A new BBC drama - The C Word

[lavendersblue]

Hi Patsy , have been wondering how you are doing ? Any news yet ? Do keep in touch .
Hugs,
Jill xx

[Patsysupport]

Hi Jill I have a suspected angiosarcoma back to hospital this Friday to discuss I feel v angry that sthg supposed to help has come back to bite me 7 years later .. It seems to be quite rare and can only hope a mastectomy will stop it!! Hope you are doing ok ..

[lavendersblue]

Have finally watched this programme , and have to say what a brilliant production it was ..... I thought everyone in it was fantastic . Like Jillybee , I didn't find it very weepy .... and didn't shed a tear , but I could relate to it all so well . Sheridan Smith played the her role brilliantly and it brought back many memories of my own experiences . Well done to everyone involved in making it and bringing it to our screens .
Hugs,
Jill x

[jillybee]

I have just watched it.Not as weepy as I thought I would be.Lovely surgeon/oncologist,and acting was superb.Just some of the hospital scenes left me thinking this is not real,as too posh for my NHS hospital ....

[Zeppa]

When I was having treatment from 2008 on, I read Lisa's blog as it unfolded, not expecting her to die. (I haven't got secondaries myself). It was a brilliant blog. One great thing was that instead of just recording every day like a diary, she would take a topic and discuss it in depth. I suppose the blog also helped her friends and family know the details of what she was going through.

There's no way a 90-minute film can do justice to that. I agree with borbie: I am afraid it will not inform people what it's like having breast cancer. They will go on expecting us either to die or to be completely recovered the minute the primary treatment ends.

Having said that, Sheridan Smith was great. I also thought the second half was very well done. And some topics were gone into in more depth. But the beginning seemed a bit weepy, and I suppose it had to be.

A very difficult book to film.

[lavendersblue]

I have read some of Lisa's blog and have recorded the programme , although I haven't actually watched it yet . I plan to watch it on my own , as I know my hubby is not strong enough to cope with it !!

I am caught between two stools , I was diagnosed with PBC in 2008 , WLE with SNB , followed by axillary clearence , chemo for 6 months , then three weeks rads and 5 years of Arimidex . Apart from a major hiccough in 2012 when I was also diagnosed with thyroid cancer , I was just starting to recover mentally from the dreadful fears of breast cancer and allow it to fade into my subconscious when bam .....it comes back to bite me in the bum on Christmas Eve last year . Not SBC in my case but angiosarcoma ...caused directly by my radiotherapy treatment ....
It is very aggressive and I had to have a radical mastectomy in January , I am already facing the threat of recurrence and need another skin punch biopsy on Monday ...real bummer !!!

I am passionate that education is our only way forward ....if we don't know that these awful parts of the disease and treatments are there lying in wait for us , it is like burrying our heads in the sand and hoping it will go away ....believe me it won't .

Hopefully in time there will be a cure for us all , until then knowledge is our only weapon .

Hugs,
Jillxxx

[canx]

Thanks Jo - I think these would be really good for any normal bloke ( 🙂 ), but ... he came along to a meeting with my cancer care nurse and she gave me some more information for my ring binder file, together with one for him, with information for partners - I read it that evening and said you'll find this useful and he just growled at it/me! 🙂  I mentioned the brochure to him again after we'd finished watching The C Word and even said that the reason I'd broken down when I saw the husband crying was because I was worried about how much he was taking on - I just got told not to worry about him, he's fine, it's his job to look after me, etc.   Dinosaur, still thinks men aren't supposed to talk about their feelings! 🙂  

I'll bear this is mind for further down the road, see if I can persuade him after the surgery/results, thanks again.

