I just re-read your post and you really need to be tested. Please do not put it off. I am suprised they would tell you not to. Run from them and find a genetic counselor to talk to. You can find them thru a cancer center or the American Cancer Society.
I had the genetic test for the BRCA gene and insurance paid for it. I wish I had heeded the letter sent to me from a familty member that it was possible that I had it. If I could do it over I would have had a mascectomy and hystorectomy. Going thru chemo for breast cancer was HELL. Try another doctor and somehow find the money for the test. I live in Florida and it was about $100+
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