So Scared I can’t sleep

HI I have had a lumpectomy and three nodes removed from my arm about 4 weeks ago the anxiety and the not being able to sleep is getting worse I feel like a cant cope with this. I am frightened of hospitals, needles feeling unwell you name it and now I am making things worse as now I cant sleep I cant do the days either. I have had sleeping tablets that worked a bit but now only for two hours I just can’t make my mind relax, I have tried so much I don’t know how to get through this now, does any one have any advice for me please!


Sorry you are feeling so bad.
You really need to ring your bcn and probably your GP as well and tell them how anxious and upset you are feeling. Or try the helpline here. It sounds like you need to talk to someone. It is a horrible time. It sounds like you’ve had some surgical treatment, do you know what’s next? Sometimes the not knowing is the root cause of the anxiety. there are lots of people here who are going through similar things and feeling anxious as well and you will get a lot of help and support.

But get on that phone and speak to someone as soon as you can!

Take care


hey hunny.
firstly, go and get a cup of tea take a deap breath and listen.

you will get through this. ,

your normal and feelings of anxiety are understandable. . a visit and chat to your BCN or Doc wold be good.

your fears are fears, they are unproven, so make a list of all things youll have to get through. .
ie , lumpectomy, then recover, then cemo ect ect, and tick them all off as you go along, youll soon see your coping ok and getting through them. .

we all have times on this road where we think we cant cope but we do hun, and u will in time look back at all this as a past experience.

feel free to pm if u need any advise or tips.

kaz xxxxxx

Your reaction is perfectly normal. As the others have said, phone your BCN or your GP if that is better for you. Write down everything that scares you and talk to them about these points. In particular, ask when you will get a treatment plan for the next stage, if you don’t have one already, because a lot of people find that once they know what is next and when and start to plan for this, it really helps to relieve some of the fear and anxiety.

Sometimes just having someone to listen helps, but there might be something more effective for your sleep problems and anxiety as well. Over and over again, people here say waiting and not knowing is the worst part.

Phone tomorrow.


OMG It made me cry to find that people have replied, I am just going to see a doctor now to see what he says then will have to wait till tom. to ring BCN, its my 40th birthday today so smile for me x

Again - just to reassure and back you up - what everyone else has said is perfectly true.

If you were to find any of our first posts you’ll see that we were in the same place as you are now and that it really does get easier.

Of course you’re anxious and scared - you would be in denial if you weren’t, it’s normal.

I too has sleeping pills, which helped but found that once i started my treatment i didn’t need to use them.

You don’t need to cope with this on your own - take advantage of the Nurses and hospital, friends and family, wail and shout and swear! Then as Poppy says, take one step at a time; the problem you have at the minute is that you don’t know the next step and so you’re busy trying to fill in the gaps. - and try not to ‘Google’, you’ll come away with everything under the Sun!

It truly is the worst part but it will get better. x

Not sleeping is awful isn’t it? As others have said though what you are feeling is perfectly normal. I didn’t really sleep properly for 2 years after diagnosis and often had to resort to diazepam to knock me out. If you need meds to help you sleep while you get through this then so be it.

You will cope. The stage your are at is the hardest of all.
I felt just like you did. Most of us did.
Hang in there and take each step of the process as it comes. And be sure to tell your BCN how you are feeling. Try to find some “cancer buddies” to go through treatment with - it really helps.
All the best.

Hi I’ve just been dx with sec to lungs so I know what u mean about slp I’m awake most nights if u fancy a chat in the night pm me I’ll be happy to chat to u tc laura

you say you have had lumpectomy and nodes removed, have you had any results from them yet? the girls are right speak to someone and talk it through, Its hard to cope without sleep, it’s something that happens to us all hun, keep reading and joining in here…that can be the greatest help!! waiting is tough but once you have atreatment plan things tend to get easier, let us know how you are doing and when you get results, between us we are, with you in front of you and behind you!!! lots of love to you jeanette xxx

The waiting for your results is the worst time but you will be able to take one step at a time when they give you the treatment plan.

I struggled badly waiting for the results - could not sleep and broke down in tears with the GP nurse - she was only there to give me a flu jab! She spent the next half an hour with me and called me back in a couple of days later.

It will feel now as though you cannot bear this but you will - we all do. We do have times when we scream and shout, cry and ask “why me” - but we will be here if you need to shout.

Happy 40th Birthday. Have a good a day as you can. By your next one you will look back and hopefully it will all be a past experience.

Sorry you feel so awful. This is a big bunch of sh*t to have to deal with - you are in a tailspin and it feels absolutely dreadful. I remember as well, there were some days I couldn’t stop shivering and shaking. My emotional ‘crutch’ to see me through the first while was diazepam (valium) which gave me some much needed respite. It gave me a small sense of control (I could decide if and when I needed to take a tablet). It’s not for everyone I know but it was my brother-in-law doctor who suggested to me that these days there is no need to go without sleep and suffer more anguish than is necessary when there are medicines which are designed for just this kind of thing to give you a bit of breathing space and time to get your head around it all. As others say, this hellishness will surprisingly pass given time.

i know only too well wot you are feeling as im the very same havent sleept in months now and it isnt doing me any good my family is on the recieving end as im grumpy with them all the time as if im trying to push them away is how thay see it i know i need to see my doc which is just wot im going to do and i know the min i open my mouth the tears will roll just like they are now typing this you not alone hun you will get though this just sometime we all need a little help im just waiting to start chemo so i hope my gp can give me somethink before i crack up and do more damage life just dont seem fair but we must keep going
bigs hugs
maz xxx