Cx

[catchpole]

Thanks Naz, yes think youve hit nail on head. For me i spose i only had ,lumpdectomy and my breasts look fine, small scar but ive still got all of them,My arm is a bit tight and looks a bit different where nodes removed but apart from that you wouldnt know id had operation. Also of course no chemo means hair etc ,all intact, and tamoxifent no obvious side effects So to all intents and purposes, i,m the same, ive always ben skinny but after i had my hystectomy 7 years ago i lost weight half a stone,  a lot for little me, but suddenly ive put that back on so my face looks fuller, someone told me i look betterlol., But inside my ghead i dont feel ths same, i wan t to do more with my life but on pensions bit difficult, i feel i now want a job, to enable me to do what i want, i never want to retire anyway, if on own whats the point,  I feel i must dso more with my life i sit said friends dog and love him to bits but now feel spendfing most afternoons doing that just isnt enough, but she seems to expect it to be enough, it isnt.  After rads start tomorrow must do more and get a job, but goodness know if i can june

[Jo_BCC]

Hi canx

I have put for you below the link to BCC's publication 'In it together' it's aimed at partners of those with a BC diagnosis.  I hope both you and your OH find it helpful.  There is a board here for Family Partners and Friends - here's the link: http://forum.breastcancercare.org.uk/t5/Supporting-someone-with-breast/ct-p/supporting_someone_with_...

In it together: http://forum.breastcancercare.org.uk/t5/Supporting-someone-with-breast/ct-p/supporting_someone_with_...

Your OH is also very welcome to call our helpline if he needs to talk to someone away from family and friends and in confidence, the team are here to support you both.  Calls are free 0808 800 6000.

I hope this helps.

Kind regards,

Jo, Moderator

[canx]

Newly diagnosed, surgery scheduled in two weeks' time.  I watched this with my OH.  Sheridan Smith was brilliant, but, strangely, it wasn't a scene with her that finally made me cry, it was where it showed her husband break down and cry - that resonated with me because my OH is being so good and so strong, but I'm concerned about his lack of a support network.  He doesn't do social media, so, even if I showed him this site (is there a partner's board?), he wouldn't use it and, due to his work, his friends are dotted around the country and he wouldn't get the chance of going for a pint to offload on them.  I bought the ebook straight after we finished watching.  Me being weird, people had been commenting for the last couple of weeks how positive I've been, but, since watching that, my head's been in a whirl and I'm in tears again.  Have to admit though, I haven't slept very well since diagnosis 😞  The OH's out, so I can vent! 🙂

Love and strength to all xx

[borbie]

I watched it on catchup as had my son and gf home for the weekend and didnt want to watch with them and my husband. The only part that made me cry was when she came out of bathroom having lost most of her hair.  For me it didnt go anywhere near telling ' the public' about all the awful parts, recovering from initial surgery, loss of sensation in the arm,constant pain from pins and needles, doing all the exercises when in so much discomfort etc, i know they are all smaller things but all add up to making life miserable.  Whilst i think it was a good drama and obviously she had input which made it real, they have to condense and was alot about her blog which i feel goes on here every day (and night!) with even better help -

i was diagnosed in feb, WLE and sentinel node showed spread, 2 weeks ago had axillary clearance ( all clear) and hysterectomy 5 days later, as found something in ovary and uterus which susequently turned out to be ok too.  Awaiting chemo and radio but still recovering from 2 ops in close sucession.  It seems to me to be a constant treadmill of discomfort, nausea and tiredness and waiting for the next bit to make you feel like 'sh*t .  People keep telling me i am the strongest most positive person i know which i frequently DONT feel like at the moment and feel i have to fit their bill to keep some happy. My husband is wonderful but like most men doesnt know what to say or do and i feel he's the one who hears it all, (suppose we did say 'For better, for worse' so he signed up for it!)

Dont be frightened of watching it - i'm a nurse and its a bit like watching Casualty and picking holes in it for not being accurate, everybody's experience is different so look at it like that 🙂

Nedd to add that Lisa's own blog is actually fantastic - reality, just felt TV portrayal was more about her doing the blog, not its true content if that makes sense?

[NAZ]

Hi Belinda

Yes I hear what you are saying totallly re: Pink October, I despise how BC is portrayed during this month. In my view, it does not raise public awareness of the brutality of this disease, it does not make the public aware that 12000 women are lost to BC each year or the emotional, psychological and physical implications of being DX with BC, either for primary or secondary ladies. Yes, many women do survive  and go on to live long and healthy lives, but at what cost and a free boob job does not come anywhere near the reality does it? But I have often wondered where the secondary ladies feature in Pink October and I can well imagine that this is something which is discussed many a time. I hate the way BC is 'glammed' up too, like it is the 'best' kind of cancer to be diagnosed with because all this does is fuel reactions like that of Catchpoles friend. 'Well you look well, so you must be well'! Not the case for many primary or secondary ladies I am sure.. I do hope that The C word helped to brush off some of the misconceptions regarding BC, treatment and being diagnosed with secondaries.

