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Newly diagnosed, waiting to see how bad

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Member

Re: Newly diagnosed, waiting to see how bad

Hi leilankita

 

I remember that feeling so well, I was knocked sideways by my diagnosis, mine was high grade DCIS, and every appointment I went to the news seemed to get worse and worse. I had two operations to remove the cancer and another two on the other side to create a match, plus radiotherapy and tamoxifen.

 

But I can see now that I was very lucky that it was DCIS,  I'm two years past treatment and it is in the past, I have about a 95% chance that this will not come back. The cosmetic results have turned out okay, I prefer my new smaller shape.

 

This stage seems overwhelming when you're first diagnosed, it feels like the world has collapsed around you. But you will get treated, and hopefully you will come out the other side and get your life back on track,  this experience changes the way you look at life. But there is a future after treatment, and life will be good again.

Sending you a hug

Xxx

 

 

 

 

 

Community Champion

Re: Newly diagnosed, waiting to see how bad

Hi and welcome to the forum.

 

Im guessing you mean High Grade DCIS? 

I know it's really hard when you get a diagnosis and the word cancer scares the living daylights out of you but DCIS really is one of the better ones to get, it's in situ so hasn't been able to go off on a wander else where like an invasive cancer can. You will feel so much better once you know exactly what your treatment plan is. 

 

The early hours alone with your thoughts really is the worst time but it gets better 😊XxJo 

Member

Re: Newly diagnosed, waiting to see how bad

I just my diagnosis.Grade 4 DCIS.Feel so lost.

Community Champion

Re: Newly diagnosed, waiting to see how bad

Hi Fi,
Well, you’re further down the road now & have a plan to get Humphrey dealt with, so that’s good. It wont get much bigger within a newly diagnosed time frame, it’s just because we tend to become hyper aware after diagnosis.
I did not have a TN diagnosis, but from what I’ve seen here, it generally responds well to chemo.
ann x
Community Champion

Re: Newly diagnosed, waiting to see how bad

I saw the oncologist yesterday, chemo starts on 26 Oct. I've got to have an MRI and clip fitted first though. She did confirm it's triple negative. I never know what's bad or really bad. I've accepted that I have BC, but it was good to hear it's not terminal. However Humphrey is playing up today, feels a bit different, more prominent. I'm hoping it's because I'm due a period in about 5 days time but any words of wisdom would be much appreciated 💜 Fiona
Community Champion

Re: Newly diagnosed, waiting to see how bad

Thanks Ann.

Thursday I'll know more and start getting ready to fight the battle that so many of you have already faced.  I'm getting anxious about it, but I know I need it to get me healthy again and to continue to enjoy my wonderful life with my fantastic husband.  I know you ladies will help me so much.

I'll let you all know how I get on.

Fiona x Heart

Community Champion

Re: Newly diagnosed, waiting to see how bad

Thanks Janie - I can't wait for that day to come, it seems so far away at the moment.  I'm getting slightly daunted by what the chemo is going to involve and how I'm going to feel but I'm going to fight this battle and win.  

You lovely ladies are so encouraging and so kind, it's absolutely wonderful.

Fiona x Heart

Community Champion

Re: Newly diagnosed, waiting to see how bad

Hi Chick

We had a great weekend, thank you, and it took my mind off BC.  I'm in work today and "normal" life feels good.  I'm sure that will all change once I've seen the oncologist on Thursday afternoon but for now, I'm enjoying what I can. Pelvis scan due on Saturday but hopefully that'll just show it's fibroids - something else to deal with!

I find I'm dealing with it in an almost surreal way at the moment.  It was such a relief to hear that it could be treated, that it hadn't spread.  No doubt come Thursday afternoon I'll be getting all wound up again but at least I'll have a good idea of what I'm about to face.

Hope you're well?

