Throw your guilt in the lake T4T. The alligators will fatten themselves up on it and we will enjoy delicious alliburgers! Definitely NO SWIMMING in this lake though. <<hugs>>
They say things come in threes.
(Takes deep breath) as well as my friend who died from bone secondaries, my friends mum died at 91, and another friend died after a massive stroke leaving his wife who had brain surgery 2 years ago and struggles a bit with life. What a f##king AWFUL week....
I have a lot to be Thankful for.
Now I've got the bad news out of the way, I must get chariot race sorted.
Got some mad twinkly leggings to wear with black bra festooned with tinsel and seqins, tiara and body makeup with GLITTER.
No suggestions as yet for host/starter.......
Joey still wants a studded leather jacket, and Meg INSISTING on pearls and tiara.
Norcambe doesn't know what will hit it!!!!
Have we chosen a date????
So sorry to hear your results were mixed today T4 T , and that your margins under your arm weren't good enough .
I can't believe that you were misdiagnosed so badly and had to wait so long for treatment , no wonder you need the F**king Furious bench !!!
Although I think mine was growing away for a long while disguised as lymphoedema , from bruise appearing to diagnosis was only 4 months . I thought that was bad enough . As mine was caused by my rads treatment for breast cancer , will you shift up a bit so I can join you on said bench !!! LOL .
I too had a radical mx in Jan 2015 and my tumour was 30 cm !! I kid you not , basically all my chest !! They said they had clear margins but by April I had recurrence in my scar and needed 2WLE to get clear margins again !!
I couldn't have radiotherapy as my AS was secondary ,radiation induced and so I couldn't have any more radiation on that side of my body due to damage to heart and lungs etc.
Hope the MDT comes up with a good plan for you next week . Please do keep in touch and let me know how it goes .
I tried to pm you , but it won't send .
Hugs , Jill xxxx
Hello all!! Budge up on the gin bench Tattie, sorry you're having such a rough time of it. Have you met my camels????? (now there's a conversational opener you don't hear every day)
Oooh I'm in one of JCJ 's verses (or should we call them tittyditties?:) ) so happy 🙂
So , Anastrozole and joint pain. Ouchy hip joints. Huh!
Hugs to Grumpy and anyone else who needs one. Can I have a mince pie please?? X
A thought re Chariot Race. Please could we combine it with the Christmas supermarket food shop? It would be such fun, we could put tinsel on the trollies and Hump and Dink could clear us a path to the sprouts and parsnips.... 😄
Lavendersblue and tat4tit (love that name) welcome to Benchland.. Sounds as if you have both had a raw deal.
Ali, are you completely bonkers? Chariot race combined with Christmas food shopping? Can you imagine the chaos and destruction? With Hump and Dink too? Actually , it might be fun but it would make the national news Am I ready for that sort of notoriety?
Talking of Xmas food shopping, I am responsible (no, I'm not, no way am I a responsible adult) for buying the meat for Xmas dinner. Went to Tesco today (other supermarkets etc.....) for a turkey crown. They didn't have one, I enquired as to when their next delivery would be and was told that they wouldn't be getting any more. WHAT?? Sitting firmly on the "I don't believe it" (said in Victor Meldrew's voice) bench. Not everyone shops early for Xmas and there's still 10 days to go!!
Perhaps all their deliveries next week will be Easter eggs?
Chariot race date? I was going to suggest Xmas Eve but maybe that's a bit too late for Xmas shopping (especially if you want a turkey crown!!) . The shortest day? Now called the winter solstice. I've always believed it to be the 21st but now I've googled it it could be the 22nd. It's either UTC on the 22nd or EST on the 21st and I'm completely confused. I'm just going with the 21st as I've always thought. So......next Monday??
Gives us a few days to nurse the bruises before Xmas
I read your thread on the Radiotherapy board, Jill, and promptly ran over to the Sad and Terrified bench! You've been through such an ordeal with all the surgery and reccurrences in your scar and other breast. How have you kept sane? I think I'd be dribbling in a corner after all that!
