Anyone due to start chemo April 14??

[rosie14]

Good morningn Tlj I think the fact that,your son has gone from phoning to texting is a positive. I didn't attend the school disco I came home to,sort the dog out DH went and said there was a good turn out. I shall,just be pleased to,get the kick off date for rads now as I have to have 28 sessions!
Hope you mange your bike ride!

[rosie14]

Well I have done it I have driven the car! I didn't go far just about a mile to visit the Yr 1 teacher who needed help with her planning. Managed to sort her out. I am planning to go into school Monday for a couple of hours now I can get in and out to suit me!!
I don't like the commercialism of Christmas either Lovewine and thank goodness it doesn't get into the shops until much later here!
I do love seeing all the family over the Christmas holiday though! We are going to our daughters this year. We fly on Christmas Eve to Manchester stay over at the Premier Inn and travel to Newcastle on Christmas morning to arrive in time for pre dinner drinks!
Glad you have finished the blanket look forward to seeing the photo Wildpurl. Gosh I have made and iced my Christmas cakes on Christmas Eve some years. Will be leaving that pleasure for my daughter this year! We used to own a holiday lodge in Devon and let it when we were in Cyprus and stay in it when we visited UK. We had a lock up unit outside with our personal effects and my Christmas cake gear was kept in there. When we sold it 2 years ago we had to get rid of all the items in the unit. Our son in Plymouth had some and some went to the charity shop. So my Christmas cake gear has gone! Last year was the very first Christmas in our married life that I had not made a cake.
Got to do the weekly shop this afternoon.
Have a good Saturday ladies!

[Tlj63]

Morning everyone.
Jackie, I'm sending you lucky lottery vibes. I completely understand your concerns but the thing that keeps me going is the thought that I have to for my children. So the irony is that although we worry about our children, it's them that keeps us moving forward positively. A week in Cyprus sounds lovely and just what you all need.
Wildpurl, good luck with the blanket making and I hope the weather stays dry as I'm sure you will want to be out in your garden before the weather gets too cold.
Lovewine, really sorry about your iPad. You must be so annoyed with yourself. Hope your son is coping without his girlfriend.
Rosie, are you resting today after your busy Friday? Glad you've got your RT sorted. Attending a school disco must be quite an experience, somewhere between scary and amusing!
Joan, hope the RT is still going well. Was it you that said the machine is called Bosworth? Is it called that after the battle? Hope the grandchildren are not exhausting you too much.
Cassie, I know what you mean about losing weight. I haven't gained any weight during my treatment but at about the time I was diagnosed I was thinking I really needed to shift a bit of weight. It is a dilemma. You want to loose weight but you don't want to deprive your body of any needed nutrients.
The sun is shining here, so we are hoping to go for a family bike ride once the dreaded homework is out of the way. My older son has gone from phoning us everyday to just texting, so it's hard to tell how he is. I have to assume he is ok, otherwise I would have heard from his housemaster. This boarding school parenting is actually very tricky to manage. I'm trying not to worry about him, but just want to be able to give him a big hug.

[Wildpurl]

Morning everyone, glad to hear from you Jackie. I can only agree with what rosie and Lovewine have already said about continuing research and new treatments. I think we are all also looking at having a diet and lifestyle that gives us the best possible chance of good health, as you are doing. The juicer bullet sounds interesting, I have not heard of them before.
A holiday in Cyprus sounds lovely, I am sure you and your family will enjoy it, the temperatures sound very pleasant and I fancy a trip on the Jolly Roger myself!

Rosie, glad you got so much sorted out yesterday but the oncologist not being there after making the appointment is a bit much!!!

Lovewine, so sorry about the iPad incident, try not to give yourself a hard time over it, anyone could have done the same. My daughter left her brand new iPod under her pillow in a hostel one morning while travelling in Africa and she decided to put regrets and self blame out of her mind and just accept it, so as not to spoil her trip, which I thought was very sensible of her. I do hope you can make an insurance claim or maybe get another for Christmas?
Speaking of Christmas I LURVE Christmas I'm afraid and am looking forward to starting the preparations. I have been thinking of making a Christmas cake, but not got round to it yet.

And...the blanket is finished! Photo in due course. I will now be finishing a blanket for my daughter and starting a pullover for myself.

[Lovewine]

Morning everyone, hopefully a better one today. Going to walk dogs and then do some work I should have done yesterday! It's nice to have 3 days off from radiotherapy-back Tuesday, my machine is called bosworth and is having a day off on Monday!!
Rosie, the thought of Christmas looming makes me go cold! I dislike it for the commercialism, adverts are on t.v already and drive me mad! Think with all the crap of this year I would rather ignore it altogether, but can't.

