Anyone due to start chemo April 14??

[Wildpurl]

Well I am back from seeing the consultant. She wasn't at all bothered by the eczema. The thing that was seen on the ultrasound is right on the seam where the strattice is joined to the pectoral muscle, so she felt that it could easily be a normal part of that reconstruction. She also said it would be an unusual place for a recurrence. However, cancer can't be ruled out without a biopsy, so I have had a core biopsy this afternoon and will get the results next week.
The consultant came down and showed the radiographer what she had felt and made sure this is what was showing up and would be biopsied.
I have got my fingers crossed that everything is alright, I feel happier now I know a bit more about what and where was seen on the scan, and will try to put it out of my mind until I see her again, but I know I will be super stressed beforehand.
Before then, though, I have a number of things to look forward to. My FIL is arriving on Friday for a visit and on Saturday we have him, O.H's youngest, my son and his GF and OH's cousin, who has recently moved down South, coming to dinner before going out to see our village bonfire and fireworks, which are one of the well known displays and a really fabulous sight. So I am looking forward to that and I am also looking forward to some time off and having a rest.
I have been thinking about the post traumatic stress and I am concluding that while everything was going smoothly, I felt as if I was getting back to normal, but really I was not back to normal deep down. When something seemed at risk, I think it made me feel as though everything was under threat again and normal was going to collapse. So my coping is rather fragile. What do others think?

[Lovewine]

Hi everyone, tulamo, hope you are feeling a little better now, at least today isn't quite so wet and windy! My border collies won't forego their walks even in a howling gale, they certainly play me up if not exercised!! The horse of the year show sounds a lovely day if not a tiring one though, maybe next year you can enjoy it more when you are stronger! Must say I envy you your donks, I love them, I had a horse in my twenties and really enjoyed the experience, how many do you have?..I also echo Rosie's words in saying please offload on here as much as you want- we all understand, I would have gone mad with worry and anxiety without the support of everyone here. I have my 2nd herceptin injection tomorrow after radiotherapy, I was also forgotten in the system with my heart scan and herceptin and had to ask about it too!
Rosie, how did your trek go today? Are you feeling tired, expect you are, must say I am feeling very tired, but think it's more to do with daily trips to hospital for various procedures rather than actual radiotherapy itself, my skin is ok at the moment, after radiotherapy I saw the oncologist for a update on herceptin and unless any problems I am not due to see him age again until January, beginning to feel a little anxious about that now as the security blanket won't be there!! I am with Wildpurl on the counselling front, if I don't feel a little more settled soon I think I will try and see Macmillan or coping with cancer which is here in Leicestershire. Do you ladies think we will ever feel like our old selves ever again? Don't think I will!!
Hope everyone is ok today, Wildpurl, Kirstie, cassie, Tij, Lisa, Jackie, Joan and sorry if I missed anyone off !!
Rosie, it will be great to meet up next year, certainly something to look forward too, you must be excited at impending daughters visit and also meeting up with your friend on Friday.

[rosie14]

Sorry you have been unwell Tulamo it's jolly rotten luck you had a cold these things take us much longer to get over. I hope you enjoyed the horse of the year show after the huge effort you made to get there! This board is for sharing our worries and frustrations they are not moans and I know that all the ladies using this board would agree. It's a place where we can come and others really understand us. I agree with you all about the emotional and physical coping hasn't really kicked in fully. When anyone says anything to even slightly upset us it seems like the end of the world and Wildpurl and Kirstie both have major work worries which is going to really upset their apple cart. Do the Macmillan nurses offer counselling?
My friend that has had ovarian cancer is out in Cyprus for the next 5 weeks we are seeing her and her husband on Friday night for a meal so I am really looking forward to that and of course Saturday is the day when my daughter and family come out for a week. It's things like this that keep me going. I don't look too far ahead!
Hope Lovewine and Joan are still suffering no side effects from radiotherapy? Hope Kirstie got on ok at work and with the driving. Trust Jackie landed safely and is now enjoying a much needed holiday. Lisa hope all is going well with yours and you found some reasonable places to eat out!
Tlj you must be reall excited your son comes home tomorrow! Cassie hope you are not working too hard .
Lovewine, Wildpurl and myself would really love to meet up next summer. We would love the rest of you lovely ladies to be there to let me know if you are up for it and I will try and coordinate it after the new year! The first job is to find out where everyone lives and which is going to be the most convenient meeting place. I will be in the UK some time in July.
Well,it's 6pm here and it's going dark already I am not looking forward to the dark nights next week but the lighter mornings will be easier!!