There's loads of room on the F**king Furious bench - I'm guessing it was designed as an extra large bench because of the sheer demand for it 🙂 Maybe we should order a Rare Cancers bench too. Not to sit on, but to smash to smithereens when the F**king Furious bench doesn't quite hit the spot 😉
I do hope you have a special Christmas this year - you certainly deserve it 🙂 xxx
Hi Ali. I'm guessing Hump and Dink are your camels? And you're right, it's been AT LEAST a week since anyone opened a conversation like that 😉 Mince pie and gin just to your right x
I love the idea of a Chariot race around Tesco. I think Christmas Eve would be perfect, almost a public service to distract and entertain all the stressed shoppers? I know someone who works at my local Tesco, so I might have to leave the area afterwards, but hey, it'll be worth it!
Foxy, I was once at a farm shop collecting my turkey just before Christmas. An older chap in front of me was creating merry hell with the cashiers because his turkey crown didn't have any legs... "what will me mam do without a drumstick on Christmas day?" kind of ranting. The queue and all the cashiers were women and there were many knowing looks being exchanged and quite a lot of tittering happening, poor bloke 😉
On the kn***ered bench having just got back from doing the Christmas food shop.Not at Tesco, but the one beginning with an S. Why did no one tell me that I could have had Hump & Dink (yes, T4T, they are camels - see my photo album for one of Dink in her pink jumper!) "help" me.
Don't know what possessed me to do the food shop on the same day as the Christmas lunch at school, but it's done now. Anything I've not got, apart from Turkey, fresh fruit & veg and cream, which I will get from farm shop on 23rd, we can do without. 3 more get ups until THE BIG SLEEP! 🙂
I hope the glitter fest has calmed down at your school, FF? (though I suspect not! :(). 2 weeks ago, we had an enterprise day where the whole school worked in their houses to make cakes, biscuits, tree decorations and gift tags. Each house of 30+ children aged 4 to 11, had to make all the items, so every classroom had glue, glitter, AND cooking debris all over them. I felt so sorry for the cleaners, and most of the carpets still sparkle slightly!!
Day 15 Carol contribution: verse 2 of Once in seaside Norecambe city
Grumpy came down the M6 from heaven,
With her dogs, the best of all
But their chariot was not stable,
They were destined for a fall
On the floor, they fell so slowly
Dented tiara and knee highs holey.
21st seems a good day for THE race. We can celebrate the fact that the days will start to lengthen again! 🙂
Am well up for chariot race through supermarket as I only need a LETTUCE, hahaha!!!
Advantage or what???
FF, will be ages looking for her crown..............
Had hair chopped yesterday as seemed to be resembling a bowl, my own fault as I told hairdresser to shorten the sides, when it started to grow, ended up being not a pretty sight!
GS was superly grumpy yesterday, well grizzly.
Was almost late for my appt so had to run, yes, run down the road super, duper practise for race, because I have all the new additions managed it in record time.
21st is fine for me!!
Aaah grumpy, sad times.
tat, fingers crossed for you.
Ali, you having Hump & Dink, Xmas Day??
Realised yesterday have not had any results from mammo, seeing as it was 2 months ago I assume I'm NORMAL??
Way to chase up lynn clinic xx
Our hot water system decided to throw a hissy and flooded the garage last night, so we have no running water at all! Apart from a quick trip to the gym to shower this morning I've waited in for the plumber all day, occupying myself by visiting most of the benches 😞 I found a Give Me A Bl@@dy Break bench which hit the spot for a while! The plumber is supposed to be coming to do a quick fix so we at least have cold running water until the part arrives and can be fitted to reinstate the hot water, but it's 4.30pm and I'm on the worried bench....
