It sounds like you're having a pretty worrying time at the moment. I'm sure the users of this site will be along to support you soon.
In the meantime may I suggest you give the helpline a call and talk this through with a trained member staff. Here you can share your concerns with someone who will offer you a listening ear as well as emotional support and practical information. The free phone number is 0808 800 6000 and the lines are open Monday to Friday 9.00 to 5.00 and Saturday 10.00 to 2.00.
Best wishes Sam, BCC Facilitator