[Wildpurl]

Hello tulamo, good to hear from you, sorry you struggled after your last chemo and were ill too. I felt the last lot of side effects went on for ever and indeed are still going on. I agree with post traumatic stress, lovewine, OH said to me yesterday - you don't seem to be able to cope with anything at the moment. I know what he means, I feel in a constant state of barely controlled anxiety. I am considering seeing a counsellor if it does not improve soon, but will see if my week off helps first.

[tulamo]

Wrote last post this afternoon but forgot to post it I didnt leave my poor little donks out half the night in the wind and rain !

Wildpurl hope your appointment with consultant puts your mind at rest and glad to hear the job issues may be resolved in a good way.

I agree the stress of the diagnosis and treatment comes out later I know I havent begun to deal with my surgeries on an emotional level as I was dealing with chemo right after,  the whole thing is a nightmare I will talk to a counselor if needs be I want to move on and live life to the full and not in fear, hope I can do that.

Well got to do an online shop or we all starve tomorrow !

[tulamo]

Hello all, havent posted for some time as I have been feeling so ill since last chemo, side effects have lasted forever mouth still not right but the real killer was the stinking cold I caught just days after last treatment it completely floored me but I still had to do stuff for sons 3rd birthday and went to NEC as had ticket for Horse of Year Show, had bought ticket in February before recurrence of cancer found. Also was chance to meet up with mum and sister so dragged myself there, a 2 hour drive and tried to pace myself through the day. Unfortunately got really bad indigestion and had to leave earlier than normally would but overall glad I made the effort.  It did wipe me out so doing little birthday tea for son 2 days later was pretty exhausting. 

Have had the cold 2 weeks now and chesty cough but definitely slowly on the mend and knowing I dont have to go for chemo on Thursday is a great feeling. Hospital managed to forget my herceptin treatment,  given I know how chaotic they are I called last week to check and no appointment had been made for my treatment. As I've already missed one treatment due to their ineptitude I was less than impressed if I am not proactive nothing happens. Having it Friday now.

Moan over sorry for being a pain, it sounds like everyone else has far more  on their plates than me what with Rosies expanders and radiotherapy treks, Wildpurls job worries and stress, Lovewines sons worries and Joans dodgy nails plus you're both also doing rads too.

Jackie I am ashamed of myself for moaning given what you've had to deal with recently, hope you have a fab holiday.

Lisa hope you find a better balance of work hours, stressful jobs like yours really take it out of you. Cassie you sound like work  has been hectic  I cant even think about going back to work I am a solicitor work is very stressful and demanding not up to that yet.

Hope life starts getting easier for everyone soon.

Well weather is awful today gales and torrential rain, best go and rescue the donkeys from the field before they start complaining loudly !!

Tulamo

[Lovewine]

I really hope so Rosie, maybe Birmingham airport? That's not far away either from East Midlands area!
Good luck with your trek to rads tomorrow!

[rosie14]

Lovewine I don't know whether she was flying in to Paphos or Larnaca. As she is staying the Larnaca side of the island that would make sense. But can only see one flight arrived at Paphos,from EMA and it landed at 1.10pm. Bare in mind that would be 11.10 in UK and it is usually 4.5 hr flight she would have had an early morning start and she said she was going for her appointment first! Maybe she went from another airport? I am sure she will be safely here now or soon?

[Lovewine]

Kirstie must say I love your photo with your sister, your hair looks great!!

[Lovewine]

That's good Wildpurl you have some idea of what's going on and your O/H is not in the immediate problem and hopefully will be ok. Yes we all have some form of post traumatic stress- I am convinced thats what it is!! We plodded on through chemo and surgery and got on with it and now treatment is nearing the end I think it hits you like a slap in the face!! Certainly has for me.
Rosie, Jackie lives not too far from me I think- which I assume would be either Derbyshire or Nottinghamshire maybe? So would say she may be flying from East Midlands airport or Robin Hood airport, hope her flight departed ok, she really deserves a nice holiday .

[rosie14]

Wildpurl,I am glad that you have had an opportunity to,discuss your feelings about the employment with your boss and that OH situation isn't as grave as it could be. I hope,you manage to,get a much better nights sleep.
Let's hope,Jackie gets on her flight I see some have been cancelled due to the high winds you have had. Does anyone know which airport she was flying from? Can't remember where she lives!

