Frightened and stressed today

[Kay0987]

I'm trying. I am one to educate myself about every little detail. Can't help it because I do find it fascinating on one hand but the fact that it's me I'm researching is scary. Good and bad about being an educated patient but right now mostly bad because I am still at the beginning of my journey and have yet to wrap my head around the forever changes. Ended up being on-line researching one gene they mentioned in my report for about six hours yesterday. Won't do it today because the simple fact is that I read everything on-line yesterday. It's like I'm trying for a fake oncologist degree. Anyway thank you for your kind words and your reminder that my mindset is a main problem right now. I have a therapist appointment on Monday so I'm going to actively start working on how to think positively especially since I am driven to research. Got to figure out how to cope better. Much love sent your way....

[Jaybro]

Hi Kay

All I can say is you are a LONG way from any kind of demise. I can’t comment on treatments but, if you’re offered chemo, take it. It’s not nice but it’s manageable. You may think 2 or 3% difference isn’t worth it but statistics are so misleading and you might be the person it makes 90% difference to.

There is a lot in what you have written that points to a good outcome so spend this time working on that anxiety and morbid thoughts. I’m Stage 4 Triple Negative and even I don’t think about the endgame - I just focus on now. I attribute that to my daily meditation (euphemism) using a video by Progressive Hypnosis, free on YouTube. In fact, I’m off to do it now.

Best of luck xx

[Kay0987]

Done with double mastectomy and drains were out as of yesterday so really healing up quite well at a week and half out. Met with the surgeon yesterday to go over pathology report and I for whatever reason always get freaked out discussing anything related to my cancer with professionals. Even if a lot of it is good. I overthink and essentially decide I am going to die. So I'm looking for perspective and information. No cancer in lymph nodes or lymphatic system detected which I know is great. But the IDC tumor was 32mm. The "area of concern" was originally 36mm but most of that they thought would be DCIS which doesn't go into staging and I was counting on that I guess you could say. Well the area of concern ended up being significantly smaller which was good, but all IDC which is not good. So my surgeon said I was stage 2B. But with the new staging system which I thought everyone followed I hit stage 1B (ER/PR positive, node negative, T2 tumor, HER2 negative, and grade 3). Does it matter? Am I still considered early stage with local spread? And will only my oncotype score go into chemo need? Anyway I sent these questions by e-mail to my oncologist and she said she'll be glad to talk about it at my next appointment which is almost two weeks from now. That's a lot of time to sit on my butt and ponder my demise. Can anyone shed some info? Thank you all so much!