Firstly, I want to say hi and to send you a virtual hug. You have had a lot to deal with in a short space of time and you need to be kind to yourself. You’ve come to the right place here as there is a lot of support and knowledge.
I too hesitated in telling my elderly parents so do understand your fear about informing them. Seabreeze has some fantastic advice in how to move forward with this. My personal experience was that my Dad was undergoing tests for prostate cancer at the time plus my parents were then about to fly abroad, long haul, for several weeks depending on the results. They did subsequently go abroad and I told them my news on their return. You may wish to tell your parents sooner but please don’t feel you informing them will break them. Their response may surprise you. However only you will know when and how to tell them.
Sending you a well deserved hug.
Just spotted your post - I'm so sorry, no wonder you are reeling - that's a lot to go through and take in.
Sounds like the medical team are being rapid in their response which is good.
Besides you saying the patches are small, I have often heard/read that breast cancer is one of the cancers which generally tends to be more responsive to treatment, so this should follow for the secondaries - hopefully they can treat and keep in relative abeyance (I'm not an expert....I feel like I'm straying into this part of the forum again having had a "highly suspicious" level of secondary scare a couple of years ago - my initial diagnosis was 6.5 years ago in my early 40's).
Do you have a flatmate, partner or close friend who is aware of what's happened and who you can confide in and get support from? Will someone be at home when you get out of hospital? If not could you bubble with someone who has been shielding, depending upon what the medic's have advised?
Totally understand your feelings re telling you parents. Perhaps speak to close friends first as you try to take the news in yourself, and after that contact your parents and let them know. I'm sure they would want to support you as best they can, even if that's over the phone (given this weird lockdown world). Just a thought but do you have any brothers/sisters who could lockdown bubble with your parents (if they are close enough) so they are there when you tell them?
I appreciate everyone's diagnosis and location of secondaries vary, but I did spot a couple of positive news discussions in the secondaries part of the forum recently. I think there's another strand but can't find it at the moment:
Sending you a big virtual hug.
I'm sure others will post soon,
Hi, never through i would be on this group this time writing this...
had breast cancer 5 years ago, had complete pathology response from chemotherapy and all was looking good. I got diagnosed at 33 and I am now 38.
new year’s Eve starting to feel a bit faint and headaches then went to a and e last Sunday and passed out, done cT scan and have found 2’small bit in the brain, small bit in the lung and another small bit in the chest wall..
I feel scared as expected...haven’t told my parents yet as they are older and I am
frightened this will finish them off...
plan is to get out of hospital today and
come back in for radiotherapy next week...
not sure what other treatments I will have for the other bits in my body yet, but pretty sure it may be chemo..
I am trying to keep a bit positive that what they have found is small and hopefully more treatable.
sorry for the long post