widowed a year ago

Public Archive
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have just found out i have a lump 6mm seems so trivial for me to worry about whats going to happen after reading what so many of u newly diagnosed r going through, not too sure until i see the surgeon what is going too be done, i’m 54 cared some years for my hubby before he died last year, had just recently decided to start dating & started having a relationship now this, i know i need his support which he has offerred but don’t know if its fair too him, as his wife died from cancer, part of me wants too end the relationship i’m soo confused

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Dont end it you cant decide for him take what he offers.I was widowed over 20 years ago and have since remarried a man who is my rock.Your lump is small give yourself a fighting chance emotionally as well as physically.All the best.Valxx[I remarried 18months after being widowed].

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my partner died 8 years ago and having been friends with some one i new at uni (coo - 30 years back now) we had just got together properly when i was diagnosed last nov … i still have problems about ‘sharing’ how i feel but bless th man’s a sweetie… no throing baby out with bathwater yet iglow - he understands!

and horace/val - good for you!!!

jennifer

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thanks for ur replies val & jennifer, i see what u both mean, also helped me to see that u can still be happy again after losing a partner even if u can’t always share ur feelings about things as u used too.
teresa

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iglow, now is not a good time to make any important decisions - your emotions are probably all over the place (I know mine were!). Anyway the chances are you will have some treatment (has it been def been diagnosed as bc?) and then you will get better and lead a long and happy life. You must believe, especially with such a small lump, that you will get through this. You need each other right now so don’t push him away (I know you are only thinking of him though) and it will also be good for him to see that the treatment WILL work. I would just say that try to be honest with each other - every step of the way - and you will have a much stronger relationship.