Younger women starting treatment

This is a new thread, to continue the discussions started on this thread:

Hope you find your way over here!


Hi girls im here. Are you??

Deb xX

Hi Deb,

am here too (JUST) feeling all a little bit wrong & not very right the last cpl of days, I just seem to get going with the whole positive thinking thing & then the what if thoughts creep in or I read/hear something & i am back to wobbly mess.

How are you doing, how were the 1st few days for you after treatment ? I hope all is going well for you.


Sarah i totally understand what you mean. You try be positive and then you read something or speak to someone or find out something new and it just throws you. You will feel better once you are in the know about eveything thats going on and what your treatment plan is. You can then begin to get on with fighting this horrid thing.

Day 5 now and i feel like the fog is lifting slightly. It is a bit yucky but doable. I was really thrown when i was sat with the ladies who were having treatment for secondary cancer and ive got to admit its done nothing for my positive thinking but its something i have to try shake off cause its just not healthy. Im going to see these ladies everytime i go so need to accept it. Been very tearful myself. What if what if what if thats all i keep thinking.

Jo hope your doing ok. Get saving your tokens.

Deb XX

Hi Deb,

Thank you & big hugs to you, I am dreading chemo but know that i will get through it as you all are/have.

I suppose its perfectly normal to have low days but your right we have to do a bit of hard work in order to get fighting this uninvited guest out of our lives.


Hi Jo,

Hope you are ok too ? xxxxx

Hi there…so this is our new home…
Hope your both having a ‘good day’ if you know what i mean. Deb I do hope your taking it easy and the effects of last weeks treatment lift. Sarah, I’m guessing it’s abit like beeing at the begining again, waiting for the next phase to begin. Forgive me if you have already said, but do you have your date for the first treatment?

I thought i was having a fairly good/okish day. I had even put my softie in this morning. But over the phone, twice by two different people, i’ve been told i don’t sound ok’ so ive logged on here to reassure myself i am ok.

£9.50 update, Hubby says we can’t afford it. totally skint due to me been off work and December been the totally snowed in really affected his work. I just wanted something to look forward too. He is really snappy and not happy. I think everything has really caught him up this weekend.

Take Care
Jo xxx

Jo you sound ok to me hun. Book the holiday. It doesnt cost too much fri to mon and it doesnt have to cost a lot once there. You both need something to look forward to. If this has taught me anything it is live for today, dont put things off just go for it.

When do you plan to return to work or havent you thought that far ahead yet?

Deb XX

Ps how is your wound healing? You managing to do your exercises?

Hi again
I saw a practice nurse of friday at my doctors and she was very reasurring. She thought the sharp bit under my arm was a stitch that hadn’t disolved, i find myself prodding it all the time, its like having a spot, you just have to pick it.
The discomfort and nerve pain was really pulling me down so been prescribed Amitriptyline for the nerve pain along with the Diclofenac and paracetamol i was already taking. Hopefully they will get on top of the burning sensation. Got a letter through confirming my referral to Psychologist today, basically telling me i’d joined the queue etc. I’m struggling to accept lfe with one breast i am happy at home, i feel safe here, i don’t have to suffer the discomfort of the softie (had to take it out by teatime)but leaving the house is hard. Swimming lessons tomorrow so my little girl won’t allow me to hide away forever so that is my focus at the moment i can’t let her down ive got to take her, that is her routine.
You and Sarah give me strength, you are both facing this head on with the chemo on top of surgery so Thank you! thank you! thank you!
Take care

Hi ladies,

I’m Kate and I’d like to join in your thread if that’s ok!
I was diagnosed on 1st December with a grade 3 2.5cm tumour with “reactionary” changes in the lymph nodes. I had a CT, bone scan and MRI pre-surgery, the MRI showed a second tunour in the other breast that was 8mm, grade 2. I’m only 30.
I had a double lumpectomy and sentinal node biopsies on Christmas Eve and although I’m recovering OK, I’m so scared to get the results on Wednesday. I really hope the nodes are clear and the clearance was enough.
Did any of you get a burning sensation under your arms? And I’ve already had a seroma which has come back again - is it normal to get recurrence?

I don’t have the start date for chemo yet as we’re undergoing a single round of IVF first. (We got married in September last year and this has really screwed our “life” plans for kiddies). I’ve tried to be positive about hte upcoming treatments. I’ve got 2 wigs, a lovely selection of scarves and a friend is coming over to help with make-up. Then the what ifs set in… what if I can’t cope with the treatment?What if I can’t get up in the morning and look in the mirror?! What if I can’t work for the next 6 months? What if it’s worse than we thought? Or if it comes back?

