Jusy want to tell you of my sisters experience. She was diagnosed with breast cancer when she was 32. She had chemo and radiotherapy and took tamoxifen for 2 years. It should've been 5 but she wanted to have another child and discussed this with her surgeon. She had an aggressive tumour which had spread to her lymph nodes (2 or 4- she can't remember exactly). She had chemo (not Fec because her hair didn't fall out-this was a while ago). She went on to have a healthy child and is 14 years post treatment. Her cancer has not returned though she did have a mastectomy for dcis. I would be cautious if you have a lot of nodes involved but just wanted to share a positive story with you.
KAM80. What a horrible dilemma! Of course you are focussing on the now and getting better yourself. You are not in the least 'abnormal' for not wanting to contemplate the future, never mind the huge commitment of starting a family.
If your eggs have been frozen, is there a possibility of using them and your husband's sperm in a surrogate mother? I don't even know if this is available in this country, but I'm sure I've heard of it. I'd advise asking your IVF team what all the possibilities are, so you have all the facts, and then having an open, honest, CALM (ie don't wait until you are cross with each other!) conversation with your husband about EXACTLY how you feel about him, your BC, and any possible future family. Make sure he understands just how emotionally challenging geting through BC treatment is. (Perhaps suggest he reads some of the posts on here?)
I can say that as time passes, you will start to feel more back to 'normal', when you have had time to recover from the hideous things that have happened to you with dx and treatment,, so don't rule ANYTHING out yet. You don't know how you'll feel in 12 months time, never mind 5 years!
I wish you and your husband all the best at this difficult time. x