ups and downs
ups and downs I have her 2 positive, her 2 negative and thrombocythemia, I have finished chemo, undergone mastecomy with partial reconstruction and have started hercepton, My reconstruction has gone wrong, partly I feel due to my low imune system and am to lose this breast again tomorrow. My 8 year old son has had dreadful behaviorial problems, due to a masty divorce and my cancer and my current boyfriend and family seem to think now I am “over theworst” I should be euphoric now, instead I am so tearful, cannot see the way forward and am so tired of the constant fight I have had, I feel so selfish and know I need to be upbeat for my son, but it is so hard. I say things I dont mean and just want to be left alone. Although I feel stronger my body wont let me do the things I want to and thats so frustrating. I want to feel “normal” have energy and back to the social world, but I cant. Does other people feel like this? do I need a kick up the backside to get going? I feel I am about to lose my boyfriend who has supported me all the way through but is struggling with the new me, last year I lost my job, my home and my life through cancer and I dont want it to beat me. any suggestions?
Helpline/Peer Support Dear George123
Sorry to read that you are feeling this way at the moment. You are welcome to contact our helpline for support on 0808 800 6000 Monday to Friday 9am-5pm and Saturday 9am-2pm.
You may also be interested in our ‘Peer support’ service which offers one to one support from someone who has had experience of breast cancer and we do our best to match you with someone of similar experience to you so that you are able to speak to someone who has an understanding of how you may be feeling. You can find out more from the homepage of the website or the helpline staff will be able to provide with details of this and our other support services which may be of interest to you.
Kind regards
Forum Host
Breast Cancer Care
Only be kind to yourself- you’ve taken such a battering. Eat as well as you can- fresh food, fruit 'n veg, oily fish and get enough sleep- have a rest when son’s at school.
Forcing your reluctant body into action will just slow down your return to normal life.
Much sympathy and best wishes, dilly
ups and downs Poor you, you sound as though you have really been through the mill.
I think the emotional impact of this disease is just has hard as the physical. I was told I would need to take a year out of my life for the chemo surgery radiotherapy etc and I feel that after the treatment has finished it takes quite a while (everybodys different) for you to catch up emotionally and come to terms with everything you have been through.
You need to be really kind to yourself.
As far as family and friends are concerned I think they are desperate to get the old you back and they just want things to be normal and this can sometimes make you feel as though they have forgotten what you’ve been through and unless you’ve been on this journey they will never really understand and can only empathise.
I think my advice would be to try and take one day at a time really enjoy when you have a good day and when you are feeling low try and accept that it is part of the healing process. Try and have a good healthy balanced diet and to get some fresh air every day and most importantly do something really nice that you enjoy everyday!!!
Good luck and lots of love
Lesley x