NAZ XXX

[belinda]

Hi Naz, you have hit the nail on the head there, many people really do not realise BC is a killer. Seems, to me, the October awareness month has lead to many untouched by BC to think it's a curable cancer. A "good" cancer to get if you have to have one. Heck a free boob job. 😞
We have mentioned this again and again on the Secondaries forums as we've all heard of BC described as the "sexy" cancer. Sexy, in fund raising, media terms of it appealing to fund raisers, charities, the public more so than perhaps bowel or other cancers. This is SO frustrating for those who feel they are expected to shrug off their worries and now they are "cured" all surgery done get on with life and those of us who are living with secondaries. The 12,000 deaths a year are forgotten, ignored, not mentioned much at all. So both ends of the spectrum are losing out. Frustrating doesn't cover it. X
PS I do think this is why the drama at the weekend would have been helpful in getting the message out.

[NAZ]

Hi Catchpole

I think many would agree that once you have had the initial surgery and you begin to look reasonably fit and well, the support quickly disappears as people assume that you are fine. They seem to fail to understand that BC can kill (although not everyone) and that it can leave deep emotional and psychological scars, which are not visible on the outside. The other thing is that your friend may be in denial. You both lost a mututal friend last year, she sees you are well in yourself and not needing chemo, so she assumes that that all is fine. People generally don't want to hear the 'but it can kill you..' Or see the scars from brutal surgery, or the missing breast/breasts (far too scary to cope with), so instead, people just come out with the 'well you are well now, what's the problem' and that can be VERY frustrating to deal with. I am a few years post DX now and i can tell you, that just knowing that The C word was on over the weekend, sent my brain and emotions into a spin and i didn't watch it either. No one mentioned the programme to me and no one ever mentions BC to me any more either because as far as they are concerned, its over, done and dusted and yes to a degree it is over and life goes on but that does not stop me being fearful at times or feeling angry at the loss of my natural breast etc etc. Once treatment ends, you do find that people behave and react very differently to you and that for me was the hardest thing to cope with because it is often the time when you need the support the most.

Wishing you well with your recovery (sorry to have rambled, hope it made sense, kind of!).

Naz xxxx

[catchpole]

I didnt watch it but saw the trailer and the reviews but reading her story in [paper was enough. I m not sorry i didnt watch, it i lost a dear friend to Breast cancer last year before i got it myself so i know i couldnt cope with watching it.   I live on my own and now im just about to start my rads, and most of ,my friends seem to think everything is back to normal.but of course it isnt is is.  I still get moments when i burst into tears for no reason., I truly think people were more supportive and concerned when they thought i d have to have chemo,.now i havent and god knows im grateful for that, cause i have my hair still and look perfectlly healthy its like it never happened.  Do others who recovered reasonably quickly like me have to contend with this, it smetimes seems ;like people are behaving like i never had cancer. No i dont want them to dwell on it,i dont want to, but when i first had it many were all over me, one friend in particular, now she seems indifferent and even said other week "well you are better now" i said yes  feel ok but ive had cancer it still can kill you like it did ..........our mutual friend,  What is with people im not sure how the hell im supposed to react.june

[songbird68]

sh** I watched it.

Love you all
x x

[Tinkerbelle]

I, like Belinda and other ladies who have posted, have secondary breast cancer and know what the outcome will be for me. I understand how fearful it can be to have primary breast cancer but feel that acknowledging secondary breast cancer, the number of lives lost everyday and the need for more research and funding into this area will help to make the future less frightening.

I think Sheridan Smith did a good job of portraying the realities of breast cancer but understand that it could be upsetting for the newly diagnosed/those recovering.

[Poppy3]

Hi - I have recorded it as I knew it would be too close to home and want to watch it on my own. Part of me wants to watch it to see if how I am feeling is normal! One day I want to climb Mount Everest the next I'd like to hide away all day and cry. I'm a bit like you I start to feel positive and happy with everything then I hear of news like Rio's wife and I am back to square one. Not sure how you get past this, if I find out I will let you know. My 1st year check up is in 3 weeks and I feel sick just thinking about it, I try to think happy thoughts, like fave holidays, fave chocs and if I want to do/go somewhere I just do it rather than put it off. Helps me to focus on other things not just the Cancer.