[rosie14]

Oh Lovewine I am sorry about your iPad. It is so easy to scoop them up or bury them I don't suppose your insurance company will help out. Do you have the receipt you could try milking it saying you are a cancer patient?
I am sorry to hear that your OH has been ill and hope you had a better night last night. Hopefully he will get his scan soon.
Joan hope your OH is feeling better now and you are able,or,enjoy the remainder of your holiday.
Wildpurl what will you do when you have finished your blanket?
Jackie it sounds like you are being very sensible exploring food options which will help you. My eldest son sent me a book called: What to eat if you have cancer by Maureen Keane and Danielle Chace and I found it very useful when planning meals. My cancer was very aggressive and inoperable at the onset Jackie! My sons wedding kept me focused and your son and husband will keep you focused! Xxx
Hope all other ladies are ok and Tlj that your son has settled back down at school. Not long till half term now.
I was thinking yesterday with 5 weeks of radiotherapy starting soon, by the time I finish we will be well on the way to Christmas and the end of this dreadful year that we have all had to and continue to journey through!!!

[Lovewine]

Evening everyone and a big, warm welcome back Jackie! I am in complete agreement with Rosie in the fact people are given bleak outlooks and prove doctors wrong- in my hospital there is a big research department and I am on a clinical trial for radiotherapy and I chat to research doctors a lot and they say the new drugs coming through now for breast cancer are really successful and changing all the time, I know a lot of ladies follow the " dr jane plant" diet and help book and have great results, the author had breast cancer 6 times and future looked very bleak but she is now healthy. Please keep posting Jackie as always love to hear from you and we are all here to help if we can. Your Cyprus holiday sounds lovely, a nice trip to look forward to, my friend has one of those bullet juicers and swears by hers, she also says wheatgrass is a great , healthy supplement to mix with your veg etc . I try not to have too much dairy in my diet so I have soya milk. X
Well, I had a blooming awful day today-last night O/H was up all night with extreme pain from acid reflux and gall bladder problems , so had no sleep at all, hardly functioned today as so tired and then I did something really stupid, I tidied up all my old magazines and threw them in my wheely bin just before the truck arrived to empty the rubbish, hours later I realised amongst those magazines was my ipad and it is now crushed somewhere on a rubbish tip! I feel so stupid and angry with myself. Spent the afternoon crying with frustration and then had to go and have radiotherapy and then on to son and daughter in laws for dinner!
Rosie, good things are moving in radiotherapy! And yet another inflation- poor you, good you get your car back though, have a nice weekend, hope you are not too sore.
Wild purl, you too have a relaxing weekend and hope you finish your blanket!
I hope to egg some sleep tonight-O/H been referred for a scan on gall bladder soon, so if it's not me being ill, then it's him, what a bloody year.

[rosie14]

Jackie I am so pleased you have come back to us we have all been thinking about you. Cancer treatments are improving all the time and treatments and drugs are being found to deal with different cancers. So many patients have proved their oncologist wrong and continue to live a good quality of life. My sister has friend who is just about 50 and 3 years ago she had breast cancer which then spread into several of her organs and she was given a very bleak outlook. She has a teenage son. She is now blossoming on a new tablet form of chemo and her cancer is under control.
I am glad you have booked a holiday and in Cyprus! The weather here is just right at the moment plenty of sunshine blue skies and dry. Temperatures top 20's. Of course it could break any day BUT is is short lived. When it rains it pours but only for a short time. Where abouts in Cyprus are you staying? If you are near Paphos there are Pirate Boat trips on the Jolly Rodger. Our daughter husband and our 2 young grandchildren are coming in 2 weeks and I have booked the Jolly Roger for Monday 27th. Check it out on Paphos sea cruises website! If your son likes Pirates it's a must!
Do keep,posting on the board we are here for you Jackie. Xxx

[Jackie09]

Hello everyone,

I'm sorry I haven't posted for a while - I didn't want to dampen the tone with my worries. I had another appointment with the onc, who just echoed what the surgeon had said. I asked about outlook, and using a predict tool, I'm going to be lottery winning lucky to see my little boy finish his schooling. My mind has been whirling over these past weeks, with some very dark times, but I am starting to come out of the other side.

I am currently having physio, as my ANC has left me with restricted movement. I was gripping the table so hard this morning while she was massaging me, I snapped a nail - after all of my efforts to keep them! I suppose it was lifting anyway!

We have booked a holiday to Cyprus in 2 weeks - so lots of weather up-dates Rosie please.

