I seem to remember I was an emotional wreck after my mastectomy and diagnosis #5. I had to wait 89 days to start chemo, Christmas Eve 2018, and I was terrified as I have had emetophobia all my life (fear of vomiting). The hospital was very supportive and once I started chemo, I was just a physical wreck!
It seems normal to feel emotional after chemo. Your body is at its most vulnerable and deep down you know there are risks (or why else would you have an emergency number and strict instructions what to do when you hit 38C - temperature, not boobs -?) as well as unknowns like new side effects. Chemo is also a reminder of what exactly is wrong. That’s emotional enough. It may not feel comfortable but, in your case, it’s not continual, which is good. If you need someone to talk to and can’t get hold of your breast care nurse, I strongly recommend the nurses’ helpline, number top right. They offer an amazing service. They are knowledgeable, experienced and, above all, they listen and support. Worth a try!
There are NHS endorsed apps like Headspace and Calm which provide guidance on techniques like mindfulness, deep breathing and meditation. I found my answer in a series of videos by Progressive Hypnosis on YouTube, starting with Calm Anxiety and moving onto to ones relating to emotional distress, healing and sleep. There’s no doubt it required daily practice, whatever your source, but it pays off. Abdominal breathing is good for calming emotions and anxiety and, once it’s become a habit, you can call on it in an instant and avoid emotional overload.
Once you hit the halfway mark, you’ll feel more optimistic - I’ve got this far so I might as well keep going; only x more to go now - but it IS daunting facing so many unpleasant and frequent treatments. I’d consider feeling an emotional wreck a small price to pay when you could be riddled with physical side effects (.as well which you don’t mention so I’m making an assumption you’re ok so far?). Good luck with the rest of your treatments and consider a visit to the YouTube Search for Progressive Hynosis. I’m off there now for my daily practice.