starting chemo in January 2012

Public Archive
1901

morning ladies still not slept. Let OH lie in and sorted kids myself, they’ve all left now for school and nursery. Emma Lol Yea my son is 4 and a half and daughter 15 months. My brain is defo mush I’m exactly how you explained forget wat I’m saying mid sentence. Blaming the chemo! Masterchef was good all did well cooking at restaurant bar Andrew who served it cold as he was too bloody slow as per usual. But shelina and tom did cracking. In kitchen shelina and Andrew did Excellent but tom’s fish was raw. I think on again tonight!

Julianna no round 2 OH was snoring youngest lo woke up for milk at 2am so gave her that and just led there trying to fall asleep. OH was snoring so peacefully would’ve felt too guilty waking him. OH Decided to take day off so maybe I’ll be in luck Lol.

Jo are you going to have a kip this morning? Not sure wat to do in all honesty!

Lynzi you still high as a kite or did you manage to catch some sleep? X

1902

DISASTER! Think my chemo brain forgot to watch latest Masterchef. Off to check out iplayer to redress this terrible error!
Catherine xx

1903

Blimey, it’s taken half an hour to catch up since yesterday evening!

I managed some sleep last night, in between sweats. This is new. I’ve had ‘cold sweats’ before my period in the past as was already perimenopausal, but never hot sweats. I had four last night and one on each of the previous 2 nights. Yesterday nursey said ‘so this’ll be the chemo affecting your hormones now’. Oh joy! And of course you can’t take HRT after BC, especially if on tamoxifen. What are we supposed to do? Just suffer? Will have to do some research.

OH has gone off to boat whilst I take it easy. I actually feel OK so far, but know I must be very careful not to overdo it. There’s plenty to do at home. I’m praying that I don’t get the dreadful stomach upset I had last time.

I have no children, but sympathise with having to look after lo’s. I’m not an early riser and can’t even commit to having a dog which would need walking in the morning! It must be very difficult dealing with their feelings and worries. But I too believe children can be very resilient.

Fingers crossed on the results of your CT scan Kim. Hopefully you won’t have to wait very long.

So sorry about your stepdad Emma. Is it still impossible for your to visit him?

Am off to have a shower now, then do the washing up and then see how I feel before deciding what to do next. I always seem to have pile of boring paperwork to deal with, you know bills to pay, forms to fill in. I’m supposed to be doing a newsletter for the berth holders’ association but can’t seem to be bothered, it’s way down on my list. Don’t know why I told you that really. Boring.

Will stop there. Spect I’ll be back later.

Dawn XX

1904

Mary, do you know if you will need rads after mx?

Julianna, I’m so with you on the loss of nipples - i will have new ones made, but sadly they will only be decorative.
When I was Dx, I was wanting chemo ASAP as I was more afraid of the possibility that the cancer had escaped the lymph nodes. Think this was because they said I was unlucky such a small tumour had already spread to the lymph nodes. Not that I had a choice, the team had decided neoadjuvant was the best plan for me.
Thought you were ambitious with learning Spanish lol.

Ha ha Lynzi with the wig swopping!

Big hug Joyce, it must be real hard for lo’s seeing mummy look different and not really understand what is going on. I think lo’s are very perceptive and pick up on atmospheres and feelings but can’t workout what is going on. Lots of cuddles are the answer I think.

Now then Kim, get all that silly nonsense out of your head - us gals are your bosom buddies and will be here for you throughout all of this. We are your shoulder to cry on, and we are your girlie mates to share a giggle with.
Good luck with today’s juicing x

Emma, thinking about your stepdad and your mum and sending them lots of healthy positive vibes.

Highlight of the day for me is my Onc appointment, and doing bloods for Fridays first Tax and Herceptin.

Bet you lot are all having a doze.

