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February 2019 chemo starters

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Re: February starters 2019 - yes, we rule!

number 5 done and dusted whoop whoop.  Just have to keep those nasty reactions away now.  My neutrophils were 6.8 today.  Got more steroids and wbc injections to do this time.  Only one more!  Edinbird I dont think its right for you to be trying to think about your future job prospects while you are dealing with this barrying stuff.  You wont be able to think straight with all thats going on.  Im starving, only had toast and marmite this morning and just go back.  I am having pizza too.  My treat for having chemo.  Hope everyone is ok.  Love to all of you xxxx

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Re: February starters 2019 - yes, we rule!

Thanks for the thoughts guys xx

 

There is a Macmillan centre here but the one time I contacted them they took ages to come back and it seems like it’s one very harassed woman trying to do too much on her own... might have just caught at a bad time maybe but it wasn’t much help, I wanted to ask about my rights when I initially wasn’t getting much support for continuing to work.

 

I think Maggie’s are a better option here but I’m not sure what they offer from a work perspective. I know they do general counselling. I tried online and phone counselling before but I just end up using it as a sounding board and wanting decisions made for me, I never come to any conclusions. I might see if there is anything more work related. Until I know if chemo has worked and what the options are I don’t have anything to discuss, just stuck in limbo at the moment.

 

Had a shower anyway you’ll be pleased to know! Wish the sweats would just go away! This evening need to go over my job forms then I can send them tomorrow and then we have to watch Game of Thrones... get to have pizza with that!

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Re: February starters 2019 - yes, we rule!

Sandraindurham,

surely you must qualify for Universal Credit 

https://www.gov.uk/universal-credit/eligibility

do have a look and place your application.

It is all done online,

Rosina

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Re: February starters 2019 - yes, we rule!

Oh Rosina so sorry to hear your blooming neutrophils have set you back yet another week!!  they really aren't behaving themselves!!! :catsad: Here's hoping that the injections do the trick.  Not nice that you had to inject yourself in the hospital loo!  you'd have thought a nice nurse might have volunteered to help.....

 

As for life coaching..... that is usually more of a professional / career / achieve your success goals kind of thing (so - yes - you're right - might be good for Edinbird) - but maybe in the context of the hospital they are coming at it from a different kind of tack?

 

My post to Sandra seems to have reappeared now - a few posts down - which is good as it saves me retyping it.  In summary I'm not convinced crowdfunding is the best route in this case, explanations below....

 

Susie I'm sorry to hear you are in a down spell - hope it passes soon and you can continue to enjoy the feeling-physically-better bit x

 

 

 

 

 

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Re: February starters 2019 - yes, we rule!

Hi Ladies 

back from the Hospital. Another week’s delay as blood test results indicated neutrophil count up to 1.0 from 0.9 last week. 

I have been sent home with 3 WBC injections ( had to do one today myself in the ladies at the hospital after seeing the oncologist) then 2 more .

Back for a blood test next week Tuesday .

 I have no control over this  🙃obviously this horse tranquiliser of a drug must be quite a zapper!

Sandraindurham, you need the GoFundMe website.

Mum and I are ok now, thanks for everyone’s input - she is more subdued today. Some kind lady bought her a bottle of water in Boots (she is very touched by the gesture) said she had been feeling dizzy in there . She had been reading till midnight last night !! She doesn’t have to. I told her the hospital was very busy and she agreed that it was much better for her to stay put as she cannot cope with noise and crowds.

Implausible glad you are feeling better.

Edinbird does your Macmillan Cancer Center offer ‘Life Coaching ‘ ? 

As I am back up there at my centre next Tuesday I asked them what is on offer on a Tuesday. The massage and reflexology which was on offer was all booked up , Yoga clashes with my oncologist appointment so the only thing available was Life Coaching ( 1 slot left) as I haven’t got a clue about what it is , I took the slot. It’s a 30 minute drive to get to the hospital and it seems more worthwhile when I do something more than a blood test and a 5 minute chat with the oncologist.

Hugs to all,

Rosina

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Re: February starters 2019 - yes, we rule!


@Nettienoo wrote:

Implausible, I’m glad it’s not just me that upsets them! 😁 x


indeed!

 

I noticed that your rogue post did eventually resurface so hopefully mine will too, otherwise I'll have to type it all again...

 

PS your Madonna comment made me laugh out loud!

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Re: February starters 2019 - yes, we rule!

Implausible, I’m glad it’s not just me that upsets them! 😁 x

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Re: February starters 2019 - yes, we rule!

SusieB, {{{{{{hugs}}}}} my darling. Xxx

 

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Re: February starters 2019 - yes, we rule!

Well that's annoying.  I wrote a reply to Sandra with advice but it has been marked as spam and removed.

 

Hopefully it will pop up later once a moderator has checked it and realised it is ok....

 

 

Nettie.... really glad you are moving out of the grotty phase of your cycle.  I think I am too.  Definitely feel a lot better than yesterday and I've even got some housework done.  How exciting! :cathappy:  who would have thought that the highlight of my day would be hoovering :cathappy:

 

Marlyn I really hope that the rads are going better this time!

 

And Daisy that #5 is going well...

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Re: February starters 2019 - yes, we rule!

Hi everyone

Trying to keep up with all that chat but there's loads. Haven't  been feeling my usual self  since yesterday so have, in the main just read the posts and given out lots of ❤❤❤. I thought having a break from chemo would be brilliant but at the moment I'm being reminded of what it feels like to be normal -  no fatigue, no injections, food and drink taste fine, no cold capping, etc, etc but realising that things are nowhere near normal. I've still got Barrying bc, still got surgery to come, more chemo CT ☹, rads and goodness knows what else. Guess I'm just having one of those 'moments' and hope it passes soon🤞. Funnily enough someone mentioned about support or lack of of it the other day regarding looking after our mental health. Our hospital has a system whereby the bc nurses pass on your details to a team within the hospital at certain times, ie just prior to chemo starting, or in my case, between end of chemo and prior to surgery. Someone will phone at a pre arranged time and we are given the opportunity to chat, ask questions,etc. I had one such call on Friday and as I felt ok it was more or less a case of being reminded that help is there if we need it. Yeovil hospital will provide this support for as long as we need it, when we need it. Even in 10, 20 30, years time. If I'd had that call today it would have been helpful. I know I can contact them today if I wish but I'll see how I go. Also I've got PICC care Weds so will have the opportunity to talk to a bc nurse then if I want. On the bright side our son is away over the bank holiday weekend so me and hubby will have a but more 'us time' prior to my next phases of treatment😊. 

