Good morning everyone
Booksandwine - good to hear from you. Glad to hear surgery went ok and not too much pain. Happy Birthday for earlier and hope you enjoy celebrating when you are feeling better. Yes, hospitals are very noisy aren't they?! No rest there.
Lovewine - glad you have your surgery plan. Your panic attack sounds very familiar to me. Now chemo is over friends are talking about "coming through the other side" and "getting back to normal" when I know that life will be very different from how it was before and I still have to face all sorts of challenges. Thinking of it as my "new normal".
Rosie - sorry you are having trouble with expanders - i hope you can get that sorted.
Wildpurl - glad you enjoyed a day off. Even the thought of work seems a bit strange to me at the moment!
Joan - pleased you are feeling well - it's amazing what a good night's sleep can do.
Well, I had a bad day yesterday. i had an appointment with a radiologist to discuss having radio to the lymph nodes rather than surgery as I had read a recent study that found there was less risk of lymphoedema with rads. Firstly I didn't see the person who I thought would be seeing, then he said that the studies that have been done have all been done on women who have had adjuvant chemo and as there was no research on women who have had neoadjuvant chemo they still recommend surgical clearance. So i was disappointed with that. He then went on to say that I would be having rads to my supraclavicular fossa (above the collarbone) as there were nodes there. First I'd heard of it so that came as a bit of a shock. Has anyone else had that? I thought I was just having the rads to the breast. Then he finished off with the tactless comment that if they have to take more tissue than expected at surgery (I'm having WLE with flap recon which I am happy with) then I'll need a mastectomy after all. As I have had an "excellent almost complete response" to chemo with only a teeny tiny bit left, it's a bit frustrating to think they might take just as much tissue anyway. I felt upset afterwards and just so fed up with the whole cancer thing. Just when you think you know what is happening to you, something completely new comes along.
Anyway, today is a new day and my sister and I are heading for the Moore/Rodin exhibition at Compton Verney (Warwickshire) and then going on to visit my Mum. So for today at least I shall put it all to one side and go and relax.
I hope you all have a good day.
Thanks for the kind words Rosie. It would be good if all other life problems and issues would just disappear for the duration of the treatment but unfortunately things don't work quite like that!
It's strange isn't it how we have all had such different hair loss/growth patterns whilst basically having the same drugs. My leg hair never really stopped - just slowed down but just when everything else is growing, the legs seems to have slowed down even more! I wish my eyelashes would grow as I have a really watery eye and the lack of lashes doesn't help. I know that I'm very lucky to have held on to my brows though (although I still may not be completely out the woods) so won't complain about the lashes! My head is fluffy and I'm still trying to work out what colour is coming through.
Hope you're having a good day.
Joan - glad to hear all went to plan with the surgery. Yes, I have been told there will be quite a dent which was a bit of a surprise as the chemo has all but got rid of the lump (there was only a 6mm "inferior nodule" left according to the MRI a month ago). Seems they take all the tissue from around where the lump was. In my case, the LICAP flap reconstruction will hopefully "fill the gap". Get lots of rest over the next few days and wishing you a quick recovery.
Rosie - I think I've been feeling low partly because of thinking about the future and obsessing slightly about lymphoedema and partly because I have some other difficult personal stuff going on. Have been feeling a bit overwhelmed at times. The ongoing oral thrush hasn't helped. It's not too uncomfortable any more, just an annoying reminder of the chemo. Jackie - I'm taking Nystan drops, the Fluconazole not having worked. It hasn't helped being on antibiotics following the neutropenia episode.
Wildpurl - sounds like you've had a busy and productive day - glad to hear you managed a bit of rest too!
Lovewine - yes, normality is very important. I've managed a degree of it during chemo and have had some lovely days where I've almost forgotten I'm ill but I'm getting restless now and am actually looking forward to work and focussing on other things, as well as not spending so much time at "my second home" - ie the hospital!
Sleep well everyone. Zzzzzzz......