Starting Chemo in Nov 2011

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Hi ladies

Lulu- good luck with your rads. My oncologist has decided I don’t need rads.I’m relieved but part of me is slightly paranoid that not having it is not belt and braces. i hope you’re feeling less tired today.

weme - glad to hear you’re home and healing

audrey - no I’ve gone straight back to work full time but my workload isn’t too bad at the moment and I am leaving at 5pm every day. I am pretty shattered by 4pm though.

I’ve not had any scans since the MRI before my MX but I guess that’s because there was no node involvement and I had the MX first and chemo after. Friends keep asking me whether they do any tests to see whether the cancer has gone and when I will get the ‘all clear’ and I find it quite hard to answer.

I’ve started my Tamoxifen today so am now waiting for side effects from that. So far I have a headache and feel tired but I guess that could still be the chemo leaving my system.

Lizzyxx

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Hello All

Lizzy - You are doing well working full time. When did you have your last chemo? My last one was 24th Jan and I am still feeling exhausted and can’t really do anything. When I do eventually go back to work I have to see Ocupational Health and it will be a phased return. I have been off sick over 7 months. Don’t know if I will remember how to do everything. I started my hormone treatment of Letrozole last Thursday together with calcium tablets (for nmy bones). Don’t think I have had any side effects yet. A few hot flushes but I had some of them on chemo and since I stopped taking HRT when I was diagnosed with BC.

Lulu - Hope your rads today went ok. I have had my 3rd now. My arm is a bit stiff but I must try and do my excercises. I am booked in for physio I think it is next week. I assume it will be later this week or next before I get any side effects. I am using E45 cream twice a day and washing with simple soap. Also not wearing a bra but wearing cotton vest tops with wide straps.

Hope everyone else is ok and not suffering too much. Troodles hope you have had your last chemo.

love
Axx

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Hello Ladies,

Yes, hope your last chemo went well, Trudie! and that your first rads went well today, Lulu. Yes, think we should start calling you Luminous Lou!

Hmm, it seems that those of you who had mx first, don’t get mid scans, but that those who have the mx after, do tend to get them. Gail, I thought too, that having a mid scan would help them decide how many chemo sessions to give you. I’m sorry I keep harping on about it, but the novelty of it all has well and truly worn off now. Fed up of being ill and I’m just not bouncing back the same anymore.

Lulu, I don’t want to have a special kind of BC! I’ve looked at pictures of IBC, and my boob didn’t really look like that. It did go very mishapen, very quickly, but it also returned back to normal very quickly too. Before chemo, I do remember my Onc commenting on my boob being slightly red, but I was too embarressed to tell her that that was what was left of my sun tan! (and the other one looked just the same colour!) I’m afraid, I don’t tan very well at all, and it might have been red to her, but to me, it was quite brown!!! (My other half and family have always laughed when I put on my Factor 30+, but I burn very easily otherwise!)

I actually put paintbrush to paper for the first time today in 4 months and finished a piece I’d started last October! Its the first time, since then, that I felt well enough to finish it, without comletely ruining it. I have to say, I found it quite difficult, and didn’t particularly enjoy it either. Its so hard to feel creative, which is why I haven’t done any work since all this started, because most of my commissions normally come with tight deadlines, and I can’t do that when I feel s**t and don’t know how I will feel from one day to another.
I really admire those of you who have managed to carry on working through all this, I don’t know how you’ve done it. Sometimes it takes me all my time just to get out of bed in the morning. Thank God my OH has always been an early riser and has sorted out the kids in the morning!

Kym xx

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Hello all
I hope you last chemo went well, Trudie and you first rads Lulu. I also hope Teresa’s and Weme’s recovery is still going well.

I haven’t had breast scan since the MRI before my MX and that was mainly to check they hadn’t missed anything on the other side. Apart from that it was the Mamogram and Ultrasound went I first went to hospital with my lump. I did have my Mx first, but they did find 5 out of 9 of the nodes they took out at the same time were affected. I had a CT and Bone scan to check for secondaries, but one was after the first chemo and the other 3 days after the second, as that was when the equipment was available. The CT scan would have been easier if I hadn’t been suffering from Phlebitis from my new PICC Line in my left arm and a spot of Lymphobema in my right as a Chemo side-effect. Putting my arms over my head just wasn’t happening that day, however much the nice man (and he was very nice) asked!