Anyway enough of me feeling sorry for myself😢😩☹.

Glad I'm not the only one to have boring one way conversations, if that's what you can call them, with mother. Even if we point out we don't know who's she talking about, or she's already related the story before we have to show diligent interest. My hubby often says she's on send not receive. I know she's 87 now but she's always been like it. She even does it when she sends emails aaaaaarrrrrggggghhhhh!!!!!!.

Sorry you're having to make such difficult decisions Edinbird. I had a similar experience when we were faced with redundancy during 2011/12. It was terrible then and I was fit and healthy at the time, but still ended up on meds for anxiety. Luckily, for me taking redundancy worked out ok for me as I was able to take my civil service pension and sadly my Mother in law passed away soon after, and Paul got his inheritance so we were able to pay off our mortgage. You're still young so this may prove to be the time when you reassess your career opportunities and ensure you get the life/work balance we all crave.

Stargazer1 as I mentioned yesterday it was good to hear from you. It's such a shame you've had a rough time of it. That's the problem with this chemo lark we never know what's going to hit us next. I'm one of a small group on here that's having chemo prior to surgery. I've just had 4 rounds of FEC (I'm on a trial), and faired pretty well on it. Due to have 4 rounds of TC which I'm not looking forward to, after surgery. Hope you continue to get better and keep in touch. We do wonder and worry about people who have dropped out of the forum. Take care xx

Must love you and leave you. Will be back later for a catch up with everyone either tonight or tomorrow as at the moment I can't remember who said what. Oh! Thanks for the photos Ocean21 they did help cheer me up a little yesterday☺. All the Best xxxxxxx   

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Re: February starters 2019 - yes, we rule!

Oh Sandra :catsad:

 

I'm so sorry that things have got to breaking point

 

The problem with online based crowd funding is that by definition you need to rally the attentions of an online crowd who have a personal connection with you.  And if you aren't an active member of any busy online communities then that is going to be tricky

 

I'd definitely follow Jencat's advice and contact Macmillan as a first resort.

 

And then I'd think about what other - offline - communities you have been a big contributor to.... the obvious one being the church.   I know that things didn't end well in terms of your relationship with the *leadership* of the church but you must still have friends in the congregation?  Is there the possibility of a collection/ fundraising effort there?

 

The other option is the university.  Again bypass the people in charge who have been less than helpful and appeal to the student body directly via your friends there?  Students love a fundraiser!

 

I don't think that a GoFundMe is necessarily your best course of action.....

 

But call MacMillan today!  I am sure they will have some options x

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Re: February starters 2019 - yes, we rule!

Hi gorgeous ones! 2nd attempt at posting. Did a really long one early, just about to post, door bell rang, got distracted, lost post...grrr.

I’m currently out of my grotty couple of days. In the 7-14 days dodgy bit now. Determined to stay infection free, as don’t want anymore delays. I think I may be the last one to finish chemo? I didn’t start until 27th Feb and, with no more delays, I could have my last on 24th June. I’m not silly enough to get my hopes up though. 

Marlyn, how is rads going/gone? Hard to lie there feeling so exposed and vulnerable but you will cope with your usual humour I know. Quick question for you actually, I know you had 4 FEC with a reduction in amount. Did your hair start growing back before that? I’ve got a def fluff sprouting and am now worrying FEC is doing nothing but it did give me low wbc last time so may be it is? 

Stargazer. So glad for update. Sorry you have been suffering. We are always here when you need us and nearly there with your chemo. 🙌🏻. 

Sonia, that barrying oral thrush. Do you only get treatment when it has already started or is there some med you could you start having early to ward it off next time? Horrendous thing to have to keep coping with. Does it clear up in between cycles? 

Edinbird, wise words from ImplausibleSarah earlier. You can only try and keep all options open for now, take each day at a time as how you are feeling about life/jobs/wellbeing etc will change. It’s hard to think of a time when we may have the motivation and energy to do more at the moment though. I think you have managed fantastically well keeping up with work matters and your life so far.

Implausible, omg! How you stayed calm with a temp that high I don’t know. I’d have been on my way to get assessed. I think that’s a lesson for us all. If it’s just a high temp and we feel ok we probably will be if we can just take action to cool down and not panic. 

Rosina, your mother! Bless her! 🙄. Been there myself. You’re are a flipping saint for not losing it completely under the circumstances. You will laugh when you look back. 

Ocean, beautiful images.....that walk through the trees on your photos. I want to be there. It looks so magical and peaceful.

Daisydi, I think a lot of our worries are similar. On the plus side, even with all the rubbish going on in our lives we still have so much more going for us than Madonna. That woman has no dignity left. 🙈 

S & V, I’ve participated in crowdfunding only by donating. Does V have any friends that could help set something up? I think there is a website called Go fund me? Probably others. I expect you go on the website and follow instructions but you probably need Facebook to spread the word about the fund. If you can find some way or someone to do it for you at the very least, it would draw attention to your predicament. If you got something on to Facebook somehow, I could definitely help with the sharing. I’m just not savvy enough to help set the process up. 

MBJ, Madness, I saw them getting off a train from London at Stafford station about 3/4 years ago on their way to V Festival. They hadn’t changed. I recognised Suggs straightaway. Will you have to wear baggy trousers to perform? 😂

Seaside, I couldn’t see a post over weekend from you sweetie but maybe I just missed it. Hope all ok. 

Deano, I think there was an update from you about how rough things have been. Special hugs coming your way. X

Love to you all. 

Thanks for being there. Xxxx

 

 

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Re: February starters 2019 - yes, we rule!

Hi Sandra,

I'm so sorry to read about your situation. I'm from the Oct '17 thread. I'm sorry, but I don't know how you go about crowdfunding or Justgiving, but I'm sure that someone will be along soon who does. Just wondered if you'd thought about contacting Macmillan, they might be able to help you? They have financial advisors and I had a Social Worker, who was very knowledgeable about grants/charity help that I might be entitled to x

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Re: February starters 2019 - yes, we rule!

In need of help, please?

 

Hi all, taking stock of my situation yesterday I realised that since this ordeal started, loss of job which was my life saving, I ended up with no money to help V or to face our daily expenses, so I had to dig into the money to pay for my university fees.

Short story, I have used the £2,500 for this and if I do not manage to get it and pay those 'lovely people' that turned down my request for help, they will send bailiffs and make a lot of trouble, and I cannot let V knows about all this.

I saw that people sometimes use crowdfunding for these situations, but I have no idea how to do it, especially because my social media life is tiny (I don't even have Facebook) and my Linked In and Twitter account just has a few contacts.

