Wide awake after midnight club !

At 2am this morning …hubby was coughing and it made me think we need a thread for when we are all awake.
Most times its the worst for our dark thoughts and fears and hopefully by posting here …Someone else will link up and rant too and help release the thoughts that are keeping us awake at silly o clock.

Great idea , xxx

Good idea Carolyn ?

Hugs Janette xx

Great idea I usually wake up about 2.30ish start to think of daft things or days actions at hospital who said what did I listen right.

:smileyfrustrated: xxx

Good morning
I actually managed to sleep a bit but have woken up much to early
Writing in the dark on my phone is very challenging with my fat thumbs but I am giving it ago
I am telling myself as I write this that today I am not going to think of " whole thing " as I will just go off my head , I am just going through it bit by bit day by day ,
It has taken me almost a week to try and get my mind over seeing the Doc . I am not to good with medical stuff and I asked questions to try and understand this.nasty better,i wish I never asked the question ,
Wishing you all well

Hello ladies …hope it helped a bit being able to share thoughts at silly o clock.
I think we all worry about leaving our loved ones as most of us as women are the lynch pin that keeps everything tickity boo with organising etc.
The only positive thing I can think of is that this disease gives time for our loved ones to accept the situation but if we had a fatal heart attack or got hit by a bus …plans would not be in place etc.
We all lay awake pondering dark thoughts and thinking " why me"have I done something horrible to deserve all this but they say only the good die young and maybe that’s true when they are murderers and child molesters out there enjoying healthy long lives .
Keep visiting here ladies and maybe just maybe it will help off load some worries.
Carolyn ???

I will not surprise anyone Carolyn if I say that I have been overwhelmed with such kind of thoughts recently. I do not have major symptoms luckily up to now, but at times a feel like I am watching a movie, me being the main character…

I do not have kids, and will never have because of my ER+ cancer. So there is not any youngster to worry about. I live only with my husband, I meet with my mum and dad and brother only once a year and they are not aware of my diagnosis yet. I have only one best friend, who does not live in the UK. But I love life!!!I sleep well, hope that this is going to stay the same, but I feel so down at the moment, I want to do so many things, I need to see so many places before I go…

I pray that God will give me the time, strenght and health to do as many as possible and to find cure for that unfair disease. Sorry that I post in this thread, I am luckily sleeping well, apart from a lot of weeing at night, but I just felt that it is not fair to start a new thread only because I am drinking and feeling poor at the moment

Hi all
We are all going through such hard times ,
I don’t know any of you but we are kindred spirits trying our very best to get through all of this with our heads held high , members of the same club but as Groucho Marx once said
" I don’t want to be a member of a club which has me as a member "
Momo , I understand where you are coming from and see you are fighting for your boys tooth and nail but you can only do your best try not be to hard on yourself , as you need to look after yourself as well
Ariella I think you are in the right place to post ,though I am only new to this surreal life i am now in , we are here to be friends and support each other , I think all of us are up one minute and down the next and also not just wanting to get through this but wish to be living through it as well ,
A big thank you from me to all our community champions ,Carolyn , Barton , Marirose and all others , for all of the help and kindness you give ,and every member everywhere ,

Kindest regards
Marcelle xxx

Ladies …glad u are enjoying this thread and can upload some of your fears and dark thoughts .
It’s ironic I started it as I never take my phone/ tablet to bed at night …usually silent from ten ish to the morning.!!