I am one of the people who has worked throughout (weell with a week off for chemo). But I work in IT so I have mainly worked from home and when the joints have been achy from TAX I have worked lying on the sofa. It is just less boring than day-time TV! I also only work 3.5 daya a week.

Had an argument with my husband tonight. Apparently I came downstairs and immediately started critising his cooking. In fact, I was checking the acidity and effect of the red pepper in the bolognese sauce he had made, so I could determine if I could eat it with the large mouth ulcer I seem to have developed. I felt it was better to check before he dished up and definitely not at the table with the 5 year-old listening. I pointed out that I wasn’t particularly enjoying having mouth ulcers, breast cancer or any other side effects. I also reminded him that the pepper he had put in the sauce had felt like raw chilli in my mouth (admittedly when the pepper was raw) only yesterday, so putting it in a sauce was maybe not the best idea. Ho hum, I guess these things do put a strain on any relationship, but he is not the most empathetic of people (and rarely asks how I am feeling).

Still apart from the mouth ulcer and a spot of lymphodema I am relatively side-effect free, so I guess I should be happy (ish). Yesterday I was considering becoming a flamingo, so I could send the right hand side of my body for a good long sleep to help it all heal. Is this an option? Mind you, I guess flamingos don’t get breast cancer in the first place.

Sorry, rambling now. Best go and read a bedtime story.

Sue

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evening Ladies, sorry i’m not posting often at the moment, i don’t seem to have much get up and go to do anything much at the moment, i also admire those who have been still working, even if it is from home (Amysmum, wasn’t it)
good to hear Teresa and Weme doing ok following their Mx’s

i’ve been interested to read posts about Rads, i have my 1st on thurs, it feels a bit strange not having to be having chemo this week, I don’t know if this is anything to do with finishing chemo or not but i haven’t been eating as much as i was, i’m actually feeling full. I’m really happy about this, and hope it continues, maybe by the time i go back to work mid april my work trousers will fit again!

Our school did World Book Day on friday as Thurs was St Davids day, my daughter went as The Cat in The Hat, she looked great, and it was good to have the time to put together a costume for her

I am going to be doing Race for Life in May, i have done it once before, but this year some close friends and family members are getting together to do it, i feel i need to give something back for all the support i’ve received, i will however, more than likely walk the whole 5k!!

Gill x

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Lizzy - You’re doing well working full time. I’m in the office full time on my good week, but I go in early so I can leave before 4pm to beat the traffic. I don’t think I’d last until 5pm.

AmysMum - I work in IT too. It’s really handy being able to work from home some of the time. Hope the mouth ulcers clear up soon so you can enjoy OHs cooking again.

Kym - I know what you mean about the novelty wearing off. I feel I should be seeing the light at the end of the tunnel with one more chemo to go, but I think I just see the next tunnel coming up just now.

Gill - I think even walking the 5K will be quite an achievement. Make the most of not having chemo this week and good luck with the start of rads. I guess it makes sense that your appetite will go back to something more normal now.

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I did try to post yesterday but crashed on me. Last chemo done and dusted, am chuffed as each one really taking it our of me towards the end. I know I have the se’s to come but I think knowing I have finished will hopefuuly make them more tolerable!

I have been working too, after FEC I did part time week 2 and full time week 3. Tax hit me a lot harder and getting bugs after each one didn’t help. I have been in week 3 but decided I am going to chill this time ready for rads on the 26th. My business partner seems to be coping well without me so I will let him carry on. lol

I also start the Tamoxifen about the same time as the rads, I have started the evening primrose oil which my onc said can help with hot flushes and any small se’s on the Tam.

Hope everyone else is getting on ok, those that have had their mx’s are feeling a bit better and hugs to everyone.

Trudi

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Trudi, congrats for finishing chemo, yay :slight_smile: I hope the SEs are not too bad.

I work in an office which and sit on my backside all day which has helped. I have had a week and a half off with each chemo cycle and have always left on time rather than doing the late hours I used to do. My firm have also been good and taken most of my workload off me and are easing me back into it.

