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Welcome to Benchland, Bee. You've found a sanctuary where you will be supported by people who "get it" (because they've got it/had it!!) and who won't judge you or make comparisons. Ask anyone who thinks you took too long off work how they'd feel to be told they had cancer and have to lose part of their body!! 
Kay, shove up on the soggy bench, I'm coming to join you with tea, cake and hugs, although I won't be partaking of the former two. I couldn't eat cake, not even virtual cake, as I've been sent home from work. Apparently, I look as dreadful as I feel! 
I was awake all night with trapped wind/pains in stomach/chest. I've felt so sick all morning at work, and haven't dared eat or drink anything. I'm really getting worried now as this is the fourth time I've had an upset stomach since August! 😞 Of course, I can't stop myself worrying about secondaries, even though my sister and YD keep reminding me I wouldn't be getting better in between: it would be continuous.
Could it be hormonal? 3-monthly Zoladex injections finished in May and would have worn off by August. "Sickness" happened every month since?! Coincidence? No other Premenopause symptoms! 
Hello Bee, am so glad this thread was helpful to you
!
You have def not had a "pretend cancer", good grief...........so never, ever feel guilty!
It's such early days for you and you are still having a hard time, do NOT throw guilt on top of that.
This is perhaps a time where you can be a little selfish and do what you want to do instead of what you are expected to do??
We have a lake here in Benchland, stand at the end of the jetty and throw that guilt away, just watch out for the alligators!!
And Bee.........thank you xx
Katytc i just wanted to say thank you!!!
Well said
I had a core biopsy in May 2014 and was told i had DCIS and that i would need a WLE, which was booked for the following Thursday, at this point I was made to feel i had a "pretend cancer" by some people. I then had my WLE in June 2014, had to wait 3 weeks for the results, to be told i had 60mm of DCIS and 19mm of invasive ductal carcinoma. I was then booked in for the following Thursday to have a sentinel node biopsy, after another long 3 weeks of waiting, i finally got good news to say my nodes were clear. But now this "pretend cancer" was causing me loads of pain and discomfort from cording and numbness under my armpit and around my back, not to mention the seroma. When i received the results from the consultant about the nodes and the previous WLE, he gave me some options. I could possibly have radiotherapy, but because my cancer didn't show up on a mamagram, and it grew quite quickly, he thought the best option (but no pressure was put on me) would be to have a mastectomy. He said i could have radiotherapy, but i would probably be sitting infront of him again in 2-3years. I didn't want to go through that again, so i had my mastectomy the 16th October 2014. I had and expander fitted the same time and have had it filled up twice now. I still have lots of swelling and still have seroma. I took 6 weeks off work which was probably too long in some peoples eyes, but i had the drain attached for 2 1/2 weeks. I still have it in my head that it was a "pretend cancer" because that is how some people made me feel. So i wanted to thank you for your posting. That really helped me. xxx
Hope you are better today JCJ, just too many bugs doing the rounds!
Oh golly gosh it's freezing here, been to the chippie, have the heating on so am cosy, early night methinks!
YD said to me how many of the cakes have you eaten, Mum???
I said 5!!
Well, I DO like them haha!! xx
Coconut, yum yum, love coconut. Back when I was a kid (many moons ago!) Mother used to make coconut pyramids - gorgeous. I have lost her recipe and nothing I've tried comes close, Hey ho.
Can't believe that your new kitchen is going to cost half what you paid for the whole house JCJ. It will be well worth it when it's finished except that everytime you want to put milk in your tea you'll be opening the oven:
No decorations up here yet. I have bought some new ones this year so I will put them up, unlike last year when I just didn't bother. I was very bah humbug last year but I think I'm a little more Christmassy this time.
It's a bit (a lot) chilly down here and right at this moment I can hear the hail on my conservatory roof. It's deafening! Hope it will be better tomorrow as I have to go out to return items bought by internet shopping. I know they were cheap but cheap and cheerful is acceptable, cheap and nasty is not!
Hope your Fair goes well and you sell lots of knitties!
Went along early to the PO this morning and guess what?? NO queue, was soooooooo excited that I almost forgot why I was there tee hee.
