a natural bodily function buts its so hillarious. i’ve been feeling really depressed over my cancer and needed a good laugh and now i got one. when i start my chemo maybe i’ll get my own back on my hubby!

When I told my friend about the “wind” and it was the chemo - her reply was well you ain’t been on chemo for the last 50 years !!! The same friend who told me when I was in tears because I was going to shave my head that day - “get up, have a sh**, shower and shave” made me laugh.

I only found out it was sympton of the chemo because of this site otherwise I’d have been thinking it was me !!

Liz xx

I will leave the room if I feel a parp coming on and I am in the company of other people, no matter who it is. But I will confess that if I feel like having a fart when I’m in bed with him, I will part my bum cheeks and that acts like a silencer! (that is a tip I got from a friend who drinks beer, LOL) But I still have to hope he will not move in the next couple of minutes in case a whiff escapes from under the duvet. I know he must have noticed one or two but he is too polite to say anything. I have now admitted to him that chemo makes me fart like a good un.

I’ve never heard of that !!! It made me laugh. I used to (and still do) try to get out of the room before I let one go ! xx

Ladies, thank you so much for making me laugh. I’m sat here with tears rolling down my cheeks - you’ve cheered me up no end.

Better out than in . . . .


What a thread, still laughing at all the images it conjures up.

Best one was when I was in hospital and had the sentinel node biopsy done where they used the dye and when I eventually went to the toilet my poo was green/blue !! Bet that frightened them cos it wouldn’t flush !!! Aliens

Liz xx

Oh girls you have brightened my day. Feeling the fall out from FEC5 last Thursday & pretty sorry for myself, you have cheered me no end (literally). I find that there are 2 main categories. The toot flute and the machine gun. The toot flute tends to play involuntarily when you bend down to pick something up or stroke the dog and of course always happens in front of a work colleague or the Tesco delivery man. The machine gun although can crop up anywhere, at any time, seems to occur more often in bed. My daughters boyfriend (just out the army) actully dived for cover when walking past my room shouting INCOMING!. If you are unlucky enough to have the machine gun, you really need to be on your own. I find it the more embarassing of the two and much harder to control.
Love you all xx

umm, I did a bright green sh1t after my op and I racked my brains for ages wondering what could possibly have caused it, I hadn’t eaten spinach for ages, LOL, and then at my first FEC the nurse warned me that with some of the chemo drugs being bright red my wee would probably be the same colour for a while… then I mentioned the green pooh and she explained it was cos of the dye! It simply didn’t cross my mind, and nobody had thought to warn me!

I never thought a thread on embarrassing bodily functions would cause so much mirth, or end up so many posts!

I have a flatulence story unrelated to chemo if anyone wants a laugh

Go for it Clarabel34

having first FEC thursday, cant decide if i should warn my OH or just let him find out… I havnt laughed so much for ages!! thank girls.Only been with OH for 4 years and always try not to fart in front of him… he says i fart all night ( i say if im asleep it doesnt count) so he has a big shock coming to him.

Be a devil and surprise him!!!
Good luck

OK here goes, I have always avoided breaking wind in front of my partner, apart from what I said about under the duvet and obviously we all agree that whatever happens whilst alseep doesn’t count…

Anyhoo, we were on holiday about 6 months into our relationship, and sitting outside a restaurant and I had had a fart brewing for a while and normally I’d have gone to the ladies’ room and let it out BUT I didn’t actually need to visit for any other reason and frankly I couldn’t be bothered, also it was one of those sensations where you can tell that if you just DO the fart it will not be a noisy one, so as we were sat outside I went for it. What I had failed to register (after about 2 bottles of wine) was that although we were sitting outside they had erected a plastic awning because it was off season and got quite chilly at night… so there was nowhere for the fart to escape and it was possibly the WORST “silent but violent” one I had ever smelt (from myself or anybody else) since we’d been eating loads of fish and garlicky foods all week. Sorry if anyone’s having their elevenses reading this. There was no way my boyfriend would NOT have noticed it, and I couldn’t exactly blame it on a nearby table because with it being off season the place was more than half empty!

We settled the bill and walked outside and he said “that was a nice meal and a nice restaurant I really enjoyed it” and I just blurted “IT WAS MEEEEEEEEEEEE OK??!!” to which he went “hmmmmm I have no idea what you’re talking about babe” and nothing has been said ever since, if he had taken the mickey out of me for 5 minutes I would not have felt so embarrassed.

Anyway, nothing to do with chemo but I’ve had friends in stitches with that confession.

For the record I have only noticed HIM fart about twice in 2 years.

It’s great to be normal isn’t it !!!

I had to have a colonoscopy a few years ago and the hospital sent me a very strong laxative which I duly took at the appropriate time but it didn’t work as soon as it should have. It got me up in the middle of the night and it continued…

My dad was taking me to the hospital and picked me up and half way there I said I need to go to the loo and it’s pouring out of me. He had a newspaper in the back which he quickly shoved underneath me. We got to the hospital and he went in and got me a chair and so I walked alone the long corridor pulling this chair behind me and no doubt leaving a huge stink behind me. I got to the department and told them so had to go and wash myself and then had the procedure done. I was telling the people there and we had a good laugh about it and one bloke said my dad most probably gone home for a trailer to put me in on the way home !!

I hasten to add that my dad’s car didn’t get dirty !!!

Liz xx