[Wildpurl]

Evening all, so sorry to hear about your frustrating day wrt Herceptin appointment and the difficulties with the buses. It must seem like a very very long tedious journey, especially doing it every day, it is tiring just doing so much travelling.
Kirstie, lovely to see you back, I am impressed you are driving already, well done!
Lovewine I am sorry you are feeling anxious and having trouble sleeping. I am suffering a lot from anxiety at the moment and I think kirstie is right, this will come out for all of us in different ways. I spend a lot of time in tears at the moment too, the slightest thing, it really is not like me at all, but I also think it is feelings maybe not expressed during treatment finding their way out now.
I had a chat with my boss, basically the entire team I work within is being dismantled because of organisation changes, so he is working on a plan to redeploy us all. He said he will have more information in two weeks. I feel better that I have told him how I am feeling, and that he is doing what he can to help the situation.
OH's situation has also improved in that there are fewer people to be at risk, and the date is now the end of March next year. So I am feeling a bit less stressed this evening and very tired, I think an early night is called for.

[rosie14]

Yes Joan I was very annoyed as I had been very organised and marked off the date every three weeks and it just cleared our time away in the UK over Christmas. You can bet they will tell me to have it next week and it will fall right in the middle of our timeout of the country. I am so fed up with all the changing goal posts all the time. It's no wonder several of us are getting stressed.
My tissue expanders have been very tight and uncomfortable today DH thinks it may be due to,spending so much time on the bus.
Kirstie hope all goes well for you tomorrow at work!
Lovewine you made me smile again with your wig encounter I could just imagine how you felt when you saw it in the car mirror! I was reading your post and DH asked me what I was smiling at? He found it amusing too. We have to smile at these little mishaps we have or else we would go mad! Good luck with your Herceptin check tomorrow.
We all seem to be having a rough time at the moment, tomorrow is another day and I do hope it is a better day than we are anticipating! Thinking of all you! X

[Lovewine]

Wildpurl, I am really sorry you are so stressed at the moment, I hope you can get some answers this afternoon about your job and tomorrow too when you see consultant, there never seems to be a reprieve in the stress and worry at the moment does there, stress plays such a massive part in our physical health too as you know, so eczema is not surprising, be thinking of you.
I think my anxiety and lack of sleep is definitely linked to the daily hospital visits, just walking through the door with the word cancer centre fills me with dread, even though we all go to appointments so many times now, it doesn't get any easier! Hope your review goes well tomorrow. I was told the radiotherapy " mops up" any stray cells that might have fallen off during surgery- cells regenerate every 24 hours, so that's why we go every day, although am not sure if cancer cells respect Saturday and Sundays and decide not to replicate on the weekend!!! Apparently the radiation builds up more each time and stays in the body for about a year, the tiredness builds up over time as we can both relate too!
Rosie, what a rubbish day! How annoying too your herceptin is to be delayed, like you say - why give you an appointment date in the first place? I did smile at your mishap with clothing today, I have done it several times and because today is quite cold I wore a jumper and regretted it as couldn't yank over head easily and left the room with wig all " **bleep**-eyed" and had some funny looks until I looked in car mirror and noticed my fringe was very much over to the side!
Back in again tomorrow at 10.20 and then oncologist at 11.15, think that's for herceptin check up.

[Kirstie77]

Wildpurl, keeping my fingers crossed everything is going okay with your boss, sometime it's just crap xx

Rosie I don't envy you at all that bus journey sounds horrific, I worked from home today not that I did much work, they just are not including me, I feel more and more isolated by them - I'm sure I'm on the hit list. I'm going in tomorrow they can face me if nothing else !

Lovewine try not to worry too much, I think all our anxiety is going to start coming out in one way or another, I'm turning into a moody so and so xx

[joan47]

Wildpurl, life is certainly giving you some lemons at the moment. I hope your consultant is able to put your mind at rest and that the meeting with your boss is productive .

Rosie, how annoying about the delay on the Herceotin. I suppose when they gave you the appointment they assumed the approval would come through in time. Your radiotherapy trip sounds quite eventful, with you flashing your cleavage (I always wear something I can just pull over my head but then I do t bother with any headgear) then the crowded bus and then the air conditioning failure. In contrast today, for the first time my appt went smoothly, in fact I was called 10 minutes early and I was in and out in less than half an hour. Amazing. Hence more time than usual before heading off to collect granddaughter.

Cassie, your break sounds lovely, lots to see in that area, hope the weather is good to you.

Lovewine, sorry you are not sleeping well and having anxiety attacks. I guess it could be related to all the worry about your son of top of everything else. But maybe it is also linked to the radiotherapy, not necessarily physically, apart from the tiredness but going to the hospital every day is a constantbremindervthatvwe are being treated for a horrible disease. I have been having quite a few rather stupid anxiety dreams which I think might be connected. I have my review tomorrow. No signs of skin problems yet but when I mentioned today that I was feeling quite wobbly- legged they said I should mention it them.