We have also invested in a nutri-bullet and I can't speak highly enough of it. I'm not great at eating veg, so this is ideal for me! Spinach, kale, green tea - anything goes in it and luckily, a banana masks the taste of just about anything! We are also exploring alternatives to milk. We've tried almond milk and now we're onto oat milk!
Hope the weather is fine for us all this weekend to enjoy. Love to all x x

[rosie14]

Evening everyone! Well I have my tattoos ready for the radiotherapy my next appointment at Nicosia is Wednesday when they will check the mapping and tattoos ..... Then hopefully I will get cracking! When I went to the oncology department and asked for my oncologist the receptionist said he wasn't in today!!!! I spoke to him 2 days ago on the phone to arrange it. Will try again on Wednesday!
DH has gone to school to the disco I dropped off at home to feed dog and take her out, DH and head of sec school picking me up in a couple of hours to go for a meal. Oh how could I forget I have been for an inflation on the left and he said we will do one more!!!! It's always one more! I bet he tell me to come back after rads are finished and he will just put one more in each side!!!' DH did ask me if I was sure I was satisfied he didn't want me to be disappointed. I asked him if he was in a plot with Dr S to get me blown up for Christmas?
Getting my car back in the morning Wildpurl. Hope you enjoyed your short day at work and do hope they won't keep,you waiting too long to inform you of your next role- you sound very employable with all your skills!
Hope you enjoy your Friday evening everyone- who is having a little tipple?

[Wildpurl]

Morning Rosie, gosh a busy day for you but very positive as getting your radiotherapy sorted out and will be good also to check your heart and find out when you can start herceptin.
I hope you don't have to wait too long to get your car back!

[rosie14]

Good Morning ladies!
Off to Nicosia soon form CT planning meeting and visit to oncologist to see if he thinks my heart has recovered enough from chemo drugs to now take herceptin! Then supposed to be going to Limassol at 4,30 on way back for inflation on non rads side. We have a disco starting at school at 6pm and DH really needs to be there also my car needs picking up so,may have to cancel and go Monday. All these appointments!!!!!
Hope you all have a Good Friday and that OH is feeling much better Joan.
I am sure you will get the blanket finished at the weekend Wildpurl.
Hope all goes smoothly today for you Lovewine is that 3 or 4 done now?

[Wildpurl]

Evening everyone, well it is Thursday evening so nearly the weekend, Friday being a short day where I work. It is still quite uncertain what I will be doing next year but I expect I will find a new role, at the moment nothing has been confirmed so will have to wait and see.
Nice to hear from you Joan and glad you enjoyed your holiday, hope your DH recovers soon.

Rosie I felt the same as you last weekend when I went for my shopping trip, just needed so many things especially bras now my size has stabilised. It was good to get some nice things to wear. You will enjoy opening your parcel when your daughter arrives. It's a pain about the radio sessions breaking up your day with your family visiting, but a good idea to incorporate some days out in the same area. The camels sound fun!
I'm sure you will feel more independent when you are driving again, too.

Lovewine I'm glad the radiotherapy is going smoothly but imagine it is very disruptive, at least it's not for too long. It's good that you are planning more time for your own interests, getting that balance right is so important. I just read an article in the Harvard Business Review about research which shows if people take breaks at work, enjoy their work and don't work too long hours, and have a good work life balance they are far more productive and creative.

Cassie those treatments sound nice. I am going to book a massage and facial with my beautician I think, I could do with something really relaxing.

The blanket is nearly finished but I'm too tired to crochet this evening so maybe tomorrow I will finally get it done.

[rosie14]

Good evening Cassie glad you have been having some relaxing therapies. I felt the,same about reflexology as you I don't like having my feet touched. Fortunately it was mainly massage and not stroking! I have to say it helped with my tingling toes and fingers following chemo,and surgery. I wonder if she can work wonders on my tissue expander discomfort?!
Hope you get some advice on your cording.
Hope the weather dries up,soon!
Wildpurl I have looked at the online courses briefly and there are 2 or 3 I,am quite interested in. Will delve into it a bit more over the weekend.
Hope you all have a good evening!

[Lovewine]

Evening ladies, cassie sounds good to have nice, relaxing therapy today, good also you are beginning to feel more normal, I found it helped to work through chemo/ radio etc, I quite like the routine and normality of it.

Regarding astronomy and solar system, just for something quick and interesting you can google -google sky maps and there are lots of free apps on iTunes for solar system etc.

[Cassie86]

Hello Ladies,

I hope you are all OK, I have just go back from a massage at the McMillan Centre which was very nice, it was the second one I have had there and a couple of weeks ago I had some reflexology which I enjoyed more than I expected, I don't really like me feet being touched by anyone.

