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Feeling scared

8 REPLIES 8
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Member

Re: Feeling scared

Thank you Jaybro, that really does help to put things not perspective & is a very helpful article 

sonia x

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Member

Re: Feeling scared

Thank you so much Evie for sending me this link, it has made me feel a lot better

sonia x

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Community Champion

Re: Feeling scared

 

Sonia - I don’t know if you have seen this latest post too. Xx

https://forum.breastcancernow.org/t5/Recovering-from-treatment/Feeling-good/m-p/1336418#M48086

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Member

Re: Feeling scared

Hi Sonia

I’m sorry your plagued by these fears. My breast care nurse was very good at helping me put things in perspective. If you have a 90% chance of no recurrence, you can think it won’t come back (and you will probably be right - camp 1) or think it will come back (and you’ll probably be wrong - but what effect will it have had on the quality of your life? Camp 2). She suggested the healthier option would be to accept that it might come back (remote possibility) but live in the now (It’s not here now; I don’t have breast cancer). You can move between camps but, with time, you spend more and more time in the ‘I don’t have it right now’ camp.

Most of us who are regulars on the forum are seeking mutual support because something isn’t right. I’m free of breast cancer (75% chance of no recurrence - camp 1) but I’m plagued with chemo side effects still. Tbh, I’d be pretty pissed off to keep reading happy success stories, though I’m sure there is a forum for those - they should be celebrated.

There is a very helpful article that was posted by one of the nurses once. Here is the link. https://www.workingwithcancer.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2013/03/After-the-treatment-finishes-then-wha...There may be something in it that resonates with you. The fact is, we are all different. Our breast cancers have all been different and how we’ve dealt with it has been different. We have to accept we might be unlucky like X, Y or Z - but we may be like A, B, C, D .... V, W, whose stories we don’t get to hear because they aren’t newsworthy.

Hope the article helps x

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Community Champion

Re: Feeling scared

Hi SoniaC - I understand totally how you feel, as I’m sure everyone else reading your post will too. I remember reading a few years ago a thread about positive stories - I’m going to try to post the link - https://forum.breastcancernow.org/t5/Coping-with-fear-and-anxiety/Where-are-the-positive-stories/m-p...

Let me know if the link works. If you search for “positive stories” across the forum you will find others, this was one I remembered having read at the time.

Sending you big hugs. One thing I try to remember from a book I have is that thoughts are NOT facts. Evie xx

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Member

Re: Feeling scared

Hi Sonia, 

I'm sorry you haven’t had any further replies. I do think that as people start to move forward they use the support forums less. 

I’m struggling to move on just yet as I’ve found the emotions post treatment very difficult. People mention PTSD and I think that’s a good description but in a mild form. At times I feel numb about things and others I’m as upset as I was going through treatment. 

Ive started talking to a counsellor again which I think will take some time but feel it will help. Straight after treatment I thought I should be back to normal and rushed into everything, counselling, courses etc almost to prove to myself and others I was trying everything I could to get over it. Needless to say it didn’t work as I wasn’t ready. 

I met a lovely lady at a Moving Forward course, 8 weeks post treatment who told me this was too soon. She was over 12 months post treatment. She kept telling me to put everything on hold for a year as I wasn’t ready, how right she was!! 

That could be very true for you too. The shock and enormity of it can hit at any time and perhaps some help would be what you need for now. 

Take care of yourself xx

 

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Member

Re: Feeling scared

Thank you so much for your response Lucy. I haven’t had counselling but will take your advise in calling the BC care nurses. 
we really do need to hear more success stories as I am sure there must be plenty of people out there who have been cancer free for years.

i do hope you are doing well after your treatment?

 

thanks again & all the best

 

sonia

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Member

Re: Feeling scared

Hi Sonia, 

i haven’t got any reassuring stories I can tell you as I’m 13 months on from treatment but didn’t want to pass by without commenting. 

I’m really sorry you’re feeling like this, it’s hard trying to move on. Unfortunately I don’t think anyone is the same after a cancer diagnosis and stories in the media seem to be everywhere. I wish there were more success stories to reinforce how far treatment has come and that many women never encounter cancer again. 

When you finished treatment did you have any support? It sounds like you’re struggling with what happened and wondered if you had had any counselling? If you did you could always go back to it. Alternatively the nurses at Breast Cancer Now are fantastic to talk to. They would understand how you’re feeling and be able to give you support/reassurance you need. 

I hope you hear from others who are further down the line to give you the help you need xx 

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Member

Feeling scared

I was diagnosed with stage 1 breast cancer October 2016, had mastectomy & now on tamoxifen. Oncotype test revealed low risk of recurance (10%)
doing pretty well but every time I hear about a celebrity who’s breast cancer has returned I have a complete meltdown. The lasted being today, on hearing that Jacquie Beltrao’s had returned under 7 years after being first diagnosed. I understand her original diagnosis was caught early so it is really upsetting that it should return so soon. Please give me some success stories of long term survivors. Thank you