Yeah, with this thing you lose control of just about everything. It can be so frustrating.
Me, I haven’t felt like not eating - not yet. Mind, I’m just on my first cycle. I’m trying to eat things with plenty of iron and protein. Make sure I eat some sort of meat every day. I’m hoping that will help with the red blood cells. I had thought once the kids had got settled in to school and the routine, I would start going to the gym at least one morning a week and go swimming, too. Well, that is out the window. The last five days I’ve been too tired or weak to do much of anything besides the school run. I think today I might be feeling not-so-tired again. But this morning I had to admit that just a bit too much hair was in my comb and brush for it to be normal. Day 13 and my hair is definitely starting to go. I’m not ready for the shave yet, but it can’t be too long off. I got a bit emotional. That surprised me, as I’ve been very matter-of-fact about it. I think when I have it shaved off, I am going to cry. I didn’t think I would until this morning.
There is a Disney Store in the Bon Accord Centre in Aberdeen. It is in the corner, next to Woolworths. We get lots of presents for the kids there. Son is into Cars big time, and daughter loves any of the princesses. Every now and then I get something for myself, and hubby has got me pjs or shirts there, too. I’ve been to Disney World in Florida twice, the last time ten years ago. The kids are just about at the perfect age. I had thought maybe next year we’d go, but we’ll have to see how the treatment comes along. We wouldn’t have gone before the October break anyhow. Or we might have decided to wait another year or two. We try to go to the US once a year to see my family. Most of them live in Indiana (hence the Hoosier in my screen name), which is a good distance from Florida/Orlando. I do have a sister who lives near St. Augustine in the northeast of the Florida, though.
I hope they find that primary soon and can get on with treating you.
It was on the 13th day my hair started falling out too (I too had AC - which just finished yesterday). By another 5-6 days I had a big bald round bit on top of my head and it was getting bald behing my ears. I too dreaded shaving it but one day just woke up and knew that was the day - got my oh to do it. The tears were streaming down my face the whole time and I didnt look at it until after he had gone home. Some days its worse looking in the mirror than others but I just try to keep myself feeling feminine with make up etc.
Have you heard about the look good feel better course they run at ARI - if not speak to your bc nurse about it and she will give you a number to book on it. Basically its a make up course with lots of hints and tips (if you are into that) which is run by the cosmetic industry with ladies coming from various counters of boots and debenhams. And the best thing is you come away with a goody bag full of make up from cleanser right up to lipstick, eyeliner etc etc.
As far as the chemo thing goes - I too used to go to the gym 4 times a week but gave up my membership when al this started as I did not have the energy. When I do feel ok I have walks along the beach with my ipod on which is really therapeutic. But you sound like you are doing the right thing by listening to your body - thats the best thing you can do.
I’m sorry your comb is bringing news you’d rather not get thankyouvery much
You are further along the healing route than me, so I don’t know how that feels yet …but there’s no doubt this hair loss is a downer for sure… better to cry than bottle it up though… have you a close friend who can be right beside you at these wobbly times? The breastcare help line organises buddy’s so you can speak to your own buddy on the phone…someone who’s been there and done that and got lots of tips and strategies… and possibly even the T-shirt.
Step by step… if you are tired rest up, or watch a feelgood film even if you doze off during it… go gently with yourself - you are doing a great job coz healing is hard work = even for us women well used to hardwork and multi-tasking!
Glad you told me about the DIsney shop - guess where I’ll be going first next time I’m in aberdeen :))
America must seem very far away at times. My aunt lives in Saudi and although I can send emails through my cousin…I know it’s not the same as a family hug and you have a big family so it must be mighty tough at times for you especially if you are putting on a brave voice for them over the phone.
Keep planning that holiday, it’s something good to look forward to. I’m going back to Venice with my daughter next year - we went 8yrs ago and I didn’t go on a gondola …so this time I will!
Mary
hope all is getting easier with you…
just wanted to add best wishes before I head south for the MRI+biopsy that will hopefully say my primary is in the breast…this certainly takes us to the edge of wq1`2
I had my planning appointment for radiotherapy yesterday and now have a right breast covered with black felt tip pen and three virtually invisible tattoos - hope they can find them on the 29th when I go for my first session!
The oncologist still doesn’t have any info on my hormone status and says I may not really need the Tamoxifen - he feels the side effects may outweigh the benefits - my feeling is " If there are benefits, I want them!" but I did read that radiotherapy prevents Tamoxifen from working so I’m not sure what to do - think I will continue until I get back to see my surgeon on January.
Two weeks until our first grandchild is due - my other half has been sanding and varnishing my old cot for when they come to visit - my parents would have been so proud (it was my cot and we used it for both our daughters) - doctor says 2/5ths engaged so things seem to be progressing well - now just have to hope that their financial details haven’t been leaked by the government!!!