The therapist recommended that I should speak to the specialist nurse regarding the cording that I have been left with after chemo, but there was nobody available, I left a voicemail, so lets see if I get any response, if not I will try again on the 16th when I go for my post radiotherapy one month check up.

Joan the hospital gave me aqueous cream while I was having therapy, but I must admit I did not have any side effects at all from the radiotherapy not untill the targeted therapy in week 5 then the toasted boob look started and it was also sore underneath so they advised aloe vera gel, just like when you have severe sunburn I guess and the hospital gave me some foam pads to stick underneath the breast in the fold.

Thank god it all finished with now I just have a rather leathery brown oblong dry patch on my right side where the radiotherapy was targeted, honestly I can say the surgery and the radiotherapy for me were a piece of cake but the chemo was not good at all.

I was luckier than most no nails falling of, I used almond oil regularly, no polish at all, I did not loose all of my hair, about a third I would say, the mouth and taste was awful but this is par for the course I am told, my dentist last week said I was very lucky to have such healthy gums after chemo! I have put a stone in weight on though which I am not happy about but dare not diet just yet, I think my body still needs time to recover as I still get tired when walking for more than an hour or so and I have been working for most of the time through everything, just taking a few days of for each cycle then returning to work.

The weather is awful here in London intermittently peeing down and very windy, have a good evening all Cassie.

[joan47]

Sorry to hear some of you have been on the grumpy step. Like the idea of Wildpurl knitting a blanket to keep you warm. Bit I suppose this forum acts as a sort of virtual blanket.

Wildpurl. Moons of the solar system. Sounds very advanced. I have signed up fir a day course intro to astronomy so hopefully will be a little better informed when I look at the sky. Sorry you are feeling doubly anxious about your future. Although just about everyone tries to reassure us about the good survival rates for breast cancer I guess in all our minds there is the nagging worry as to whether we will be among the small percentage who won't be around in 10 years time. I hope your fears about forcible retirement prove unfounded; I think we have all admired your determination to carry on working through your treatment so it would seem particularly cruel. Is it just a fear or do you have reason to suspect it might happen? (Having reached some earlier posts I think that is probably the case, sorry.)

Lovewine, agree with pre cancer not making time for things other than work. Having attended a few courses to keep me sane during treatment I certainly don't want to give that up. Glad radiotherapy going well. What have they suggested you use to protect your skin? It must be a great relief that your son and his girlfriend have agreed to part. No doubt he will need lots of support to cope with his loss but at lead the no longer has the terrible uncertainty. What a shame to be missing your week in Cornwall.

TiJ sorry to hear about your anxieties about your boys. I hope older ones Wobblies are very temporary and younger ones injury is not too bad.

Cassie. I'm a sporadic knitter too. I have knitted in the past but often got bored and ended up with half finished garments languishing in a cupboard. Got really enthusiastic when my daughter was expecting her first child. Felt I had to make a shawl , then started churning out small garments. Enthusiasm now faded, partly because they often got shrunk. Glad your skin is recovering from radiotherapy. Did you find anything to help? Sorry you are still finding it difficult to sleep. I thoroughly recommend a foreign holiday, especially somewhere sunny. feel it has really given me a boost.

Lisa, glad work going well, your radio appt time sounds very convenient. Unfortunately I had to,ask for morning appts so we can be free to collect granddaughter from school so they are at 10.50. Not going to be able to fit much else in and the car parking will be horrendous. Ah well. Minor complaints in the great scheme of things.

Rosie, glad you are feeling a bit more cheerful. I think I would share your irritation with your neighbour, especially when she doesn't out herself out to visit you.

OH now woken up so must come off this and be sympathetic.

Good days to everyone.

[rosie14]

Hola Joan sorry to hear that OH isn't too well as Lovewine says I hope it won't be for too long! Are you returning tomorrow or have you got a little longer? Glad you have enjoyed your time so far!
DH is convinced my cancer was induced by my weight loss. I am glad to have lost the weight and got myself into a healthy eating regime or the last 6 months would have been a disaster!

[Lovewine]

Joan, sounds like you are having a lovely time, hope your nursing skills are not called on for too long!! Afraid mine are pretty non existent. Enjoy rest of your holiday, good that you have the stamina to enjoy the sightseeing too.

Rosie, what a successful shopping morning, of course I forgot about your daughter visiting soon, even nicer laden with your goodies!! Yes I always feel surprisingly better when done some shopping too! You have done very well with your weight loss, how satisfying to have achieved to lose 3 stone last year, can understand you want to keep it off after all that effort!