Right speaking of work it’s time for me to go home!

take care everyone
Lizzyxx

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Hi There All,

Havnt posted for a bit, seems everyone is at different stages now some with Mastectomys after Chemo some Having Rad’s some not, some with Tamoxofen some not, so confusing and hard to keep up, Well good luck to us All, Amazing how shattered this makes you feel mentally and physically, I work as a chef and find it tough going,
Made lunch, Place with prawn sauce… split shift today, back at 6.30 for the evening session, Chicken and Spinach pancakes with Parmesan … and its a killer work for the Gentry and they unbeleivably can not put something in the oven then take it out 30 mins later, even if everything else is done… So cue me with aching joints, sore feet and nails , streaming eyes and hot and cold flushes Grrrrr!!! Rant Rant…
A good friend won £33,000 on the Lottery this weekend, Oh but to dream, I am so glad for them but wouldnt it be nice to have such luck!!
Anyway best get out of bed and back to the grind, Start Rads next monday and they say that makes you tired too, Tamoxofen No idea what se’s that has, Just got to keep going.
Love to you All Ladies hope all the Se’s are little ones,

Diane xxxx

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Like I said before, I’m amazed so many of you have been able to carry on working through all this!
I’m off to see a physologist/counsellor tomorrow. I’m not really relishing it at all and feel a bit of a fraud. When I saw my Onc last week, I was still coming out of my ‘feeling grotty’ phase. (The Oncs normally only tend to see you in week 3, when you’re in your good week, but I see saw her a week earlier due to her being away this week). Hence, I was still in my ‘burst into tears at the drop of a hat’ mood. Which I duly did when I was complaining about my side effects (i.e. the bone pain and me feeling that someone was jumping up and down on my bones and they it felt like my knee caps were being twisted). She said she would give me more steroids to counteract that this next time (not sure about that at all, I’m already on double dose compared to EC - and won’t they make me put on even more weight?) and that it may help me to talk to someone. To be quite honest, I don’t really want to talk to anyone at all, because I find being on here kind of sorts me out. I only got a bit upset coz I still hadn’t recovered properly from the last lot of Taz!
Ho hum. Hope she hasn’t got me down as someone who can’t cope! :frowning:
Noticed one of my big toes was looking a bit bruised this morning, then realised it’s the dreaded tax SE. Oh b****r!
Hope everyone who’s recovering from chemo is not suffering, and best of luck to others who are having it this week. Also, hope those who have started rads are coping well.
Kym xx

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hi Kym, i wouldn’t worry about whether your onc thinks you can’t cope, thats prob not what she’s thinking at all, but take advantage of the fact that you now have an appointment, you never know, you might get something out of it. I do understand why you’re reluctant though, My team leader has told me about a counselling service which i can access through work, but i kind of feel i have enough people to talk to.

Diane - your lucky friend! a little bit of luck like that would be nice.
Tamoxifen - i’ve got a feeling that se’s on that could be…hate to say it…weight gain!!! No!!! why is it always weight gain? Also hot flushes

i wonder if L4W still has the spreadsheet and has everyones progress on?

Trudi - well done on last chemo :slight_smile:

hope those having rads or chemo this week are doing ok xx

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Hi Gill, Yes, you’re probably right as re the counselling. I’ll go tomorrow anyway, and see how it goes. Its just that I had a counsellor years ago when I got post natal depression after I had my daughter, and to be honest, I thought it was a waste of time, and I only told him what it was I thought he wanted to hear. Hence I only had about 3 sessions, coz he thought I was perfectly fine! (it didn’t help that I had those sessions at home, usually when my mum was here. I always had visions of her with a glass to the kitchen wall, while I was next door in the living room, trying to hear what I was saying, coz she’s mega nosy!! I don’t confide in her really coz it’d be all around Kendal in no time!)
And yes, GG, how fab your friend won lots of money on the lottery!!! I did it for about 10 years, and got fed up, coz I won nothing. Then my best friend was on telly 2 years ago when she and 10 workmates won 4 million between them! So, I’ve resumed doing it again ever since, and won about £30. Still, gotta be in it, to win it - (she sez thru gritted teeth), lol.
xx

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Kym - hope the counselling session goes ok, i have a vision of you whispering to a counsellor, and your mum with her ear against the door! lol

i have set up a just giving donation page for when i do the Race for Life, and i’m really pleased that i’ve already got £80 sponsorship, my older daughter is doing it too, she did her justgiving page yesterday and i think shes got about £40. And thats just through facebook.

Gill x

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Hi All

Hope everyone is doing OK. Im up one minute and down the next…like all of us I guess. But Im up today :-))

Just letting you know about a programme on Sky Living tomorrow night (Thursday) called “Five”.