Sue x

1905

Dawn,I know takes ages to catch up doesnt it,you only have to blink and pages appear!Not sure if i can visit my stepdad,my mum is going to find out today.obviously the ward was closed due to a virus outbreak but it was reopened yesterday…obviously i have to be careful.I would so much want to see him,my little sister went to see him yesterday and he turned and gave her a huge smile…
Mary thanks for the update on masterchef,i should of recorded it but wasnt thinking,i will watch tonight.
Well i went back to bed for a couple of hours after kids went to school as had headache and nausea,it did help as i feel a bit better but it shall be a day of lounging on the sofa…
hopefully everyone else feeling okay and having a lovely day

Emma xxx

1906

Hi Just checking to see if my post post,s as I did a big post yesterday and it disappeared???

Maggie

1907

Haha Mary & Julianna I think I was just hyper to get another one out of the way problem free. Just the se’s to go through now then less to go that what I’ve had. Feeling rather well but then again I usually do at this point.

Hmmm no I’m not sure what I’ve said here but it’s one of the regulars in our local pub I’m confusing. Sorry I blame chemo brain haha gonna get Mark to have a word with him! Lol I’ve got my race for life sponsor form up on the notice board but he’s obviously not seen that Haha

mind you Geoff asked me if it was me doing it then went on to tell me how many people he’s come across that has died from cancer so I guess he doesn’t know either. Every time I see him he says he’s going up to my place again (work, hospital) with his eye - every single time. Sure it’s been months n he still hasn’t been lol arghhhh!!! On about his double vision getting worse…can’t b that bad if he’s still driving about lol

Right I’m rambling now, I’m going back to catch up lol

xxx

Edit no2 haha

1908

Thank you all - LO is only 2, 3 in a couple weeks. Think he was majorly tired last night and me on a downer didn’t help. But got big cuddles this and 2 ED’s are not bothered about commando look, and if i do put the wig on LO tells me to “take my hair off it’s silly”, so i can;t win!!!

Bit icky this am, but OH has week off for lambing and is ferrying kids to school and back so lazy week for me. District nurses ar finally coming to give me my injections!!! After asking me “was i sure i couldn’t do it myself”, obviously i am a bit of a bother for them!! Do they ask the elderly to change their own dressings too!!??

Kim - hope Ct scan results quick and ok, i have another in a week on my liver as they spotted a 4mm blip on 1st one that they want to re check!! hate the wait for the scan, then hate the wait for the results!!

Sunny day in Wales, but no enthusiasm to go out…tv it is!!!

1909

Ah Catherine imagine it. Me going back to work with that honour haha think we’ll all be more qualified than our oncs, I mean come on they havent actually gone through it have they. They should take a dose so they know what they’re talking about rather than what they’ve been told or read.

xxx

1910

Hi ladies. Still not slept don’t think i wana now due to take last lot of steroids at 1230 and then guna go to support group. Discussing alternative therapies today.

Sue the registrar yesterday said they don’t usually offer rads after mx in my position but she Will discuss with me on final 6th chemo as trial going on to see if makes a difference. They say rads have se’s too which i wasn’t aware of but I’ll take everything i can get if it helps avoid any of this crap for future.
Just watched last week’s take me out now watching big fat gypsy weddings good job i record everything!

On normal day i usually up at 6:30am to get kids sorted but since feeling crap OH usually gets up now. He is fast asleep on sofa right now bless him. Stayed up with me till about 2am he is knackered so decided to let him.

Lynzi glad you’re feeling well Lets hope it lasts and your se’s are small and manageable.

Maggie how annoying re missing post. Hope you ok.

Emma hun i no you really wana see step dad but be extra cautious hun you are vunerable and need to stay safe.

Dawn glad you’re feeling well sweats must be a nightmare tho. Now don’t you be overdoing it today rest up the work Will still be there tomorrow!

Anyway need to eat something for me to take my steroids. Even tho not slightly hungry but very thirsty mind.

Catch you all later x x Mary x x

1911

Tax truck is coming! Tax truck is coming!

I think I have an idea now what is in store… Fingers crossed it is just my paranoia.

