Need Hug or Kick up the Backside

[delly]

Happy New Year to all you ladies on here.

Hope you're all well and your anxiety's not running high. That post about Hypno below, isn't any advertising by the way. I just added a note to it. I don't personally know the lady in the videos, but if you haven't already watched them, they're very interesting, explain a lot about how anxiety and depression is "created" chemically, and how Hypno combined with  CBT or NLP works.

Hope you're getting on all right with your new bone meds, Jill

Lots of love to everyone, Delly xxxx

[delly]

Sorry, meant to ask both you and Gill,

Whether either of you have ever tried Hypnotherapy for your anxiety? I have a good friend who is one, and obtains really good results for it. It's been documented that plain "talk" therapy/counselling can only serve to reinstall or reinstate/fuel your upsets, therefore often increasing your upset, as oppo help sort. Whereas Hypnotherapy, espesh when combined with CBT or NLP, teaches you ways to better "deal" with your actual sources of anxiety without just re-iterating over the same experiences. It's all about developing new neural/mental pathways in your head through different thinking techniques, whereas re-iteration (plain talk therapy) just maintains the already existing ones, where your thought processes don't alter. Whenever you think positively, it releases small amounts of the more positive hormones: seratonin (especially), dopamine, oxytocin which have a direct effect in your brain. The more you think the same +ve thoughts, the more the positive hormones build up and start creating a direct effect on your "thinking" area of the brain and cells . Whereas anxiety produces Cortisol and Adrenaline - the fight/fright hormone - make you tense, jittery.  

Here's a couple of video links of a Hypnotherapists explanation. This ISN'T my friend by the way, and I'm NOT advertising for this lady either, I assure you.

 https://oldtownhypnotherapy.co.uk/old-town-hypnotherapy-blog/anxiety-depression/how-to-help-anxiety-...

https://oldtownhypnotherapy.co.uk/old-town-hypnotherapy-blog/anxiety/where-does-anxiety-come-from/ 

This lady specialises in treating Anxiety and Depression, due to her own experiences, and were a large part of her quitting a highly pressured job in marketing management, to retrain as a Hypnotherapist.

Hope it helps, Delly xxxxxx

[delly]

Hi Jill

How've you been going on with your new bone meds? Have you been any better with?

Delly x x x

[Jill1998]

Gill - anxiety is the most horrible thing - yes sertraline didn't agree with me at all but worth trying diffferent ones ? I found CBT helped me a lot - but took time .Sometimes anxiety can be very unpredictable and not always any logic behind flare up -horrible x 

[Gill3105]

Ohhhh has to pop in on this one.   You guys talking about me??? 😂😩👍💓.   2 years down the road and anxiety though the roof at times.  Jill I was prescribed Seteraline.  Awful drug 2 days on it and had to come off it after day 3  Side effects were dreadful.   Tried 3rd day and def a no go.  One hour or so after after taking Whole body contents decided to eject from my arse!!! sorry bout the French.   Without warning,  was mortified but as you do think it will go nope it didn’t day 3 I had to stop and worst thing was my gP didnt really believe me.  But was a case of toilet what toilet!!!  No way.   So had a bit of councelling.  Again think this all depends on how to react with that person .  I am a hard person to crack and I admit that but I am also and open honest person.  Anyway here I am 65 years old and we went back to my childhood!!   Hmmm why was my question so hoMe I came feeling even more deflated.  Maybe this is how it works but right then it wasn’t for me.  Like most of us we know why we are feeling anxious, maybe depressed etc etc and maybe need a little guidance through it and a bit of advice on how to handle it maybe a tad better than we are.   I honestly think and this is from the heart.  Nobody knows the effects and chat of BC unless Been there.  Talk to someone who has been through it and they get it and know exactly what we are talking about.   So to the reason for me popping in here.  Yes been away from the forum actively for a while but still read it.   Jill1998 you mention in o e of the threads an anxiety thread??   Definitely as think may help us all.   Xxx.  And thanks to the lady who started the thread xx 

[SavrinaLilW]

Yo! That's sound good! Best wishes! Do you know something about karma and numbers? Maybe it could help you and become your amulet? As for me, it gives me a kind of hope. Check the number 6666 meaning. It is a very good and significant number for all, who is ill. Good luck!