This waiting game is so difficult, how did you cope? I’ve not worked since diagnosis as my concentration span just dropped and I keep forgetting things. Is this normal?! Maybe it’d be better for me to work (I’m a self-employed optician) but if I miss something it could be really bad!! It’s driving me crazy being at home all the time :frowning:

Apologies if this is so fragmented, I’m just writing my thoughts as they arise! Any advice would be welcome to get through this waiting phase…


Hi Kate,

Sorry you’ve “joined the club” :frowning: But you will find lots of support and advice on here its great and such a reassurance.

Im Sarah age 38 dx Sept 10 with a grade 3 11mm tumour (no lymph node involvement although slight vasular invasion and i’m having my 3rd lot of chemo tomorrow (3 of 6). There’s another thread you may may useful called “starting my pink road of cemo, 15th Nov”. Theres lot of fellow pinkies all going through chemo at the moment, all varying stages, but its a lovely lively active thread with lots of us to give each other help, advice and support".

Have you seen your onc yet? Do you know what treatment your having yet? With regard to chemo i was very scared prior to treament as i didn’t think i need it but ended up having to but as least i’ve got the reassurance of knowing i’ve thrown everything at. I expected the worst and so far (fingers crossed) it really hasn’t been as bad as i was expecting, you just need to listen to your body…

Good luck with your treatment.

Sarah x

Hi Kate,
You are most welcome to join us here and ask any questions, share your fears and fustrations.
I had a MX and SNB in December and still have the burning sensation and discomfort around the scar area and down my arm. My BCN suggested i saw my GP as there is medication availble to relieve that discomfort. Do you have regular contact with your BCN? Have you any local organisations that could also give you support?

As for the ‘waiting game’ I can only suggest you take it one day at a time. Allow your self time to process each ‘stage’ you will have ‘good’ days and ‘low/bad’ days it seems to be part of the process.

Like Sarah says this forum is a great lifeline, to offload and support others too.
I will be thinking of you on wednesday.
Take Care
Jo xxx

Hi Kate welcome to the club, one none of us want to be in but your in the best place here to receive support and understanding.

The stage you are at now is one of the worst stages cause its full of what ifs. Believe me once you have got all the results you will then know what your dealing with and be able to fight it better. I have had one treatment so far and i wouldnt say it would be advisable to work. Makes you very tired and just not with it.

My coping mechanisms with waiting was to keep busy and to chat on here. This site has got me out of a few dark moments.Re your seroma i think they can recurre numerous times but any concerns you have you should ring your BCN.

Jo hope the swimming lesson went ok. Just think when you get new boob it may give increased confidence. Well thats what i keep hoping but mine hasnt made an appearance yet. I get frustrated not knowing what im going to be able to wear and what not. Hate the fact i wont be able to wear my lovely bikinis if we were ever able to afford to go abroad again (not been since having the troublesome twosome)

Sarah and Sarah hope your both ok.

Deb XX

Hi Ladies,

Thank you so much for your replies. It’s nice to know that I’m not on my own here.
I had my post-op appointment this afternoon with the surgeon. She was very happy with her hady work - I’ve healed really well and the seromas are small (I had a litle more removed today but it’s getting less). She “fluffed” the breast tissue during the surgery to give me a good shape, and that’s why I’m getting odd sensations and slight burning. Apparently it’s the nerves getting used to being where they are?!
Anyway, the results are really good, even though the initial tumour was 6 mm bigger than they expected. I had a 31mm grade 3 removed from my right and a 11mm grade 2 removed from my left. Both had excellent clearance. The sentinal nodes both came back negative too. The larger tumour had some blood vessel involvement but they got all of that too. All in all, a good day.

Now it’s on to the egg harvesting next week and chemo in Feb.

I’m a bit worried about the constipation (prone to that). I’m wheat intolerant so can’t have bran or wholemeal bread for roughage… anything I can do in the 3 weeks before the chemo starts?!


Hi Girls,

hope we are all ok ?

Deb, hope chemo is being kind to you & you are not suffering too many SE’s same to you Sarah & Jo hope you are not feeling too low & are managing to get out & about a bit more, big hugs to you all.

Hi Kate,

Welcome :slight_smile: am glad your results visit wasnt too bad & that they had some positive news for you, as Deb always says i think we all start to feel better when we know what we are dealing with & have a plan in place. I am still waiting for results, I had my surgery on Xmas Eve & results last week were small tumour 13 mm clear margins, grade 3 but they have sent my lymph nodes off as there was a ? over them am still waiting for them to come back but did speak to my BCN tonight who has advised me that my own hospital pathology marked them as basically clear but a cpl of inflamed cells present so my breast surgeon is the one who is seeking a 2nd expert opinion to be 100 % sure so they have travelled off to another hospital, am feeling better about that as she has explained it is more likely that they will be ok than not ok & my surgeon just wants to be sure so am actually feeling grateful instead of worried now, still have to have Chemo because of grade 3 & am waiting for my oncology appointment now.