Does any of you have any experience in crowdfunding? or how to start this?

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Re: February starters 2019 - yes, we rule!

Waiting for my oncologist appointment at the Macmillan Cancer Support Center. I have found a lovely book to look at. It is full of photos and personal statements. I took a snap of one that I liked 2AEBF859-F15E-4E98-86C4-028E9C318AE6.jpeg

 

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Re: February starters 2019 - yes, we rule!

Rosina.....don't forget the quiet corner.....xxx

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Re: February starters 2019 - yes, we rule!

I used to go into total panic mode over my thermometer, was completely obsessed with it...so glad you were ok though....you don't want history repeating itself...

im obsessed with my blood pressure monitor right now, I see the nurse tomorrow ref high blood pressure and have been making notes of it to take tomorrow.....I'm driving myself nuts over it! 

 

Well....got rads this afternoon....wish me luck! Just hope me elbow ( or any other parts of my anatomy) aren't sticking out??!! Straight after I have my LGFG course....they had a cancellation so I almost snapped her arm off....xxxxx

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Re: February starters 2019 - yes, we rule!

Thanks Marlyn,

count to 10 . I will do my very best.

My daughter has said that I just have to listen without getting wound up.

Breath and count to 10.

Breath and count to 10.

🌸🌸🌸

 

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Re: February starters 2019 - yes, we rule!

Morning all

 

Stargazer!!!  It is good to hear from you!!!  We do worry loads about the people who have disappeared from the forum for whatever reason, but I guess this kind of online group suits some people more than others, so I was hoping you were ok just not on here... 


Sorry to hear you have had such a tough time with chemo :catsad:  It really is quite the ordeal, isn't it!   But did you say you are now on the final stretch?  Thank goodness.  I hope the last cycle is more gentle on you.  Please do pop back in once in a while to let us know how you are.

 

Most of us in here are on cycle 5 now, with 6th and final cycle in June.  Although there are a few of us who have already finished up.  And others who have a different timetable and will be continuing a little longer. 

Daisy, your point about your sister is interesting.  Mine is acting weird too.  To be fair she has always been weird :cathappy:  we have never been close.... she is much older than me and left home when I was 4, and there were times when I've not heard from her for literally years on end. 

But now she is insisting on calling every other day or so, because I think she feels obligated to show she cares because of the cancers and stuff.... but she is odd on the phone.... almost like she gets annoyed with me when she asks how I feel and I say that I feel not so good.   I keep trying to explain that it is normal for me to feel cack at this stage of the cycle and that it is just normal side effects of the chemo and that it isn't the end of the world.  But she acts like somehow I shouldn't be "suffering" at all and it feels like she thinks I'm just not trying hard enough to feel better :cathappy:  I think I just need to lie to her and tell her all is ticketyboo!

Families, huh??? :cathappy:

 

Anyway, all that aside, good luck for today!!!!

 

Sonia.... I have always loved that Dr Seuss quote :cathappy:  hope you start to feel better soon x

 

Oh Edinbird :catsad: :catsad:  reading your post I can really feel how overwhelming the job thing is.  It couldn't be worse timing for them to be restructuring jobs while you have so much else to deal with!   You do have youth on your side and I am sure you will bounce back after treatment quicker than us old dears, in terms of ongoing fatigue.  But you can't know exactly how you are going to be until you get there, and it sk difficult for you to have to make a decision on your future when you don't know what you will want or be able to manage. 

I think what I would do in the circumstances is apply for the job I would want if I was at full strength, and then ask them to manage it accordingly in terms of reasonable reduced hours etc while you build back up to full energy following the end of treatment.... rather than aiming low for a job you don't really want.

But obviously it is your call, and you understand your employer and your situation far more than I do.

 

Rosina.....  that sounds just like afternoons spent with my other half's gran!  She tells us repeatedly (literally, same stories over and over and over and overrrrrr) about all sorts of incredibly dull things happening to people we have never heard of.  And if we try to tell her about anything we've been up to she really isn't interested and cuts us short and starts on her anecdotes again.   You just have to grin and bear it!  :cathappy:

 

And talking of dull anecdotes.....

 

As for me.....well.... I had quite the evening last night!!!

 

I was super tired most of the day yesterday, dozing off and on on the sofa, so by early evening I had taken myself up to bed. 

Ironically when I got to bed I woke right up again so sat there reading....then I started to feel really warm, took my temp and it was 38.2    oh dear, here we go again!

 

But then I noticed that the radiator in my room was on full heat, which it shouldn't have been according to the thermostat setting.  Went through the whole house, every radiator was on crazy hot.  The kids were melting.  House was like a sauna.  No wonder I was warm!

We turned the thermostat right down but the radiators wouldn't turn off!  Kept getting even hotter!   Ended up having to turn them off at the boiler.  Turns out that the batteries in the thermostat remote control are nearly dead and so it had gone loopy....  by the point we finally managed to get the house to stop its crazy overheating I was up to 38.6!!  I was in a real panic, I couldn't work out how to stop the radiators getting hotter and hotter and thought the boiler was going to blow!!!!  Thank goodness for YouTube videos, I found one that showed me how to switch it off....

 

I felt fine though, didn't have an actual hot forehead, felt ok in myself.  So I really didn't want to over react and head straight back to the hospital when I was fairly sure my high temp was just down to the insanely hot house and the panic of trying to stop the boiler exploding.

 

So.....  I decided to get out of the sauna and went and sat in the car on the drive and watched telly on my iPad:D    by this point it was about 10.30 at night and my neighbour gave me the strangest look out of his window :catvery-happy:

20190519_215421-picsay.jpg

 

That worked to a point, I soon cooled down to about 37.8, but that is still too high.
Then I came back in the house that was still residually too hot and it started to creep up again.

So I basically sat there till nearly 3am repeatedly taking my temp and getting myself in a total state,  which in itself was making the numbers go up and down, getting ready to call a cab for a middle of the  night dash to to hospital....

 

Then, like a twit, I fell asleep, thermometer in hand!  :cathappy:

 

And.... by some miracle woke up this morning still alive and with a nice healthy temp of 37.0

Phew!

 

I probably should have gone to A and E last night when I couldn't get it under control.  But I'm kinda glad I didn't given that everything turned out ok in the end. 

All this is so blinking stressful!

 

Here's to all of us getting through today as best we can xxx

 

Iove to all

 

Sarah

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Re: February starters 2019 - yes, we rule!

