Hey Bonbon - No need to apologise to ME, darlin'. Yeh, I'm sure they must have to put up with other "frustrated" patients, but they are just the messengers. I think we can forget that sometimes. Bit like complaining to a waiter for a lousy meal - not the waiters fault. Glad you made a point of calling and apologising further, though. They probably don't have that happen too often 😃 It's a very thoughtful thing to do, shows you care and respect them. Will have brightened their day a bit too.
Sorry's such a small word, but can smooth out some of the roughest bumps our frustration can cause. I've had to learn from my own sometimes hyper-reactive behaviour (!!), Bonbon, having Bipolar Disorder. I'm often having to apologise to people for my behaviour 👹, as I don't always realise until after. Then when I've calmed down, humble myself and put it right. So I wasn't having a GO at you, was just making a point from my own experience.
It's hard enough for you all to have to deal with waiting for tests, worrying what it is, is it something ominous, waiting for ops and results, without you all having to deal with the effects of Co-vid and wrong addresses(!!), so I'm not surprised you got all aeriated.
Hope you, and everyone else on here, don't have to wait too much longer.
Oh Dear, tying myself in knots now. Behaved badly in that I did lose my temper which I was shocked about but not vicious. Frustrated with the apparent lack of communication and organisation. Sorry Delly. I did ring the clinic again yesterday and apologised if I had come across badly but they were very kind. Perhaps I'm not only one who has felt completely stressed out and a bit helpless in the wait. They don't seem to run any form of cancellation system either so the chance of maybe being seen earlier is not possible. I did speak to my usual Doctor too and she's prescribed something to calm me down a bit. Although another doctor had referred me, my own doctor has told me that she is not particularly worried. I know I can't assume anything at all in this but I know I have to try and rein it in.
Bonbon - Was just going off what you actually said in your earlier post - "I hit the roof, behaved very badly and gave the receptionist a piece of my mind. Not feeling very proud of myself right now but I was furious." xxx
In my defence, when I "lost it," I did say I knew it wasn't her fault and was not personally nasty. More tears and frustration. Also, more a criticism of the inept way things seem to have been handled. Having spoken to four different people in Outpatients (to which the phone seems to be diverted all the time) and being told different things, I was just frustrated. Truly, I wouldn't have a problem saying sorry.
Hi Delly, you make a good point about the receptionist - not her fault. I've edited my post because I thought the original might sound like I was criticising receptionists and I certainly do not want to do that. All the staff work so hard, especially in these dreadfully difficult times. Hope you are keeping well, thanks for the humour and wisdom you share with us all. Love Mo x
Oh dear, Bonbon. Wrong address!! NO it shouldn't have happened. But, POOR receptionist. Would it have been HER fault?? It's only natural our feelings run high and patience low with this gawd awful disease, coupled with Co-vid complications/delays.
Hi Bonbon, I just popped on to the forum and saw your post, that's so annoying about the wrong address, not surprised you are cross. You have a date now so try to remember it is perfectly possible, even likely, that this is benign. I had several referrals in my 50s which were all harmless cysts. As a wise woman on here always says, you do not have cancer until a doctor tells you do. Try to take comfort from not being urgent, that sounds like your gp is not too worried but wants to make sure. Also do not worry about the time of day. I've had bc more than once since about age 60, (but fine now) and in my experience these clinics just go on for as late as they need to, they just press on til we are all done. Having said all this I do understand how hard it is, waiting is horrid, but try to stay positive until you are told different. Lots of love Mo xx
Thank you again, everyone. You are all Stars!
I rang the hospital today because I still haven't received an appointment letter. Firstly, they confirmed they had sent a letter - to the wrong address and which was my previous one. There is no excuse for this as I checked at my surgery that they had the up to date address and that it appeared on the referral letter they had sent to the Breast Clinic. Something like that should not happen for medical matters. It's too serious to get wrong.
Further, my appointment isn't until 3 February because I'm not an "urgent" referral. So another 3 weeks' of torture. As it's quite late in the afternoon there surely won't be time for everything necessary to be done? I hit the roof, behaved very badly and gave the receptionist a piece of my mind. Not feeling very proud of myself right now but I was furious. Am I overreacting? Maybe I am, but I wish the constant churning in my tummy would just go away!
Everyone is so kind and supportive, Thank you Delly.
BonBon please let us know when your appointment comes through, I hope your not waiting to long.
Ariom I have downloaded tons of trash TV to get me through the quieter times when I’m not working and my mind goes into overdrive! On the day I will make sure I take some mags with me as I have to go alone due to Covid, I feel sorry for my husband as he will probably be fretting more than me in the day!
much love to everyone xx
Cariad glad to hear you've got your appointment date. Have you got something good to read to take with you - nothing too heavy because it's a busy place, but something as there is a lot of hanging around. I had no phone signal in the department I was in.
Bonbon - hope you get your appointment soon!
Hi Cariad - Yeh, my fingers are crossed for you too.
Bonbon - I've just scanned back to your original post, where you're naturally questioning "Why have I got this disease?".
I was 46 with my 1st BC, back in 2006, and like you, no family history, ate very healthily (Mediterranean style diet - lots of olive oil and garlic 😋), always drank in moderation, swam 2-3 x a week, out rambling every w/end, so was extremely fit. Put mine down to a prolonged period of high stress and worry, around having to make major changes to profession, business, income, having to give up my home (which I loved and had worked hard for and on), move back to an area I loathed. Stress is an extremely underestimated affector, silent killer.