Anyway, I think my visit to the Give Me A Bl@@dy Break bench must have been noted because my mum just rang to say they'd had a good offer for their house. It's wonderful news as they can downsize and spend more time doing what they want to do rather than enslaved to a big house and gardens 🙂 And, to add to the 'good things' pot, I am picking my son up from uni tomorrow morning 🙂
How has everyone else's day been? An American friend of mine calls Wednesday 'hump day' (how apt for this thread!) so it's officially nearly the weekend now 😉
Had *that* class again this afternoon and I actually feel I'm starting to win them round. I've allowed them to earn whole class reward minutes every time they're all doing the right thing. They got to cash in 43 minutes this afternoon on activities of their choosing (within reason!). It started off badly with a couple of the boys throwing pens again but some of the ones who usually join in were picking them up and putting them away!! I think they're realising that actually it's pretty tiresome!! Small steps, but I feel I'm getting there (without any sensible strategies from her in charge!!) No doubt it'll be back to square 1 after 2 weeks holiday?! 😞
Day 16: The next verse of OISNC
For she is our Southern Ferret
Day by day, more Foxy she grew;
She was racing like a demon
Tiaras and smiles, as along she flew
And the glitter makes her mad,
Disinfectant makes her glad.
Forgot to say: Hope your plumber gets your water sorted quickly, T4T,
and KTC, 2 months without getting your mammo results is probably a good sign - maybe worth checking though? Perhaps they just couldn't bring themselves to put in writing that you are NORMAL?? *sniggers*
I've been immortalised in song! YAY! Absolutely howled with laughter at that JCJ. Brilliant! No, glitter fest has not died down, all carpets, lino and wooden floors are sparkly and I no longer care.
Katy, I have (thanks to daughter's connections) found my turkey crown for Xmas dinner at wholesale price! Result! We'll all eat and I've saved money. Legs are not an issue in my family T4T.
Interesting journey home from work tonight. Drove up the hill out of the village and straight into thick fog! Remember I'm in country lanes here, no lighting and a lot of the way single track with passing places. It's actually easier in the dark as you can see headlights coming towards you. Top speed tonight was 15mph following the left hand grass verge. Although I know that way like the back of my hand, so easy to get disorientated. Once I started down the hill into town it cleared and was fine.
I'm not ready for Christmas, I'm starting to panic, grandchildren sorted, SIL and DIL sorted but what about daughter and son? The most important people? No ideas, no clues, time running out, what am I going to do?
FF will be wearing a crown for the chariot race instead of a tiara.... A Turkey crown. Hehehe
I've contacted Nigella, Delia, Jamie and a bunch of other TV chefs and told them to all include lettuce in ALL their recipes so the shops sell out. That should nobble KTC. Mwahaha!
Yes we will come down the M6 as all other roads are uncertain as yet.
Joey doesn't think knee highs will go with his biker jacket, and Meg has gone all drama queen and point blank refuses to wear ANYTHING with holes......
Right - chariot race on the 21st, incorporating the Christmas food shop with Hump and Dink helping..
I think it's the maddest thing we've ever done. God help us all.
So. Tired. One. More. Get. Up. I. Can. Do. This!
Behind window 17: last verse of OISNC ( though I feel bad for leaving out so many contributors to Benchland, and the newcomers, but OIRDC only has these verses for me to "adapt"!! Maybe I'll add some more if I run out of ideas in the next 8 days! :))
And our eyes at last shall see her,
Charging along, across the sand
For that one so dear and gentle,
Is our founder of Benchland:
And she leads her Benchies on,
To the place where guilt is gone.
Aaah JCJ that's lovely, was going to say you were a bit of a "mean" girl yesterday will change it to "naughty", lettuce and normal?????
Believe it or not I received my letter today, it didn't say I was normal??? Have you been having words with them JCJ? but satisfactory will do nicely, thank you!
Also found out I hadn't been referred for lynn appt so after numerous phonecalls to different city, it's arranged, woo hoo will receive confirmation in post fingers crossed.
Feel as though my arm and hand are being strangled at the moment and if I don't wear sleeve and gauntlet arm weighs a ton!
AND my chariot is squeaking, more sabotage methinks but I have sprayed it with **40 sooooooooooooo should be fine for 21st...