[joan47]

Hola from (very) sunny Barcelona. OH not too well (he suffers from labyrinthitis and walking down a spiral staircase with hundreds of steps in Sagrada Familia this morning unfortunately brought it on. ) So he's in bed and I'm providing TLC, hopefully just for a few hours, more than that might be testing. So far had a wonderful time and stamina has held up better than expected -amazing what the prospect of a bit of culture and a few tapas and pastries will do! Fortunately when we get back I will have the excuse of radiotherapy induced fatigue to exempt me from too much housework!

Am going to post this now and will respond to as many of the latest postings as I can.

[rosie14]

Just spent 120 pounds on M@S online on very necessary items! 2 x nighties, pack of 2 post surgery bras, jeggings, tunic and post op swimming costume!!!! Being delivered to my daughter to bring out in 2 weeks! Hope she won't need another suitcase checked on!!!!!
Feeling much better!!!!!!

[rosie14]

I agree Lovewine we have much to learn from each other about getting the most out of life! I have never had the luxury of brains pace or time to,forward plan before! It's very sweet of you to offer to post on, I can send to my daughter and she can bring with her. Thanks for your kind offer though! X

[Lovewine]

That sounds a great idea Rosie! A spot of clothes shopping always lifts the spirits! Maybe that's the answer to spending good time with your family is to incorporate day trips with the radio, it only takes about 10 mins from start to finish including taking top half of clothes off and on, sounds like you are getting organised with some good ideas for days out, am with you on the camel ride! I think it's really annoying when on holiday or entertaining when planning things without thinking in advance because everyone says " I don't mind what we do!" And then end up doing nothing constructive at all! Wildpurl had best idea when in wales with planning days out and meals and then you know were you are!
I think marks and spencer deliver abroad and also have you looked at m&co, they are better now and not so frumpy!! I think they may deliver abroad too! If you find something you like I could order it and post on to you if they don't deliver!
Anyway off to work now and then the delight of the hospital again! X

[rosie14]

Morning Lovewine I think the travelling and disruption is what I am dreading too! Also I am fairly sure it's going to be rolling when my daughter and family are here! She is here Saturday to Saturday. They don't arrive until 9. 50 pm Sat and go back at 6pm following Sat so the only whole day we will get is Sunday. I am very resentful about this! DH said he would take me some days so I can be home sooner and not have to wait for the bus. But it will still be a 4 hr round trip. Yesterday I planned some trips we could do because we don't want to be messing about where we are going when I get back. I thought we could take them with us a couple of days as there is a camel park en route that sounds quite fun. Although you won't catch me on a camel I've done it twice!!! Grandma will take the photos!
Limassol area is,quite interesting there is Kolossi Castle and a beach where they had a pelican not sure if he is still there!
We have a forest not far from us where there is a BBQ area so may do that one afternoon.
Just spent 2 hrs sorting out my clothes filled a bag for the charity shop and one for the recycling. I still had some size 18/20's ! Kept 16's but these are still roomy! Def size 12 on top and 14 below!
Methinks I may look for some clothes online that deliver to Cyprus!
Hope all goes well this afternoon! X

[Lovewine]

Morning Rosie, I know exactly what you mean about not being in control! It feels like your body doesn't belong to you anymore and has somehow become part of the hospital system! I think it's very difficult to get back into what was normal as it will never be "normal" now will it!! Once your car situation is resolved and also herceptin begins you will have a much better idea of appointment times to plan a little! I will have a year of herceptin every 3 weeks and sure yours is the same too. I must say though, am facing radio no 3 today and I am already fed up with the travelling and disruption to the day! Take care , have a rest today before the onslaught of tomorrow's appointment! X

[rosie14]

I think I will feel better after tomorrow knowing a bit more about the onward treatment. Our friends in Dubai have invited us to stay with them during February half term but can't commit due to possibility of herceptin or second surgery whim he know wants to leave until the new year to give me time to get over radiotherapy. I am glad you thinking about then right balance of work and time for you Lovewine. When I am fit I hope to return to aqua fit and restart yoga haven't done it since coming to Cyprus as the nearest one was a day session when of course I was at work. May return to SW also to ensure I don't put weight on as lost over 3 stone in 2013 and don't want to put that back on especially as I don't have much on my top half anymore!
You certainly have a varied interests Wildpurl I was always interested in the solar system when teaching it to the children. We had a wonderful full moon last night that was still out when I pulled the blinds up at 6am lighting up the outside world a lovely sight!
I think my problem is I have me been out of action since the beginning of chemo at the end of March and it has just gone on too long and I can't yet see an end to it. I know I should be in school doing more but with the transport issue this week can't do much. Next week I will have my car and I will start driving but of course I may or may not be starting radiotherapy!!!! It's all these unknowns like both of you I like to be in control and I am absolutely hating not being!
Have a good day !

