Costume: knitted green and orange striped bikini. Knitted purple and yellow striped leg warmers ditto elbow length gloves. Lurex knee highs and purple bejewelled DMs - or maybe THOSE flipper shoes.
Character: drunk old witch who has no idea what she's doing there and can't understand why she can't stand upright as the floor seems to be perpetually moving. Handbag full of stolen about-to-go-off cream and goat's cheese (goats'
cheese?) - (see below!)
I parked opposite that exact same sign, FF (or rather, an identical one - as it was outside a house close to our nearest primary school, miles away from you!) so some numpty must actually SELL them!! It annoyed me so much when I saw it that I wanted to take a photo to post on here/Twitter but the homeowner was at the window, so I didn't have the barefaced cheek to do it. So glad I'm not the only one who feels that way!
Went to farm shop for lunch and fruit & veg shop today. At the till, while I was ordering the Christmas turkey, (had to fill in a little form) I asked OH to pack the last few items into the bags (having checked there was nothing fragile in the pile - he's a b****r for putting potatoes on top of grapes...or eggs! 😨)
When we got to the car, I saw a pot of cream in the top of one of the bags. I asked why he'd picked it up, as we had some in the fridge at home. He said he wondered what I wanted so much cream for. I looked and he'd only picked up ALL the on-date sale items off the counter by the till: 3 large pots of Jersey single cream, 3 mini plastic bottles of single cream, 2 packs of goats cheese and a pot of beetroot coleslaw!! They were by our paid-for goods so he just assumed they were ours too!!
I staggered back into the shop with these in my arms, and a very red face, and plonked them on the counter with a "Men! Can't trust them to do the simplest task!" and scarpered leaving bemused faces all around. I suppose they're only going to throw them away anyway, but I had no intention of stealing all that - and lord knows what I'd have done with a gallon of on-date cream!!!
Costume - Tiara, purple hip length tunic, ermine trimmed, crystals all over, a la Vicky Gill. Purple leather leggings , flashing trainers with more crystals.
Character - Evil second wife of Earl Whatsisname intent on making sure that HER son inherits the title........ not the son by his first wife!
I have seen a sign today, tautology at it's best......do I laugh or cringe? I am the grammar police! So I cringe. Sign says " No parking. 24 hour access required at all times." Really???
Weather lovely, fine sunny day, washing done and dried, just needs an airing on radiator tonight.
Right everyone, get your costumes sorted for the Benchland Trampo-Stravaganza (or BTS)!!!!!
Dame Grumpy will produce a script when you explain your character and costume.......
Lol yes , it's a bridal shop. With tiny windows 🙂 hmmm...would white pompoms look like snowballs????
Hey girls! Have you seen the new JL Christmas ad? Reminds me of something. Then the thought popped into my head: where's the ferret?
Trampolining. That should be our next spectacular production! 🙂
Turn a wedding dress into a Christmas tree shape and adorn with baubles, tinsel etc?
Arrange a wedding scene using reindeer?
Winter wonderland theme? Bride on skates, pageboys on sledges, groom on a ski doo, snowballs instead of a bouquet?
Oh, wait! It IS a bridal shop isn't it? If not, please ignore all the above - which probably have rather too much of a Benchland flavour anyway? 😛
Been at school until 5pm every night this week (paid until 3:30) TFI the weekend!!
CBA bench hereI come!
Headlamps or hump lamps JCJ??? Choose both and be bathed in light....
Hope the lido works Katy x
Ideas please for a Christmas window at my shop. Apparently it has to have a theme these days, you can't just put a tree up with pretty lights and tasteful colour coordinated baubles, oh deary me no.....
Dark and cold in the Loch tonight. I had to get Hump & Dink to swim in front of me wearing headlamps to light my way. They warmed the water for me - I hope it was just their body heat but I'm not going to investigate!! Look out for Nessy sightings in the local press, KTC!
Another 1700m swum. Firmly on the knackered bench and trying not to think about teaching Y5/6 class all day tomorrow!