Have decided to wear a Xmas Tree on my head, tiara on top because FF has a crown and so does JCJ xx
Only teasing KTC, not really being mean. And it's your fault I don't feel guilty about it!!! *cheeky grin*
Just been for my last swim of 2015! Pool won't be open on the next 2 Thursdays!! Good training session ready for Monday!
On the First day of Treatment my Breast Cancer gave to me the Breast Cancer Care Forum
On the Second day of treatment my BC gave to me: 2 nasty scars and the BCC Forum
To be continued.....
Home. Term finished. On the CBA (literally, CAN'T be ....) bench for the foreseeable future!!
Have been keeping the "CBA" bench warm for you.
Now, JCJ you don't feel a teeny, weeny, itsy, bitsy, tiny, whiny little bit guilty????? hahahaha!
FF, cannot think how to attach, will ponder a while longer..............
Today was awful, booked a taxi to take me to GD's school, the traffic was horrendous and we were stuck PANIC, so managed to get a hold of ED who told school I would be 10 mins late, whew!!
Then as we were coming down the road she said she was not feeling well, had a really sore head, so had to stop off to buy some medicine for her. She cosied down on sofa and fell fast asleep.
After ED and GD left went into town, coming home the torrential rain started, grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr! Sooooooooooo drenched, grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!
Takeaway tonight and the "CBA" bench for moi xx
Congratulations to everyone who made it to the end of term 🙂 Sorry your granddaughter is ill, Katyc - half the people I know are either hugging a sick bucket or have a raging cold 😞
Is there a Smug bench? I have been feeling pretty good physically and returned to the gym today for a Zumba class with my daughter. The instructor is really good, chooses great music and I felt NORMAL!! I know that statement wouldn't hold up in a court of law - too many people know the truth - but it was great to reclaim a little of my life and feel in control of how I spend my time 🙂
Yes Tat, there is a Smug bench. It sounds like you are on the way to finding your way back to yourself - albeit a slightly different version of yourself! Congratulations! 🙂
I think the local police have got wind of our chariot supermarket race and/or singing, because our village park carpark has 4 police vans in it tonight and police cones with blue flashing lights on cordoning off the entrance. There are signs saying "crime prevention check". OK. OK. OK. I promise I won't sing.
Yay, hairpins are the way to go! Fairy lights are attached sucessfully. You'll all be sooooooo jealous.
Lost the will to live at school tonight......they had a film, actually they had a chioce of two films in different classrooms, and popcorn. POPCORN all over the floor,and the desks. Did they have a popcorn fight? What on earth were they doing? They can't have been eating it, the floors were covered in it!
As I have 6 holiday days left this year, I am taking 3 of them now so have only 3 hours to work over Christmas, so Monday will sort that out and I shall then be off until 4th January. Oh joy!
If the police are in your neck of the woods JCJ, then they're not in Norecambe interferring with our chariot race.
Who asked if I have the camels over Christmas? No, I have my mother in law. She is not one of life's cheery people, her glass isn't half empty so much as filled with the wrong stuff, lukewarm and smashed on the floor staining the carpet. Ah well.
Have collected son from uni, lovely to have an untidy house again and stuff abandoned everywhere 🙂 and I've nearly finished at work for the break - which of course means I can then apply myself to washing ironing cooking cleaning baking shopping wrapping....phew....
Im pleased to see the 'almost felt normal for a while' bench is back in use, I have a fabulous yoga teacher who tailored her classes to include something I'd be able to do when I was on treatment, it really helps doesn't it if you can do something, even if only briefly 🙂
Loving The Twelve Days of Treatment, can I request (for chemo ladies, and of course chemo gents) "no nasal hair".... Oooh that was horrible!
Christmas tree died today, all its little lights went out!!!!!! Thought of asking plumber ( mending screaming shower) if he could sort it but decided that would be pushing my luck! So went to the garden centre for tree, lights and a few extra baubles - £70 ouch. Found message on phone to say the part for the shower will be £170!!!!! Oh pooh!!! What is it about BC and plumbers?????? There must be a causal link somewhere......
