Hi, I found a swelling and lump in my left breast before Christmas and waited until after my period to see if it went away, it didn’t. I went to the GP who said thought it felt like a small cyst as it was moveable and wanted me to wait another ten days to see if it went. I went back after ten days and it was a different gp I saw who said it again felt like a cyst but she would refer me to the breast clinic urgently. My appointment is this Tuesday 3rd Feb and I am so scared that I just feel like running away and not going. I have been worrying myself sick for weeks and now have pain under my arm and through to my back so am convincing myself it is breast cancer and has spread. I also have prominent veins on the breast with the lump and have read that it could mean a tumour is growing. I know that it could be just a cyst or hormonal, I am 51 and still having periods but think I must surely be approaching menopause sometime soon and it could be connected to that, but I also know it could be cancer and just feel so overwhelmed with thoughts that I have got it and am going to die. I just keep thinking about my children and am trying so hard to keep things together so that they don’t notice anything is wrong but am not doing very well at that. My husband is not helping at all and telling my I am probably just being paranoid and to pull myself together so I feel I have no support at all from him and will attend the appointment alone. I have friends who have offered to come with me but it would mean them taking time off work and l don’t want to ask them to do that. I feel like such a coward when I read the posts from women on here who have actually been diagnosed and seem to be coping so well and I am just a wreck at the moment. Janey x
Janey,
I’m so sorry to hear you are having a tough time. It’s awful trying to keep a lid on all those feelings. Best to have a rant and a good cry - and you’ve come to the right place because we have all felt something like that.
I hope that your experience at the Breast Clinic will bring peace of mind. I found the kindness and expertise of the staff really reassuring.
I don’t know if I can express this in a way that will be helpful, but not all breast pain is as a result of cancer and not all cancer is a total wreck of your whole life. The most important thing is to have it investigated, diagnosed and a plan of treatment, whatever is at the bottom of it.
There will be lots of people here on here thinking positive thoughts for you Tuesday.
J
Hi janey14
As well as the support you receive here do give the BCC helpline a call on 0808 800 6000. Here you can share your worries and concerns with a member of staff who will offer you a listening ear as well as emotional support and practical information. Lines are open weekdays 9 to 5pm and Saturday 10 to 2pm.
Best wishes Sam, BCC Facilitator
Hi newey47 and welcome to the BCC forums
I am sure your fellow users will continue to be a great help to you during this difficult time, in addition please feel free to call our helpliners for further practical and emotional support on 0808 800 6000. Lines are open 9-5 weekdays and 10-2 Saturdays
Here’s a link to the just diagnosed area of the site where you will find lots of information and further support ideas which I hope you will find helpful:
breastcancercare.org.uk/diagnosis
Take care
Lucy BCC
Just checking in to say hi to everybody and send virtual hugs. Thought I’d share some humour with you all. Perhaps a bit on the black side! After lots if searching. I finally found s very comfy sports bra to support my ample H cup boob after lumpectomy etc and was so impressed I bought two more. Next day results indicate that double mastectomy may be on the cards,so not much use for them really, lol. Wonder if that’s grounds for a refund?! Not so sure the expensive cut and colour was very worthwhile either, as chemo also likely. Well if you didn’t laugh you’d cry, or at least have a meltdown (i’m good at those but surpassed myself recently in the Sainsbury’s car park, when I forgot where I’d parked and thought the car had been stolen!). Booby brain mode as I call it xx