Hope the Lido gives you some relief this time. Fingers crossed.
Why am I watching Americans on tv? Oh yes, there's an Event happening, and I'm drinking glitterberry juice with BF and doggies in front of the stove........
Snow forecast for tomorrow, so that and BFs knackered knee means no walk, but a day round the shops instead........ shame!!!!
Of course I shall be wearing them JCJ, along with a sparkly lycra top, pearls and tiara. I'm just going all out. I don't care what others in the waiting room might think. A smear test needs to make a statement! And it's my last one so needs to be celebrated. Might even go with with the long black wig!
Our forecasted frost did not happen, lovely morning here but rain this pm. School ok tonight.
Glad that everything is ok again Katy. Hope it stays that way.
Xmas shopping? I've been told what to buy for the grandchildren and SIL and DIL, so that's them sorted.. So you could say most of my Xmas shopping is done and probably will be done online after this is posted (there is nothing on tv tonight). Odds and ends on Thursday hopefully.
All sorted, woo hoo, thank you for your kind words. Thank goodness am soooooooo relieved, been a very long weekend.
Oh my FF, you will be gorgeous! I don't have a skirt either??
Good luck with your shop, know how much you love shopping!
Remember I was showing off re presents, well I forgot one sooooooooo last "big one" purchased this morning, now only have to buy sweets and fillers woo hoo!
Moi an organising, control freak, NEVER!!!
Are things calmer JCJ?
Will you be going through doc for help? xx
Are you going to wear knee highs and bejewelled purple DMs with your new skirt, FF? That'll give the nurse a treat! 🙂
Hope the medical emergencies have been sorted, KTC.
Proper frost here this morning. Bracing myself to go out and scrape the car. 😐
My fingers crossed too, hope all is well by now.
Getting chilly down here, must be worse for you as you are both further North. Went to charity shop to buy a skirt for the smear test. Sorted through an awful lot that were just "No, I'm not wearing that!" Eventually found one that I am willing to wear for an hour for £4. A tad tight but it's only for an hour at most, then I'll give it back to the Charity shop to sell again so they are in a win win situation.
Daughter came by this am. We've made a tentative plan to go Xmas shopping on Thursday.
Am glad JCJ that OH will have some help, fingers crossed he finds someone who excels and helps him realise why he has these outbursts and how to cope when he feels that way, difficult.
Have had an awful weekend here too family emergencies, illness hospitals etc, fingers crossed all is well by the end of today......................xx
That just sounds like a vicious circle of cause and effect. Yes , you have mentioned his mother and that must have had an awful effect on him. Hope you find a really good councellor that can help him now.
Fireworks - I've just watched a brilliant show from my own back garden, no cost to me, saved £6. Couldn't see the bonfire but not bothered about that. Great firework display.
Yesterday, I was in the kitchen, with the door shut, getting dinner and listening to radio, when I heard from door open and apparently slam really loudly. *Thinks* "Oh god! Here we go again! :(" But it wasn't OH storming about in a rage again .....just as he shut the door, perfectly calmly and quietly, someone let off a firework nearby! How dare they? And on firework night as well! Hahaha! Had me going for a moment!
Rained all morning, but it stopped long enough to go for a lovely walk to enjoy the autumn colours and kick a few leaves! Now to get the Sunday roast on so we can go and stand in the park like cheapskates and watch the Abbey fireworks. No point in paying £12 to go in when I can't stand crowds and the view is better from across the river in the park anyway!! 😁🎆🎇
Depression is part of the PD, and vice versa! But also a side effect of PD meds! Also paranoia and obsessive behaviours! Gawd help us! PD may even be the result of years of antidepressants - or just that those prone to depression also likely to have PD?? Who knows?
He has agreed to seek help. However, last time he saw a councellor (himself divorced!) it nearly derailed our marriage - that's where everything being my fault seems to have come from!! Possibly because a lot of his problems can be traced back to a manic depressive, very domineering, emotionally blackmailing mother, so by extension, as he has no other close female relatives,....me! (Did I mention I didn't get on well with MIL? :P)
Just talking - and shedding a few tears - has helped, for now at least.