Incidentally, do any if you know what radiotherapy does and how it works? I know chemo attacked the fast growing cells. Does radiotherapy do the same? Also why does it make you tired? I I asked a friend of ours who is a medical physicist and has worked in this field for years. His response was good question, don't know!

[Jo_BCC]

Hi wildpurl

If you need to talk to someone in confidence then please don't hesitate to call the helpline here, the staff are here to support you through this.  Calls to the helpline are free 0808 800 6000 lines open weekdays 9-5 and Saturdays 10-2.

Take care,

Jo, Moderator

[rosie14]

Oh Wildpurl I am so sorry that you are having this added stress. I hope your meeting with the boss will be positive at least you will know where you are instead of worrying about it. As for the rash lets hope it is just eczema. The fact the ultra sound revealed nothing untoward is encouraging. Hopefully in a couple of days it will have disappeared. If not you may have to re think the biopsy when you are feeling stronger just to eliminate anything more serious. Thinking of you this afternoon! X

[Wildpurl]

Afternoon all, I have asked for a meeting with my boss this afternoon to let him know how stressed I am and to see if there is anything I can do to search for a new role, as I would feel better if I could do something. It now looks as though one of my immediate team will also be at risk, which has upset me even more.

Tomorrow I have an appointment with my surgeon. Last week because of my stress levels I started to get eczema and some appeared on the treated breast. I went to see one of my surgeons registrars on Thursday to check it was nothing else. Of course my stress levels were through the roof at that point. She thought it was only eczema and an ultrasound revealed nothing untoward, much to my relief, but then the radiographer found something at the top of the breast she could not explain. She sent me for a mammogram, which did not show anything and then wanted to do a biopsy which I refused as I had had enough.

So tomorrow I am seeing my consultant to see if she can work out what it is. I think everything is probably alright, but this is not helping my stress levels. It is difficult to think about my week off at the moment.

[rosie14]

Just had a phone call from the oncology centre to say they are still waiting for approval for the herceptin and I can't have it tomorrow!!!!' Why did they give me an appointment in the first place????

[rosie14]

Good Afternoon everyone what busy days we all seem to be having!
Lovewine good gracious me 4000 pounds for a dose of herceptin I knew it was expensive but not that much!!!! Yes I am having infusion so it will be a cannula!
I hope your hat stayed on. I did your trick with my top today I thought I had opened enough buttons to get it over my head but it got stuck on the knot in the headscarf and I yanked a button off!!! I had to to then leave the dept flashing a man made cleavage !!!!!!
I am finding the bus journey quite lonely because they are all Cypriots and speaking Greek and I can only understand an odd word or two. The lady that I spoke to Wednesday must have finished because she is not on the bus this week. Two buses went today as lots got on at Limassol so,I knew there would be a scram for the first bus back at 11.00. Men do not give way to woman here! When in Rome....... I held my bag out with one arm and stretched the other so nobody could push in front of me! We hadn't gone far on the motorway and there was an awful noise and a dreadful smell the driver stopped the bus - the air conditioning had packed up. We went on our way without it eventually and managed to open some windows.
Cassie enjoy you short break in Cornwall! Polperro is also worth a visit.
Hope you are not finding the week too tiring Wildpurl hold on to the fact that you have next week off.

[Lovewine]

Cassie, I envy you going to st Austell, we usually stay about 3 miles out of the town and would have been there last week for our annual trip! If you have time - visit fowey which is very pretty and also the Eden project if you haven't been before!

[Cassie86]

Morning Ladies,

I have been reading the thread on and off so I am fairly up to date with all the trials an tribulations, none of this is easy, is it ladies, but it will improve. I have continued to be busy at work with staff on leave and no replacements for them, I should not moan though at least I have been able to do be of assistance and feel worthwhile. The weather is terrible here in central London wet and windy and due to be a lot worse.

I have booked some leave for next week only a couple of days, but it will be a break my youngest daughter has booked a couple of nights in St Austell Cornwall, which will make a nice break away, we are going Sunday morning and return Tuesday night, Saturday was not available.

I had best get a wriggle on and get ready for work. Have a good day all x Cassie

[Lovewine]

Morning everyone, it's blowing a gale here this morning so as I don't want my wig blowing off into the next county I shall just wear a hat! And walk my dogs. Am fed up with wig now, it doesn't seem very secure now my own hair is growing, think I might use the superdrug special effects dye and see how it looks!
Rads at 10.30, Joan and Rosie, hope things run smoothly, Rosie I will be thinking of you on your long bus ride! I talk to a lady having rads at same time as me and she lives quite a way out at Melton Mowbray and uses patient bus that takes about 2 hours too as picks up from surrounding villages- she's finding it hard too.
I have to juggle my work in the afternoon this week too, find it harder as am more tired in the afternoons.

