for Jacki Hi Jacki,
What a tough time you’re having …I do hope your symptoms settle down - sounds like still quite early days and you have the better version! I wasn’t allowed Nolvadex - I guess if I was going to be on it for the long term, I would have fought harder to get it, but I just didn’t have enough fight left in me that day …!
Tamoxifen messed with me terribly (physically and emotionally), but from reading here and elsewhere on the net, and talking to the fantastic nurses about it, it does seem that for most people, the side effects do settle. I certainly hope this will be true for you.
I did feel I was ‘falling apart’, just like you! Physically it was like really bad flu, combined with morning sickness and terrible pain in my legs and bones … I was sick within ten minutes of the first tablet and it was all downhill from there! The GPs were lovely, but they kind of gave up on me ‘getting used to it’! I also had to stop driving as I was very unsafe - kind of ditzy and unfocussed and confused.
It also made me weak, tearful and feeling very silly. I cried all the time for no reason, and then I felt guilty for crying as I really had nothing to cry about, then I would lose all sense of perspective. Even though, obviously, I am actually very lucky! I still have a strong sense of guilt. Most people are far worse off than me. So I felt really stupid for being so pathetic.
Anyway, the aftershocks are easing now and it’s been few days since I fell over and got pinned to the floor in a cold sweat! I’m gradually starting to feel more like ‘me’.
Let us know how you get on - I know it isn’t easy when you’re suffering those kind of side effects. I felt better knowing I wasn’t the only one, and this site helped enormously. Good luck!
love
susie x
Extra Cells! Hi Susie,
Well, in January the far too dishy Senior Registrar was the first person to tell me about this and he just said that the sample had too many cells! Exactly - not helpful. The best bit was though when he said he couldn’t feel my lump (like I couldn’t) but felt it was still there - hidden. That he would consider taking it out, but couldn’t as he had nothing to take out! Hope your following all this:-).
When I first found the lump (this time) it hurt lots. That how I came to find it. But then after the first core biopsies the pain stopped! It has only come back again after the second lot of core biopsies. But I don’t think it is cyclical as it appears worse when I’m stressed or emotional. I don’t think its there all the time, but I am more aware of that side now and it can be painful laying on my front at night. Like you I can’t forget about it. Both time I have found this lump (if it is the same one) it has apperaed over night. That said, however, when I saw my GP this time after I found it, she did say she thought it had been there for at least 6 months:-( But I can’t believe I would have missed it. I don’t think I was overly stressed at the time as although I had only just started in my current job, I was loving every minute of it!
I really feel for you having to decide which option to go for. I really don’t know what I will say in a couple of weeks if they ask me what I want to do - apart from get them to tell me what to do for the best!
Does any of this sound familiar to you?
Lots of Love
Jxxx
Hello Jeanette! Gosh, your post resonated with me! Wish we could mail …
So, you have a lump that isn’t really a lump, the pain is not really cyclical and it gets worse with stress? We’re twins. Maybe!
Mine hurts at night too - I have to kind of shift it around to get comfortable. Sometimes the pain is so bad I wake up.
I saw a different doctor yesterday, and he said I must insist on being referred to the Pain Clinic at the hospital. I’d never heard of that, but will certainly do it.
I am still trying (when I have the energy) to find out what this thing I have is. If I find anything, I’ll be sure to let you know.
I don’t suppose you know if there is such a thing as a breast specialist who deals with this kind of thing? I seem to have exhausted all options at the Screening Unit, but although I am of course profoundly grateful that it’s benign, I am nonetheless left with a debilitating problem. They’ve dumped it under the label ‘fibrocystic’ but I don’t think it is - there is no fibre and no cysts for a start! And I only have the problem in one breast, which also doesn’t fit. I get the distinct impression that ‘fibrocystic’ is an umbrella term, used when they have no other label …
Could we keep each other posted of any progress? Good luck with yours, and keep in touch!
love
susie xx
Twins! Hi again Susie,
Twins eh? Well if we are I’m sorry to say we are not identical! You seem to be in far more pain then I am for starters - poor thing. I know what you mean about getting comfortable at night! But mine doesn’t wake me.
Have you tried Reiki? My physio is trying it on my wrist as he says I’m not healing properly 
which worries me somewhat given what is going on! He is convinced it is helping but to be honest I can’t feel much myself! Still it keeps him happy. After all it pays to keep an open mind. I have had acupuncture and I truely believe that can help some conditions.
I will let you know what happens on Monday week - maybe they will come up with a name! If they ask me what I want them to do I am going to say "tell me go push off and stop wasting your valuable time - lol! Maybe it will work?
Bye for now.
Jxx
Discharged 
Hi all,
Well the day finally arrived and I saw yet another doctor at the hospital. I think that makes 6 different doctors in 6 visits!
Anyway, dispite the fact that my lump is definitely still there, I have been discharged. Yeepee I think! The Doc reckons that although its still there its harder to find and he thinks its shrunk from about 2.5 cms to 1.5 cms. That with the fact that they really think that I have had it for 7 years!!! and that 6 biopsies have all come back OK, means that its nothing to worry about. I quote “its was just one ultrasound that made us suspicious”. I’m supposed to monitor it myself and go back to my GP if it changes. Not sure how I’ll know - I still think it feels exactly the same, just less painful.
Anyhow, at least it means I don’t have to answer Yes to any of the Health Questionnaire questions on my holiday insurance and go through all that again.
So, I can finally say a massive THANK YOU to everyone who has supported me over the last 8 months, especially in the first month when things looked likely to be a lot different. Thanks for all your nice words, jokes, humour and patience and just for being there.
Good Luck to everyone no matter what stage your are at. Hang on in there. Don’t give up, keep smiling, know that there are many many people wishing you well. Try everything you think might help - you never know it might. My Physio is also a Healer (not that I truely believe in all that) however, over the last few weeks he has been practising Reiki on me in the belive that it could help me heal. I’m sure he may well feel that this may have contributed to my lump shrinking - I’ll never be sure, but will also never be able to say for certain that it hasn’t!
I’ll keep an eye on the site to check up on you all, and try and be as supportive to you all as you have been to me.
God Bless and Keep Well
Lots of Love
Jxxxxxx
benign changes I am in a lot of breast pain but only on the left one.
After finding a small lump i went twice to the docs who then refered me the breast clinic.
I had a mammogram and ultrasound scan and they came back ok.
The consultant said it is benign changes and for me to keep checking them and if i am worried or anything unusual happens to go straight back to them.
I am doing what they have suggested , taking evening primrose, cutting down on caffine and animal fat.and have found that taking nurofen plus when the pain is unbearable.
Is there anything else i can do?
Its nothing to do with my monthly cycle although the thinking is its to do with my age. 46!
And what exactly is going on in the left one thats not happening to the right?
Is the left one aging quicker than the right one lol
Caz
oooops meant to have started a new post not add it to the end of this one
Sorry
Caz
Dear Cazza I have started a new thread for you with your post ‘benign changes’.
Kind regards
Forum Host
Breast Cancer Care