I've just read your post and gone from horror to laughter in seconds. Please take Hump and Dink with you. Of course they can swim, this is Benchland, and just think of the headlines!!
More seriously, that note must have been an awful shock for you. Glad that you have forced him to open up and that things are ok again. Just a thought but maybe the PD is making his depression worse (sure you've thought of that but......?). No wonder you didn't feel like being funny. Could you suggest counselling for him? Dodgy area I know.
I could write a book about difficult OH's. I had one too.
It's officially cold, today I went out and put on the winter coat. Bought in last year's winter sale when I had lost all that weight and it was loose. A little more snug now but still ok. As Tesco have discontinued the pizza that I was addicted to, hopefully it will last out this winter. Other winter coat still far too big.
Talking of clothes, I had a letter inviting me to make an appt. for a smear test, which I've done As usual instructions say to wear separates preferably a skirt. So I've looked in my wardrobe for a skirt, there's only one........ which I wore to the last smear test five years ago and it's a size 16. I'm a size 12 now so I shall be hitting the Charity shops next week for a cheap skirt that I will wear only once.
OK. Normal services resumed. Forced OH to talk about what's ACTUALLY bothering him and reminded him that if he takes it out on me and/or pushes me away I can't help him! (Got home from swimming to a note saying we needed to talk about a separation! 😞 - hence my inability to be funny!)
Having spent 2 days oscillating between worrying about the practicalities of a separation, and how he'll cope as his PD gets worse, and thinking positive thoughts about what I'd enjoy about living on my own, I think we're OK again. At least for a while. Until the next time.
At swimming, I was the last one in the pool for the last 10 minutes - well, less than that actually, because I felt so self-conscious swimming up and down with the lifesaver watching just me. It crossed my mind that really swimming in Loch Ness, especially at this time of year, would be a similarly lonely experience. Then I thought I could take the camels for company (can camels swim?). The realisation that a camel, complete with long neck and humps, partially submerged, would look EXACTLY like the Loch Ness Monster made me laugh out loud and nearly drown myself. Not a good idea when the lifesaver has only me to watch! I'm sure he thought I was having some sort of breakdown. I thought I'd better get out, after only 65 lengths, before he pushed the drowning alarm to summon help (and a straight jacket?! :D)
Icy wind here today. Autumn has definitely arrived!!
FF does not love glitter! FF is just not as bothered about glitter as she used to be.
It's the weekend, I'm going to enjoy myself>
aaaah JCJ, hard to relate funny stories when all around you is not too good, keep your chin up, big, big hugs.
FF loves glitter hahaha!!!
Went into town to pick up a couple of things, because I have been reasonably quiet this week, feet and ankles haven't been too bad, dreary me.......................am in agony..............roll on next Fri, will need a double, no treble dose this time.
Halo still on, passed a shop that sells the most magnificent choc doughnuts, turned quickly in opposite direction, am sooooooooooo good haha!! xx
Spoke too soon about OH!
I did have some amusing things to say about my Nesswim but don't feel like being amusing at the moment. Sorry.
It was a nice day here until about 3pm when it started to rain and got so dark that I had to put lights on. WHAT? Lights on in the house before I go to school? In November? Never been done before.
School? Even more glitter today, Hoovered up what I could but just no longered bothered by it.
Healthy eating? Well.... I try, I succeed, I fail, I'm just about in the middle. No halo for me!
Glad things are better JCJ!
That's odd brother apologising but OH not??? In the end no one does..............
Ali you have my sympathy with headaches, found out from a friend that oranges cause migraines/headaches, do you eat or drink a lot of oranges? If so stop!
Pitch black outside tonight and rained most of the day, heating on and about to munch healthy tea, I also have a halo hahaha!