Went to buy the coconut cakes yesterday and they were no where to be found grrrrrrrrrr, as I was passing the local A*** on my way back from PO I found them, woo hoo and there are 10 in a pack!!! Woo hoo again, ahhhhhhhh the simple things xx
Such a lot of pennies but all the upheaval will be worth it! And Jan is such a boring month......
Why are you not going to your night out?
We put our tree up early last year cause we bought a new one, so we were excited, haha!
Hope ASBO boy is not using your tree grumpy???
Very hard frost this morning but it brings the sunshine, its very chilly here.
YD left at 5 this morning and ED is still snotty despite having the flu jab. Have not had mine yet this year another thing I must do?????? Well when I feel like it haha xx
GRRrr! Stop it with this excessive Christmassyness! 🙂 I have no tree up yet. it goes up on or around the 11th and stays up until 6th Jan - 2 weeks before and 2 weeks after the big day! This year it will go up on 12th as OH will be out that evening (he's one of the world's biggest humbu**ers!) and I'm NOT going to my staff do that night, so it'll be nice to be Christmassy at home instead. I did put up a tree in a classroom at school yesterday, but that has to come down before we break up on 19th, so that doesn't really count!
27 of the 40 Christmas cards made, but none written yet. Most presents bought but unwrapped - I'll save that little task until after we finish at school as I'll have nearly a week.
I've been reeling on the HOW MUCH???? bench that FF constructed a while ago. On Sunday we finalised our kitchen plans and paid the deposit. Fitters arrive on 14th Jan to rip out the old kitchen and tiles and repair the ceiling/walls. We have been told to expect the whole job to take 10 days to 2 weeks as we need to move the gas supply, the water supply (only logical layout, apparently means moving the sink a couple of foot to the left and swapping the (new) cooker and (existing) fridge with each other on opposite sides of the room!) and have new electrics throughout (the kitchen hopefully, not the rest of the house!) The total price comes to exactly half what we paid for the WHOLE HOUSE 31 years ago, and that doesn't include the electrician, tiles or flooring!!!
The kitchen company is organising the electrician for us, but as he is not VAT registered, we have been advised to pay him direct so we wont have to pay any VAT. If we go to a well known tile shop (the one at the TOPP of the hill!?) just opposite the kitchen shop, with our plan from SS Kitchens, we will get a 10% discount on flooring and tiles and one of the kitchen fitters will fit these for us at 'mates rates', 'privately', at the weekend. Keeping it all under one roof, as it were, SHOULD mean it all goes smoothly from initial destruction to completion!
I rang the ISA company yesterday to get them to cash in our Stocks & shares ISA to pay for it all. Scary times. I've not spent that much money since we bought the house!!
I hope it will be wonderful when it's done. It had better be!! 
My sister had another trip to the hospital in Birmingham (she lives in Leominster!) about her BM transplant. It seems they are still running compatability tests on our brother, so it's not certain he's an exact match yet, and even if he is, it isn't going to happen before Christmas now. Her next appointment is January 6th! She's getting a bit fed up now and thinks the hospital are 'fa**ying around'. They shouldn't have given her the suggestion that it might be over Christmas...... it just makes the waiting worse!
No tree up yet, cards written, presents sorted!
One of those mornings where I seem to have done loads but got no where???
We have sunshine here, first time in a long while cause it's been grey, grey, grey..............
ED off work today stinking cold, she must feel bad cause she is never off, YD off to London tomorrow, flying visit, she just phoned and told me that she had won £50, she's a lucky monkey!
Planning on a quiet day, fingers crossed xx
Oh FF that doesn't sound good!
Hope you feel better soon and take care shopping.
grumpy there is a threading device that is very cheap on Futon Land near the bay, not sure if it works was going to order one forgot all about it.......................so plucking for me, have got soooooooooooo many of those blonde peachy hairs am scared to do anything about them, so just pluck out the dark ones.
JCJ enjoy your bake, any news about you sister?
HOOVERED today, woo hoo and sorted pressies, realised that I have gone a bit mad with my Mum's gifts, that's what happens when you remember NOTHING!