Made the Reindeer Food for NDs bairns to sprinkle in the garden so the Reindeer know which house to come to with the pressies, equal parts of porridge oats and edible glitter which gets eaten by the birds but I don't tell the bairns that bit.
New tree looks lovely, all silver and white baubles, so all I need to do now is make sure I've got enough clean sheets for the back to back visitors, but I do NOT have to worry about meals cos they all bring stuff or pay for meals out. How good is that?!?
Our new heating controller was fitted yesterday, by a friend. He paid £46 for the piece of kit and was only going to charge us that, as it only took 5 minutes to fit it, so I rounded it up to £50! Bargain for us, and he made £4 for 5 mins work (the trip to the shop to get the part included something he wanted anyway) so we're all happy!! Let's hope it's fixed the problem and the heating will stop playing silly b........ .
CBA bench for me today, though I may stagger out to deliver neighbours' cards, and I should marzipan the cake.
Behind window number 19:
On the third day of treatment my BC gave to me: 3 blue tittoos,
2 nasty scars, and the BCC Forum
On the fourth day of treatment my BC gave to me: 4 weeks of rads, 3 blue tittoos, 2 nasty scars and the BCC Forum.
On the fifth day of treatment my BC gave to me: FIVE YEARS ON MEDS (actually 10 now, but I didn't know it then and 5 fits better with the song!!)
4 weeks of rads,
3 blue tittoos,
2 nasty scars
and the BCC Forum
On the sixth day of treatment my BC gave to me 6 fleeces flayling,
FIVE YEARS ON MEDS,
4 weeks of rads,
3 blue tittoos,
2 nasty scars
and the BCC Forum.
My heating is still playing silly b........but it works ok in the evenings when I need it, so it could be worse. Plumber tried last week to fit a new a controller but it wouldn't "talk" to the boiler and he said he'd come back this week. He's forgotten so I'll remind him in the morning!
Daughter has finally got her woodburner /chimney sorted and it is now so warm that they are opening windows! It's SOOOooooooo much nicer at her house now that cold/damp feeling has gone. As the woodburner also heats the water there will be no more problems with the immersion heater either. Result, I'm so pleased they managed to get it done before Xmas.
Food shopping tomorrow (must write a list) not going anywhere near a supermarket after that. Don't really need very much as other people will be feeding me over Xmas and New Year. Just a few essentials...you know.....wine, chocolate, baileys etc.
todays the day!!! woohoo!!
What time are we starting??
Keeping Xmas tree on head all day so I'm used to extra weight, change into my costume just before race.....room booked at Madlands, be down after breakfast xx
Is it today? What time? She says hastily attaching knitted items to a mobility scooter (haha! Autocorrect wanted me to write 'nobility' scooter - but that'll be The Dame and The Duchess' scooter -with Joey lowering the tone??) and climbing into the Lycra besequined toga.
On the seventh day of treatment my BC gave to me:
7 hairless months (for Ali) OR A Heavenly hairy face (for those of us 'lucky' enough to escape Chemo but 'enjoying' the benefit of HT!)
6 fleeces flayling,
5 years on meds,
4 weeks of rads
3 blue tittoos
2 nasty scars
And the BCC Forum
On the eighth day of treatment my BC gave to me:
8 meeting in Morecambe
7 hairless months/heavenly hairy face
etc etc etc
A Monday morning and I'm writing this in bed with a mugatea.Bliss! 🙂
Am I on time? I'm ready, I think. Isn't my costume wonderful? But this frozen turkey crown on my head is SO cold I might have to take it off.
Who's that doing the hosting/starting? Face looks a bit familiar but can't put a name to him. Vernon Kaye? Dale Winton?
I've put a bet on Katy winning as she has so much more experience but I will try my best to win. Practice has been severely limited though so I'm not hopeful. Perhaps I'll just try for the "most spectators taken out" prize!!
