Hi, I have been posting the last few days about my sister who has got bone mets. b/c 2yrs ago lymph nodes removed.
She had been in pain for 5 weeks so much so that she was immobile and the gp kept giving her pain killers and did refer her for a bone scan.but was pretty hopeless!!
She was so bad her hubby rang and managed to get a cancellation for a scan. Was in so much pain couldn’t get on the plinth for the scan. A&E for morphine to be able to do it,. and from then on all our world was shattered again. mets in her back hip and rib.
In the last few days had to wait for the bank holiday was over before anything got moving. but she has a swelling of her abdomen, breathlesssness and on oxygen , vomiting and needing a ct scan but can’t keep stuff down that she needs to take for thescan.
I am dreading the results of the scans today and feel numb also feel selfish for feeling like this as it her that its happening to.
trying to be strong for our mum.
We have lost our dad and gran in the last two years and it seems so unfair that this horrible thing may be going to take my lovely sister.
Sorry I am a little to upset to carry on typing but any thing anyone can suggest to
be a little stronger and more information about what the outcome/treatment could be. thanks Tabby x
Don’t feel selfish. It is someways harder for the people having to watch people they love suffer. You feel so helpless and so frightened at the thought of losing them. I remember this from when my husband had a bad cycling accident and when my mother died. when it happening to you, you just locked into the treatment and symptoms - it is hard to worry about anything else. Now I watch my husband go through the same thing.
Your sister must feel lucky having you their for her - use this site for support. Other friends and family post and get lots out of it. It is hard being brave for someone else you’re a star.
I really feel for you and I just don’t know what to say (makes a change for me!),
so I just wanted to send you a massive ‘cyber hug’ ((((((((((o)))))))))) and lots of love to you and your family. Keeping my fingers and toes crossed for you all,
Still not much to report as the ct scan was only done yesterday. she has been moved to a ward that will be able to do chemo and I think that they found something on /in her liver as she did say about chemo on the liver. She looked quite bad on Thursday night. but my mum saw her Friday and thought she was better.
Still vomiting and not eating much and breathless. Hope that once she starts chemo …but in 5 weeks there has been a marked decline … I am going to be positive though and the chemo will help and the other symptoms will go away.
Hi tabby - so very sorry to hear about your sister’s mets. Don’t for one minute feel selfish, you care for her, and your sorrow is a natural reaction. We are always here for you to bring your thoughts and fears to. I have found it does help to “talk” with people in the same position, even though it is only in cyberspace.
My twin brother died some 10 yrs ago of a brain tumour, and although I have bc, I can recollect with great clarity, just how devastated I was about his diagnosis. I don’t know how the brain operates, but I do know that with my own cancer, I am much more able to deal with it, than my brother’s. So please, take some solace in that your own feelings are quite natural.
Let us hope that the chemo may mitigate the cancer, but if not, I would suggest you contact some kind of hospice care, so you are aware of what is available. My brother had hospice care at home, and it was a wonderful, caring service, that so helped him and his wife.
tabby
hugs for you, and your family. i hope they soon get your sister out of pain and comfortable, watching someone in such pain is heartbreaking. take care of yourself too, it’s easy to forget to do that, but you need to be well for her.
God bless you and may peace surround you
Hi Tabby, hope your feeling a little better today, its always worse over a weekend i think, have you rang the support line on here to talk to someone? they are very good, might help you gain a little more understanding in this terrible position you and your family find yourselves in.
Just a recap on all going on plus a few queries if anyone can answer.
Sis given antisickness drug to combat vomiting that has slowed down thankfully. Although she hasn’t eaten very much if at all nothing in the two weeks shes been in.
Results yesterday found some on her skull and liver but brain and lungs clear. she had a central line put in last night . do you think they will get fluids/foodsto her now thats in?? everything seems slow but it does seem like that when its one of your family we are so used to instant stuff nowadays!
Chemo starting soon.
Its the eating that worring though as she does seem to want to eat she just cant . Tabby x
Hi Tabby, just before and during surgery i found it very hard to eat anything, my appetite just went, i still eat a lot less than i used to and its now nearly 3months since i was diagnosed, sometimes its really hard to eat, but harder for your loved ones to see you not eating, i think its all part and parcel of this illness., if it carried on then i would have had my onc check me over, but i eat enough to keep me healthy and going, hope this helps a little, and thats good news for your sister, give her a big hug off me
I am in a similar position to you. My sister was diagnosed 5 years ago (age 29) with breast cancer and we lost our mum and aunt (age 50 and 41) to breast/ovarian cancer some years ago. Two years after initial diagnosis, my sister was diagnosed with extensive bone mets which was kept under control for two years following radiation treatment and bone stenthening injections (can’t remember the name now).
However, recently in May, she was diagnosed with mets to the fluid in the brain and skull - she suffered debilitating symptoms such as dizziness, pain and nausea, finally being admitted to hospital for symptom management. During this time, it was horrendous for us family members to stand by and watch - you just feel so helpless!! However, finally the pain and nausea was brought under control and she was sent home.
However, last week she was admitted to hospital following extreme breathlessness and like you we all dreaded the results of her scans. To our devastation, the scans showed spead, not only to her lungs but also to her liver. In just a few short weeks she has gone from being relatively independent (during which time, amazingly, she mustered up enough energy to organise her own wedding and to go on a honeymoon to Europe!!) to now being almost bedridden. Like your sister, she is now on oxygen and morphine. She does not want any more treatment, but she wants to come home and so we are in the process of organising this for her with our main priority to ensure that she is comfortable and pain or nausea free. We realize that the only thing we can do is to love her and to be there for her and to just talk and listen to her.
It’s so heartbraking and my heart really goes out to you - as I really know what you are going through. Just try and be strong for her!
I’m not sure if this post will be of any help - but I just wanted to let you know that I’m thinking of you!
You might ask the doctors/nurses caring for your sister if they can prescribe Frutijuice for your sister to sip. When I had FEC chemo, I had to stop my chemo for Crohn’s and was faecally incontinent (sometimes in the street!) and got malnutrition. The Oncologist prescribed Frutijuice ( different flavours) and had them sent to my home from the hospital pharmacy. I don’t think you can buy it in the shops. Each carton contained 300 calories, and all the nutrients need to stay alive. I had to drink/sip 3 cartons a day. I found that even home made vegetable soup, with all the solids strained out, gave me instant diarrhea. I was on Frutijuice for the 4 months of chemo and although I lost 2 stones, I am eating normally now and have put the weight back on.
The other possibility in getting needed nutrition is to have parenteral feeding - they put a tube in your stomach and pump in nutritional liquid. I had it many years ago, but don’t remember what they put in the liquid.
Hope your sister gets some relief soon.
Take care,
Liz.