[sheba56]

Hi I watche dthe first hour up until she goes back to work. Didn't know what the ending was going to be but guessed that it wouldn't be good. Cried through loads of it and found it too close to home. Has really unnerved me and undone alot of the positive work I've done in coping with this disease. I'm waiting for the results of my 1st year mammogram (nearly 3 weeks there has been a back log) and am terrified.

Have come to the conclusion that living with the fear of it getting you in the end is the hardest part. Not sure how you come to terms with this. Really wished I hadn't watched although as I knew it was on (you can't avoid the trailers) I felt a compulsion to have a go. Brilliant acting but really wished it hadn't been on as I don't really think it helps.

[belinda]

Hi La-La, I don't think, personally, there is much to be gained watching the programme for advice on knowing signs for secondaries. I was diagnosed with secondaries from the very beginning but secondaries often present no definite signs or very vague symptoms for quite a long while. Lisa's blog is still online but see how you feel about reading it at perhaps a later date?
The early days, weeks, of diagnosis are such a shock. Be kind to yourself. X

[La-La]

Thank you Nighthawk.
Just diagnosed so just starting the journey.
Great to hear from you xx

Getting a lot of well meaning messages asking me if I watched it and if I am alright.. hmm.
I don't know if timing is right for me to watch it, but does anyone with secondary think it is a good idea for primary sufferers to watch (or read blog) up front as an education re knowing signs of secondary?

[songbird68]

I saw the site warning that this was on, so I googled Lisa - found her blog and that it didn't end well (cried just reading that). I did not watch the program. You lot are braver than me!
I am very glad that it was on though, because it will raise awareness.
x x

[Christina0]

I was diagnosed with Triple Negative Invasive Ductal Carcinoma last year - the tumour had reached 7 cm in size before mastectomy.

I found the programme very true, Lisa was a truly inspirational, brave young lady, who was surrounded by love, and taken so cruelly too early.

I hope Lisa is up there having a ball, no more pain. xx

[Nighthawk]

I am over 8 years from diagnosis and consider myself very resilient and positive in the way I dealt with my initial diagnosis. Watching the brill at C word tonight has evoked many memories of dealing with breast cancer and the harsh reality of chemotherapy as well as fears of recurrence! It is along time since breast cancer has kept me awake all night, hence my first post on the forum! But agree the fantastic portrayal by Sheriden Smith did Lisa proud!

[TheGen]

I am 3 and a half years past treatment for my primary diagnosis and have finally been able to get on with my life, so found this the hardest thing to watch though of course brilliantly acted by Sheridan Smith and terribly sad for the story it told and the reminder that it could still happen to me.
It is a wonderful story to tell for people who haven't gone through this and don't have an understanding of the feelings and processes that go along with breast cancer treatments, but again, brought me to tears from the moment she was in the consultants room.
I will be back there myself on Tuesday for my annual check up and is the only time of the year I think about it now, but well done the BBC for such a wonderful drama and the family for allowing it 😔

[Marie123]

Watched the show,and found it poignant , funny in parts upsetting and so much more. Feeling quite fragile infact  .as I write this. I hope it has an impact on the 3% spent on sbc and also how people react to people suffering sbc.  Well done to Sheridan  and the BBCfor making this. Hope this all makes sense , but feeling quite upset.

Marie xxx

[C_Dancer]

I watched it.  Wished I hadn't.  It was brilliantly acted by Sheridan Smith but it was too close to home for me.  My partner put a reminder on for this drama as he had heard it was uplifting.  Bless him.  He is working nights so I am on my jack jones and not feeling uplifted. 

---

@Anna_BCC wrote:

A new drama is being shown on BBC1 Sunday night 8.30-10.00, The C Word. We are aware that the subject could be very emotive for those living with breast cancer, secondary breast cancer and their families. We have immediate support available to you via our website: http://www.breastcancercare.org.uk/breast-cancer-information as well as all the support so readily available from everyone on this forum, day or night.