And we're off!! FF has streaked ahead, establishing a massive lead as the race left the station hotel, but the police stopped her and made her put some clothes on, which allowed Grumpy to catch up. However Meg stopped to be admired by her people so KTC took advantage. But wait! Who's that coming storming down the prom jet propelled by her own digestive system? JCJ (who had lamb last night) storms ahead only to become entangled in a couple of camels pushing shopping trolleys - trust Hump and Dink to try to do the supermarket bit first?!
FF has felled 3 small boys, 2 toddlers and an elderly couple but KTC's just managed to wipe out an entire family in one charge around The Madlands - cream everywhere!!
Next on to Morrison's: KTC snatches up a lettuce and makes her way to the check out, not so fast sunshine, JCJ has your purse! Mwahaha! Rocketing down the isle come 2 mad dogs and an Englishwoman, but it's not sunny, or midday so they are unsure of procedure.
Oh no! Here come H&D again, this time *wearing* the trolleys - they've taken a fancy to JCJ's reindeer and want to look the same. Down goes the display stand - mince pies and puddings rolling everywhere - taking advantage of the mayhem all charioteers depart to continue up the prom. More pedestrian casualties as the Benchlanders barge through knocking everyone out of their way. Thrice around Eric, getting in an unholy tangle, handbags flayling, holey tights at half mast, tinsel disintegrating as then they stampeed into The Kings. Tea all round. Who was the winner? Lord knows! Who cares? Competitive? Us? Never!?!
I've got my sparkley jumper and tights on, Meg has practiced her royal waving, Joey has rather let the side down by keeping a rollup behind his ear and wiping his nose on the sleeve of his leather jacket!!!
Starting at 9pm, so lights switch on at 8-30PM, ready for judging by - wait for it- Jeremy Clarkson!!!!! He thinks he's coming to judge classic cars LOL. Joey is ready to put muddy paws up his trousers, and Meg said Jeremy WHO????? In that superior corgi way..... No cheating, such as camel-power allowed.
Remember the route - start at the car park next to Ritas then up the prom to Eric, 3 times round Eric, back down to the Madlands for presentations for the various categories (choose your own) the mulled wine and canapes in the bar.
First aid stations every 20 metres for cake, glitterberry juice and anything else you fancy, stopping at all of them is compulsory!!!!
We will enter the naff chariot and trailer category, as we have trimmed up with rusty tinsel, cracked baubles, broken fairy lights, and old cotton wool snow.
Blinded..............by tears of laughter, have no idea who won?????????
All I know is that at one point, I was propelled into mid air by JCJ's wind power, not sure if I went backwards or forwards.
Did think everyone looked soooooooooooo pretty at the start, loved grumpy & co's "common" look, well done!!
As for FF, and her turkey crown, her poor frozen head, as she started to sprint, crown managed to defrost, saw it bounce and crack that poor man, ouchy. Good job the medics were hanging around.
Are the silent choir performing next? xx
Oh my lord, I'm exhausted, I WAS wearing clothes, the police had no right to stop me,It cost me the race! I was perfectly decent. After that , it seems to have been a blur. (Real life....turkey crown now in Son's freezer, that's our Christmas dinner sorted). Hump and Dink just ,.... well....they're Hump and Dink aren't they? What happened? I seem to remember going round Eric twice and then there was a cup of tea!
Obviously Katy won......, who else? So much more experience! And I won my bet!
Silent choir performing on Christmas Eve at 7;30. Hope we've all been practising. O Holey Tights is still my favourite., .....although the Twelve Days of Christmas is running it close, as is OISNC, just how do we choose?
On the ninth day of treatment my BC gave to me:
9 ladies dancing (around their handbags?)/skating/swimming/diving/racing* (*select according to current madness)
8 meeting in Morecambe,
7 hairless months/heavenly hairy faces,
6 fleeces flayling
5 years on meds,
4 weeks of rads
3 blue tittoos
2 nasty scars
And the BCC Forum
On the tenth day of treatment my BC gave to me:
10 cramped leg leapings,
9 ladies dancing
etc etc etc
Loving this not having to be dressed and out of the house (or even out of bed!!) by 8am. Message from famous store (Jack Smallforests) to say my parcel is on its way - lovely double handled soup bowls, a last minute purchase for OH's Christmas present - he struggles with soup because of his shaky hand - so I'd better get dressed before the delivery man arrives!!