Love to everyone


Hi Ladies
Can I join your discussion thread?
I’m 36, married and have 2 stepsons aged 18 and 20. I was diagnosed with invasive carcinoma on 7th Jan - what a great start to the New Year. I’ve had to have another biopsy last week from lymph nodes to see if it has gone into there. Information overload on Friday when I was told and I’ve done nothing but worry and feel like I’m living a different life ever since trying to work aswell. My husband has been fantastic and supportive but we just don’t know what to expect (although his mother did have mastectomy 18months ago and has got the all clear)
Have got appointments all arranged next week for plastic surgeon on Monday and for MRI scan on Thursday but just want to know what is going to happen when. Have loads of questions for appointment tomorrow.
Any advice and guidance/support would be great.

Hi Ladies

Welcome to you 070111, my advice is write questions down as they pop into your mind. I went into appointments with lists of questions, some they answered as part of the session anyway but there were some on my list they’d not covered. Its good to hear your OH is very supoortive keep talking to him, even if you feel it may upset him, keeping your feelings bottled up can do more harm in the long run.
Take Care.

Kate, Glad to hear there was some positive news for you in your results. Good look with the egg harvesting. Keep talking. Take Care.

Hey Sarah, Deb and Sarah Hope you all had a good week. 9.50 website has crashed so not a happy bunny this morning, was trying to get the weekend of the 29th April, as it has the wedding bank hol and mayday. Heyhoo what will be will be.

Take Care
Jo xxx

ooh forgot to mention any one watching Emmerdale? Always thought the policeman was creepy?
Jo xxx

Evening all

Well got the results yesterday from the lymph biopsy and surprise, surprise got it in there aswell!! Great, hating Fridays in January at the moment as nothing but bad news! Consultant wants me to make decision to have chemo before surgery - I’m not swayed either way and he would rather that I did as it would start to shrink the lump and attack the lymph. Off to see Onc on Monday morning to discuss chemo and BCN thinks may start treatment on Friday. Don’t know what to think, I’ve got no emotions at the moment, haven’t cried - even 24hrs later and I don’t even feel numb - is this normal??

Me and OH thinking that will have chemo first so that at least I’ve started the treatment and things will hopefully make it easier for surgery - wanted to have the other boob made smaller to match what would be left of ‘bad one’ and at the moment surgery wouldn’t be until early Feb - far too long to wait to start doing anything.

Appt with plastic surgeon put back until Weds as with different surgeon and now MRI scan on Thursday morning.



Hi Liz,

So sorry about your results but sounds like they are putting your treatment plan into action pretty quickly which is good.

I like you on Dx was so numb, infact the real tears didnt come until after surgery when they told me that i would now require chemo, up to surgery it had been radiotherapy & tamoxifen but lump although small was more aggressive than thought.

Try & keep strong & keep chatting as it really does help & try to deal with one stage at a time ( NO googling!!)

Kate, hope you are hanging in there & are ok.

Jo, hope you are feeling stronger & that the swimming lessons went well & totally agree about the Emmerdale policeman :wink:

Deb, where are you, you have gone quiet on us ? ? ? hope everything is ok.

Have at last received lymph node results, they were sent off for a 2nd opinion but BCN rang late Thursday night to say that they are all clear & no vascular invasion but lump defo grade 3.

keep going with the £9.50 website, gives you something to look forward to & the kids have such fun ( adults too).

Hope other Sarah is doing ok & that chemo went ok last week for you.

Love to you all

Hi all im back. Disappeared for a while cause been busy. My sons 7th birthday yesterday and i was well for it so thats good. In fact i feel back to normal now other than ulcers in my mouth. And fantastic news…i should get fitted for new boob this week. Yipee im so excited. No more bean bag!!!

Sarah thats great news about the lymph nodes. Chemo is yuck but other than having to have this i think your results are positive overall girl. Just need to get started now.

Welcome Liz. Nothing i can say really as jo and sarah have said it all. I have lymph node involvement 3 out of 19. Mine is 4cm grade 3. I dont understand this chemo first option cause i was never given the choice. It was mastectomy ANC and then treatment. Is it done to try just do a lumpectomy instead of a mastectomy?

Jo you must persevere with the site. We got booked in straight away for 3rd june. This should fall 3wks after last chemo and just before radio. Emmerdale has been exciting yes. Poor andys gonna get set up big time now isnt he. Hows your hubby? still grumpy?

Love to everyone
Deb XX