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Absolutely terrified, please help

20 REPLIES 20
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Re: Absolutely terrified, please help

I'm sorry to hear that you will likely have a long wait as the waiting is agony but on the positive side you are already a step closer to finding out what is causing your symptoms. You have also confided in both parents and shared your worries. In the meantime take some pain relief if you need it and try to keep busy and your mind on other things. I know that's easier said than done. Make use of the time you have to prepare well for your clinic appointment so you can have all your questions answered. Do consider taking someone with you for support and another pair of ears. Best wishes x
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Re: Absolutely terrified, please help

And whatever the result, please come back and let us know.

Jane
xxx
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Re: Absolutely terrified, please help

No he doesn't. He is worried because he loves you is all.

He wasn't with you at the doctors and probably knows nothing about it apart from what you just told him. I recommend that if/when you have any more doctors appintments you take your mum or some other person with you to help you listen to what is actually being said without being blinded and deafened by fear and anxiety.

I stress that this has nothing to do with your age, and it doesn't have to be your mother, just somebody calm and sensible is what you need. I know that telling you not to worry will not help, but you are going to be checked out, and it sounds highly unlikely that this will turn out to be a cause for concern. Hugs to you! xx
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Re: Absolutely terrified, please help

Ah Hun, no- Dad doesn't know something you don't, so please don't wear yourself out worrying about that. You're his daughter, and naturally he's worried because no parent likes their child being unwell (whether you're a toddler with a cold or an adult with a lump). Virtually everyone on here will tell you you are now facing the worst bit , the waiting. It can drive you potty, and if you're not careful you can build your symptoms in your mind into something huge and dreadful! Have you called the help line on here? They can probably chat to you about fibroadenosis and pain relief xx
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Re: Absolutely terrified, please help

Hey, just wanted to let everyone know that having spoken over the phone to the duty doctor today he was able to schedule me a last-minute appointment this evening. So, he examined me and told me that it felt very much like 'fibroadenosis of the breast' which I'm guessing has something to do with fibroadenoma (although Wikipedia reckons it's not supposed to hurt?) Anyway he has referred me to the breast clinic for an ultrasound which he said was because he wanted to put my mind at rest, not because it was anything serious and that he had marked it as 'not urgent', so I won't be able to get an appointment for weeks!! He didn't seem to be able to offer me any advice about getting rid of the pain, so I feel like something is not quite adding up here, as fibroadenomas aren't supposed to be painful - I really hope that I can get this ultrasound as quickly as possible! From reading some of the stories on here it seems as though anything relating to lumps is shrugged off as fibroadenosis when the patient is young, what do you think? xxx

P.S. I told both my parents about what the doctor said, and I overheard them talking about it in the kitchen after I'd left and my dad sounded really worried, like he thought it was actually cancer. Does he know something I don't??
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Re: Absolutely terrified, please help

Hi everyone, once again thank you for all the kind comments!
Unfortunately I phoned up the doctors' surgery this morning and they said that all appointment slots for today had been taken up (and they only let you book appointments on the day itself), and I'm going out with friends tomorrow, so I can't go then either (I don't think I'll be very much fun be around though, given all this panic)! However, the duty doctor is going to phone me this afternoon to talk about it, even though there's not much he/she can do without actually examining the lump.
I'll let you all know how it goes with the phone call, and in the meantime I'll try and stop being so tearful and anxious even though it hurts so much... xxx
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Re: Absolutely terrified, please help

Cant say more than these wise ones have said but I'm thinking of you floatingintheaether and sending you supportive vibes and hugs for tomorrow.
MMM
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Re: Absolutely terrified, please help

Don't take no for an answer from your GP. BC in someone of your age is very unusual (so the odds are hugely in your favour that it's something else), but it isn't entirely unknown. It's also true that in younger women it tends to be more advanced when diagnosed, partly because it can be hard to get GPs to take it seriously (I was told I was too young, at 44, but my GP did refer me quickly anyway) but also because it's so much harder to detect.

At your age you almost certainly won't be given a mammogram because your breast tissue will be far too dense for anything to show, so an ultrasound would probably be the first investigation.