The Helpline will re-open after the bank holiday on Tuesday morning 9am and will be ready to take any calls for support or answer any questions you may have.

In the meantime please use this open space to share your views with each other.

For those of you who are looking for particular support please follow the links below

If you are living with breast cancer but are no longer on active treatment

If you have a diagnosis of secondary breast cancer

Supporting someone with breast cancer

Are you a younger woman with breast cancer?

Are you a man with breast cancer?

Best wishes

Anna

Forum Coordinator

---

[Seashell60]

I watched The C Word with my husband, both trying not to look at each other, I watched with tears every so often running out the side of my eyes. Although I am recovering from a primary diagnosis of Stage 2 Invasive Lobular cancer as in the program, I felt that I had to watch how the remarkable Sheridan Smith took the role of how Lisa Lynch coped with her cancer in such a no nonsense, sensitive way. Part of me also hoped that my family and friends were able to watch, and maybe get a sense of what it was like for myself and others going through this awful disease. 

Cheers, Michele x

P.S. - It goes without saying that thoughts and prayers go out to Rio Ferdinand and his family in their time of sadness. X

[Curleychris]

Just watched this and found it difficult to watch as I don't really think those who live me appreciate what it is like.
I am not living with secondaries but still living with the after affects of primary breast cancer. I think it was well acted .

[belinda]

Yes I thought it was very true to living life with secondaries. Really well done.

[didi62]

I have just watched the show and thought it was very well done.Sheridan Smith was amazing.it really showed how hard it is for all the family and friends to cope with someone they love being diagnosed.it took prosseco,chocolate and tissues to get through it though.

[Tournesol]

I do appreciate that some people won't want to watch the programme, and although I used to follow Lisa's blog I am not sure I will watch it myself. However, I do support it being shown. Like Belinda, I have secondaries (diagnosed in 2009, 7 years after my primary diagnosis) and will almost certainly also be one of the 1000 a month who die from BC in the UK. There is still too little awareness of issues relating to secondary breast cancer, and breast cancer in young women and if the programme can help with this I think it's a good thing.
Tournesol

[Lousylou]

As a recently diagnosed Metastatic IBC - 1st FEC down I read the book for pointers on what to expect from treatment. I will watch, with a glass raised to a very brave, inspirational and funny girl.
There seems to be an assumption that it's about death. It's my understanding Lisa Lynch worked as a consultant on this, before being diagnosed with secondary liver & bone cancer. If it raises awareness amongst the younger ones who think it won 't happen to them then it'll have done its job.

[Jane1978]

It's upsetting me too as wanted to watch it but it's really to close to home 😔 my mum just been round in tears telling me she got
Rid of it then it came back two years later and 59 out of 60 nodes were positve ! My surgeon says I could have up to
6o nides affects so words are round in my head not gud!!!! I feel very negative today also with the sad news of Rios wife and think we all need some positve stuff to help us on x

[jillybee]

I am recording it,then watch it when I feel able.Seen the bit where she is shown her mammogram,that made me feel upset......I have recovered from BC.....but still undergoing surgery,following complications.Sheridan Smith is marvellous,and as long as they don't come out with the eternal platitudes,it will be watchable,albeit through my fingers.....bit like a scary film!!!

[belinda]

BC still kills one thousand women every single month in the U.K. I will eventually be one of them.
Dramas like this one today may finally help to start to acknowledge we exist and are desperate for new treatments, more money going into research for those with secondaries. Hopefully one day others may see their children grow up, live a longer life. At the moment only 3% of the monies raised towards research goes to secondary research.

[La-La]

I think the series will be too hard for a lot of us to deal with towards the end, I cannot imagine anyone going through this experience could possibly benefit from observing what is basically our deepest fear.
I know the poor woman it is based on died, so you cannot re-write history.. but for folk going through this or struggling this may be too heavy.

I am not watching anything serious on TV throughout this, just lots of Russell Howard's Good News, Friends repeats, anything that makes me laugh.
Maybe we shoukd comile a list of films to avoid whilst goung through breast cancer!
1.Terms of Endearment!
2. The one where Bette Midler sings 'You Are The Wind Beneath My Wings'
3. My Girl

Isn't it odd that we could watch them as 'entertainment' before now? All a little surreal in retrospect.

