast and school lunches, not go back to work) week 2 was recovery and week 3 was always a good one lunching with girlfriends or family. after the FEC I went onto Tax which was different again, but will only go into that if your programme gets changed (I had high lymph node involvment).
As you say we are all different, see how it effects you, I didn’t like it, but to me it was do-able with a husband working continental shifts and 2 young kids having school runs and after school clubs, some women sail through chemo while others seem to get every niggle possible + loads more, personally would suggest not read all the threads on side effects before starting chemo I sometimes feel its a bit like when you are heavily pregnant and people offer you those horror stories, with kids you have no choice other than to just get up and get on with it then go back to bed while they are at school.
I made sure my kids teachers were in the know and they were fantastic at keeping an eye on them, however my 2 never got upset at school once or had any comment made to them and I actually carried on with my 1 hour a week class help without any kids noticing my hair or making any comment. I have always tried to be as honest as possible with my 2, my daughter asks more than son, but she is older and a girl so we have lots of trips to london to the theatre.
Take care and Good luck
Debbiex
Hi and again,
Try not to be too worried about the hair loss. You just have to think, its going to fall out and theres nothing you can do about it. Its not as bad when it actually happens as what you first think it to be. I had about 10 different wigs, some realistic ones, some crazy one but 95% of the time I just wore what I called my chemo caps. Have a look on www.headcovers.com its a company abroad but delivery is so cheap and very quick. They do some great t-shirt material head scarves, they are seamed and pre tied so you just slip it on and your ready to go
You and I are so alike. I too have a nine year old and she coped unbelievably well with everything. She had a bit of a double whammy as me and mum were both having chemo at the same time (literally 2 weeks apart) so not only did she have to watch me go through it she had to watch her nan go through it too (they are very close). She was amazing. They’re so small at that age but so tough and can take on the world if they have to.
Thank you so much for the Congrats for my wedding. Your right it is going to be the most emotional day of my life. I’m getting so nervous. Don’t think i’m going to be able to get the vows out as i’ll be crying my eyes out.
Think to the furture and i’m sure you will have your special day.
Take care, hope everything goes ok,
Mandy xxx
Hello all…
…just wanted to leave a quick post. I was diagnosed in 2005 when I was 27. Yes what a rollercoaster ride but with each year I just keep feeling better and better. I had a mastectomy, ivf, chemo, implant reconstruction and am now on zoladex and tamoxifen…I now grab life by the balls and have as much fun as possible. Chema is a scarey thing…I think it was the thing that I feared the most…the thought of losing my hair upset me more than losing a breast…I have long, black waist length hair…
…anyway the cold cap worked for me…it can be a bit touch and go but it might be worth a try…I didn’t lose any hair on my head…just all body hair
…try and keep positive…
sending you a big hug xxx
katey