Its on Sky Living HD at 9pm (channel 107);
Its on Sky Living +1 at 10pm (channel 123)

It is five short films exploring the impact of Breast Cancer on peoples lives (directed by Demi Moore & Jennifer Aniston) especially being shown as its international womens day.

Apparently its a tear jerker so have the tissues at the ready.

Heres a link, the trailer wasn’t working earlier but it may work for you

skyliving.sky.com/international-womens-day/five-promo?DCMP=Sky+Living-search-sslc

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Evening Ladies,

This is just a quick update as will post more tomorrow.

I had my MUGA heart scan result today and it is 79 - was 80 in October so I am delighted. Can’t believe my body is functioning so well after, as my onc nurse said, “taking a battering with really powerful drugs.” We all have so be proud you have survived it.

No chemo tomorrow but a ‘reload’ of Herceptin and pick up letrozole (Femara) pills - the post-menopausal equivalent of Tamoxifen.

Hope you are all doing well and take care, love, Liz, xx

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Just popping into say hiya and ope our all getting on ok.

Liz great news on your heart scan thats fab… Hope herceptin oes ok tomorrow

Gill good luck with the race for life I can’ hardly contemplate walking 5 meters let alone 5 k at the mo…

Kym hope our counselling went ok… Iv had counselling at various points and find it really helpful… But then I do like talking… Anyway it did help me get my thoughts processed.

I have rads no 4 tomorrow and mums got her annual Mammo she’s now seven years post diagnosis.

Gill iv been on tamox off and on for 6 years and I wouldn’t say it causes weight gain but it did make it a bit more difficult to lose weight in my experience. I restarted my tamox yesterday after getting my line out.

That was a bit of an experience as it bled for longer than it should have done… It was meant to take 15 mins to get the line out and 15 mins to stop the bleeding but after 30 mins it still hadn’t stopped and ended up taking almost an hour before it stopped bleeding but it’s absolutely fine now.

Love and hugs
Lulu x

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Good Afternoon ladies

I am slowly but surely getting back to myself, I think I am about post 12 days after last tax. Still have a stinking cold which doesnt want to go. Has anyone ever had like cold sores up their nose, is there anything you can take for it… its so painful…

I too am an I T lady so have been working through most of my treatments to date only because I can work from home and my company have been great, if I can work brill, if I cant then I dont…

I am starting to think the sunny weather might be with us again, its been looking quite hopeful here for the last couple of days.

I went for my pre-admission appointment yesterday and am all set for 21st March for the Lumpectomy and ANC, they say it should be a day case. Im due to start the tamoxifen next week so i will see if that has any impact on me… Ill be missing my next Herceptin appointment as the ONC said to get surgery out of the way first then start again which is a bit of a pain as it means I will be there for the 5 hours just incase I have a reaction…

Kym, how was the counselling , I was considering going to it at the Haven but not sure how I would feel…

Lulu , hope the rads are going okay. Are you feeling tired ? Hope all goes well with your mums mammo tomorrow :slight_smile:

Lisa, thanks for the reminder, I remember seeing something about it but forgot its on tonight.

Gill, well done aiming to do the race for life. I am thinking of doing a sponsored bike ride but not til May. Hopefully my fitness will be in a better place then.

Well the children are due home any minute so its about to get chaotic in the house.

Have a lovely evening

Linda
x

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Hi all November ladies.
i haven’t posted for ages but have been reading your comments whilst mopping my eyes. I too have finished my chemo and am starting letrozole next week. The tax hit me harder than the fec, the worst thing being the watering eyes which are dripping all over the keyboard as I write this. How long will it last? I am nervous about starting the letrozole as one of the side effects can be thinning of or hair loss and I just want mine back, fed up with looking like an egg. I know we shouldn’t complain if these various tortures inflicted upon us are keeping us alive, but I can’t believe I will ever look attractive again, and am feeling sorry for myself. My MX and reconstruction hurts like hell too feels like I am in the grips of a boa constrictor. Thats it moaning over, I know some of you have had much worse SE,s than me and have coped brilliantly. Well done and keep posting!
love Gingerrizzie