Went to the shop around the corner to get the almond oil (it is bliss on my poor hands!) and I feel my limbs are made of lead …

1912

Feeling brighter today. I was so tried yesterday and I don’t know why, went to bed with a headache at 9:30. Dawn I’m also having lots of sweats especially at night but now having the odd one in the day.
Went to clinic this morning and they managed to get blood; 6 bottle in total. I also had rads chat. I will be having 3 weeks worth and will start 3 weeks after last chemo. They will also include the nodes in my neck/collarbone. I will be having CT scan in the next few weeks and my tatoo markings in readiness. I have a repeat echo in 2 weeks then an MRI scan around cycle 9 (herceptin is counted as a cycle). The registrar was fantastic and spent an hour going over everything with me. She also told me to take all 8 steroids in one go tomorrow morning so that they are in my system a good 24 hours before chemo on Friday so that will be interesting. Having PICC fitted tomorrow and that can stay in until I have my last herceptin if I don’t have any problems with it.

I missed Masterchef as well but I did watch The Hairy Bikers new series where they travel all over Europe cooking. They were in Norway last night.

On mx’s, I had a choice of WLE or mx. The BCN showed me loads of pictures of both ops but told me that research said that there was no difference in the prognosis. My tumour was on the outer edge of my boob and clearly defined. The surgeon got 2mm clear margins and because she went in through my nipple I have no scar apart from in my arm pit from where they took all my lymph nodes. I keep wondering if a mx would have been a better choice but the onc today said that treatment is so much more effective these days so mind at rest again.

Anne xx

1913

Has anyone got any advice on sore mouth? I think I’ve got thrush - tongue is gross, white, cracked and very sore since last night. Am off to the hospital for them to look at it.

Still feeling very weak, struggling to eat anthing at all (am losing weight rapidly). When will this nightmare end?

Jane

1914

Hi ladies have not been on for a while I have been very depressed.
Of all places I broke down in marks and spencers changing room! I was trying on bras and nothing fitted. I had a MX and reconstruction, but it got infected and had to have plastic surgery to repair the wound area. Good breast is a 40d and the othe40B. God I was in a state. Luckily for me the changing room lady was very suported as her sister had breast cancer a few years ago. Last week ended up in A&E and spent a night in hospital due to chest infection.
Fec 4 next tuesday hopfully if bloods ok on monday.
Sent away for breast enhancers not sure what they will be like hopefully it will pack out the space in my bra. failing that OH sock

It has taken a few days to catch up with you all on here. It has been lovely reading all your comments I wish you all well I think I will go and bake a cake always takes my mind of things and pull myself together

xx

Debby

1915

I don’t know how you do it Julianna. You always make me smile or laugh. Shame you can’t run out of the way of that dreaded tax truck. Fingers crossed you won’t feel too bad.

Blimey Anne you’ve got a lot of appointments at the moment. Good luck with the PICC tomorrow. So far (fingers and everything crossed) my PICC has been a godsend. The nurses just love me and visibly relax when they realise they don’t have to cannulate me. I bought a sleeve to keep my arm dry whilst showering and it works brilliantly. Not sure if I can put a link here, but it’s a Limbo and I have the one that just covers the elbow. Cling film does NOT work.

I watched the Hairy Bikers last night and now I want to go to Norway, but it sounds very expensive though.

I hope you get a chance some time Mary today to have a snooze and catch on your sleep. I find reading a book sends me off.

Time for some lunch, maybe scrambles eggs on toast.

1916

Ah Emma u got it in one, I never shut up haha

I’m such a plank I should read me posts before I click submit but it’s awkward on me phone. Think maybe I should stop admitting to how many edits I do hahaha

Hope you’re well love, as can be anyway xx

1917

Hi Ladies - its going to take me a while to catch up with you all :slight_smile:

Is anyone on here in the same stage as me - round 4 of TAX, (with 2 more to go) and then 4 weeks of RADS.

Also - what are the reasons to some of you have 3 x FEC, and then 3 x TAX, rather than 6 x TAX last me.

This last round of chemo has really been my worst yet - it has taken me a week before I have had less than zero energy…so not looking forward to that feeling again :frowning: Dosent help having a stinking cold I guess.

Love to you all

Sharon x

1918

Well – arms and hands are still agony – hence lack of posting. Glad that juicing seems to have gone well for the many ladies who’ve had it this week and also that generally you seem to be doing well with se’s so far.