Edinbird,

that just sounds bloody horrible.....I think not get a good nights kip puts the icing on the cake. I thank my lucky stars I didn't have to move onto T .......it comes to something when you start being grateful for the cancer you have! I hope you turn a corner soon Hun....I really do....and for all you other beautiful ladies who are suffering.....xxxxxxx

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Re: February starters 2019 - yes, we rule!

Oh Rosina....your post had me on stitches ( in a loving way) this was how my mum was....i used to count to 10 in a quiet corner....you took me back in time...lol.....

good luck in the hotel....breath.....xxxxxx

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Re: February starters 2019 - yes, we rule!

Hi Daisydi 

thanks for your post. New day , new start, this is what I wrote to my brother yesterday as I was so irritated with my mum :

‘Hi Bas, have just got back from a pub lunch with Granny and the kids. Place I took you. Granny wanted fish and chips then because it was Sunday and they had roast she changed her mind and had roast beef instead. Fair enough. It wasn’t hot enough for her so she sent it back and they made it hotter, fair enough ( but the Yorkshire pudding was burnt at the edges now), then the beef wasn’t sliced thin enough and it was too much to eat and it was better at the carvery in Yorkshire when she last had it with her cousin R. Then , did I know about L’s friend’s son who used to be a coast guard in Corfu and had now got a good job in Belgium and his mother moved to Corfu to be with him ? I said Corfu is a nice island. Anyway to cut a long story short I ran out of patience with her . My kids were telling me to calm down, Granny was saying ‘best not to talk’ 🤪 I was saying no , let others talk about something as nobody knows or cares about these people you are going on about. Granny ‘s answer the kids don’t talk. When they do talk she can’t hear them ( she took her hearing aid out) 🤪 
I think it’s old age!!!
She wanted to come tomorrow to the hospital with me and I said ‘to do what?’ I don’t like going but I have to. Anyway she is going to Boots the chemist and I said get the hearing aid fine tuned . She said she is. Then the other one was ‘I am not allowed to watch Eurovision’ and I said I never said that, it was on last night at 9pm and I asked you if you wanted to watch it but you said you were tired. She couldn’t argue with this as this is exactly what she said. I dropped her off at the Beauty Salon yesterday to get her toenails done and she insisted on walking back.
Anyway we are all good now. I am having a nap. As I said , it’s old age so no point in getting irritated. She liked the Calm music though. We are having 1 night in a hotel in the Ashdown Forest on Tuesday.
Oh and when I attempted to talk about the summer holidays, her answer was ‘ I cannot think that far ahead , day at a time’ but nobody talks we just have to listen to her rubbish stories about idiots we have never met. 
😫 So verdict she always was like this, Papou probably listened for as long as he could take it and then found other things to do with his time and brain.
Deep breath.
I feel better now 💋’

Still feeling that I need to develop more patience.

Must be hard for you Daisydi, at least my Mum can have a conversation with me ( even if she can keep going while the rest of us have a glazed look).

Bit embarrassing when your own teenage daughter is telling you to chill!

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Re: February starters 2019 - yes, we rule!

Morning xx

 

Well I was feeling a lot better last night the leg aches had stopped and I just thought I was tired. Called back fit for work. Fast forward to now when I’m sat in bed feeling rough, had a rubbish nights sleep and woke at 4 with legs aching again, headache, nose all bunged up again, just feeling wrong. Thank goodness my temperature was ok! Took paracetamol but that didn’t do a great deal. Back/stomach hurt also so not sure if that’s period trying to happen or the injections doing it?

 

So now I’m meant to be working!! 😬 it’s ok I only need to do a few hours my first two days back. Can’t face it yet though. And I have to do my job forms so it needs done. I have to do a note of interest for a job two grades down that I might end up having to take with no pay protection if I’m not successful for one of the jobs I’m matched into (that I don’t even know if I can or want to do after all this) and a flexible working application to show how I would do the jobs I’m matched into which are both based in Glasgow and I’m here. I didn’t want to do all the travelling before and I certainly don’t want to do it now! I have to show some innovation and willing to do it, it’s so hard not knowing what I’ll be able to do when it comes to it. Not just when treatment is finished but I see people talking about being tired months or years down the line. I have to make an effort on these jobs because if I don’t then I’m withdrawing from the process and basically resigning! I’ve tried so hard to just carry on with things and keep my life going but the thought of full time work after so long scares me to be honest, and then having to travel hours at least half the week, I think I’d be so tired and fed up and worn down. My job has been my life and now I just can’t face it. I’ll have to try and I’m sure it’ll be ok but it doesn’t help that I will never have my job to go back to as it’s gone 😔

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Re: February starters 2019 - yes, we rule!

Glad to hear from you star gazer, 

 

Hope everyone is good today, I’m still feeling run over by a bus, at the moment, but hopefully not long now till it passes. Oral thrush is getting me down. I’m just fed up with it. 

Saw this, this morning and thought it was very fitting xx 

 

 

64A0224E-183E-48A5-8BB7-50D5CE126861.jpeg

 

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Re: February starters 2019 - yes, we rule!

Hi Stargazer1 

So glad to hear from you☺. Will write more tomorrow. Have often wondered how you are getting on. P.lease keep in touch. SusieB/Lesley xxxxx   

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Re: February starters 2019 - yes, we rule!

Hi ladies,

I havent been on here for a very long while. but I have been thinking about all of you.

Ive been suffering from anxiety due to having extravation during one of my treatments and a hospital stay, I was prescribed lorazapam, which i refuse to take!  However I know its the last week of treatment for some of us so I just wanted to wish everyone the very best. I for one cannot wait for this 6 month nightmare to be over.

Good luck fabulous ladies

Lisa xxxxx

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Re: February starters 2019 - yes, we rule!

You must watch Madonna attempt to sing.  You will be cringing and it is so funny in an awkward kind of way!  I couldnt stomach watching the whole thing but I just happened to put it on when she came on.  Why am I not bouncing about on steroids this time???  Dont even have a rosy face but do keep getting hot flushes.  The art therapy sounds really good.  I think my cancer centre does some kind of art course but I never go in there!  Have the LGFG booked for 30th May and if I am well enough by then will check mine out too.  I think my sister is struggling to know what to say to me.  She tries to be upbeat but she was horrified how I was last time and doesnt know how I can put myself through it again.  My mum doesnt know what day it is and I think she seems to have gone blind as she cant see me or anything come to that. When I talk to her she looks up at the ceiling.  They are putting it down to the dementia.  I am not convinced but I havent got the energy to argue with them at the moment.  Hope everyone is ok x  By the way my onco nurse advised me not to take steroids after about 2pm so they dont interfere with sleep!  We'll see

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Re: February starters 2019 - yes, we rule!