All the very best of luck - and don't panic at a delay of a week or two, or even three, as that's completely normal. Just get to your GP asap for your own peace of mind.

Sending you a huge hug.

Jane xxx
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Re: Absolutely terrified, please help

Hi I just wanted to say that I did have a lump, it wasnt round, hard, or pea shaped.... It felt very muscular, it was wide and felt like like a strip of muscle tissue. To this day I still am shocked it was BC, so please do not worry about bothering doctors or GP's if you think something is wrong then stick with your gut instinct.
I am 48 so much older than you, but I have got my nieces to promise me they will never overlook any medical worries.
Good luck and keep us updated.
Maggie x
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Re: Absolutely terrified, please help

One thing you are not being is silly. You are the expert on your own body and how things feel. Make the GP appointment, tell the doctor exactly what you have posted here and go to the breast clinic ASAP. This is the only way to put your mind at rest and let you know exactly what is going on. The odds are it will be nothing worrying and you will have used up a couple of appointments and some of your time but you need to have it checked out.
I never had a lump. I first noticed a rash around the nipple then later there was a subtle change in texture/density of the breast tissue behind the nipple, never what I'd call a distinct lump. More than anything I went back because I just felt something wasn't right so trust your instincts.
As for your Mum I'm sure she is just as scared as you are but maybe trying to hide this so as not to worry you more. Talk to her again if you can. The not knowing is absolutely the worst part of this whole thing, Google can't help you but it can scare the crap out of you so keep away. You will find the best and most reliable info here on BCC and the Macmillan site.
Please come back and let us know how you get on x
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Re: Absolutely terrified, please help

Hi Ali, thanks for letting me know and I really hope your treatments are going well! From what I can gather a lot of women say that their lump felt different to the rest of their breast tissue, and that it didn't feel like anything they'd felt before (though if this was the case you wonder why so many shrug it off as nothing serious before it's too late). Y'see I've had lumps that are similar to this before in terms of texture/size/tenderness etc. but they've all been related to my cycle in that they'd flare up just before my period and disappear once I started - and this one won't go! Obviously this sends alarm bells ringing...
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Re: Absolutely terrified, please help

Floating, we KNOW you're not being silly. Maybe Mum's actually thinking "aaaaarrrgggghhhhh!!!!! Help, what do I do?" and thinks she can calm you by not reacting too much. Keep talking to her Hun.
You asked what a breast lump felt like? Mine was a large, hard something that hadn't been there before, or actually an edge of something that felt different. I would guess that lumps can all feel very different, and not tick all the boxes as it were...
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Re: Absolutely terrified, please help

Thank you everyone for being so kind, it's really appreciated!

And Ellie, I'm really sorry to hear about your friend, and that she suffered for all that time before getting a diagnosis! It just goes to show that it is possible at our age - I hope she responds well to treatment. It's also very irresponsible of your doctors to give you an ultrasound appointment and then not go ahead with it because they couldn't feel anything, surely they may as well have scanned you just to make sure? Anyway, I'm glad that you've found someone else, and I hope everything goes well for you on Friday and that you get some closure! xxx
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Re: Absolutely terrified, please help

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Re: Absolutely terrified, please help

Hi Floating,

I agree with Poems. None of us here can tell you whether you have cancer or not. Only the breast specialists can do that with the help of mammograms and ultrasound images. Even GP's don't have the experience, so please don't let your GP fob you off. You must insist on a referal to the breast clinic. Stand your ground.

Stop googling ...... you cannot self diagnose breast cancer from the internet, but you can worry yourself silly.

You are not being silly at all, you are being responsible, and your mum is wrong to say that. Why would your friends think you are crazy? What would they do in the same position? I would try telling your BF at the very least.

Good luck, and let us know how you get on. xxx
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Re: Absolutely terrified, please help

Hi Floating

Firstly, you are not being silly. You must get to your GP ASAP and INSIST on being referred to breast clinic. Nobody can tell what your lump is without it being investigated properly. Hopefully it will be something other than cancer, but for your own peace of mind - you must find out one way or the other. Sending BIG HUGS, and wishing you goo luck.