Have downloaded to kindle Lynda bellinghams book and started it at 6.00 a.m this morning with my favourite tassimo coffee back in bed!! I found it hard to put down, not self pitying , obviously poignant now, but I am looking forward to reading more later on!!
Have a good day everyone- Jackie hope your planning goes on time and have a fabulous holiday!
Kirstie, once again lovely to have you back!
Tij, Cassie? Wild purl, tulamo have good days!

[Kirstie77]

Hi lovewine it's nice to be back, thank you all for the warm welcome ;0) sounds like your having a tough time at the moment x

I can't remember a time when sleeping wasn't an issue - I took so much for granted ;0)

Rosie I have to drive as of tomorrow as I have to be in work they allowed me to work from home last week which was good of them but I was over ambitious I should have really been off work but hey ho need the cash, I know what ou mean about redundancy and don't worry I fully intend to fight my corner if I need too ;0) lets hope it doesn't come to that!

[Lovewine]

I know Rosie, I can never understand why people carry on smoking whilst having chemo! When I went today there were people puffing away outside entrance to cancer centre, even though there is a notice saying no smoking!
Don't be too concerned about herceptin, compared to chemo it really is nothing, I found the injection was uncomfortable , but you are having the infusion aren't you? Will that be a cannula in hand? I have to stay in the chemo unit again on Thursday after my herceptin just to make sure there is no reaction to it- apparently it is very rare, but it is a condition made by drug manufacturers-(Roche), I was told that each dose of herceptin we have every 3 weeks costs £4,000 !!

[rosie14]

Lovewine sorry to hear that you are having trouble sleeping again it could be related to your recent stress with your son and his ex in addition to your health issues! I have to have my first Herceptin infusion on Wednesday after rads and I am not looking forward to that!
I was surprised to see how many cancer patients were outside smoking at the oncology centre today. Some even had cannulas in their hand so were obviously about to have chemo!

[Lovewine]

Jackie, my surgeon at glenfield hospital is fantastic and so approachable and warm, she also works 2 days a week at the private spire hospital, I know we are not allowed to name the surgeons but she is married with a daughter and plays badminton! You can look on the glenfield/spire hospital website!!

[Lovewine]

Hi Kirsty, so lovely you are back!! I have also thought about you a lot and wondered how you were getting on, sorry you have had a rough time, hope things are on the up now despite the inflations.
Jackie, how exciting to be going away for a holiday, have a lovely time and good luck with the packing! Hope your radiotherapy planning goes ok without too much discomfort to your arm, must say regarding packing I am like Joan, Taking most of my wardrobe and still having nothing suitable to wear!!
Rosie, what a long day you have, hopefully you don't get travel sick!! You will be really fed up with the journey by the end of the week, at least you have your daughters visit to look forward to and have a respite from the bus!
Tij, how nice to see your son again, it will put your mind at rest to know everything is ok with him, you sound like you are doing well the bike riding! The veggie chilli is Jamie Oliver's recipe and delicious, even for non vegetarians.
Joan, hope your rads went smoothly today? I had my review afterwards to check no problems with peeling skin etc, I haven't yet, but have started to feel tired now, not sleeping that great and keep having anxiety attacks, not helped by the cancer programmes and the sad loss of Linda Bellingham, I am still taking a low dose of anti anxiety pill to keep it under control. I have my 2nd herceptin jab on Thursday just after rads, not sure if I am having side effects , have very flaky nails and joint pain, but hopefully nothing more will develop!
Lisa, hope you are having a lovely holiday!
Cassie, hope you are ok.
Wildpurl, what have you got planned for your week off next week?

[rosie14]

Good evening Joan it's not an easy decision about dad but he can't breath very well and if he became very distressed which my sister things he would I could never live with myself if he got upset and couldn't breath. His breathing was very bad in August when we saw him and he could only take a few steps and then had to sit down to recover. I am hoping he will,hang on until Christmas as we will be in the UK.
Hope you didn't have to,wait too long for your radiotherapy.

[joan47]

Kirstie, so pleased you felt able to come back but I'm sorry you have clearly had a rough time although it sounds as if it has worked out in the end. Am I reading you right? Good that you don't have to have radiotherapy although it seems to be an easier ride (unless you have a terrible journey like Rosie, sorry Rosie) than chemo or surgery. Tough though that you are again having to cope with the possibility of redundancy.