Loch Ness tonight, brrrrrrrrrrr, wrap up well xx
Make sure you're drinking enough, Ali, (or put more water with it? 😋 Headaches are often a sign of dehydration - and it's always good to have an excuse for a mugatea?
OH has snapped out of his snottathon - until the next time. But he had the nerve to tell me that he's asked his brother to ring me to apologise for the way he treated me that time he came to stay - the year before last? Maybe even longer ago!! He was supposed to phone at 7:30 tonight. He didn't. I was relieved. Don't know what I'd say to him and there's no point in an apology someone else has made him give! By the way, no mention of an apology for the way OH behaved at the weekend. I held my tongue (and privately polished my halo!)
I'm back on the eating carefully bench too! My stomach gave me gyp all weekend - similar to pre-gallstone op but without the accompanying severe pain or nausea. I don't know if it was something I ate, but I had had rather more fatty foods over the holiday, so I'm going to be careful about my fat intake for the next few days/weeks and hope it settles down.
Came upstairs to watch my recorded TV and remembered GB Bake Off has finished. Suffering withdrawal! 😞
I am also attempting to eat healthily - specifically to not eat so much refined sugar. This is unfortunate because my wonderful son has made me a batch of millionaires flapjacks......flapjack base, squidgy caramel, thick milk chocolate on top. Deeeeeeeeeeeeelicious!!!!!!
And shush, I daren't say this out loud but........ I think my hot flushes are subsiding !!!!!!!! I wore a lightweight jumper with long sleeves for the first time since September 2012 and didn't have to tear it off after five minutes!!!!!
Now, if only the headaches would subside too. I have more days at the mo with one than without 😞
You are an awful girl for that invisible ink FF, hahaha!!
I really cannot decipher what you are saying as noticed you are also coding therefore between coding and invisible ink it is impossible!!
Love the clever workings of your brain though!!
Freezing, brrrrrrrrrrrr cold today, had to put heating on as my hands were sooooooooooo cold.
Healthy eating going well am actually enjoying the food but am missing those snacks, chocolate, caramel blah blah........so am in the shed a lot!
Hope you are ok JCJ, hugs flying your way xx
And why is there so much space left in my post?
DId I have ideas to share? No!
Was I philosophising about things? No!
Are any of my thoughts worth sharing? No!
Hugs from me too JCJ, I know what it's like dealing with a "difficult" OH. I'll just agree with what Katy said, don't think I could have put it better.
Back to school and they are making firework pictures which means ......GLITTER......everywhere! I find that I am quite resigned to it and I will hoover up the worst of it and shift all of it that I can but I'm not so bothered by it as I was.
Yesterday a lovely warm sunny autumnal day. Today a cloudy and cold wintery day. And now needing a torch to get from my car parking space into my house and putting on the lights. Aaaaagh! This is life until February half term.
Am just going to sit in the shed all day then Forgot about calorie free so will just munch and munch and munch!!
Went out for a small walk with GS cause it's such a lovely day, freezing but sunny, am regretting it haha!!
Aaaah JCJ try to not listen too intently, and don't get upset or angry, it's pointless if this is what happens at times, just do lalalalala in your head, and hopefully it will pass quickly!
Perhaps if you agree and say "yes, you are right, I am to blame for everything", where can the conversation go then?? Sending you big hugs xx
It's OK, KTC, you can visit the shed for cake - in Benchland they have 0 calories, remember, and they count towards your 5 a day! 😄
First day back done. 34 more until we break up for the C word. Me? Counting? Why would I do that?
Actually, being at work preferable to being at home at the moment - OH in one of his a**ey moods - he's had many of them over the years - where all his frustrations/disappointments/inadequacies are, of course, all my fault! I think it's only going to get worse with the PD. Not sure I can cope with challenging behaviours at work AND at home! 😞
I know, how bad am I???? hahaha
As I am now on the "healthy" bench no cake for moi.................might sneak over later................no don't do it.........
Glad you had a lovely day FF, sad about the fire.