Poemsgalore xxx
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Re: Absolutely terrified, please help

Hi girls,

Floating, I am going through a similar thing at the moment. I m 21 so not much older than you, and my friend has BC at the moment and she is only 24. (She was fobbed off by docs for 2 years before being diagnosed). Going through the same worrying stage as you at the moment, for the second time in fact. Had breast pain a couple of times in the last four months, went for ultrasound after my GP referred me but they wouldnt even scan me because they couldnt feel anything!

I now think I can feel something in the area that was hurting but i am so unsure whether it feels smooth or hard or moveable or anything! It might even just be tissue, its so hard to tell at our young age because our breasts are so dense. I am waiting for a new appointment with a different doc on Friday.

Like Ali said, dont google! Its the worst thing possible. driven myself to near insanity with googling!

Stick to this site on here, one of the really great threads is the one in younger women where people have posted their stories about how they got diagnosed. Its so great to hear how people have progressed through their diagnosis, and itl make you feel tons better, that even if (god forbid) it is BC, its not the end of the world and it is so treatable these days.

Remember sweetheart you are so young and have no family history. Yes, its possible but its so very unlikely. Don't let yourself worry too much and let us know what happens at the docs.

Ellie x
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Re: Absolutely terrified, please help

Hi Ali, yes I've spoken to my mum about it (too embarrassed to talk to anyone else; they'll think I'm crazy!) but she thinks I'm being silly and isn't very sympathetic...you're right though, the worst part is not knowing and there's so much conflicting information about what does and doesn't indicate BC - for every source that tells me pain/moveability/lumpiness means it's benign, another tells me it means a malignancy - I guess I'll have to stop googling! I was wondering, if it's not too much to ask, if anyone who has had a lump that was found to be breast cancer could tell me what it felt like? And also, given my age, is it likely that the cancer is very aggressive (I've heard that this is often the case with younger women)?

Apologies if I come across as over-dramatic/disrespectful to any sufferers out there xxx
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Re: Absolutely terrified, please help

Hi Floating! What I would suggest is, firstly, do not google your symptoms nor breast cancer any more - there's such a lot of false and misleading information out there. Stick with this site or the Macmillan one for info. Tomorrow, ring your doctor, book yourself an appointment. Nothing bad is going to happen lump-wise in the length of time it will take to get an appointment, so try to not worry about that....and then ring the helpline as Lucy suggests.
Im sorry I can't second guess what the lump might be, please remember that in the vast majority of cases it isn't cancer. Have you got someone at home or a friend you can talk to to share your fear? Someone to hold your hand and give you a cuddle? The not knowing really is the worst bit , at least once you know what this is you can deal with it xx
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Re: Absolutely terrified, please help

Hi Floatinginthewater and welcome to the BCC forums

You may find it useful to call our helpline to talk your concerns through, lines are open 9-5 during the week and 10-2 Saturdays on 0808 800 6000

The following link will take you to the BCC 'Worried about breast cancer' information page which you may find helpful too:

http://www.breastcancercare.org.uk/worried?utm_source=promo_content&%3Butm_medium=help_you&%3Butm_campaign=worried

Take care

Lucy

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Absolutely terrified, please help

I am very concerned that I have breast cancer, as I found a lump in my breast about two weeks ago but at the time I put it down to my period/hormones, although it can't be that as it's still here now! I should point out that the lump itself is right on the edge of my left breast, near my armpit, is tender and sore especially when I touch it (much like the soreness associated with the menstrual cycle, but seeing as it's lasted such a long time it can't be that) and is irregular in the sense that it feels kind of ropey and knobbly and doesn't have clearly-defined edges (a classic symptom of BC), and it's also squishy and when I touch it; it seems to 'run away' under my finger, if that makes sense? I'm really worried as I'm only eighteen and no-one in my family has had breast cancer so I'd be the first! I know the first thing people will say is fibroadenoma/fibrocystic breast changes but it had not changed with the advent of my period two weeks ago and is still present now. It's Saturday now, and I can't even think about getting a doctor's appointment until Monday and the waiting and uncertainty is killing me...

Please help! xxx