[ladybowler]

Mayson

I replied to you on the Coffee Lounge section, just echoing really what Jill has said.

We are all here to help and support you in whatever way we can, the lovely ladies on here know exactly what you are going through you are not alone xxx

[Jill1998]

Mayson go talk to your doctor ,it is very common to suffer from anxiety and /or depression after your treatment ends .A lot of us need support in form of medication or counselling or CBT .Most of us feel a lot better after getting some support .You are not on your own and not unusual in feeling this way .Thinks do get better but you may need a bit of help to get there .Your body and mind has been through a major shock -it takes time to recover .

[Mayson]

Hi i am right weeks post ok breast cancer i have all your symptoms getting me down cannot see a end to it please tell me there is

[ladybowler]

Mishy

Oh you are soooo right.  It has been a tough couple of days.  Seemed to have a real dry hacking cough now which is annoying me, I have a drink by me all the time but it keeps catching me out, however on the whole from where I was on Tuesday I have improved so much.  I have only got today and tomorrow on the antibiotics so hopefully that will have sorted it out.  I am going to the Docs Monday/Tuesday just to get checked out in case they think I need more but fingers crossed that is it xxx

[Mishy18]

Helena i hope you are feeling a little better today its probably just as well they didn't go ahead with the op till you are all better xx

[ladybowler]

Nicola

Thank you for your lovely words.

Just got back from the docs have a mild lower respiratory tract infection so on antibiotics for 5 days.  They have told me to come back immediately if it gets worse over the next few days or is no better by Monday, he has signed me off until my op xxx

[Kiki2]

Sorry Helena I’ve just seen your other post, you must be gutted to have to wait! I remember being paranoid that they would cancel my mastectomy! Really hoping all goes smoothly for 9th for you, best wishes Nicola xx

[Kiki2]

Sorry Helena I’ve just seen your other post, you must be gutted to have to wait! I remember being paranoid that they would cancel my mastectomy! Really hoping all goes smoothly for 9th for you, best wishes Nicola xx

[ladybowler]

Mishy

My thoughts exactly, I said to the Sister today when I am going to have things go my way for a change, it is two years this week that I was diagnosed with bc and I was hoping that 2018 would have been the year that I started looking forward but unfortunately not for the moment, hey ho to 2019 and a brand new start. 

You are in my thoughts for next week and also for the 9th October, we are both going to have good news, I absolutely insist on it, we need to turn the corner.

It is very windy in Birmingham today and we have just had a heavy shower so no chance to be outside even if I felt like it. 

Oh I am so staying away from anyone who could put me at risk of n ot having the op on the 9th I promise

Sending you hugs

Helena xxx

[Mishy18]

My typos are bad 😂

[Mishy18]

Thats unfortunate but at least its to keep you safe, best to avoid people in meantime that might be carrying stuff well the sun is out today i know we are due some strong winds but im going to di a little light pruning in meantime to keep ne sane
I got my scan dates for next wek (head) and c spine 9th October rhen after that i will find out my fate re op
Don't know about you but i was kind of hoping after the bc stuff surgery and scans would be a thing of the past!

[ladybowler]

Mishy

I am sorry to report that it was cancelled today as I have a cold and when they checked my temperature was too high and my oxygen levels were not high enough, so rebooked for 9 October and I am off to the docs tomorrow to check if I need antibiotics.  I am keeping away from everyone for the next 3 weeks to give myself every chance to have the op.

Helena xxx

[Mishy18]

Helena thinking of you hope you make a speedy recovery from your op remember to not over do it afterwards z

[ladybowler]

Mishy

Thank you my friend for your lovely encouraging words.

xxxx

[Mishy18]

Oh not too long now Helena its tge waiting around that's worse i find, your work sound fab about it all which is good knowing they support you 👍
I keep reminding myself that really my situation with redundancy was for the best in the end as i wouldn't be able to work with my neck the way it is anyway, im really dreading my app with neuro surgeon as im worrying about the type of surgery involved but i have to be sensible too they wouldn't want to do it if it wasn't needed
Just adjusting to life on the other side of bc was hard enough so this should be a walk in the park in comparison to the bc stuff
Helena your op too you will find will also be a much easier thing to get over both mentally and physically xxx

[ladybowler]

Mishy

Hiya its just over three weeks now, 18 sept, all of a sudden it is very close.