All quiet today, missing my lunch date boo hoo.
GS was dressed as a spider yesterday so cute, bought a pair of shoes for him so he went off to other Grandparents house with his new shoes. He's had another haircut and is such a boy now, baby no more, GD has sleepover here on Fri so favourite tea in, noodles, this girl could eat them for breakfast!!
About to have a muggacoffee with no obligatory biscuit, mmmmmmmmmmm xx
Driving a broom without a licence? Really Katy? I'm shocked! Thank heavens we got to France and back safely. Good job the broom police were otherwise engaged.
Yay, birthday cake in the shed, coffee and walnut and a few left over fondant fancies . Lovely family get together, lots of gossip exchanged. A conversation about the tragic fire in our City. Although I'm really sad about the loss of the oldest hotel in England, I'm just so thankful that it didn't spread to the medieval buildings nearby, or the Cathedral. When my daughter and I go there, our favourite cafe is just yards away.
Back to school tomorrow, another seven weeks to go! Which brings about the thought that It's sevenish weeks until that time of year that cannot be mentioned until after Bonfire Night.....a frightening thought!
Congrats Dame Grumpy, I'm sure your Oscar is on the way.
Bravo, bravo flowers thrown at your feet, grumpy!
Pssst FF, I have no licence!
Doing a small shop today, groan, decided to do some "healthy" eating, we'll see how long that lasts...............
Am awful, those tasty bits just keep falling magically into my trolley.
The Wedding, what's happening now JCJ?
Is the theme still lime green and orange? xx
Thank you, one and all. ( bows graciously ) . My debut has been brilliant and I look forward to an award in the near future.
PS never again........
Woo hoo Loch Ness!!
It is a "wee" bit chilly up here, so cosy costume needed, thermal, furry, knitted??
Am sure you will be gorgeous regardless.............
If there is a commotion about Nessie each Thurs, we will know the secret, hee hee.
Superly quiet day here, whew xx
OK then. Loch Ness it is! Just logged my first swim (swam 70 lengths on Thursday and only needed 15 (14.2 actually) to reach Calais, so by the wonders of the Internet I can use the remaining 55 to start the Nesswim. It seems I am swimming from the northern end, near Inverness (just to clarify, KTC, as you didn't seem to know where Loch Ness was! :P) down to Fort Augustus. I expect a full welcome committee again when I reach there in about April. Definitely going to need my fleece lined swimsuit for a winter swim in Loch Ness?! I think I'll get a Nessie costume - that'll cause a stir? 😁🐉
Congatulations on your channel swim JCJ. I also think Loch Ness should be your next challenge. It could prove one way or the other whether there is a monster? Are you sure it was a photo, or were Hump and Dink shadowing you? Be very careful.
Mine was the big service on the car so that explains the difference in price.
Katy - your broom driving was a bit erratic.....did you not see that Boeing 747 that we nearly collided with? I shut my eyes and hoped for the best, never been more glad to arrive back home. Perhaps a bit more practise before Halloween?
Wish I lived nearer, KTC, I'd come to you and bring lunch so you didn't have to miss out! 😞
I just had a real Benchland moment in Sainsbury's (other supermarkets are, of course, available!): I always use the backs/insides of old greetings cards as shopping lists, and any other handy bit of card. Today, as I was going around the store, consulting my list, I was getting some peculiar looks - so I stopped muttering to myself about my purchase choices - but I was still getting odd glances.
It was only at the checkout that I spotted what was on the back of my list: I had printed off some photos, taken at MMU, for FF for MMU4. The one of Grumpy holding the camels in front of Eric (that sounds like an elaborate code?? :P) had printed wrong, cutting off Eric's head, but rather than throw it away, I just shoved it in the shopping list card box and forgot all about it. From the looks on the other shoppers' faces, I might as well have been riding the camels around the store, or at the very least leading them round on leads (reins?) 😂
Many congratulations JCJ, you're a winner, woo hoo, scooby/booby doo!!
