It is great and really hits home. I have felt exactly like this (a bit with BC but more so after being diagnosed with MS in 2003 and as a result have suffered from back pain ever since). While family have been great, some friends really haven’t ‘got’ it. Have had to do the ‘spoon’ thing a lot over the past years, when I have had to choose between doing different things (lots of nights spend in the house, not good when you are in your twenties/early thirties). Do you think it is a bit cheeky to send this to friends, probably is a bit but would love them to read it! I think you will all agree that when you have an illness it really makes you realise what is important - just wish others could learn this.
Made me stop and think bout how much pressure I have placed on myself. Between meds for epilepsy,19mth old baby,work, and the 5yr chemo hangover, the tiredness and stress never really gets less, and the guilt at not being as good as others at daily tasks gets worse. Wish I’d known about this when I was diagnosed ,it would have been the best way to explain it, and maybe it will work now for the epilepsy. Sometimes I found that it was those closest who understood the least.
The sister of a friend is about to go through it all soon, and I think the spoons is one of the most helpful bits of advice I could give her.
Thankyou Revcat! I will use this when I am struggling as my colleagues expect me to back to 100% and the reality is I stll need to count out those spoons!
Thanks SO much for posting this! While not directly about bc, I wouldn’t have seen it if I wasn’t a member of this forum…
I posted the link to my daughter-in-law, who copes amazingly cheerfully with chronic pain and fatigue (she’s had a diagnosis of fibromyalgia). She says the “spoon” theory has helped her to explain better to family and friends, and she’s posted the link on her FB page.
One comment is that she found it quite tiring to read the looooooooong article!!
I myself am blessed with sufficient spoons… so here’s a cyberspoon for all who need one today
I’m loving this spoon theory thread. It’s a really brilliant way to explain
energy reserves (or lack thereof). One thing I dread if I have to go through chemo is trying to get support from my pig ignorant boss at work. My job is very stressful and in his opinion you’re either fully fit for work or off sick…you try dealing with that! Had a bad enough time with him last year when I ended up off sick with stress because he couldn’t/wouldn’t give me any support when I lost two chemo friends within 8 weeks of another, my father was seriously ill and my 5 year check up threw up stuff that needed investigating. Shame that I see my return to work after all this is over as my greatest challenge because support is poor.
RevCat, you’ve just made me laugh yet again! Can I please borrow one of your ladles? There are several people round here who could do with a serious thwacking.
I spent a couple of hours at the British Museum today with my brother. We saw some lovely spoons dating 600BC. Security was too tight, I could not take them for you. So here is one of mine as I can quite easily spare one for the time being.
what a great article. Thank you again for posting link. Going through hellish time at work myself and some evenings have run out of spoons so dine on bread and butter instrad of cooking. Must remember to keep an emergency spoon in reserve. xx
I explained the spoon theory to my colleagues, who now ask me if I have enough spoons to do x, y or Z…
brilliant… and it SO helps me to think about it being “outside me” not my failure… and somehow, some days, I KNOW I’ve only got a couple of spoons left and shouldn’t tackle something tricky right now… Thanks so much for it…Jane
Now the forums are pretty much up and running again (thank you techies and mods) and because there are people who don’t know what we are on about when we speak of spoons, I thought maybe this one needed a BUMP. On Page 1 Post 1 is the link to the ‘spoon theory’ which many find very helpful.
And for anyone who needs them a few to start you off…
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\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_) This is a large "thwacking ladle" for anyone/thing that annoys you! 
Thankyou Revcat I have often wondered about the spoons but felt daft asking , it makes total sense now. Although my family understand how tired I get I think sometimes they forget as I am always been told how “well” I look, I have liver mets and have just changed to letrozole and have really bad joint ache and pains and some days just want to stay in bed and cry, my cousin passed away recently with BC and secondaries after a six year battle and it has brought my own morality to the fore having a very tearful and black week. The sunshine has helped to raise my spirits as does reading posts from other ladies on this forum. Sadly a new day does not always mean a new supply of spoons!!!
