worry, worry, worry....

worry, worry, worry…

worry, worry, worry… Hi Girls

I need a kick up the backside, gently please!! Im 7 weeks out of chemo and would be relieved to know if others feel the same.

Ive started Arimadex and Zoladex 5 weeks ago and I have aches and pains in places I didnt know existed. My arms, neck, head, hands and back ache and in a morning it takes me a while to get going, Im only 46 years old and I feel like an 80 year old!

Ive started a new job, only a few hours a week and really thought that I was getting back to some kind of normality, then at the weekend two of my Aunties were very ill and I was asked by a number of my family to help, well I just fell to pieces,the old Debbie would have been in there sorting everything out, but I ended up just sitting and crying on the deckchair outside on Sunday, I felt that the worrying was never going to end and I didnt know how much more I could stand. My head aches sometimes with thinking about things and because there is no answer I just keep going round in circles. Im glad to go to sleep, but then as soon as I wake up its there again.

I also can imagine another lump ‘sneaking’ into the other breast, I really have to stop myself feeling for anything else, my hand automatically
goes to feel a million times a day, (well it feels like that)

Sorry if Ive rambled on, Im usually positive, but I just would like to know if anyone else has these feelings.

Debbie xx

Hang On In There Hi Debbie

Dont worry it is all normal feelings. I went through the same thoughts as you (still do) I do think you have started back to work to soon you need time for yourself now to just chill and pamper yourself. Do not try to do to much and do not be to hard on yourself. The aches and pains do go in time. but it takes a long time months not weeks!!!

Hope this helps you and you are not alone in your feelings.

Hi Debbie I was 50 when I finished chemo and felt (and looked with those horrid grey curls) about 80. However that was in December 2002, and a market researcher seeking 40-somethings to annoy told me recently that I looked a lot younger than my real age of 54. So don’t despair - you will get stronger physically and emotionally.

As for the fear of recurrence - it’s something we all have to come to terms with, but it’s hard. You’ve had all the rotten treatment and they can’t guarantee you’re cured. I became quite obsessive about it and needed counselling to help me manage the fear.

You’re not alone by any means - what you’re feeling is normal, though very unpleasant. It might help to talk to your bc nurse - mine arranged the counselling after I talked to her.

Firbomyalgia I know I keep wittering on about this but Docs are just researching the fact that many women who have had treatment are suffering and it seems it may be fibromyalgia.

Check out UK Fribromyalgia website and see what you think I would be interested to know.

I have been batting on about this for 5 years since I finished my treatment only to be told it was my age and I was not fit - I am 51 and have ridden all my life until last year when I just could not do it anymore !!

You are not alone !!