Congrats to grumpy too, Dame Mirren???
Would def go for Loch Ness JCJ, monster, camels and of course us, haha, though I may not be able to find you haha!!!
Thank you for your kind words and hugs much needed and appreciated.
Have to go in for another infusion best date at the moment is in 2 weeks time, there are only 4 beds available on a daily basis but they will contact me if there is a cancellation. If I had a motorised wheelchair or scooter I would be in it, can't put into words how ouchy things are...............
Next week was meant to be busy, lunches out etc but have had to cancel all good for the waistline perhaps??.
Away to pop over to the "think positive" bench xx
Oh and fab news about your car xx
Oh Katy, your poor feet! Hope your consultant can sort that out soon. Congratulations JCJ , I've boiled the kettle specially for a proper cuppa to go with the patisserie. Son reckons that yes, the ppppenguin did help. His Gran has knitted him a Pingu in graduation robes and mortar board (to be clear, the penguin is dressed in these items NOT my mil whilst knitting, although its an intriguing image). And Grumpy, congrats on the stage debut!
Ive started the Christmas shopping, have bought my son a shirt from that high street retailer who specialises in marked down labels and has too many xxxxxxxxxs in the name . Anyway , it's a Penguin label shirt, seemed appropriate!
Bonjour tout le monde! Je suis arrive! Ou et mes amis? Ah voila mes amis dans cette broomstick la! Je suis tres tres fatigues parce que j'ai swam 22 miles (tais- tois - ne pas parler that it took moi 23 swims et a total of just over 20 hours to do it!)
Passez moi beaucoup de croissants et un enormous tasse de te, j'ai earned it!
What shall I do for my next challenge? Swim back to Dover? Swim Loch Ness - also 22 miles. Loch Lomond - 24 miles, Loch Fine 25 miles, Guernsey coastline 30 miles or Jersey coastline 45 miles. Which do you fancy?
My car service was the 'small' one as I had the 'big' one last year along with cam belt.
More hugs from me Katy, Hope appt. with consultant comes soon and that there is an easy solution for your feet.
YAY for your car JCJ. If I add my car service and MOT together I paid more than that, did you get a bargain or was I ripped off? Did you find anything in the charity shops?
Katy and I on broomstick to Calais, you have your car back, no excuses, we are waiting. Let the celebrations begin. But we won't mind a weeks holiday in France if you don't make it today!
Congrats to Ali's son on both results.
I have now made my acting debut!!!!!
It's very strange how the audience laugh in all the wrong places....
I'll be exhausted come Saturday.
Oh, hugs, Katy, it must be miserable to be in pain all the time. I hope the consultant can do something to help you ASAP.
Got phonecall from garage at 11:30, just as I was wondering which café to go in for another hour. Panicked. Expected: "your car has catastrophically failed it's MOT and will cost a million pounds to fix," but got: "your car is ready for collection," could have knocked me down with a feather (ok, a steel plated one!) so it "only" costing £164 for service & MOT seemed like an utter bargain (especially when combined with 1 1/2 hours now not needing to waste time and money in various shops/cafés?!)
Called in at garage that sells plants on way home and got my winter pansies and primula for my tubs - another half-term job - will get them in as soon as I finish this coffee and sit down...... promise! 😛
Well done Ali's son, woo hoo!
Oxtail soup? mmmmm have eaten it once in around 20 years? Do I like it? It's ok haha!!
Monkey in the tree?? In Calais? Will camels be there too??
Am in terrible trouble with feet, so ouchy, finally conceded and went to docs yesterday, they will not touch me, so am waiting for nurse to phone, she's just phoned!!
Will contact consultant and get back to me, woo hoo!!
Finding it very hard xx
Bleurgh, not a fan of oxtail soup I'm afraid but I do sympathise with the food mess everywhere scenario!
Yes, son has done his degree resit and got his 2:1 so he's happy. Driving lesson tomorrow. Applying for jobs when nagged to by his cruel mother.......