[Wildpurl]

Knitting, Pilates and Badminton sounds like a good set of hobbies Lovewine - plus browsing antique shops of course!
I think taking up knitting again is a good idea rosie, it's very easy to pick up and put down when you want. Fingers crossed you will be able to start Herceptin soon as well.

Sorry you have had some worries with your sons Tlj, hope everything is settling down now.
I have been to Body Balance again this evening, it is calming and energising, very enjoyable. Earlier I got an email from Future Learn about new courses so I have signed up for one on the moons of the Solar System, which starts in February. Looks interesting!

[Lovewine]

Sounds like a busy couple of days Rosie, hopefully you can begin your herceptin soon and have another weapon in armoury !! An online course does sound very interesting too, must say I realise how much I was missing before cancer, I was working so hard I had no time for myself at all, now am working part time I am definitely going to focus on " me" for a change and do some hobbies if possible- might take up Pilates and badminton!

[rosie14]

Lovewine glad your second session went ok lets hope it continues.
I spent some time today exploring knitting items on the internet and added some to my Amazon wish list, the kids use this for Christmas presents. One of the items was a book! Tomorrow I am going to spend time looking at the online course sites that Wildpurl suggested.
I managed to get an appointment with the oncologist whilst in Nicosia on Friday to see if he is happy enough with the repair of my heart to start herceptin! I won't be bored on Friday!!!!
Hope you all managed a better day today!

[Lovewine]

Tij, sorry to hear your son had bit of a wobble, think it's maybe quite understandable after the first excitement of being away has worn off, hope things settle down soon, and your other son too, hope it's not as bad as you think, they are always a worry aren't they- my youngest at 23 has given me a lot of concern over his break up with G/F.
Rosie, maybe buy a start up knitting kit online in something fairly easy to start with!! Hope you havnt had a too boring day today.
Had radiotherapy no 2 and again went in very promptly, so hoping it continues!!

[rosie14]

Oh that's a good idea Lovewine to add it to list maybe I will add a start up knitting kit also! My knitting needles never made it to Cyprus!
Tlj sorry to hear that you son had a wobbly - maybe he is feeling a little off colour and how unfortunate that your other son may have broken his finger. Children are always worry whatever age they are and probably make up a lot of our stress!
I will see if I can download The Educators and let you know if I have success! Good luck with the paper work!

[Tlj63]

Morning ladies, sorry some of you have returned to the grumpy step. Maybe there is something in the atmosphere at the moment. I didn't have a great day yesterday. Nothing to do with breast cancer thank God. My son had a wobble at his new school and the housemaster was really worried about him. It was such a shock as I had spoken to him the day before and he had seemed so happy. He's not saying he wants to come home, I think he is just feeling a bit low. Then school nurse rang from my other son's school to say he had hurt his finger in the playground. I think it may be broken and he is supposed to be auditioning for an orchestra in 2 weeks time.
Life certainly has it's ups and downs. Rosie, you may be interested in a series on radio 4 called the educators. Can you download the podcast and have a listen. I would very curious to know your opinion as a teacher. The chap that set up Khan Academy was on the series which made me look up his website. It's actually really interesting to see how he teaches.
It's raining here today which doesn't help lift the mood. I was hoping to go on a bike ride today but it's too wet at the moment. So I will have to face the boring paperwork instead. I've got an enormous pile of paper to be filed!
Hope we can all get ourselves off the grumpy step by the end of the day.

[Lovewine]

Rosie, just a quick thought- to fill the days until you back at school, why not take up knitting now weather cooler!! Must say I find it quite relaxing, am not all that fast or proficient as havnt done it for many years, like you was very focused on job I didn't have any spare time for hobbies etc.x

[Lovewine]

Think we will need a king size blanket for all of us now on the step!! Rosie, Linda's book is available on kindle as have just added it to my wish list whist I decide to read it !! No rain this morning , but very autumnal!
Wildpurl, would love to see a picture of your blanket too! What a good idea of posting on the profile page, hadn't thought of that!! Have a good day, sorry to hear of your worries at work, really hope they get resolved soon and you can have another position suitable for you.

[rosie14]

Wildpurl can you make a blanket to keep us warm on the grumpy low step?!
Thanks for the information will have a little look!

[Wildpurl]

Rosie my two courses have been with Future Learn. There is also an organisation called coursera which does them, both are online and can be found by googling.