Work have been incredible I am saying I want to aim to back at work 6 weeks after they are saying 8-10 and then only on reduced hours or working from home, really got to me xx

[Woodsy]

strangely, I havent lost a minutes sleep since my diagnosis - I find it difficult to get out of bed though.  My joints are all sore, which may be because of my age and the onset of menopause (arent we women lucky?!).    I have a Maggie's centre not too far from me so might go along there.  My GP has been really supportive of me, and has offered antidepressants, but Im so sick of taking pills and suffering the side effects.  What about motivation? Does the CBT help with that?  Yes, its ironic that my work have been less than supportive, given what they do.  Im trying not to be bitter and see it as an opportunity to move jobs and start afresh, the timing stinks however.  Who will want to employ a woman my age, who is returning after cancer treatment and might need to start as a part time employee? 

[Jill1998]

The Magnesium oil helped me a lot with sleep - you spray it on at various points around your body at night and rub it in- Supposed to be a lot more effective than taking the supplements - can lead to quite vivid dreams though !!

[Mishy18]

Woodsy thats awful and ironic about work yeah i think once we can't do our jobs its bye see you later 😨 i found counselling at my local Maggies Centre an absolute saviour for me in terms with my anxiety during and after treatment i know i could still revisit it too once you have had a diagnosis even if not having active treatment ir finshed treatment and NED so you could always visit them if you have a local centre as gp referal would take ages Jill im liking the sound of thr magnesium stuff and i wonder about the acupuncture as i never tried it
Lots of courses goung on in local Cancer centres for mindfulness anxiety etc too x

[Jill1998]

CBT has helped me with anxiety and Magnesium oil with sleep I also go for acupuncture.Anti- depressants made me feel worse .

[Woodsy]

so, any advice on dealing with the anxiety and lack of motivation? I dont want to go onto antidepressants - I would quite like to, if I can, deal with this without medical intervention! 

[Jill1998]

You couldn't make it up could you - they don't seem to give a stuff once you are not quite up to the job anymore .☹️

[Woodsy]

My boss made me use sick leave when I was going through diagnostic tests, despite being owed lots of annual leave and hours already worked.  Then I didnt get my wage rise because I was off getting treatement, and when I went back during my treatment, she gave my work away to someone else because I couldnt offer consisitency to the role as I had more treatment to get.  Then she said I lied about all of that!  BTW i work for a large UK based cancer charity...

[Jill1998]

Id worked there 26 years - didn't even get a card - just my P45 !!!

[Mishy18]

Haha its really bad nit 🐜 like the Nit nurse 😨
Ooh i know what you mean about the benefits thing its demoralising isn't it in a way makes you question yourself but yeah wolly i ended up being made redundant and didn't even get a good luck card when i finished, don't get me wrong while i was poorly i had cards of support flowers and even a collection from woekmates then strangley enough whrn treat ended and they knew cancer was gone i became a distant memory too i didn't expect a gift as they had already been so kind but it upset me that after a long time working there it wasn't acknowledged i was leaving 🤔 strange isn't it 😂😂

[Jill1998]

Nit very good your predictive text Mishy 😃

[Mishy18]

Sorry but predictive text keeps saying nit instead of not 😨

[Mishy18]

Hi everyone btw hoping everyone is getting along ok Helena nit long now till your op sebding you a bit of 👭💪 xx

[Jill1998]

Hello Woodsy - sending you a hug not a kick up the behind !!! When treatment ends it's certainly not the end of the **** is it ? But very hard for those around us to understand the toll it takes and the ongoing physical and mental issues .Its a pile of 💩sometimes ☹️I too have lost my job after treatment left me too unwell and employers decided they wanted shut of me - just been through humiliating process of applying for benefits for the first time since I was 21 - and that's a long time ago !! Hope you feel better soon - lots of support here from people who understand .Jillx

[Mishy18]