Wow, Marina – Friday sounds like a very packed day for you – hope everything goes as best as it can – will be thinking of you. Well done to your lo’s on their recent achievements. How is the new arrival settling in – brrrmmm brrrmmm?

Hi Sharon – welcome to you – thanks for sharing your experiences. Hope you’re feeling better soon.

Anne – wishing you all the best for having your PICC line inserted tomorrow and for your juicing on Friday.

Kim - mixed feelings are so understandable - waiting for any info. is an absolute nightmare. Hope you get your results speedily. I’ve not had any scans yet but know I will be on tenterhooks.

Oh Joyce, sorry you’ve had a few difficult moments this week. I felt really sad yesterday as apparently my lo had been crying at school saying he wanted his mommy – so very unlike him – he is usually happiness on legs all the time. Sue is so right about them being perceptive to how we are feeling – I’ve also been quite down this cycle.

Mary, thanks for your supportive words re arms – I’m not having the thinning injections at the moment – GP said as clots are in the superficial veins he wanted to try to deal with them topically at first but if that doesn’t work, looks like systemic treatment will follow. Will discuss it with onc. next week when I go. Glad you’re juicing went OK . With you on the fussing about hair loss front! I sometimes almost wish the cold cap wasn’t working quite so well so I’d have an excuse to get rid of it all – but after all those hours spent with the blinking thing freezing my brain …
Thought I’d treat myself and went to the hairdressers this morning. Have had it taken a bit shorter – now sitting around shoulder-length. Found it a bit stressful - was terrified it was all going to come out in her hands - wasn’t quite the pampering experience I had envisaged!

Emma – really feel for you and your mum – hope your SD starts to improve soon. I can clearly remember how worrying those first days were. Re: visiting - please be careful about putting yourself at risk. Big hugs x.

Kim, Emma – my lo leaves infant school in July and they have a prom too – he will be 6!!! It’s hilarious isn’t it. Have to get him a dinner suit!

Julianna, Sue – so understand fear of losing nipple – with you on that - generally terrified of prospect of mx. Hope you dodge the tax truck, Julianna.

Debby – sorry you’ve had a difficult time – hope you feel better soon. Mmmm baking - what sort of cake are you making?

Lynzi - you’ve said so much I’ve forgotten it all - haha - so I’m just sending you a big wave and a hug for now x

Well out for a meal with some girly friends tonight - first time I’ve seen them since diagnosis. Really looking forward to it.

Big hugs to everyone and good luck for the rest of this week’s juicers. x

1919

Mary I did well for sleep luckily so I’m happy, woke about 3ish for loo coz I’m drinking so much and then again woke myself about half 8 and got up for me steroids. Had me 2nd lot a few hour ago and me injection so only a few more sickness pills and I’m done for today x

1920

It looks like it was only a Tax bicycle and not the truck yet.

Had a lovely kip and feel much better!

Anne, glad you are feeling better! 6 bottles of blood! Of course, you need ‘extra’ ones for the trials.

I’ll be having 6 weeks (30 sessions) of rads, all to my boob, the whole boob and nothing but the boob.

Jane, you poor thing! Only advice I have on sore mouth that looks like a trush is to go see your onc, which you are already doing! I was told it is quite common with Tax. Must be awful!

Summer, sorry to hear you are depressed. Is it everything? If you are in a need of a pram, mine is free! Is there a plan to do ‘something’ with your recon in the future? I hope so! You know we are here for you if you need a space to went! I find moaning here about anything and everything is very beneficial! First I thought I shouldn’t bring my dark and negative thoughts here, not to bring you girls down, but I think you are the only people who understand and can actually lift my spirit!

Sharon, Lynzi is Tax only treatment, I think she is on number 3 or 4. I think the gold standard is 3 FEC and 3 Tax, not sure why you would only get Tax or only FEC - did you ask your onc about it? They MUST have a reason!

Dawn, I think the Norwegian fjords on a boat would be a fantastic trip in Pronkjewail! Norway IS expensive but you can’t beat the scenery.

Mouth is a bit yucky, but not yucky enough to put me off me food (start to think NOTHING can) - off to forage in the kitchen …

Catch you all lovely ladies later!