Hi Daisydi,

we gave up.

We saw Madonna give her little speech, Mum cracked up over the eye patch and one of her crew saying that his mum grew up listening to her songs . We were in fits of laughter.

😂😂😂

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Re: February starters 2019 - yes, we rule!


Ahhh Ocean, we can always rely on you to pop up with some gorgeous pictures just when we need a bit of colour and natural beauty.....  absolutely stunning!
 
I know what you mean about lack of dignity.. sometimes, if the medical professionals in attendance seem trustworthy (like my nice chemo nurses) I am perfectly happy to throw caution, and clothing, to the winds :cathappy:   But if you get a funny feeling from someone, and they don't seem to be particularly considerate in regard to making sure you are well covered up, it suddenly feels extremely awkward and uncomfortable!  The last thing you want is to be creeped on when you are already in a vulnerable and upsetting situation. 
 
I remember them asking when I was in labour with my 3rd son if I was ok with a couple of student midwives coming in to observe.  I thought they would be female, and only 2 or 3 students.  I looked up to see about 15 young people, a mix of male and female, staring intently between my legs!!  It was somewhat offputting!!!
 
 
As for physchologists etc, it seems to really vary who gets offered what.  
 
Rosina has her lovely art therapy - which I am so jealous of :cathappy: - and a few other people have been offered counselling either now or after treatment.  Nothing remotely like that has been mentioned to me at any stage throughout the whole process, all the medical discussions have been strictly about physical not mental health.....

Maybe because I haven't expressed any concerns?

 

I did notice when I went to the Maggie's centre in Cheltenham for my LGFB session, that they do offer a 6 week course on "what now after treatment?" which I think I will try to get myself booked onto.  It will mean having to skive off work 2 hours early every Tuesday for a month and a half, which my boss might not be best pleased with, but I'm going to say/imply it is on doc's orders.....

 

As for out other halves / families etc.  My fella is keeping a brave face, he is being very matter of fact about everything, supporting me through treatment, taking the mickey out of me occasionally to make me laugh and cheer me up, but generally choosing not to make it into too big a deal.  I am grateful for his approach but do worry that he is more worried deep down than he is letting on.....  I can't see him being interested in counselling or chatting about it online though.  Not his style.

 

As for my 16yo son.... it is definitely playing on his  mind but he was deflecting his worry onto our cat!  He kept asking me every day if I thought the cat was ill, if she was sleeping too much, if I thought she smelled odd, what would happen if she died, whether we should start keeping her indoors as he was worried about her getting run over.  He was getting so obsessive about it that I twigged what was going on.  He didn't want to let himself worry about anything bad happening to me so he subconsciously made it about the cat instead.  Brains are clever!


He is now seeing a child/teen psychologist once a fortnight (at great expense!!) and it seems to be doing him the world of good.  He tells me he loves therapy :cathappy: 


The older kids?  They just don't mention it at all....  I've asked a couple of times if they are worried and they just brush it off.....

I think there is a Macmillan leaflet for loved ones, which might be of some use?

 

And talking about people worrying about other people - Sandra please thank V but honestly she mustn't be worrying about me!  I'm absolutely fine.  I mean nobody enjoys feeling poorly but I know *why* I feel naff, and I know I only have to put up with it for a couple more days.  Genuinely I am so utterly delighted that I didn't end up back in  that horrid hospital this morning, that I am a happy bunny!!!  

I have just spent a couple of days mainly asleep and feeling under the weather, but in the grand scheme of things that isn't that big a deal...

 

Sarah x

 

PS I skipped Eurovision this year.  Doesn't sound like I missed much:)  and I don't think it would be anywhere near as much fun sober!

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Re: February starters 2019 - yes, we rule!

Yes thanks Ocean it certainly is beautiful where you live.  Rosina wait until you get to Madonna.  It was truly awful!

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Re: February starters 2019 - yes, we rule!


@Rosina wrote:

Rosina, Veronica really wants to speak with you about all things Classic, her major problem is the attacks with aura that she has and blurred vision that prevents her to jump on the bandwagon and start a 'proper conversation' as she says!

But she is really looking forward to it!

 

Implausible, Veronica says that she wish she was there to give you some comfort, and to all other 'sisters' that are being through this misery.

And, Edinbird, she says that she is still keen on moving to Edinburgh, and she will look forward to have coffee with you one day!

Ocean21, you have the garden that I always wanted. Did you plant it all yourself or some came with the house?

Keep moving, my dears, we are all closer to the door!

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Re: February starters 2019 - yes, we rule!

Thanks for the pics Ocean21, 

I am keeping mum company and watching the Eurovision Song Contest on bbc iplayer. So far it is cringeworthy awful 😬

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Re: February starters 2019 - yes, we rule!

A7BAE3B1-39B1-4B36-B56F-7BAFE7BFCDB6.jpegNigellaNigella604C4F65-5D0B-4EA1-8C66-2084FEAE16EA.jpeg216B1EEE-1AFE-4987-B225-3CDEA9DC3B05.jpegPurple elderflower. No idea what it’s posh name is, it’s a cutting that I took and nurtured on.Purple elderflower. No idea what it’s posh name is, it’s a cutting that I took and nurtured on.Water lily flowers coming throughWater lily flowers coming through20B71D54-3E64-4E25-9F1C-C070FE5BEBE4.jpegI trying to ‘rewild’ parts of the garden. Garden needs to get its natural equilibrium back. Previous owners didn’t feed the soil and the farmers roundabout love their sprays. No matter, we’ll win through.I trying to ‘rewild’ parts of the garden. Garden needs to get its natural equilibrium back. Previous owners didn’t feed the soil and the farmers roundabout love their sprays. No matter, we’ll win through.Buttercups. The dragonflies are loving being amongst them.Buttercups. The dragonflies are loving being amongst them.E2A69985-BC0D-4CBA-8CE8-9C8129140C09.jpeg97134452-7026-4830-8823-7711EE0568B6.jpeg

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Re: February starters 2019 - yes, we rule!

Hey lovely ones,

 

Read through and caught up... I think ! 

 

Taxotere seems like a proper  bundle of laughs .. not. I wasn’t looking forward to weekly Taxol that I have but although the weekly  regime has its drawbacks I’m grateful not to be experiencing the side effects that you guys are having with Taxotere.

 

The one thing that I hadn’t anticipated on a weekly regime is the psychological adjustment. It seems like there’s a very short window available when you can stop thinking about being a bc patient. With a three weekly regime you could get some downtime.Anyway, whatever our regime we’re slowly but surely making our way through this bc quagmire and we’re winning.