Migraines back had two peaceful days, grrrrrrrrrrr, have tabs that work well but hate relying on them and taking so many sooooooooooo will have to go to docs, grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr xx
Excellent that you have picked kitchen etc whew!!
Lots of excitement!
Am also on the "excited" bench, have just been up to hospital with ED, she was having bloods taken, being measured and her anti jab, ouchy!
But the lovely part was hearing heartbeat, he's lying hammock position, wonderful xx
Ooooooooooh soooooooooo exciting JCJ!
In my old house we had a kitchen fitted in Dec didn't take long and we were ready for Xmas which was fab the only drawback I can remember was the front door being constantly open and we were freezing, am sure it was only 2 days and we had a large kitchen.
All the best with choosing, have fun. xx
Great news about the migraines going, Katy! 😄
I'm on the choosing kitchens bench. YD dragged us to the kitchen fitter's showroom yesterday and they're coming to measure up tomorrow! I've been meaning to have a new kitchen for, literally, YEARS, but keep putting it off because I can't face the hassle/stress of spending that much money and worrying about getting it right. Sooo many decisions to make and I'm c**p at making decisions. Years of savings beign spent here! 
Definitely don't want to have the upheaval before Christmas, so we might book in the actual fitting for February half term. That'll give me time to sort everything.
Oooooooooh JCJ they look yummy!!
Believe it or not migraines have calmed down (touching wood as I say this) woo hoo!!
No don't think it's anything to do with the lido, see pain man in Jan and will ask him then, am sure it's the nerve damage doing things to my brain haha!!
Just been for two hot chocolates, slurpy, slurp. It's blinkin' cold outside brrrrrrrrrrrrrr xx
OR off your trolley hee hee!!
Will there be some pies and cream in the shed tomorrow??
Poor ASBO boy, let's hope all the meds and baths work, grumpy.
Looks like it's the Travelodge!
Maybe down earlier, as well, next year cause my GD is fascinated about where her Nannie disappears to soooooooooo have promised to take her to see Eric, visit Rita's etc, who would have thought I'd be a regular??? seemingly children's park etc..................hinted to her today and her eyes lit up with excitement, love the joy in children's faces.
The fair was fun, large queues but some very nice stuff, will be fabulous next year for Xmas Presents.
And we didn't come home with another baby JCJ, naughty you!!!
Have been feeling rotten recently, migraine after migraine, daily start around one hour after I wake up and had a feeling I was going to faint this morning so had time to sit down. Did not keel over but was a lovely shade of white. I think it's all to do with nerve damage so will have to get to docs. Afraid I don't have much faith in them at the moment but can't leave it for much longer. xx
Isn't it amazing how tasty things just happen to fall into your basket??!
Quiet today, doing lots and lots of washing, tumble drying and a jigsaw, have turned compulsive re jigsaws........
Am back on the "hairy face" bench! Can't believe how long some of the hairs are, they are blonde which is fortunate but they are at least 1 inch long grrrrrrrrrrrrrrr, ah well only another 7 years to go..............xx
Oh no poor baldy ASBO boy.
Gosh Kay you have been busy!
JCJ, lovely news about everyone coming for Xmas!
Have been invited out for two Xmas Dinners, one at lunchtime and the other teatime so quite excited!!
Real Xmas Dinner is at my house, have ordered main ingredients, no turkey in this house cause no one likes it haha! So we are having lamb and beef yum................xx
Your trip sounds fab FF and how lovely that "chivalry" is not dead! Sometimes you forget that there are kind people.................
Is your back behaving better now?
TV fully restored as of yesterday, woo hoo, half of my channels have been missing for almost two weeks, so poor GD was searching for a channel that would work, she just decided to draw pictures instead. She used the rhinestones that were left over from MMU2 so have two new pictures adorning my wall.
Hope you are ok JCJ??? Still laughing, how sad am I? Keep thinking of you running around as in The Benny Hill show, gosh am really showing my age now!
Rained sooooooooooooo heavily yesterday so will soon pop into town before the crowds really start, why do I always forget something??? Have post its in all my pockets and still forget..................who has all the marbles? xx