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Hello Ladies,
Well, the counselling went ok, altho she told me she was more of a psychiatrist than a counsellor, as counsellors just sit and let you do all the talking, but she would also offer advice, etc. To be honest, I didn’t really feel it benefited me because I had the same discussion as I have with my friends, when I’m having a good day (which I was yesterday). At the end, she told me that I was very realistic/positive, which I am, I know that. It’s only when I’m in the midst of those horrid SEs a few days after chemo that I feel very down (as is the norm if you’re poorly sick - regardless of the cause). The only thing that would make me feel better is if someone told me that the cancer has been dealt with, and I’ll never ever ever get it again. But nobody has a crystal ball, and no-one can ever tell you that. Ildiki (that was her name) said that it may help me to think what I WOULD do should that ever happen. I said, hmm, I suppose so. But privately, I thought, 'not bloody likely! I’ll cross that bridge IF I ever came to it, thank you very much!! Life is too short to think about what ifs - I could get run over by a bus tomorrow, and what a waste it will have been spending time stressing about what MIGHT happen sometime in the future! I might see her again when I’m having my mx - coz I’ve not thought too much about that. Maybe it’s sticking my head in the sand, I don’t know. But I need to get this darned chemo over with first! Another 3 to go (yes, I know I keep harping on about it, lol).
I’m not fretting about the mx (yet!!) coz I know I have to have it, so there’s no point worrying about it right now. Plus, as to the op itself, lots of other ladies have said its nothing compared to the nasty SEs of chemo, and, I know that the pain will be less tomorrow than it was today (well, hopefully!)
My next chemo is on Monday, and I’m really not looking forward to it, but this time, I’ll not take 2 Syndol before I go! It was a big mistake last time, and I spent 5 hours nodding on and off with a that horrid cold cap on, dripping wet down my neck, weighing a ton. I just wanted to lie down on a bed. Has everyone else now had their last chemos? Do you know, L4W? I know Jude’s was having them weekly, not sure when she finishes, and Lisa, what about you? Weren’t you having 8 too?
Lulu, I hope your rads is going ok? I’m sorry, it’s so hard to keep up with everyone - who else is now due for rads?
And Weme and KTF, I hope you are bothe recovering well after surgery!
Gill, well done for doing the Race for Life! But make sure you take your time! I’d love to take part too, but will be having my mx about then. My daughter and I did a Midnight Walk last year for our local hospice, and it was great fun, tho I didn’t practice as much as I should have, and got a couple of nasty blisters, lol. And how is your hair, now you’ve finished chemo? Did you get away with not having the bald patch on top? I actually went to see the psychiatrist yesterday wearing nothing on my head, and just had a side parting (ish - my hairs curly, and is a very messy), and you couldn’t tell. So that’s good. But coz I have another THREE (just in case you didn’t know, lol) I’m not sure how much damage that nasty Tax will do! And I fear they will put paid to my eyebrows and lashes which are just about hanging in there.
Gingerizzie, So sorry to hear your MX is causing you gip. How long ago was it when you had it done? :frowning: and those dripping eyes sound a right pain. I wish I knew what to suggest.
Linda, those cold sores up your nose sound really painful. Again, I have no answers, but have you been to a pharmacist or asked your BCN what you could use? It won’t help that you’ve got a rotten cold so will have to keep blowing it :frowning:
I’m fed up with falling asleep every night at about 8pm, like an old dear, no matter how hard I try and stay awake. This fatigue is awful. I only had insomnia for about 3 days after my first chemo. I’m off to see The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel tonight, so my friend might have to keep giving me a dig in the ribs every now and then. Mind you, saw Woman In Black at the weekend, and manged to stay awake for that. It was great, really creepy!
Sorry about the length of this post. Thought I’d best make the most of it before that chemo truck hits me again next week.
Kym xx

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Hi All

I am doing well after my MX and ANC, I have booked to go have it drained tomorrow as I seem to be turning into a water bed and it’s getting a bit tight around the wound now, I’m a bit worried as they said when I go back they will remove the plaster but hopefully that will be OK. I have an appointment with the surgeon next week to get path results.

Gingerrizzie you can get drops for your eyes if they are running, apparently it is because they are dry! the drops do help but you wouldn’t have thought they were dry the way they run all over the place!

I will be having rads starting probably end of March if I heal ok, I will be having them every other day over 5 weeks, I would have prefered to have them over 3 weeks and get it over and done with but this is what the onc is recommending so I guess we have to hope they know what they are talking about.

Liz, fantastic news about your scan, glad it’s all OK.

Hope everyone else is doing OK.

Weme