Fiona xHeart

Community Champion

Re: Newly diagnosed, waiting to see how bad

Hello Fiona,

Glad your appointment went well and you are feeling more positive about things. Hope you have a lovely weekend away at your family celebration 🎉
All the best, 🐥 X
Member

Re: Newly diagnosed, waiting to see how bad

Hi Fiona
I am so relieved!!! I was thinking of you so much yesterday. This will all be a distant memory one day.
Best wishes
Jane
Community Champion

Re: Newly diagnosed, waiting to see how bad

That’s brill, Fil...& definitely not wrong at all!!
Fortunately, as bc gets picked up earlier it is unsual for it to have gone anywhere else when diagnosed, but inevitably, the anxiety monster bites when going through this.
Even though we wouldn’t think so beforehand, it is a relief when the treatment plan is confirmed.
Onwards & upwards!
ann x
Community Champion

Re: Newly diagnosed, waiting to see how bad

Evening all
Is it wrong to say I'm so relieved that I only have primary breast cancer?
I was so scared this morning before my appointment, I was convinced it would be bad news, that it had spread and was terminal.
But the news was good 😂 Bone scan clear, CT scan showed a couple of problems, one of which was potential lymph problem in my neck/chest but ultrasound showed it was just fatty tissue. Other issue is potentially fibroids in my womb. So consultant confirmed it was primary 🤣 yay! Meeting with oncologist on Thursday and start chemo shortly after. I feel like a massive weight has been lifted and I have a life again 😃 so so pleased.
Community Champion

Re: Newly diagnosed, waiting to see how bad

Hello Fiona,

 

Thanks for your message.  Just wanted to wish you all the best for tomorrow.  I hope it all goes as well as it can and I hope you and hubby continue feeling that "strange calmness".

 

All the very best to you Fiona

 

Chick x

Community Champion

Re: Newly diagnosed, waiting to see how bad

Thank you Janie, trying to stay calm but the negative thoughts are coming back now. I just want to know so that I can deal with this. Xxx

Member

Re: Newly diagnosed, waiting to see how bad

Hi Fiona
Just wanted to say we are thinking about you for tomorrow. Do let us know how you get on. Remember, it is easier to bear once you know and have a treatment plan.
Xxx
Member

Re: Newly diagnosed, waiting to see how bad

Hi Fimillan I have a friend who had grade 3 invasive ductal this time last year she has had her lumpectomy and her treatment I met with her after I was diagnosed she is doing great a very sporty person who's a very keen hockey player and she's playing away. So keep positive it's not all bad news good luck and look forward to hearing how you get on 😍
Community Champion

Re: Newly diagnosed, waiting to see how bad

Hi Chick

Yesterday just got a bit too much for me.  I think because I'd had my family around me over the weekend and the first part of the week while I had the scans (and of course my husband), but yesterday I decided to face everybody at work so I was nervous about that (although the blokes just ignored it/me), and all my family had gone home.  When you're on your own, that's when all the thoughts start crowding in.  But after speaking to you all yesterday, a strange calmness took over me in the evening, and my husband felt the same.  Today I woke up without that enormous ball of fear in the pit of my stomach.  I've been working from home (fortunately, my husband is also my boss) and that's taken my mind off it too.  I'm still dreading tomorrow but at least we'll know exactly what we're dealing with.  

 

And we're away for the weekend, celebrating my dad and stepmum's 40th wedding anniversary so something to look forward to in the middle of all this anxiety.

 

I'm getting ready to fight this evil, once we know exactly what we're fighting.

 

Thank you for your support yesterday - it was greatly appreciated and much needed and, despite the horrible fact that we're all on this forum because of this disease, it's so good to know that there are plenty of people who really do understand what we're all going through.

 

Fiona x

 

Highlighted
Community Champion

Re: Newly diagnosed, waiting to see how bad

Hello again,

 

II am sending you a mega virtual hug and I hope you can feel it. It is so hard not knowing the ins and outs of what you are specifically dealing with.  I know it is hard but there is little you can do until Friday so be kind to yourself and do something you (and your hubby) enjoy whether it is going out somewhere, eating good food, whatever  - just something nice if you can.

 

What is it that is making you feel that you have "little hope"?  There's plenty of hope for any situation that may occur. I do know what you mean about "expecting the worst" because in a way, that is how I managed things to a degree; it was my way of coping and then I would ask myself "what is the worst that can happen and how will I deal with it?".  And goodness me, I had some good cries but in the end that is one way of releasing stress and anxiety build up.

 

I know the above may do little to help you specifically at the moment, but do ring the helpline or other support if it would help you to talk about it directly.  Strangers on the phone were my support of choice - I could cry, say my worse fears etc without worry of upsetting them or being guarded which would have been the case if I had been talking to someone close. 