Hello bonieres
Sorry about the spelling …Sorry about your back …feel bit guilty if all the driving to Bristol and back on Saturday has flared it up as it was a long drive for you.
It was so nice to meet you though.
Ashamed to admit on this thread …slept for eight hours last night …no wee or active brain up setting it !!! It’s not a regular thing though.
Still sure that my glass of tonic water before bedtime does help …don’t know of any medical or proven fact but works for me ( well sometimes )
Carolyn xxx

Ha ha …yes but hooray its better today …thought everyone would laugh …but it hurt yesterday all day …can’t think what caused it !!
If it rains today …my fault I’ve got a 2nd load of washing twirling in machine …AAGH ironing for me later !!
Lovely to meet you.
Carolyn xxxx

Went to bed last night …tired and had clean sheets but still woke up at 2am …not having dark thoughts but having a panic whether I had enough wool to finish the teddy bear jumper I’m knitting for my grand daughters build a bear …the over acting brain but hey ho …will pop to shop and buy some more wool …problem solved …
Carolyn xxx

Hi Barton,


yes, been catching up on here a bit, but going to have a biscuit, do my injection and cuddle up under the covers.xx


 hope you get off to sleep soon. I try to repeat a prayer/ mantra over and over in my head, till my brain gets bored, but have only had about 5 hours sleep nightly latelyxx




I too was awake but didn’t have my phone upstairs with me to post …wish I had as I could have joined you all.
Sooo…I looked out the window at a big Fox wandering about outside … ( we live in town not country side) and then I looked at my new little car parked outside ( don’t use garage as its hubbys man cave) and felt smug as its small and cute …called her Tilly … all I need to do now is drive again after a year !!
Meet you all here again another night .
Carolyn xxx

Ps …shopping channels are very dangerous as at 2am you can easily convince yourself you can’t live without a steam mop or ice cream maker and spend !! been there and done that.

Well here we are ladies …I’m sat on my deck drinking coffee …and its only 5.41 new time.
I’m not asleep because I don’t want to be though but sons dog thought it nice that he woke me up early …having a six stone boxer dog sat on u gives u no choice …sooo he’s had his early morning dump …and his breakfast …so what do I do now at silly o clock ? Answers on a postcard please !!!

I had a lovely sleep last night…first one in ages!


some things that help me are Paracetamol…two does help. Breathing in and out very slowly and deeply whilst repeating a mantra or prayer in my head.  A late snack of car s…biscuit.


Hope things go well for all of us tonight.


Hi - I used to post on these forums regularly but don’t so much now, although I do read the ones related to SBC most days, especially the ‘bones mets’

I have been on letrozole and stable for four years now since primary dx - followed six weeks later with Dx of secondaries.

last time I saw onc he made next appointment for six months time - which will be early March.  He did say to get in touch before should I have any concerns.  The BCN also said when I was leaving that she was always on the end of the phone if I had any concerns.  My GP is pretty good as well.

i have not been a good sleeper since Dx and like most of us it is when we can’t sleep that our minds run away with worries.

i just discovered this thread so thought I’d post and see if it helps.

i have a headache for almost 2 days now, paracetamol aren’t helping, I tell myself it is sinus or the start of a head cold.

i also have a very achey hip and pain down my leg, I generally take one  naproxen morning and evening but have told myself I will take two tomorrow morning, (I had on with my dinner at 6.00pmish) don’t want to take one now because I will need to have something to eat with it and I am not at home - staying over at my daughter’s house, I am on babysitting duty tomorrow whilst she snd her husband are at work.


of course I am also hoping that if I can get some sleep it’ll all feel a lot better in the morning.


sweet dreams to anyone who does manage to sleep






Hiya Lyn
Welcome to our awake club !! It’s so nice to be able to post here when the brain won’t sleep.
I find a glass of tonic water before bed helps me sleep …don’t know the medical reason but it helps with aches and cramps !!
Best of luck with nanny sitting …it’s hard work as probably pre school age and need constant attention.

Hi Carolyn I agree that it is good to have somewhere to ‘go’ when we can’t sleep.  I probably managed 3 or 4 hours last night…but I do feel better this morning I took 2 naproxen with breakfast and the hip pain is much better.  Still have a headache but am now sure it is sinus pain…at 2.00am I was imagining all sorts.

The grandkids are 5 and almost 3.  I walk the eldest to school and then fetch her home.  The little one stays at home with me on a Monday instead of nursery - but he has a good nap midday so I put my feet up then.  I love having them.  I do go home tired but I always sleep well on a Monday night!!!