 

 

Ive had 3 sessions of Taxol and I’ve another 6 to go. Then I have a break for a month and then I start rads for 5 weeks. Don’t know what the treatment regime is for that here but I’m due to see a radiologist so no doubt all will be revealed. Not looking forward to the topless bit among strangers but as you say Sarah, how else would they deliver such targeted therapy effectively. 

 

They’re don’t seem to go a bundle on patient dignity here. When I went for my heart scan this man who did the initial intake told me to remove all clothing from my top half and didn’t offer me anything to cover up.Don't know why but I instinctively felt something wasn’t right with him so even though my other half was with me I tried as best as I could to make sure he didn’t see much. From the look on his face I knew I made the right decision.Then after a little wait the cardiologist walked in and I had to uncover. Felt very undignified.Thankfully, Mr Creep wasn’t in the room too.

 

I see that some of us are struggling with moods and very understandably periods of high anxiety.

Over here , there’s a psychologist attached to the oncology team if patients want to see him/ her is it worth asking your respective oncology teams if there’s a similar service available for patients? Even if there aren’t any individual sessions available there may be group sessions where you can get together with other bc patients and talk through issues.Do  Macmillan offer any kind of talking therapy sessions?

 

On the subject of moods, I know it’s been an emotional rollercoaster for us ,what’s it been like for your partners/ loved ones? Have they said anything or are they trying to put on a ‘brave ‘face too?My other half had a bit of an outburst on Friday which is making me pause for thought.  There’s a carers forum on here that he might benefit from but apart emailing and reading online news he doesn’t ‘do’ any IT/ social media stuff and also I guess he’d feel hampered if he thought I might read what he wrote.

Conundrums, conundrums. 

 

 

Audiobooks, love them. I tend to listen while I’m crafting or decorating. I’ve tried it while gardening but that didn’t work out too well especially when I have to shift things. ! I started a book group here. Mainly to meet like-minded readers. I’m not into chick-lit or romances so I knew the only way to have a group for the kind of literature that I’m into is to start my own. It’s been an experience! That said I’ve got a core group now who are on the same vibe as me so that’s great. Seriously , thinking about starting an online book group so if any fellow readers are interested let me know.

 

Some pics for you. By the way SusieB , you and your hubby are justly proud of your garden, what a lovely space.And your wisteria looks wondrous, I’m jealous. Ive got two I’ve grown from seed , they’ll probably be about 18” high in 2025🤣

 

Hope that everyone is having a reasonably restful day.

xxAlliumAllium754497B4-0215-4903-92AB-4CC3302640F8.jpegValerianValerianBorage & bees. Self seeded, I leave it as the bees love it.Borage & bees. Self seeded, I leave it as the bees love it.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Re: February starters 2019 - yes, we rule!

Morning everyone

 

Hope we are all feeling as well as can be expected

 

I woke up this morning, looked in the mirror and got a shock, I looked like a murder victim, dried blood all over my face and pillow from what looks like a rather spectacular night time nosebleed.  Thanks T! :cathappy:

 

I've decided that, what with the nosebleeds and my lovely skinhead hairdo, I'm basically Eleven from Stranger Things :cathappy:
img_7698.jpg

 

BUT that aside ....this time 3 weeks ago I was on my way to the hospital with a temp of 38.2, this morning it is 37.1 and I ain't going NOWHERE :cathappy: woohoo!

 

Still feel weak as a kitten/achey all over/ generally cack, but I'm happy as larry sat at home on my own sofa watching Line of Duty.  Fingers crossed I can remain out of the danger zone.

 

Rosina - thanks for all the detailed info about the art therapy stuff.  That is really helpful.  I'm still trying to work out how I can find a way to help with it on a part time/part qualified basis.....  if it is generally administered strictly 1:1 then that might be tricky.  I kind of want to find someone doing group art therapy so that I can just be a kind of classroom assistant....    I am definitely going to go to that one day workshop in September if I am well enough and I guess I can ask them there how best to proceed.    Also I would rather work with adults than traumatised kids..... I don't think I would feel comfortable having that much responsibility!  Either cancer patients or maybe domestic abuse survivors....   lots to think about....  I just want to "pay back" into society a little.  Funny how a brush with mortality changes your priorities!

 

Sonia my last chemo is due for the day before yours.  We are getting there!

 

Nettie sorry you are hitting that rotten stage of the cycle.  Hopefully it won't last too long.  I am almost nostalgic for FEC now that T is so much horrider!  But I think I got away with a lot on FEC, I know it is a lot worse for some of you than I had it.  

 

You sound like me with sports.....  I hate to see the other team getting a total thrashing even if it means that my team wins!  I remember my pal's hubby having a right go at me once as we were watching our team dish out a 12-0 victory against the Telford Tigers.  I said "I wish Telford would just score one goal", and he immediately declared me a "fake fan" who doesn't understand how hockey works.  :cathappy:

 

Lovemama,  sounds like you have really been through the wars :catsad:  but great news that side effects are now clearing up and you are on your way back to your old self.  I appreciate you giving us a bit of a timetable expectation, as I think we are all hoping to bounce right back to our old "normal" as soon as treatment ends, but of course that isn't realistic! 

 

I'm hoping to at least feel a bit more like me by the start of 2020, but I have accepted that 2019 is a bit of a write off!

 

Edinbird, looks like you did a bit of a "count your blessings" exercise this morning.  Always a good idea.  I also am grateful that, although the treatment has not been remotely fun, at least it is available to us for free, and it is working to make us better.  We will all come through this stronger.  Eventually!   

 

And as you say, in between the horrid bits, we have mostly managed to have some fun, days out, nice walks, even trips to France! 

 

And great news about your pal's benefits and counselling... it is difficult when you care about someone who the system appears to be letting down....  a relief for you there.  It isn't as if you don't have enough to worry about already of your own!

 

Oh and I can't sit down in my shower cubicle either:)  it is tiny! 

 

Daisydi enjoy the readybrek steroid glow :cathappy:

 

Sarah x

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Re: February starters 2019 - yes, we rule!

Morning all, jjust taken steroids so looking forward to a nice healthy glow.  Here we go again ....

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Re: February starters 2019 - yes, we rule!

Hi Edinbird, 

I sit in the bath. Shower is set to warm ( not hot) I stand at the far end of tub as the water always starts off cold and move in once water is warm and sit down.

I only get up once I have finished and switch shower off.

Hope this helps 🌼

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Re: February starters 2019 - yes, we rule!