Jackie, hope you manage to get your packing done and have a wonderful holiday. I hate packing at the best of times. I start off trying things on and trying to work out what will go with what and then give up and more or less shove everything in. Most of it then comes back unworn but while I'm away I'm scratching my head wondering why I brought what I did since nothing seems to be suitable. Love your autocorrections, especially the grandpa renting. I am still painting such nails as I have but a very insipid flesh pink so it isn't so evident they only come halfway up the nail bed. Reprinting them today I discovered that the only nail still hanging on has turned green. Yuk. It's not infected but it looks horrible. Took several coats to cover it up.

Lovewine, great that your insurance company paid up on your iPad. I must confess I have thought about your mishap a lot because when I go out I often hide it under papers so it could quite easily get thrown out.

TiJ, glad you're feeling life is returning to normal. You must be really looking forward to having your son home on Thursday. I think I am going to have to look up this vegetable chilli recipe, it's clearly a great hit.

Rosie, what a difficult decision about telling your father. My initial reaction, as nearer to your father in agevthan anyone else on the board, was that if one of my children had cancer I would want to know, even if it worried and upset me. But now is probably not the right time and isn't really necessary, as Wildpurl said, you could just say you're not well at the moment and can't travel so that he doesn't feel you are choosing not to come over. And as you say, you probably have to go with what your sister is saying. I hope the news about his health improves. Hope rads went well and journey not too terrible.

Off now to rads 4. Much later appt today_-6.25-because of the strike action. Keeping my fingers crossed the machine isn't on strike as well.

[rosie14]

I have only just started to drive and I find turning restrictive due to the tightness. I only had 50mls each time too.
Hope you get on ok with the consultant it does make you feel you are more mobile driving. I would been surprised if they made you redundant as it could be seen to be discriminating in your circumstances.

[Kirstie77]

Hi Rosie it's nice to be back ;0)

Yes these expanders are not comfortable at all, I'm a week today and I have to say if I do anything of any real significance even a long walk they hurt a lot, one more than the other, I have been taking pain killers too. I'm not looking forward to them being pumped up I only have 50ml in each at the moment ! I still look flat chested with discs stuck under my skin !

I'm off to see the consultant this evening so he can check how I'm doing and see if I'm okay to drive, not that I want too drive around really but I can't work at home for long there is only so much I can do and I escaped the last lot of redundancy but they are doing it again ! I find out next week.

I really feel for all you ladies having to have radio I feel i am so lucky that I don't have to have that, hugs to you all x

[rosie14]

Good afternoon ladies!
Wildpurl,glad that you are feeling more energise game relaxing weekend works wonders! I was on my way to Nicosia which is twice as far as Limassol!!!
Lovewine it is indeed very sad about Lynda I thought she was looking so well. How many ladies remember the bisto advert? Just read the news online and it was OXO not bistro!!!! Hope you rads went ok today and Joan also.
Tlj I bet you are looking forward to your son coming home I am really looking forward to my daughter and family arriving on Saturday night. The radiographer reminded me that next Tuesday is bank holiday here so I get a day off whilst the family are here!!!!
Jackie glad to hear form you sorry to hear about your painful arm it is not a comfortable position to hold in for what seems ages! Have a super holiday you are staying the other did side of the island from where we live on the west. Hope you find a shady bar your side of the island!!!
Kirstie I am so glad you have come back to us I have often wondered how you were. We have all been on the grumpy step on this board several times and helped each other though the hard times.
Tissue expanders have been the bain of my life since my surgery in July! I have now had them inflated 350 mls each. It has only been the last 2 weeks when I haven't felt so sore I think at last my insides are healing! They constantly feel right and as if my chest is being clamped. I have got used to them but in the early weeks I would have done anything to have them taken out! My surgeon said air must be patient I didn't expect to be patient for so long! I have moaned so much on this board about them. I ended up,taking pain killers after an inflation they were at their very worst then! Stay with us on the journey! It's good to have you back.
I am going to get fed up with this journey every day. The worst thing is hanging around at the hospital waiting for the patients bus back to Paphos. I was in at 9 and drinking coffee at 9.30. The bus didn't leave until 11.45 today! There was one too may passengers on the way back and one sat on the floor on a cushion!!!! Only in Cyprus !!!!! Some passengers got off at Limassol so the poor lady on the floor got a seat! I was,so,hungry when I got,in the house I,couldn't get in the fridge fast enough! I took a puzzle book with me today. I do have an iPod I will,get my son in law to put some more music on it when he is here next week.

[Kirstie77]

Hi Jackie, thanks for being so understanding I felt really nervous writing that post x

It certainly throws some curve balls !