I am the same about long term things at the moment, I feel I can't take it for granted I will be around. Right now I am worrying both about possibly not having a job and being forced to retire early and about working and maybe not surviving long enough to retire. It's doing my head in! So move over on that grumpy, feeling low step and make room for another!

I think I can post pictures in the gallery area of my profile, when the blanket is done I will see if I can post a picture of it.

Lovewine I have a sweater to knit next and also another blanket I am crocheting for my daughter to finish.

[rosie14]

Morning Lovewine I can't think further than next week either! each day is so long! I wondered about reading Lynda's book also I might see if your can get it for the kindle.
DH gets mad with me also about making plans and says if you wait and see you won't do anything!
Hope it is dry this morning for you to,walk the dogs!

[rosie14]

Oh sorry everyone I appear to made us all examine our inner selves!
Wildpurl you are right we must not focus on those that have lost the battle we are the soldiers heading for victory! I was very annoyed by my next door neighbour by plastering this on her facebook when she has someone living next door that has had db mx!!! She never pops by to see me she stops her car for a brief chat if she sees me out.
Maybe I will look for an online course Wildpurl what's best way to search?
I hope you won't have to wait too long to find out about your next post.
Well done with the blanket it's a pity you can't post us a picture of it!
Cassie it's good to hear from you I think you are right when my car is fixed I will have the freedom to come and go as I please at school. The problem is it's all I have ever known I have never had time to do other things so now I am lost!
I am sorry you are still having problems sleeping. I am sleeping better than I did with chemo. At least I can get back to sleep after going to the loo whereas once I was out when having chemo that was the end of sleep! Glad you are recovering from radiotherapy and do hope that the results from the thyroid won't be too long!
Then maybe you can book that holiday!

[Lovewine]

Morning everyone, cassie, hope all goes well with your thyroid results, fingers crossed you can get results quickly to ease the stress of waiting too long, know what you mean about not wanting to book holidays abroad, I feel exactly the same! Can't think any further than next week right now- went into argos yesterday to buy a new steam generator iron and assistant asked if I wanted to take out the 3 year breakdown cover on top of yearly standard guarantee and found myself thinking no it will be a waste of £60.00 as might not be around !! O/H gets quite cross and tells me off for being defeatist and pessimistic, but I feel like that at the moment and definitely joining you Rosie on the " feeling low and fed up " step! I am really tired of everyone telling me that I should be happy chemo and surgery are over and back to normal we can all go now!!! Don't quite think so.
Anyway, going to walk dogs now so maybe exercise and fresh air will kick in and lift my spirits somewhat!!
Wildpurl, are you going to knit something else when blanket is finished?- it is very rewarding finishing something like a blanket which takes so long to knit. Know what you mean about focusing on people losing the battle on various sites like FBI etc, I only come on this forum as find it more uplifting and positive!! Yesterday I found it very sad watching lynda Bellingham promoting her book and knowing she is terminally ill, am tempted to read her book but not sure it might make me feel worse!
Rosie, hope you have a not too bad day today, not long until your daughter and grandchildren visit and by then you will be feeling much better I am sure!
Have a good day everyone! X

[Cassie86]

Morning Ladies,

Rosie sorry to hear you are feeling lonely I guess its the isolation. that this horrible disease brings on, hopefully when your car is fixed and you have your family around you and you are feeling a little better things will improve its just a long hard slog, I know.

Wilpurl you always sound so industrious with your knitting, I have made so many things in the past but I have lost interest at the moment I am more of a sporadic knitter making serveral items then nothing for a couple of years, I have knitted a couple of blankets and in my teens crocheted one, it is very rewarding,

I am still havibg trouble sleeping which is a real pain, my CT guided aspiration from my thyroid went OK on Monday and I will just have to be a patient, patient and wait for the results now, it all seemed very relaxed , so fingers crossed. My boob is just recovering from the radiotherapy, still a bit burned looking but no longer sore.

I understand what you all feel about being in limbo, although I have been back at work for some time now I have not taken holiday leave because I fell guilty about all the time I have taken off for sick leave this year and I also I cannot bring myself to book a holiday abroad anywhere until I feel this horrible journey is over, which it may never be, who knows, it seems one thing after another.

Enough with the moaning for me today....

The weather does not help either its still completely dark outside and pouring with rain

[Wildpurl]

Good morning, glad your radiotherapy appointment went smoothly Lovewine, I hope they all go as quickly and efficiently.
Rosie, I have to agree with you that the awareness of breast cancer by taking your bra off doesn't seem very well thought out. People mean well, but a lot of things posted about breast cancer on FB are quite annoying or insensitive IMO. In particular they often seem to focus on those who have "lost the battle" and I am one who does not like that terminology much.