Rosina the good shower is in the en-suite in a cubicle so I can just about sit down but it’s very awkward. Have a shower over the bath in the main bathroom, it’s not like that one is dreadful but it’s not as good. When I have a shower I have it on hot to wash my body - turn it down to wash my hair - turn it down again to condition my hair. I’d have to be up and down to keep adjusting it and it’s tricky when there’s not much space. I don’t think my joints would like it! I could try the bath one, it’s not like it’s too much faff to adjust until I have the right temperature. I could sit on the edge of the bath but that’s not too comfy.

 

I probably need to wash my hair it was Tuesday when I last did, I’ve been so sweaty it’s rather revolting! No one can see under my hat but when what pokes out is all stuck together and greasy too I feel a right mess in public!

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Re: February starters 2019 - yes, we rule!

Edinbird, Good Morning 

“Might reward myself with a shower (tho that involves standing up so will have to think about that...)”

just wondering : can’t you sit down in the shower? I have done so on many occasions ( both now and before bc ) just make sure the shower curtain is well placed and that the water can flow down the drain. I angle the shower handle so that the water hits my back between the shoulders. 

Hugs,

Rosina

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Re: February starters 2019 - yes, we rule!

Morning xx going to get in early whilst I’m not feeling too bad!

 

Crappy nights sleep more sweats and was just wide awake at one point so I got up and had tea and toast! This extra weight is no way coming off! 😂 legs still sore and slight headache actually but I don’t feel too bad in myself. Think I will try for the shopping later and that will be my effort to be normal today. Might reward myself with a shower (tho that involves standing up so will have to think about that...)

 

Feeling happy tho as

 

Weather looks nicer today 😊

Bestie found out his benefits are being increased not cut! We were so worried he was losing out. Not that I want him to be considered more sick but it’s a proper reflection of his situation so better all round

His counselling that we thought was being cut because he’s struggling (yeah that makes sense) isn’t so again more stuff I don’t have to worry about when Barry is being Barry

Won the lotto!! I got a free lucky dip 🙌🏻😂 haven’t won a thing for ages so that’s good!

 

A few of us seem to be having treatment early next week, it must be stressful waiting for it when several of us seem to be suffering from ours... I’m thinking I can’t wait for my last cycle but I don’t want to feel like this again! Wish I was back on FEC... but FEC wasn’t zapping the little bugger that well. If T has been killing all the good cells and not really getting the bad ones I will be most annoyed! Laying here having a good poke and prod and nipple fiddle... no point stressing as it’s not clear cut but less than 3 weeks to my scan won’t really give the third T much chance to work... they must know what they’re doing.

 

All the nurses were very positive in hospital and two said they wouldn’t even know about my hair (was wearing a headband) and one still said it looked ok when I took the band off!! Yeah I’ve ended up admitted twice but I keep saying how I’ve never felt or been sick. I’ve had a sore throat, constipation, diarrhoea, felt dizzy, a cold. Just normal things everyone gets. These aches aren’t normal and neither is the hair loss but that’s ok, I suppose I still feel like chemo hasn’t kicked me in the butt too much. And then I feel bad for everyone who has had to stop early, who has been delayed, who has been stuck in hospitals for days in a cupboard or not.

 

Flip side... Everyone who has managed to do loads of exercise and eat well, everyone who has gone on holiday!! We are all getting by and the bad bits we get through together and the good bits help us get through the bad bits. Flowers and art and music and food. And lots and lots of poop and blood and other Barry stuff.

 

We are all wonderful 💕

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Re: February starters 2019 - yes, we rule!

Today’s messageToday’s message

 

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Re: February starters 2019 - yes, we rule!

Hi DaisyD, Marlyn, Susie B, thanks so much for your virtual hug. It really helped me to calm.

Not a surprise to me, I got almost all the side effects in the list. The bisphosphonate Zometa had turned me to a  zombie for 1 whole week. Stiffed and heavy legs, headache, sore muscle in legs and arms, watery eyes. Took 3-4 Tylenol (Panadol in UK?) every day and finally yesterday, all symptoms suddenly disappeared.

11 weeks after my last dose of 3-weekly Paclitaxel. My finger tips still couldn't feel the hot and cold. Still blurred vision. (Remember when having EC in 2011, my onco told me my vision prescription should be able to reverse after chemo and it did.). This time, the chemo nurse told me to be patience, some people took a year to recover. My hair started to grow when cycle 5 (out of 8). 20 weeks now, about 1 inch.

3 weekly paclitaxel is as toxic as 3 weekly docetaxel or maybe more. But a recent research is showing docetaxel is more effective than pacltaxel. The research was printed at end of 2018 which was after my chemo started  8-(

https://news.cancerconnect.com/breast-cancer/taxotere-confirmed-more-effective-than-taxol-for-metast...

 

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Re: February starters 2019 - yes, we rule!

AB84FB55-C4CD-4A0B-98D2-F47E69A7DF33.jpeg

Hi my gorgeous ones. I’m managing to keep up with your posts but am in full steroid comedown/wbc build up this weekend and feel pretty poop. Barrying hate FEC but from what I’ve read would be hating T more. So sad you are suffering on it girlies. I’m sending you all a cuddle. Hopefully back with you in better form soon. On the plus side, I managed to drag myself downstairs to watch my team win the FA cup. Felt so sorry for Watford though as the goals kept going in. Xxx

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Re: February starters 2019 - yes, we rule!

Hello All,

catching up on all the posts.

1) Implausible your posts make me laugh. I have never thought of you as being sarcastic! I am now referring to T as ‘horse tranquiliser ‘ to family and friends. Re. the art therapy my sessions are 1-1 and I really get a lot out of it. My H1 thought that I was painting a ‘still life’ each time I went ( he would ask me what did you paint today ? ) another friend asked if she could come and watch and a colleague at school  made an off the cuff remark and said ‘does that mean you sob while you paint ?’ which shows how little is known out there about what art therapy is ( my colleague- senior to me I may add should have known better- I think she was trying to keep the conversation light and amusing!!!).

 I knew nothing about art therapy when I started but I have always liked to paint and draw ( I ended up doing an art A level in a year, during my 2nd year of teaching when I signed up for an art evening class and the tutor talked me into it 🤪 got a ‘C’ grade ).

My art therapist is a ‘transpersonal’ counsellor. We usually start with a chat about my week, or how I feel, or why I was late ( this happened last week 😬) anything really and I have the option to use watercolour , chalk or pastels. I lead the session and I feel totally in control. One 2 occasions I have been gently guided to notice something in my creation and then we talk about it.

