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A moan about medical professionals refusing to believe lesbians exist

6 REPLIES 6

Re: A moan about medical professionals refusing to believe lesbians exist

Carolihne - I agree the medics have to check pregnancy status for the reasons you list. But often how it's done /failure to cross check medical notes / staff reaction to patient coming out makes an already stressful moment worse.

Best wishes
Gus.

Re: A moan about medical professionals refusing to believe lesbians exist

 Maybee I'm missing the point here but surely lesbian and bi women can get pregnant - either through IVF, surrogacy or Rape : (

OK the medics need to be tactful but surely the question still needs to be asked?

Sorry if I have offended or got the wrong end of the stick - maybee I shouldn't have strayed onto this section of the forum.

cheers

Caroline

Re: A moan about medical professionals refusing to believe lesbians exist

I love moorcow's suggestion. I've been referred into the menopause clinic at our local sexual health centre by my oncologist, so I suspect I may have to use that line sooner than I think. On the other hand, website of said service seems to be falling over itself to be inclusive, so maybe not!

All the radiologists I encountered during treatment took my word for it when I said I wasn't pregnant, in fact they apologised for asking. I've posted elsewhere about how my late civil partner was converted into a dead husband (who couldn't have got me pregnant) at my first chemo appointment, which I can laugh about now but was beyond upsetting at the time - all credit to the chemo nurse who recovered the situation as best she could.

Re: A moan about medical professionals refusing to believe lesbians exist

I don't think it's to do with a refusal to believe lesbians exist - more to do with the tick-box mentality caused by litigation concerns if anything goes wrong.  Back in 2007 when I was being treated, my teenage daughter started a course of roaccutane - the strong anti-acne drug that can only be prescribed by a hospital consultant.  This drug can cause terrible problems with unborn babies (think thalidomide here) - so female patients are expected to go on the pill before they can receive the drug, plus they are expected to use a condom as well, so a belt and braces approach to prevent pregnancy.  My daughter was not in a relationship, had never been in a relationship, and I was adamant she was not being put on the pill just so someone could tick a box.  Not when I was being treated for hormone positive BC.  I had to be very forceful about this, or they would have prevailed.  In the end they agreed I could sign a disclaimer and she didn't need to go on the pill.

Re: A moan about medical professionals refusing to believe lesbians exist

Yep- happens to my O/H all the time- we haven't reallly had any negative responses but quite often a lot of ''are you sures''. This is usually followed my me saying ''oh yes, absolutely sure, I fire blanks'' , followed by a wink ! We've had various responses to that but usually the penny drops & they at least smile !

Re: A moan about medical professionals refusing to believe lesbians exist

Yes sorry to say I have - however I have also had really good experiences; one trainee doctor was very unphased about my sexuality and continued to ask pertinent questions relevant to my medical problems and not stupid ones like are you pregnant...

I am wondering , altho it does require us to always be at our best most assertive selves, if we teach the doctors / others more by just saying really clearly - look I have not had sex with a man since / ever / etc...so no i am not pregnant...

sometimes one just feels too small for that....but just putting refused pregnancy test is really unhelpful. grrr,

 

bye for now

A moan about medical professionals refusing to believe lesbians exist

One thing that drives me mad is whenever I need an x-ray, including mammograms at times, or when I've needed ops, medical professionals, quite properly ask "is there any possibility you could be pregnant?" It's not that which drives me mad, but their response to my emphatic "no!" If I can't remember the date of my last period (common), my repeated responses that there's still no way it's possible, is met by an insistence that they'll have to do a pregnancy test. Even after spelling it out to them, they've still been known to insist on a pregnancy test. Last time I had an op I refused point blank (it seems a total waste of scarce NHS resources doing pregnancy tests on patients who cannot possibly be pregnant), so on the bottom of the consent form in large capital letters (in red ink) someone scrawled "patient refused pregnancy test". The first question the anaesthetist asked when I saw him before the op was why I'd refused a pregnancy test, meaning I had to out myself twice in one day to medical staff. The fact that it was a waste of resources to do a test seemed to be beyond their comprehension. My mum too had a similar experience, only in her case no-one had thought to check back in her records. If they had done they'd have realised she'd had a hysterectomy three years previously!

Has anyone else encountered this sort of thing?