FF, we don't need to choose! We'll sing all of them! I hope you've all be learning the words?
We'll have carols by the lake with lashings of glitterberry juice, hot mince pies with brandy butter and/or cream and Christmas alliburgers I've been throwing edible glitter in the lake, - gilt with the guilt, as it were - for weeks now so the meat should be nice and sparkly, and we'll add cranberry sauce and my amazing sausage and apple stuffing for extra festiveness! 🙂
What a plonker! Did my usual and got famous store 'JL' (= 2 boys' names) confused with another famous store/catalogue (not sure it exists anymore?) 'L'(= smallforests). Parcel coming from former! Always have got those 2 trading establishments confused!! I really should stay off the glitterberry juice??! 😛
How are you lot feeling after last night's shenanigans? It sounds like the race was a lot of (completely bonkers) fun and most of you avoided arrest/serious injury/fines....or did you???? 😉
I just popped in for a quick visit to the benches - a cheek each on F**king Furious and Guilty (doesn't every visit have to include a spell on good old Guilty?) benches as I type. I had a Christmas card today from someone I know from a place we used to live 10 years ago. She moved to the area shortly before we moved away and although I've seen her on and off since we moved, in the context of a wider group of friends, we weren't close. The card is full of good wishes and professions of love and promises that 'You'll get through this' after hearing my diagnosis and surgery, etc from another, closer friend.
So why am I furious? I was really upset to begin with but couldn't work out why. She's never sent me a card before, we just don't have that ongoing relationship although we get on well when we do see each other. Then I realised I'm angry because my situation is being used as a topic of conversation/entertainment among that group of friends & acquaintances and her pity suddenly elevates our friendship to one where we..... Well, what? I fall apart on her shoulder and give her more of the gory details to gossip over? With, naturally, the ability to carry on with her life uninterrupted, except for the odd juicy tidbit of news about poor ole Tatty. Aaaargh! And then, of course, I feel hugely guilty for thinking and feeling all that.
Sorry to be a party pooper, but I was surprised how upset and angry this made me feel. I think I might need to order an Over-reacting bench and carefully place it in a secluded corner 😉
At the risk of annoying you all by my popping up yet again, I felt I had to reply to Tat. Don't feel bad about those thoughts, we've all been there. All had them.
But, although I don't know the person in question, is it possible she might just desperately want to do SOMETHING. She may genuinely be concerned for you. I think I may have done something similar if I were the acquaintance. A way of showing I care but less intrusive than a visit/phone call. Just a thought, but by all means, be angry; be VERY angry, but with the b******d cancer, not well meaning, but possibly ill-advised well wishers!!
There's an old thread on here called "stupid things ( non-cancer) people have said." Have a look. You'll laugh, be angry and also realise.....we've all been there!! Hugs. x
Thanks, JCJ, it helps so much to know others have felt these feelings - gives me hope that I won't always be so irrational and ungrateful!. I've calmed down a lot since typing that and had arrived at more or less the same conclusion. She's not really the type to gossip, although others in the same friendship group are.... I'm just hyper sensitive at the moment and woke up feeling very flat today, so something was bound to get me! Instead of joining in the chariot race last night I watched 'Still Alice' with the family. Possibly not the best film to watchat this particular point in my life... 😉
Glad you feel better tat, it is true we have all had different feelings about things, that's the beauty of the forum, we all get it soooooooooooo just rant, rave or whatever but do not hang on to any GUILT, throw it in the lake and be rid, difficult but as we have all said this is probably the first time that it's actually all about you and your feelings, it's allowed tat! So just go for it girl!
Ta da have purchased my lettuce and funnily enough a large sweet box just fell into my chariot, oh well will just have to eat them now.
Oh dear another takeaway tonight, bad moi!! xx