There is no object or idea that I aim to paint it’s more about the colours and patterns that evolve during the session and we discuss them afterwards. I find it fascinating.

 In my most recent session my therapist said that talking isn’t necessary at all , as the art acts as the ‘expression ‘ . I could immediately see how children would benefit from this.

 I have found that I ‘reflect ‘ a lot on what evolves.

The link to the course you shared looks fascinating. If I were you I would go.

 I did also attended a group workshop ( there were 4 of us) lead by the same therapist which also gave insight to myself.

 2) Re. the food and cheese in particular it was Ayurvedic Lady who told me soft white cheeses only ( low oestrogen content as I am ER+), regular medics have not banned anything food wise . All they said was ‘no scientific evidence to link anything in one’s diet to breast cancer ‘. I just kept reading around. I love Stilton and had a bit. H1 advises me to ‘listen to my body ‘ and eat whatever I want but he draws a line at any flesh as he is vegetarian ( did that fish want to die ? did you think about it’s life blah blah).

What else, my Mum, smoked ( not heavy) , drinks in moderation, ate whatever she wanted ( never dieted in her life) never took vitamins, doesn’t pop pills ( a good thing as thalidomide was offered to her for morning sickness way back 😱) she thinks that my disease is due to stress and the mad pace of life that is considered ‘normal’ these days.

We have had this tune on tap today:

Music to keep you calm

as we both hate being told what to do 😬

Good night, sleep tight 🙃

 

 

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Re: February starters 2019 - yes, we rule!

Edinbird, I’m  just behind you, My last T will be on the 5th June, no date for radiotherapy as yet. 

I wont be having anymore scans so my oncologist told me last week. Not sure how I feel about that. 

Possibly on meds for 6 months before ovaries out, and unsure on reconstruction date. 

Im like you implausible I like to know what’s going on and when( control freak in me). I feel that’s what I’ve lost control of most with Barry!!

 

currently haven’t got up to much today, very lazy and lots of aches and pains. Currently having a nice hot flush, not looking forward to more of theses. 

 

My heart goes out to you Sandra watching your child in pain is the worse, hopefully someone can help out💕

 

We are nearly through stage one ladies we can do this 💪

 

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Re: February starters 2019 - yes, we rule!

Implausible/Sarah, she needs a turn around, she will feel better, it was to much, cancer/mastectomy/my own illness/unemployment/financial issues... I keep telling her that she is my hero, nobody can cope with all of this at the same time!

 

So glad you are better, I am sure that it will keep like this.

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Re: February starters 2019 - yes, we rule!

Hi Edinbird 

my  last T is 7th june do I’m still behind ya! When my temp is either fly high or really cold I give myself 2 hours to try and regulate which helps - currently having hot flush the joys but I feel better than last time - try for a reduction if you can. Had my mri and they said it should look at my  lymph nodes should get my results in 2 wks then appt for surgeon after last T. 

 

Onwards and upwards you are nearly there  keep strong ❤️❤️

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Re: February starters 2019 - yes, we rule!

:catsad:  there must be something that they could prescribe to at least help V a little?  Beta blockers maybe?  They are supposed to be safer/milder? 

 

In better news, happy to report that my temp is now safely back in the happy range.  Phew!

 

I don't want to go back inside!!! :catvery-happy:

 

 

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Re: February starters 2019 - yes, we rule!


@Implausible wrote:

You will all be delighted to hear that I have now showered and changed!  My household have taken the pegs off their noses :cathappy:

Although don't ever let me go to prison as I dropped the soap about 20 times!!!

 

Sandra.....  is it time for a visit to the GP to get V some medication for her anxiety/depression??  It sounds to me like she could do with a little help there, and it seems that a few of our ladies on the forum have found that little extra medical nudge to be helpful.....

 

As I kind of touched on earlier, I am lucky really that I tend to be able to keep- if not upbeat - fairly chill most of the time when it comes to mental state/moods.   I occasionally feel a bit fed up when I am under the weather , like today.  But never for long and never too negatively.   My mantra for the bad bits is "come on Sarah, rest up and wait it out".... and that seems to be enough to keep me in fairly good spirits.

 

It must be absolutely unbearable to have not only the physical symptoms to deal with but also strong moods/anxieties/ depression.  If it happened to me I'd like to think that I would be asking the GP to throw everything they can at that just as they would a physical symptom. 

 

Please reassure her at least that she is not alone and we are all rooting for her.  And hopefully the further she gets from her last chemo, the better she will start to feel x

 

Marlyn.... apparently I don't have to be tattooed for the rads, so the lady on the phone said.  But I have no idea why not.  Surely everyone has to?  I guess I will find out more when I get there!  Am hoping they can fit me in the day after my next T dose before the steroids wear off and the side effects hit me....

 

 



@Implausible wrote:

You will all be delighted to hear that I have now showered and changed!  My household have taken the pegs off their noses :cathappy:

Although don't ever let me go to prison as I dropped the soap about 20 times!!!

 

Sandra.....  is it time for a visit to the GP to get V some medication for her anxiety/depression??  It sounds to me like she could do with a little help there, and it seems that a few of our ladies on the forum have found that little extra medical nudge to be helpful.....

 

As I kind of touched on earlier, I am lucky really that I tend to be able to keep- if not upbeat - fairly chill most of the time when it comes to mental state/moods.   I occasionally feel a bit fed up when I am under the weather , like today.  But never for long and never too negatively.   My mantra for the bad bits is "come on Sarah, rest up and wait it out".... and that seems to be enough to keep me in fairly good spirits.

 

It must be absolutely unbearable to have not only the physical symptoms to deal with but also strong moods/anxieties/ depression.  If it happened to me I'd like to think that I would be asking the GP to throw everything they can at that just as they would a physical symptom. 

 

Please reassure her at least that she is not alone and we are all rooting for her.  And hopefully the further she gets from her last chemo, the better she will start to feel x


Sarah, medication for anxiety or depression is a no-no for her. We have spoken many times with her neurologist about this, and it have a negative impact in her situation related to her migraines.

Brains are really annoying!

I think that a therapy using pattern modification would be the best for her, but... she has to want it, and I completely understand when she says that she has enough on her plate for now.

Funny, I use the same method you use to surpass situations. I was a depressive person all my life, but my external behaviour is completely different. Nobody would peg me for a person with such nightmarish thoughts :cathappy:

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Re: February starters 2019 - yes, we rule!

Hi. girls

Just seen this on FB thought it was appropriate for all of us. IMG_20190518_180803.jpg