[Jackie09]

Hello Kirstie,

It's so very lovely to hear from you again - I have thought about you often! We were quite similar in our tendency for extra hospital visits! I can completely understand your reluctance to post here when not feeling up-beat - I have been the same over the past few weeks, after not having the best news following surgery. Rosie will join you on the grumpy step re expanders - she will be along soon so you can swap notes. Welcome back x x

[Kirstie77]

Well hello ladies,

I am tentatively putting my head up above the parapet .... I'm sorry I disappeared but I was having a bit of a tough time of it and you were all trying to be so positive so I didn't want to fill you in with what was going on and so disappeared , I didn't expect it to be so long but one thing after another happened and I was in hospital more than I was out, but all is well now and I had my expanders put in last week. (They are not as comfortable as I thought they would be).

I ventured back on here last week and have taken until now to catch up with you all - so here I am am sending humble apologies for my disappearing act and to let you know I'm still here ;0)

Xx

[Jackie09]

Hello everyone,

I hope you're all going to have good days today, with a treat planned in somewhere along the line! I'm just about to begin to sort out my packing for our trip tomorrow. My arm is still sore and stiff so the thought if trying on clothes to take isn't appealing. That sounds ungrateful, but I hadn't thought that some of my clothes now won't suit my thick strapped bras or maybe reveal the dent in my chest! I must also get some travel insurance today too, as I'm now not covered on our family policy. Insurewith was set up by a lady who has had BC as she was so fed up of being quoted fortunes, so hopefully I will get sorted with her company.
So tomorrow will be busy as I have my radiotherapy planning appointment. What with worrying abiut my arm not getting I to position and frantically exercising and the holiday, I haven't bad time to get over-anxious about my tattoos. I'm putting my cream down where was my former cleavage as this is still quite tender. It will then be off to the airport straight afterwards. We are staying in Ayia Thekla, which is near Ayia Napa. We haven't stayed there before, but know the area well. We were going to stay on Protarus, as we live it there, but this villa is right on the sea front - and I love to look at the sea - so Thekla it is. We've hired a car and don't mind at all driving - that way we get to spend time at many different beaches! The in-laws are also in Cyprus currently - staying in Phaphos - they ate retired and have been there for 6 weeks already!
Rosie - I hope the radio journeys become bearable and don't envy you one bit. I visited the department last week and it took me 3 hrs round trip - but at least the parking was free.
Lovewine - glad you got your I-pad sorted out. It sounds just the sort of thing I would do. Hope the radio is going well. I'm glad you were pleased with your surgeon (is her name something you'd expect to find growing outside?).
Joan - what rotten luck about uour finger nails. I have lost just the one - and that is bad enough. Are you still painting them? It sounds like you're grandpa tenting (auto correct - but sounds funny!) grandpa renting (even funnier!) grandparenting duties are keeping you busy.
Wildpurl - glad you only have 1full week left to go, but very sorry to hear of the uncertainty about your role.
Cassie - hope you are well and your sons are settled once again
Lisa - hope you are enjoying your holiday! I wish there was some way I could meet up for a drink too - in a shady bar of course!
Tulamo - how are you? Recovering well from your last chemo I hope now.
Love all of the photographs - will have to add my own soon!
Love to all x x

[Tlj63]

Morning ladies. Hope everyone's in good spirits despite the sad news about Lynda Bellingham. You have all inspired me to have a go at making the veggie chilli. I was just saying to my husband that I was bored of cooking the same old things. So I'm going to look the recipe up on line in a minute.
I hope everyone's weekend was enjoyable and relaxing. I am starting to feel as if life is getting back to normal, other than serious lack of hair, tamoxifen and herceptin. We invited some friends round for dinner on Saturday night and I went on a bike ride with my husband on Sunday. Really looking forward to my son coming home on Thursday. Can't wait to give him a big hug. He's still only communicating via text at the moment so it's hard to tell how he is feeling.
Rosie, when you see this you will probably have returned from your RT. I hope you are not too exhausted after your long journey. Have you got an iPod you could listen to on the bus?
Must get on with the domestic tasks now, washing up, trip to supermarket and general tidying.

[Lovewine]

Morning ladies, lovely morning here too, just done my " daily drag" with my dogs!! Felt quite upbeat until I just switched on the news and saw Lynda Bellingham had died , feel very sad as saw her on t.v the other day being quite cheerful and positive about Christmas.
On my way shortly for radiotherapy, Rosie, hope you get on ok and are not too tired, you too Wildpurl.
Have a good day everyone.