Sounds like you need a hug so you came to the right place these lovely ladies don't mind a bit of letting iff steam and have frequently given me a hug and kick up the backside when i have needed one we all have similar stories im nit working atm either never got back made redundant and having some non cancer related upper spine problems and still have got no get up and go im 47 xxx
Im sure our lovely ladies will be along soon to also give you a virtual hug too xxx

[Woodsy]

HI everyone. Im very late to the conversation.  What Mary has described is exactly how Im feeling at the moment.  Im also feeling very sorry for myself, the first since my diagnosis in November 2016.  I struggled at first, not with the diagnosis, but with the treatment plan - double mastectomy.  I fought that, as the cancer was only found in one breast, so I had one removed.  I have many ups and downs, and as it stands, I am still waiting on a skin graft to create a new nipple, replacing the one I lost.  My work hasnt been supportive and I have been off since september last year.  Sorry - thats very long!  Anyway, I am now trying to find a new job, which is difficult for a 49 year old woman who is recovering from cancer treatment, I have very little energy.  My get up and go, has got up and gone.  I feel so anxious at times, it takes my breath away!  My family, I think, feel I should be back at work now as I am cancer free, but I actually feel worse now than I have ever felt.  I think I probably need a kick up the backside. I even joined a gym and have only gone 3 times in a month!

[Jill1998]

Hi Delly I have to have nuclear bone scan as they are still not sure what is going on.

[delly]

Hi Huggers

I hope you're all doing better, even if only a smidge.

Sue - How did your course go, did/have you found it helpful?

Rachy - That's great to hear. Long may it continue, flower.

Rubes - Glad to hear your knee's feeling better. How are the wrists and hands, now you've shed the splints??

Jill - How are you doing now and what news on your legs??

Loads of love

Doolally xxxxxxx

[Jill1998]

Thanks Delly for the good wishes .

[Jill1998]

Thanks Ruby ,I don't have a good feeling about what's going on with my legs as they saw unexplained bone loss on my x Ray - guess I will just have to deal with it and hope that any treatment will help the symptoms ( at least in the short term ) and give me some mobility back .

[Jill1998]

That's great to hear Rachy.

[rubycat]

Now that is good news Rachy. 

No Delly, old Rubes is a common or garden muted tortoiseshell (grey, cinnamon & white). Completely gorgeous.  Might have been Bethyboo or Charys with mainecoon.  Sue, my son has a bengal, now over a year old, and exceedingly talkative.  He also is allergic to cat fur, and has had no problems with her.

I do hope you are getting some answers now Jill. It's so debilitating this constant pain, really feel for you.

I'm on my way to feeling better, ouchy knee exercises seem to be doing some good & back to physio next week when I hope to take off these hot & uncomfy wrist splints so I can do some exercises & put hands right.

Moijan & Belle - thinking of you with hope that things are not too bad. xxx

[Rachy65]

Hi everyone!
Just to let you know I'm feeling alot better than this time last year xx

[Sue C]

Sorry Delly.....predicted text x

[Sue C]

Hi Sally

Yes, it's the same thing.

My course starts next week, so I'll let you know how i get on. I think a lot of it is common sense.......pacing yourself, healthy diet, moderate exercise etc.

Sue xx

[delly]

Hi Girls,
Rubes and Jill, have been catching up on you elsewhere. Am so sorry you're both still suffering.
Sue - Is ME the same as CF? I know ME causes nasty fatigue, but didn't know if they were two different illnesses. I'm asking, because a friend has CFS too. Isn't it thought that ME is related to the Glandular Fever virus? Was the course you went on helpful for it? Any tips I can pass on to her?
Lots of love to you all
xxxxxx

[Sue C]

Thanks Delly! He is a real live wire at the moment..... A bit of a handful!! Xx

[delly]

Sue - Your beautiful kitty reminds me of the Whiskars puss on the adverts. You may be able to make a few ££s with him in advertising in a year or so xxx
I'm hoping you're all okay or feeling better, as it's very quiet on here, or is it me that's put you all off, bar Jobey. Thanks Jobes.
Jill and Rubes, how are you both going on with your joints? That's the boney variety, not the wackybacky sort. Though that type may do you some good!! 🙂
Loadsa love
Dellywelly xxxxxxxx