But . . . .you still hear of others, without ANY of the above who get it. Seems no rhymn nor reason to it.
it's bizarre, isn't it. You wait and worry but, like you, I'm dreading the unsettling feeling I know I'll have when the appointment letter actually arrives! it sort of makes a situation you want to just go away, too real even though it's another step closer to getting things sorted out. I'm so sorry you now have to wait until 20 January but hope you fill your days with lots of distracting things.
I will keep everything crossed for you. xxx
Like yourself I’m waiting on my first appointment to come around. My appointment arrived really quickly, I visited my GP this Wednesday and had my appointment through on Friday, I attend clinic on 20th January and it seems like an age away.
One minute I’m fine and then it hits me and I’m petrified again.... like yourself I have stopped consulting Dr Google as I don’t think it was doing me any good! Everyone on this site has been wonderful.
I hope you receive an appointment soon, when mine arrived it knocked me a little bit and the fear was back but I just want it to come around quickly so I can get some answers.
Hello Girls, I'm very touched that you all took the time to write reassuring words to me. Thank you, thank you, thank you. You've been amazingly kind. The clinic did tell me that they weren't too busy at the moment so an appointment should be forthcoming very quickly - but still waiting for the letter! Maybe I'll have some news at the start of next week but I will keep everyone up to date.
I've now stopped consulting Dr Google. The more I've read, the more fearful I've become and I cannot keep scaring the living daylights out of myself. This is a rational, responsible site and it's helped enormously to read sensible and kind advice from you so I will stick to just here from now on. I hope you all have a lovely weekend and thank you again for your interest. x
Sorry you're going through it at the moment. Waiting, waiting . . . . You're mind can't help thinking the worst.
It's only natural to find it upsetting - let it out I always say. Not always good to keep a brave face and keep it locked inside. Good that you've joined the Forum, you're amongst excellent company on here, to help, support, advise, give you a giggle even.
I hope it all turns out to be nothing to worry about for you, darlin', but please take comfort by the fact sooo many of us are looong term survivors. Me - of 14 and 13yrs with both boobs. Think we should give out yearly badges on here, or at least a 😍
Fingers crossed for you, lots of love, Delly xxxx
As Arion says there are many causes of lumps and a lot of lumps are benign, such as cysts. This page of the breast cancer now site lists a number of causes of benign breast lumps - as you'll see from a quick look there are lots of causes of benign lumps:
While you are waiting for the referral and results try to distract yourself with anything which works for you, a nice walk, watching and listening to nature/birds etc, talking to friends, cooking, watching a distracting film....anything which works for you (and isn't breaking lockdown!).
Please don't beat yourself up about having moments where you don't feel brave....it's natural to feel a bit unsettled and worried, so just be kind to yourself, confide in a friend (preferably someone who is quite calm) and distract yourself.
XXX Seabreeze (6 years on, diagnosed in 40's, doing well, just giving back to the forum community which I found so helpful all those years ago)
Hello As Ariom has said the wait for an appt is I think the worst part - we all let our thoughts run amok. I had a small cyst a few months ago and since I’m 66 I was sure it wouldn’t be benign - thankfully it was. I couldn’t wait for my appt to come through and at the same time I was terrified when it did come through. As everyone on here will tell you stay away from dr google it will just scare and confuse you at the same time. Any questions or fears you have just ask the kind ladies on here and they will help you through it. Don’t worry too much about being brave and let others (family and friends) do all they can to support you. Sending you a hug and best wishes.
That's really sweet and thank you Ariom for replying. I've got my brain training games to play plus lots of other distracting things to keep me busy when I'm not working, doing normal everyday routine things, or googling....
I am sure I don't have to describe or explain just how I'm feeling because everyone here has been through this tortuous waiting thing. I do think I should be a bit more resilient and strong though. I've had so much life experience and am so cross with myself that I'm in such a wobble. x
Hi and welcome to the forum
Waiting for appointments is terrible. I'm just out the other side having been given the all clear. All I can advise is to try and keep busy. Maybe download an app like duolingo or a game to your phone so if you're tempted to Google you've something to distract you. I looked up research for a friend's assignment to keep me off it as much as possible.
90% of lumps are non cancerous. Try not to Google and try not to worry (I know easier said than done).
I'm not post menopause (I'm 40) but my lump turned out to be a cyst even though it was an unusual shape and they found a cyst in the other breast which I hadn't felt and even though the aspirate was different, it was almost a normal cyst.
Hope you're seen quickly! Let us know if you have any questions and good luck!
I've been referred to the Breast Clinic and hope I will get an appointment at the beginning of next week. I've got a spongy lumpy area with a small round lump on the very lower edge of my right breast. My boobs aren't very big at all, I have a very boney ribcage and sides, but I do work out quite a lot and so muscles are well defined.
I'm 56, went through the menopause at 51 and apart from having a coil for about a year, haven't used birth control or HRT, have no family history of breast cancer. I am terribly worried and haven't helped myself by incessant googling about what this could be. I do realise I shouldn't be doing this. Despite my age, could this still be non-cancerous? I know nobody has a crystal ball, I just have to wait in the most controlled way I can (which isn't very brave most of the time) and go through the processes of diagnosis as so very many people have to do. I just wanted to write my worries down in the hope it would help me deal with this in a better way and would be grateful for any wise words anyone can offer.