 

And yes, you can "fight" it because there are many treatments in the arsenal so to speak that will be available for you as well as the inner resolve that you will no doubt start to feel when you have digested the shock and have more information which should give you back some control.   And that the point in a way, you have just received very distressing news and you need time to process it and come to terms with it.  It is not easy to do that ..............but I am sure you will get there.

 

All the best to you,

 

Chick X

 

Community Champion

Re: Newly diagnosed, waiting to see how bad

Thanks Janie, all your comments are so encouraging, which just makes me cry even more, hoping that I'll be in the same situation.
You all give so much hope to us newbies 😉
You're all inspiration to me x
Community Champion

Re: Newly diagnosed, waiting to see how bad

Hi Chick
I know you're right, that the waiting is needed. All I seem to be doing is crying.
I can see I'm going to get a lot of support from this forum and it's great to see that you're two years down the line, it's encouraging especially when I feel I have little to hope for at the moment.
I have no idea what to expect and that's what scares me most. But until Friday we just can't do anything.
I'm in a fog most of the time, I guess that's normal?
Friday seems such a long time away but the MDT don't meet until tomorrow to discuss my case. I keep thinking that if I expect the worst then anything less than that is good, but my brain doesn't want to accept that thought. I can't even be angry because what's the point? It's already got me, I just need to know if I can fight it or not x
Member

Re: Newly diagnosed, waiting to see how bad

Hi 

I was diagnosed on 1st June this year, and completely empathise with how you are feeling. I felt completely overwhelmed to begin with. However, I promise you, it does become easier to cope in time. The waiting is the worst part, as you say, as your mind imagines worst case scenarios. When you have a definite treatment plan it becomes easier to bear. You may not believe this now, but once you have a plan, all the women that I have met with breast cancer go into coping mode and seem to get an inner strength. 

 My practical advice would be only to go on to reputable websites such as this one. Don't look at statistics because when you are overwhelmed you will think of the negative outcome, when, for the vast majority of women, this is a ' blip' in our lives.

I can recommend a fantastic book- ' Tea and Chemo' by Jackie Buxton. It is packed with advice and postive words, and left me feeling very uplifted. It is actually often included in ' chemo gift sets' as it is just so positive.

 Don't run ahead of yourself- in the book, Jackie's father in law says ' A to B, B to C, C to D' and that really helped me. One stage at a time.

I have just one of six chemos left , two weeks today, then surgery. I feel that I can see light at the end of the tunnel and each day is a step closer to recovery. I feel so much more positive and less anxious than I did at the start, and you will too.

Whenever you feel anxious, come on to the forum. The supportive women on here will carry you through this.

Thinking of you.

Community Champion

Re: Newly diagnosed, waiting to see how bad

Hello FiMillan,

 

Sorry to hear about your diagnosis.  However, welcome to the Forum where I am sure you will receive lots of support and any  information you need.  As well as the Forum,  the BCC site is full of useful booklets and information that you can download, as well as the free phone helpline to talk about anything or for emotional support.  You can also link with a volunteer  through the "Someone like me" scheme is you would find that helpful. 

 

I was also diagnosed with Grade 3 Invasive ductal (Stage 2, ER+, HER2+) 2 years ago.  How quickly the time seems to have gone when I reflect on it now.

 

"The waiting is the worst part" - yes you are  absolutely spot on.  Waiting for tests, scans, biopsy, results, treatment blah blah but it is unfortunately all needed to help specifically diagnose the grade, stage and sensitivities of our intruder(s) and work out the best eviction plan.

 

That is brilliant that you are seeing the Consultant so soon so all the best for Friday.  I hope they have all the information available so that they can give you a clear treatment plan.  However, try not to worry if they do not and they need to run further tests or wait for some results.  It is quite normal even if mega frustrating and overwhelming.

 

Best wishes to you and your husband,

 

Chick X

 

 

 

 

Community Champion

Newly diagnosed, waiting to see how bad

Hi I've been diagnosed with Grade 3 Invasive ductal breast cancer. Words I never thought I'd say. My husband and I are really struggling to get through each day. Had bone scan on Monday, CT scan yesterday and seeing consultant on Friday to see if it's primary or secondary and how we're going to deal with it. This is so hard. I've never been really ill, don't feel ill now, I just have a lump in my breast that we thought was a cyst. But it turns out the cyst is cancer. How do you all cope with this? The waiting is the worst part.