Waiting is driving me mad

I go for my results tomorrow, to see if the cancer has spread to my lymph glands. I have been really positive until now, but I am starting to feel really worried all of a sudden. My breast cancer nurse rang today to see how I am getting on. At the end of the conversation she asked if I was OK and when I said yes, but tomorrow will be the telling time she responded in the usual sympathetic voice. I am starting to get really paranoid, as when I put the phone down I kept thinking - Does she know something? Why did she sound so sympathetic? I know they always do normally and I am probably reading too much in to it, but the waiting is driving me crazy. I usually try and look on the bright side, but for some reason, today it has been really hard.

Julie.

Hi Julie

Yep the waiting does drive us crazy doesnt it. Being paranoid is normal too, I felt like the BCN was hiding stuff from me too. Fingers and toes crossed for you tomorrow and I’m sending loadsa positive vibes your way. What time is your appt? I’ve to wait until next Thursday and my parents have taken the kids for the week so I’m very very bored sitting on my fat bum taking it easy. Something I’ve never never done before. I’m usually running around keeping children and friends entertained during the holidays.
Good luck, all will be well

love Vanessa

HI Julie,
I had a WLE sentinel node and axillery sampling on the 25th july and like everyone here know the worst part is the waiting , i got my results last thursday and good news my nodes were clear which was such a relief, my lump was 2.3cm and unfortunately grade 3 which is apparently the most aggressive so will now proberly have chemo before 5 weeks rads,i still havent had the results back on the hormone receptor test so waiting on that one .Im waiting now to see the onc watching the post for the appointment they said within 2 weeks (another anxious wait) but like you have tried to keep positive.The breast nurses are great and always sympathtic so try not to read to much into that. Youve done the first bit now so keep positive youll feel better when you know your treatment plan . Good luck for tomorrow and please let us know how you get on.
lots of hugs
lindiloo

Thanks

I am going to bed now and will try to sleep!

Love.

Julie.

I logged on this morning to send you good luck and find this post. I hope all goes well today and after going through what you have already been through you will get through this. I think the waiting and not knowing is definetly the worst as we are in limbo not being able to make plans. Like you I have worked all my life and had very little time off work -so not being able to plan, and make our own decisions feels like we are out of our comfort zone - out of control.
I am not going to say it will be alright because as we all know that does not happen with bc. we have entered into the unknown and you will deal with whatever is thrown at you.
I will be unable to get to a pc until Thurdsay evening but I will be thinking of you and sending hug cyber hugs.

There is a thread on living with bc called the Door. This is so true.

Good morning Julie and Good LUCK…

Good luck Julie

I felt the same about my BCN and kept asking my OH if she knew more and wasn’t telling me. Can fully understand how you feel.

Hope you are feeling strong and OK today, and keeping everything crossed for you.

Love
Dawn
x

Hi Julie,
Just wanted to join all the other well wishers for today!

I have got to wait till wednesday to find out if it has spread to my Liver!

Hope all goes well
TC
Mel
x

You have my love and good wishes as well!

God bless.

Christay

When I read some of the letters on here I could cry. I am considering myself soooo lucky in comparison with a lot you. I am 60 now and just had Lumpectomy and Lymph node removal as a result of mammogram. Mine was so tiny only 6mm and confirmed as Grade 1 and last weeks results show no spread to lymph nodes. I will have hormone and radiotherapy treatment.

How you younger people cope I don’t know,especially when you have young children and my admiration goes to you all. you are amazing and like all other comments you must stay positive and take each day as it comes. My inspiration comes from my mother in law who had mastectomy 2 years ago at the age of 73 , she also has parkinsons, but she is still the same battle axe she was before ( thank god). Also my aunt who had the same 14 years ago and is perfectly fine now. So remember we do survive and it may be a long road but hey at the end of the day what cost a life?
It is a pity though that mammograms aren’t available readily for the unders as I am amazed how many younger prople are diagnosed.
Good luck and just take anything they throw at you, it could be a lifesaver!

Love to all

Norma