Sleep problems

Hello All,
I was diagnosed on the 6/12 and I’m going for my op for my snb and wle on 28th,2 more sleep.
I’ve two young children max 7 and isla 3 and a partner.
The story so far we moved to a new house about 2 months ago and he now has his own room, he was fine sleeping at first. Then a month ago his granddad died very suddenly and then two weeks after that I was diagnosed with breast cancer. I’ve spoken to him about everything but he says he hasnt got anything bothering him he is not worried about me. We spoke to the school before he broke up and they said they would talk to him but didnt. Then the past few days he is taken over 2 hours to get to sleep and waking after two hours, lots of crying and moaning and huffing and puffing, I’m at my wits end. My 3 year old has just started sleeping through and now all this he is waking everyone up. With my op coming up and chemo I dont know whether to take him to the drs or what. I’ve tried relaxation techniques all sorts, no computer games, sitting in his room. My partner has done the same,even slept in his room for bit but still he wakes up after a few hours.
Tonight whilst i’m typing this his i was in his room for an hour and he was asleep as i left the room he said he was awake and wasnt going to sleep, i said i’ll be back in 20 mins to see if he’s asleep, he said well he wont be he’ll probably be awake all night.
Any ideas would be good.
Love fran

Hi fran, merry christmas. I have two boys 7 and 11, my older son knows about my dx bc but craig my younger son doesnt. Every nite since I came out of hospital on 20th oct for wle and snb, he has called me up 2 sleep with him. Its like he knows and his scared? Your son has had so much 2 deal with in a short time but kids actually adapt better than adults. Maybe he his worried about you going into hospital especially after losing his grandad. Good luck with your operation and with max, once he sees you after ur op things may settle. Love karen x

Hi Karen,
I thought it best to tell him the facts about my bc but in a really positive way and not too much detail.
But he is finally asleep now for how long who knows. I just hope he does setlle down because its not doing him any good at all poor little thing.
Love fran

Hi Karen,
I thought it best to tell him the facts about my bc but in a really positive way and not too much detail.
But he is finally asleep now for how long who knows. I just hope he does setlle down because its not doing him any good at all poor little thing.
Love fran

I think a chat with your gp would be a good idea. Sounds like he’s finding it tough even though he’s trying to be brave during the day.

Hi Fran,
Goodness me what a lot you’ve all had to cope with in the last few weeks, it’s a wonder any of you is able to sleep. I tend to agree with Choccie that talking to your GP would be a good idea, and actually might help you to put your mind at rest on this one thing. Once you start the treatment you will need all your energy (emotional and physical) so if you can get some help to help your little one sleep, that’d be really good.

I hope all goes really well for treatmentwise… your children will cope brilliantly I am sure, they are just going to worry about mummy. There are lots of ladies on here with small children and I’m sure they can offer helpful ideas soon.

Big hug <<hug>> - to use now or save for when you need it! (a tip I learned from CM I believe)

hi fran,

hope you have had a few enjoyable days over xmas.

it sounds like your little boy maybe worrying about his mum even if he has said he is ok - maybe worth visiting your GP who may be able offer so some advice/help.

i will be thinking of you tomorrow with your op, hopefully it will be a day case and you will be home before you know it.

lots of hugs TTM xxx

Got my bag packed all ready for tomorrow! Its funny I’m not too worried about it its strange really think its because I’m going to the spire so treating it as a holiday. Just hoping for sleep tonight.
Had a chat with max about it he woke up after 2 hours but went back to sleep in my bed.
So we will try again tonight!
I’ve been thinking about it all and reading peoples stories on here. Why if I’m having an snb and wle and the cancer is in there only. Why would I need chemo? I know its a question I should ask my bcn or consultant and I will but just been thinking about it.
I’ll be fine speak to you soon.
Love fran xx

Hi fran, I had same op that ur getting. I was told that until surgery they can’t be 100% sure what size and grade or if there is node involvement and the results from the surgery will depend on what treatment. I’m 41 years, and didn’t need chemo, my onc asked me was I dissapointed I wasn’t getting it? She told me that years ago they gave everyone chemo but nowadays not everyone needs it. I’m on tamoxifen and getting rads in jan. I live in glasgow but iv seen posts from people with similar diagnosis and they get chemo, sometimes that worries me but can only assume pathology report has a lot 2 do with the oncs decision 4 my treatment. Good luck tomorrow, I felt fine after op, hope you are 2 xx

Hi Fran…thank you for your kind words and reassurance a couple of days ago. I hope all goes well for you tomorrow. As other posters have said, your son is probabaly subconsciously reacting in a way he feels secure to recent events he’s had to deal with. His school should have a school nurse attached who can help you with any questions about sleeping patterns and sleep strategies for primary aged children. Hopefully it will be temporary.
Take care Jo x

Hi gordok1,
They told me that on my diagnosis that they would be giving me chemo and tamoxifen because I’m young they want to throw everything at it but I’m 39 so not that young.
I know they will know more after surgery but it just seems strange the way diff dr’s and oncs deal with it …
Love Fran xx

hi fran,

like others have said they know more once op is done. if they have said tamoxifen then they must know this from biopsy they took initially and tested it to see if it is estrogen positive. i will be on tamoxifen as well.

sending you big hugs and speak with you soon. TTM xxx

Hi Fran

goodness me you have been through it recently…I agree with the other ladies that have said speak to your G.P about sleep patterns as he will be worried about mummy and also your recent sad loss.

My youngest who is 12 has had trouble sleeping and also does not want to talk to me, luckily he talks to his big brother who is 16 and then sleep goes back to normal…

As for treatment the surgeon was convinced my BC was oestrogen based but turned out not to be…no tamoxifan…start my chemo in January

Good luck for tomorrow will be thinking of you x x