Morning Ladies
I have been a member of this site since my original BC two years ago, I have followed discussions and found alot of comfort, however I have not posted often as I found it quite hard to talk during my last treatment, I ended up very very depressed due to dx and treatment it’s a long story …
Anyway on Wed I was told I have a new primary in the other breast and I am booked for 2nd mastectomy next Wed. This time I am strangley calm, but really angry because I begged them to do a bilateral mastectomy last time, but was told by the BCN, my biggest worry was about it coming back some where else and not the other breast LOL!!
Also I had to ring the breast clinic because I had not received a date for my annual mammo, so it ended up been 6 weeks late! The BC then wasn’t picked up on the mammo, but on a US because I had felt a thickening in the breast.
This is a different type and I was offered a lumpectomy but have opted for the mx.
Last time I had chemotherapy first, so this is new to me, have not seen the onc yet but surgeon has said he thinks I will have chemotherapy. Gutted because it made me so ill last time, I was admitted 4 times.
I think I need some positive experiences and lots of cyber hugs!
Also does anyone know how long, is the longest time between op and chemotherapy because have a summer holiday booked and can’t face telling the kids we are not going again, feels like de javu
Any way I have gone on enough
Thanks for listening
M x
Hi jamok
I’m sorry to read of your recurrence, its sounds like you are having a pretty tough time at the moment. I’m sure the users of this site will be along to support you soon.
In the meantime maybe you would like to talk to a member of our helpline staff who are there to offer emotional support as well as practical information. The free phone number is 0808 800 600 and the lines are open Monday to Friday 9.00 to 5.00 and Saturday 9.00 to 2.00.
Best wishes Sam, BCC Facilitator
Sending you loads of cyberhugs. I can’t answer your question about time between op and chemo as I’ve had mine the other way round. Had chemi first and just has my mastectomy on 1st June. I asked my surgeon on Wednesday if I needed a double mastectomy and he said there was no reason for it.
I’m getting anxious that I wont be finished rads by the time I’ve booked our summer holidays too.
I hope you get some answers and reassurance soon.
Love and hugs
Polly xxxx
The NICE guidelines say chemo should start within 31 days of last surgery, but they like to ensure you’ve healed nicely before starting on chemo because chemo can slow down healing.
Thanks for your replies cyber hugs accepted x
Thanks choccie muffin, well that scuppers that!
What’s the longest any one has gone?
Thanks M
I didn’t start chemo until 7 weeks after surgery due to healing problems then bloods showing problems needing CT and bone scans, and others have opted to delay for a few weeks for family reasons - guess it depends when your holiday is planned in relation to the date of surgery, but a few weeks delay won’t be impossible.
Iamok,
Sorry to hear your news, horrid for you. I have just started chemo after a 7 week gap from my last surgery. Had WLE and 2 further re-excisions. I raised the timing issue with my oncologist and they seemed fairly relaxed about timings.
Obviously they will try and follow the NICE guidelines, but I think they will be flexible within reason to fit with YOUR life and plans.
I guess it would depend what your plans are? Trekking in Nepal probably wouldn’t work, but seaside in the UK might??.. would it be possible to start chemo and have the holiday in the down cycle?
I would suggest you talk it over with your oncologist or bcn.
Good luck with whatever you do.
Wandyx
Hi There,
so sorry to see that you have to go through it all again. It’s so unfair. I had a new primary in the other breast 7 years after my first bc. I too had asked for a double mastectomy the first time, they did not refuse but convinced me it was not necessary…(good treatment, hormone therapy, regular monitoring etc) Any way just to say I had op then chemo both times and both times I went on holiday during chemo. 10 days after the treatment and then had the following treatment 4 weeks after instead of the usual 3 weeks. I too did not want to let my family down. Now over a year later I am here to tell the tale and doing well.
Good luck xx
Hello & Sorry you find yourself here again!! Was you first BC of lobular type? They have an increased risk of coming back in the other side compared to ductal. I went 9 weeks from mx to Chemo due to a stubborn seroma. Wishing you all the best!!x
Hi
No my first was ductal, they have said this is a completely different type, just got the appointments for all my scans, feeling pretty scared. But sat out in the sunshine with the kids who are having great fun on the water slide.
Just told my mum and brothers and sisters, I am the youngest of 6 and we are all really close, phew that was hard!
hi there I too share your fate 2 times new primary other side …14 year gap!!! holiday booked the whole 9 yards of dram!! I am half way through chemo and as long as I stay on track I will finish that then go on holiday ( bin saving 3 years taking kids to florida, they are 7&9 we have never had a holiday unless you count 2 weekends camping) then mx/recon then rads??? I am still holding onto the holiday dream and don’t you let yours slip away just yet!! make sure you let them know you had to cancel out on your kids last time …it sucks doesn’t it all the if’s and maybe’s!!! the goalposts kept shifting for a while untill all the results ect were in,… don’t give up the dream unless you REALLY have to I won’t!!! Jeanette xxxx
Hi
This is my first post. I had my first primary in 2000 age 33 have just been diagnosed with new primary in other side. Will be having bilateral mastectomy which the docs think is a good idea. I have also been quite calm about it although I feel like the unluckiest person ever and feel realy bad having to put my family through this again. 4 teenagers!!! I have planned all the treatment so far around the summer hols as I couldnt bear to change the plans.
Hope all goes well
C
Hi Jeanette
I am trying to hang on to the holiday my kids are so exited, we are going with the rest of the family, and it’s all they talk about.