I also understand your feeling lonely and in limbo on your own in the house, I felt the same, particularly when I couldn't do everything I would usually do. Maybe you could find an online course you would enjoy? There seem to be loads of good free ones available!

I have now had confirmation that my reduced working hours will start from the beginning of November, which is good. The change in my job is starting to sink in though, and the uncertainty is now worrying me. Just as I had got back to work and was enjoying it, so I am hoping that I will know soon what I will move on to.

I am on the last round of the border to my blanket and it will be finished! It is looking very nice if I do say so myself....

[rosie14]

Oh I have just gone back to the facebook page and it is October 13th . She has posted back , " I think it's to raise awareness!" I have come off the page before I post something I will regret!!'

[rosie14]

Yes thank goodness for TV and dogs Lovewine! I think I have got myself into a feeling very sorry for myself mode! A neighbour has just annoyed me by sharing on facebook a support breast cancer day but taking off your bra for the day on October 10th!!!!I am afraid I posted a comment back, "what is the point in this?" On October 10 th I will be at the radiology dept in Nicosia in the morning and Limassol at the clinic in the afternoon for what I hope will be the final inflation! I guess I am being over sensitive normally this would not bother me!!!

[Lovewine]

Rosie, know what you mean about being in limbo, I felt a little bit like that too- seems we are always waiting for something else to start on the treatment front, I think when you are at this stage we are at now it's beginning to really get tiring and tedious! Also I think being on your own all day is hard, my O/H works strange hours and I spend many evenings alone, which I find can be very lonely.
T

[rosie14]

Lovewine glad your appointment went smoothly. I am glad your son has taken the parting better than expected, he probably realised it would be the outcome.
I am sorry that you and OH are not in Cornwall this week it must be especially annoying that he has the week off. I know what you mean about having a low point I seem to be having one this week also. I am finding it very lonely all day every day by myself and I feel in limbo waiting for,radiotherapy!DH got his car back today and left mine there as we have stuck part of the body together with tape bits are falling off and it needs a service! It won' t be back until the end of the week at the earliest!

[Lovewine]

Evening everyone, my appointment was very efficient and didn't even sit down in waiting room- was called straight in, they seem very prompt. Because I am on clinical trial I had some blood taken, but all very straightforward!
Update on son and G/F situation: they have agreed to part amicably and stay " friends" , he is very sad but I think now there has been a definite split now , he seems to have come to terms with it better than I thought! Hope it's not the calm before the storm!!
My O/H has the week off from work this week, booked off months ago and we should be down in fowey, Cornwall on our annual trip down there, so am feeling pretty fed up that we are not there, I think this week I have hit a bit of a low point, maybe the start of herceptin and radiotherapy all of which really hits home when you are at the hospital every day!!
Wildpurl, how are you getting on this week? Hope you managed to sort out your garden for the winter! You will have more time for knitting now during these months when not so busy in the garden!
Rosie, must be nice to be still enjoying nice, warm weather, hope you are not too uncomfortable this week, at least last one this week!

[rosie14]

Hi Lisa glad to hear you are doing well and balancing work and home. Weather still good here don't for get your sun cream!
Hope your appointment is on time Lovwine!

[Lovewine]

Hi ladies, yes Lisa my appts are at 4.10 every day this week! Hoping for a quick getaway, am rather nervous about it! Good that you are finding some normality and not long for your holiday now!
Rosie, yes indeed it was a quite day on here yesterday, hopefully other ladies are doing well and are busy, good you have your ct planning appt, hopefully not long for you to start now too!
Off to work now and then hospital later!

[rolicarpit]

Morning everyone ... Happy belated birthday Wildpurl, sounds as if you had a nice time. Rosie - 26 degrees sounds lovely, just paying the balance on our holiday today, very excited! Lovewine, hope your rads go well today, I'm sure it will, are all your appts at about 4 ish, mine were and it was such a good time as you can pretty much drive straight in the car park at 4, most of the time I was in and out within the free 30 minutes car parking too, they were never late, the only time was when the machine broke down which was halfway through my treatment but other than that I found it all very efficient with no side effects for the first 3 weeks at least and then only a bit a skin soreness .... Just a pain going everyday but it flies by.

I'm doing ok, increasing my work hours again this week to try 3 full days and a morning ... It's fine but tiring, enjoying the fact I don't have to go today.

hope everyone else is well

Speak soon
Lisa

[rosie14]

Morning Wildpurl it's good to know that your boss,is searching for other opportunities for you. With you varied skills I should imagine you an asset to any business! Good luck with the job description!
I hope the rain stops soon!
I have a CT planning appointment on Friday so I guess they will then give me a start date then.