[Wildpurl]

Morning everyone, well I feel more energised than last Monday so think I have managed to rest over the weekend. Also this is my last full time week and next week I am off, so feeling I can get through it but going to pace myself nonetheless.
Lovely clear morning although I don't think it will last!
Rosie I guess you are at or on your way to Limassol at the moment, hope it's not too tiring a day and hope your day goes well Lovewine, Joan, cassie and Jackie and everyone else

[Lovewine]

Yes I have to agree!! Certainly nicest I have tasted too! Hope you have a not too bad working week and not too tired!

[Wildpurl]

Oh I'm so glad you both liked it Lovewine! I thought it was stunning for flavour and the nicest veggie chilli I had ever tasted.

[Lovewine]

Wildpurl, the veggie chilli was delicious and a big hit with O/H!!

[Wildpurl]

Oh yes, a meet up next summer when you are over would be great rosie!

[Lovewine]

Rosie, does sound your sister is right, I think in hindsight after what you have said it would not help at all- Wildpurl is right, your dad needs his strength and to feel so worried about you and not be able to do a anything is awful, I know how much my parents have worried and suffered over me this year, maybe you could get away for a weekend, yes last week I didn't have a session on Monday due to machine being serviced!!
I love the idea of us meeting up next year!! How nice to chat in person over coffee and cake or a nice glass of wine of course!

[rosie14]

Thank you Lovewine and Wildpurl for your views regarding my dad. I have again spoken with my sister and she says she thinks he would be absolutely devastated if we told him now. She is much closer to him as she lives near him and encouraged him to move close to her after our mother died.
I suppose if push came to shove I could go one weekend I know you had an extra day without rads last week Lovewine. Glad you managed to,change the iron generator and go,for a walk 4 miles,well,done! The chilli will warm you up!
Good idea to do a walking holiday along Hadrian's Wall Wildpurl I wouldn't go in the winter though it will be very bleak!
Glad you got some time to spend in the garden it must be rather sad to be getting rid of the summer bedding plants.
Yes it would be lovely to meet up maybe we could think about it for next summer over a weekend when people won't be working. We always come to the UK end of July beginning of August. Something to think,about.
Have a good evening everyone!

[Wildpurl]

Oh I hope you enjoy the veggie chilli Lovewine!

[Wildpurl]

If I'm honest rosie I don't think it will help your Dad at all to know how ill you have been, as he will only worry and be unable to do anything, and he probably needs his energy for his own battles right now. If you need to explain why you can't come to see him at the moment, you could say that you have been unwell and are currently having regular treatment for it, so can't leave Cyprus until that is finished, which is true, but doesn't go into details. If he asks you can always say "womens troubles" and most men will not ask any more. But that's just my opinion with no knowledge at all of your Dad and your relationship with him. I think you are the best judge of how you feel and how he will react to the news.
It's lovely that you met up with Lisa, makes me wish I could come out to Cyprus now! It would be great as you say if we could all meet up for a meal and a glass or two of wine one day but quite demanding logistically! I am also a member of a knitting and crafting forum with members all over the UK and we have had a few meet ups in person, and are planning a weekend away together next March, so it can be done, but it takes a lot of planning.

I am enjoying the Hadrian's Wall course and on Friday I found OH researching walking holidays along the wall on his laptop! We both so enjoyed our holiday in Wales that we would love to do a walking holiday along Hadrian's Wall. OH has relations in Bamburgh and Seahouses, so we have often stayed there and one year as I had never seen the Wall we went to visit Housesteads Fort, which I really enjoyed. It would be very interesting to walk the whole length of it one day.

Well, I have done a bit of gardening, taken out some of the summer bedding which is finished now and planted my birthday present clematis. There is more to be done, but as we have a week off coming up I felt I could leave the last few tasks until then. OH's Dad is a keen gardener so will be happy to give us a hand.

[Lovewine]

Oh Rosie, what a dilemma, have just asked my O/Hs opinion too, it is a very difficult decision, but i think we both agree with your D/H that maybe the time has come to tell him about your treatment and how poorly you have been, maybe he will start to wonder why you are not going over to visit him at the moment? I understand totally the desire to protect him when he is ill and frail, how worrying for you.
Glad your meet up with Lisa went well, what a small world we live in! Hope she has a lovely week away.
I managed to change my steam generator quickly and then have managed a nice walk of about 4 miles, it's a lovely day, but very windy.
Wildpurl, I have made Jamie Oliver's veggie chilli for tonight's meal, hope it tastes ok, I know you really enjoy it, so fingers crossed!
Joan, sounds like a busy weekend for you, Stratford sounded very nice, hope all goes well for rads next week for you, must say it has made me feel quite tired too.