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Family Members Forum??

14 REPLIES 14
worrieddaugh_1
Member

Re: Family Members Forum??

Thank you for the reply, My mum has got some web sites that she has had a look on but not sure if she has joined up to any like I have. She is one of the lucky ones where they have manage to get all the cancer. She is the kind of person that dont like talking to friends and family about how she is feeling, But saying that she is learning now, that talking to people do help.

Its Hard for people that have not have to go through the same thing to get thier head around that its still a very hard thing to get through.

I will have a look around this site and see what i can find. I know i need to be strong and be there for my mum. Which i will do.

I hope that I may also be able to help someone, even if its just a case of being there when they need to talk.

tinkerbel_2008
Member

Re: Family Members Forum??

Hi,

i am very sorry to hear about your mum but glad they have taken all of the cancer out. There is someone on here called jayceetee who's mum had a mastectomy and reconstructive surgery.

I would just say if it was me and my mum had had the operation you just have to be brave and positive for her and have to be strong yourself. It will be awful for her being a woman and having your breast removed. I suppose it makes it all more real. Tell me if i'm wrong. You just have to both think that the cancer has been taken out so at least that's a positive one.

We are all in similar situations on this forum where our parents or someone close to us has cancer or has had it and we are all worried and not sure what or how to feel. You are not on your own in this and nor is your mum. Your mum may want to join this site and talk to others who have the same thing. If you look at the different forums there may be one for women who have had mastectomys. Be strong. xxx Annabel xx

worrieddaugh_1
Member

Re: Family Members Forum??

Hello.

I am not sure If I am posting in the right place and I am really sorry.

I am new to this site, and never thought I would have to come on a site like this.

I am 29 years old, And just over two months ago my mum found out she had ductal carcinoma in situ. At first the doctor just thought it was a infection, but it turned out to be more than that.

She had all the tests done and she had the lump removed, two weeks later she went back for the results, and the good news is that they managed to get all the cancer, but they have said they want to remove the breast as there is still loads of abnormal cells and if they didnt the cancer will just keep returning and wouldnt be fair on her or her body to keep having the lumps removed.

My mum is having the breast removed on the 19th Nov, And i know she is trying to be brave and strong,but inside i know she is crumbling. Which is very understandable. I live quite a way from her, but am going down soon to see her.

Is there any advice that they can give me that will help me for when i am down with her (I go down to see her 3 days after the op).
This is hard for me, and i feel so helpless and could do with someone to talk that going through or been through the same thing.

Once again sorry if i have posted in the wrong place

tinkerbel_2008
Member

Re: Family Members Forum??

Hi Jen,

I've written you a message back - bit of an essay. Here to talk if you need to. It's good to talk and get it all out of your system. xx

Jayceetee
Member

Re: Family Members Forum??

Hi I think it would be a fab idea.
My mum has just been diagnosed with breast cancer for the third time in 10 years and I'm struggling.
I don't live at home anymore and am an only child (I'm 23) and I would really appreciate talking to others in the same situation as I don't have any siblings to do that with. OH tries his best but it's not the same and he doesn't like it when I cry (he gets all panicky and bloke-like!)
x

tinkerbel_2008
Member

Re: Family Members Forum??

Hi again Rachepops - I have commented on your last post.

Hi Support4Mum. I'm really sorry to hear about your mum. How did you deal with it all if you don't mind me asking? I find it difficult to know whether i should be looking into it more and finding out bits or what. My mum is very strong willed and isn't letting it run her life and just getting on with it so not much else I can give mum as she's so positive but for me I don't know whether to look into it more. xx

Support4Mum
Member

Re: Family Members Forum??

Hi all

I am 26 and my mum died of secondary breast cancer at the begining of September. I don't check these forums as much as I used to as no longer looking for answers, but would still be very keen to talk to people who have been in a similar boat to me and also offer my own experiences wherever helpful.

rachepops
Member

Re: Family Members Forum??

It would be good to talk to other young people in a live chat - i'm 27 and got married this May the weekend after my mums treatment ended (she was diagnosed Sep 09, had mastectomy, 6 chemo, radiotherepy and on hormones). We were told yesterday its spread to her hips and now waiting for a scan to look at her organs...i'm very new to forums and wanted to find other young people in a similar situation to find out their stories and coping strategies.

tinkerbel_2008
Member

Re: Family Members Forum??

Hi Jennybean,
No it doesn't sound weird at all. I know exactly how you feel and exactly what you mean. I don't really talk to my friends about it but sometimes it's nice to talk to someone who is in the same situation. If you ever want to chat, then you are more than welcome to private message me. How is your mum dealing with it all and how are you? What treatment is she having? Annabel xx

Jennybean
Member

Re: Family Members Forum??

Hi, nice to meet you. I'm knew around here so scanning people's messages. I'm 23 and my mum was diagnosed with BC for the second time last week. There's so much info going around, it's hard to take it all in sometimes. A livechat thing would be wonderful. I don't know anyone who has experience their mum having cancer so i feel awkward talking to anyone about it. Does that sound weird? J xx

tinkerbel_2008
Member

Re: Family Members Forum??

Hi Leah,
Thank you for your message. Since I posted this topic I have had about 3 messages from different people saying that they are in the same boat as me and roughly around the same age.
I think it is important for people like myself who just want to talk to others who are going through the same thing to come and just chat. To know that they are not alone. Since I came to this site I know that i'm not the only one in this situation. I do think that a weekly, live chat session should be done for family members to talk to each other - be it husbands, wives, children, parents etc etc. We are all in the same boat and it is nice to discuss it all.
If you could look into this or consider it, it would be brilliant. I find it difficult speaking to people face to face about this as I normally end up in a blubbering mess so chatting on a computer is much easier I think because people can't see your emotions etc. If you know what I mean.
Many thanks again, Annabel

JulieD
Community Champion

Re: Family Members Forum??

Just bumping this up in hopes people will notice it and respond. I think it would be a good idea for relatives to have the chance to chat.

Leah_BCC
Member

Re: Family Members Forum??

Hi tinkerbel

We are going to be running some special live chat sessions in October, as part of our focus on secondary breast cancer during breast cancer awareness month. However, neither will be quite what you're looking for.

We are planning special live chat sessions on the following topics:

- Talking with children when a parent has been diagnosed with secondary breast cancer

- Session for partners of people diagnosed with secondary breast cancer

We haven't planned to run a session for family and friends of people with secondary breast cancer, but we might consider adding an extra session if we could be sure that there would be enough people interested in joining the chat.

Perhaps if other people would be interested in a live chat session for family and friends of people with secondary breast cancer, they could post here to let us know? Then we'd have some idea of the level of interest.

Best wishes
Leah

scottishlass
Member

Re: Family Members Forum??

Hi tinkerbel, If you go into your inbox...I have sent you a private message. Val

tinkerbel_2008
Member

Family Members Forum??

Hi,

My mum has secondary cancer and I'm 25. I would really love to be able to talk to people in the same situation as me and around the same age. Does anyone know if there is a forum for people who's parents have secondary cancer or just cancer? Sometimes it's easier talking to people who are going through the same thing. I'd love to know if you know any forums where we can all talk. There is the live chat on Tuesday and Thursdays but didn't know if another chat night could be set up or something. Thoughts would be appreciated.
Thank you.