I think the series is a great idea as it will encourage women (esp younger ones) to check themselves and get straight to GP with lumps.
But surely only a masochist could enjoy watching the ending!

[catchpole]

With you there AXG, with the news about Rebecca Ferninand.they should,  Glad others feel like me.  I want to hear more positive stories about people surving the damm disease, i know people whove died, as i aid my dear friend last year and know her daughters 40th party will be bitter sweet as there will seem to be someone missing.But i cant dwell on those who died, i want to be one of those who survived and watching this sort of thing just makes it harder for me to do so and im sure for many of us.  No we wont forget those who have been raken with the damm C as i always call it but must concentrate on living.  june

[AXG]

I am coming up to my 5 year all-clear (diagnosed at age 38) and like NAZ I have spent too much of my life getting past cancer and the brutality of the treatment I had. I feel it stole the last years of my youth and my early years with my children. I have finally felt as though I have moved on this year. I understand that there is a need for true-life drama but even the knowledge that the programme is on tomorrow upsets me and brings it all back. I hope that the programme makers understand the effect it may have on cancer sufferers and give the subject sympathetic treatment but it is all far too close to home for me and my family. I am comforted greatly to know that I am not alone in feeling this way. It all feels a little too much like voyeurism over people's pain. The news today about Rio Ferdinand's wife Rebecca is heartbreaking and whilst I know it is unlikely I think it would be appropriate for the BBC to shelve the programme for a week or two.

[Wendyy]

I'll be recording as we are going on holiday tomorrow.

I read the C word several years ago before the dreaded C impinged on my life. Lisa was one feisty inspirational lady who had a gift with words I wish I had. Lisa's words often come back to me during my own diagnosis although I've not re read the book, that's the impact it obviously had on me.

I totally understand the views expressed here but if the fact that people are aware of the subject of the programme means that it raises awareness of BC and encourages people to check themselves I'm sure Lisa's family will feel her legacy will live on.

Anybody who feels they can watch it. I'm sure there'll be tears but also lots of laughs.

[NAZ]

I won't be watching this drama either. Like catchpole, I am well aware BC can kill, but I have lost years of my life to this disease! The surgery took years to complete and then I was really down for a long long time (grieving for my old body and life).

Right now, I have put BC in a box and I hope that is where it will stay.

I am 100% with you on this Catchpole, I feel that BC has taken enough from me over the years and I will not sit and watch something which will have a negative impact on my emotional well being.

Naz

[catchpole]

Yes i read her story in paper today, Biut i dont know if its just me and i know cancer can still kill, but to be honest, i dont want to watch a play about someone dying of it,  I lost a dear friend to it last September.  I think of her often, going to her daughters 40th party next friday, and she will be sorely missed  So no for me i dont want to watch it, id rather think of all those whove survived it, as i hope to.  Guess we are different and some might want to watch it, good for them,  but it wouldnt be right for me, i dont want to think about dying of it, just learning to live with it.  Thats why probably i havent got too involved with cancer groups etc, my dear friend who had ovarian is same,  we both feel we dont want to dwell on it too much, just get on with living, i feel now ive lost 6 months of my life to it, and i was more fortunate than many,  I want my rads over with and to get on with life,  Does anyone else agree with me, interested to hear what others think.June 

[raechi]

I love Sheridan Smith - and think she will do Lisa Lynch justice. I will defintely be watching...

[Anna_BCC]

A new drama is being shown on BBC1 Sunday night 8.30-10.00, The C Word. We are aware that the subject could be very emotive for those living with breast cancer, secondary breast cancer and their families. We have immediate support available to you via our website: http://www.breastcancercare.org.uk/breast-cancer-information as well as all the support so readily available from everyone on this forum, day or night.

The Helpline will re-open after the bank holiday on Tuesday morning 9am and will be ready to take any calls for support or answer any questions you may have.

In the meantime please use this open space to share your views with each other.

For those of you who are looking for particular support please follow the links below

If you are living with breast cancer but are no longer on active treatment

If you have a diagnosis of secondary breast cancer

Supporting someone with breast cancer

Are you a younger woman with breast cancer?

Are you a man with breast cancer?

Best wishes

Anna

Forum Coordinator