I had my chemotherapy before surgery last time and felt ok a couple of weeks after chemotherapy, so you hang on to your dream, the kids will love it.
My emotions are all over but all I can think of is the sadness in their eyes last time, it haunted me all the way through treatment. I have worked really hard to make sure my kids are happy, as I lost my mum as a child and I can’t bear the thought of it happing to them
Luv M x
Hi M
i had BC in 2006 and then a new primary in 2009 and it was a different type… the first one was a grade 1 hormone pos and the second was was a grade 3 triple neg (hormone neg).
i had a lumpectomy both times, although requested a bilateral Mx at 2nd diagnosis but was advised that wasnt neccessary, however iv since found out i carry the BRCA2 gene mutation and now gonna have double Mx next year.
i had WLE on 21st may and chemo 25th june… exactly 5 weeks after my surgery.
good luck
Lulu
Hiya
I’ve been told today that I have a primary in my other side. I was first diagnosed December 2009 and through a long story, (starting from an optician noticing a lazy eye last July!) they found some secondaries, mainly in my liver. I was put on a drugs trial, given a PET scan which showed some active areas in my right breast and armpit, which was biopsied, and I was given the result this morning. My original, on the left side, was triple positive and treated accordingly, and my drugs trial used Herceptin, but this one is HER2 negative interestingly. Looks like there’ll be an op but the doc will call me later on once he and his team have scratched their heads a bit.
The eye thing was first picked up in July 2010 which means I am thinking the right breast was there around the same time but never showed up on mammagram, or as a palpable lump. All feels very bizarre but am clinging to the positives. I am interested to hear about other people with similar experiences - bilateral seems to be more common than the docs care to admit. Mine muttered today about people getting twitchy and opening up a new can of worms!!
Vicky
hi vicky
bilateral cancer is very rare around 5% however about 40% in those with gene mutations.
since i posted my last post i have been diagnosed with recurrence in my left side in the pectoral muscle lymph nodes. the biopsy showed that an area of this new tumour appears to have been previously treated so it could be that this has been their since i was first diagnosed with the 2nd cancer in 2009 but didnt show on mammo.
think my team are also scratching their heads a bit and have my appt on tues to find out what the plan is but looks like surgery in the first instance.
keep me posted.
Lulu xxx
hi, my original diagnosis was back in 2000 left breast, I had a wle, chemo and rads,
then:
November 2010 diagnosed again new primary right breast, insisted on mx this time, also rads and chemo,
I really wanted a double mx but my surgeon wouldnt do it!!! he has agreed to do it at a later date, probably early part on next year,
why didnt he just do the bi-lateral? I have been tested for braca1 and 2 all ok. I just dont know how I could face chemo again, if it came back for a 3rd time…
I am really going to push for further surgery at my next appt, does anyone know on what grounds, apart from the fact my left breast appears to be healthy at the moment, they may refuse to do the surgery.
I must add that on both occasions I discovered the lumps myself mammograms completely missed them both.
I was originally diagnosed with two lumps in my left breast in April 2008. I had chemo then a LD flap mastectomy followed by radio. My husband was fantastic during my treatment and was a real rock for me.
He walked out on me in May this year for another woman.
I was diagnosed with BC in my right breast in July 2011 had another LD flap and now have been told I have to have chemo. I am waiting to see my oncologist for full details.
I still cannot believe my husband is not with me and am finding the broken heart harder to deal with than the cancer. Maybe they are just muddled up into one as I am sure he left me as I was too needy after the cancer.
I have a 12 year old son who is struggling with his dad not living with us any more as well as worrying about the cancer. I am trying to support him but it is all getting too much
Has anyone else lost their love before their treatment?
“I am sure he left me as I was too needy after the cancer”
No, love, he left you because he is weak. My first OH left me because he couldn’t cope with one of his kids being special needs and his new woman didn’t have kids and was carefree. He told me that he didn’t want heavy responsibilities. But she’s had 2 kids with him now and one is, guess what? Special Needs again. Similar problems; it must be in his genes so he can’t get away from it now.
Some men are weak and can’t cope with anything that isn’t an easy life.
It’s awful having to support kids through a breakup, especially when they are at the difficult puberty stage, and all you really need is someone to support YOU.
Sorry to hear that you are on your own with all this rubbish. There are quite a lot of single women coping on their own maybe you could start a thread to find them so you could support each other?
Big hugs from someone who has been there.
Oh nats Iv just read your post. My daughters dad left me for another woman when she was 18 months old and in a lot of debt as he was a gambler. 10 years later my husband and father of my then 7 yr old son left me for another woman on 3 occasion the final time was the last straw when he kicked me across the room. But I was devastated at my marriage being over.
When I got cancer the first time in 2006 I was a single mum for the second time and used to cry myself to sleep at night not over having cancer but because he wasn’t there to support me through it. But I had to keep reminding myself that if he was still here he would have been moaning that my crying was waking him when he had to get up for work.
I then met my OH 18 months later and he moved in with me and I got a second BC 20 months later in may 2009. He was very supportive for the first 6 months while I was going through treatment but then had redundancy hanging over him which made him really reclusive and uncommunicative for months eventually I asked him to move out In January but we were still engaged and seeing each other regularly.
Two days before I was diagnosed with my recurrence last month I found out he had been cheating on me too. I was way more devastated about the end of my relationship than the cancer. Just cannot understand what I do to deserve it all. Very hard to see positives but I am a positive person and I have a wonderful family and friends who I know will help me through my forthcoming treatment. Doesn’t stop me waking up in the night or crying my eyes though… we are only human after all.
Much love Lulu xxxxx