just want to say to you all, be brave, have a laugh, and tick these treatments off whilst having treats for yourself along the way.
I feel psychologicaly soo much better since chemo ended. Im still very tired out at the end of the day, and returning to full time work over the next 6 weeks.
Hold on in there,and thankyou for all your kind words and funny stories along the way,
Im moving around threads now, as starting tamoxifen next month, and having nipple recon later this year, new boob is ok and i even wore a bikini top this week!!!!!!
Good luck and love to you all ,
Well done Thelma - Think you'l be out of there before I arrive!
I'm sure we'll all bump into each other from time to time
lots of love
Hi all, just wanted to share the good news . last FeC today & am now going to bed for a week - very happy!
Love & best wishes to all Will now be switching to the rads page. Thelma xx
Definite agree Zoe - there needs to be a reunion!!
I have my last chemo on 14th May - touch wood, apar from making me feel extremely tired for the first week or so, since they put me back on fec, coupled with neulasta injections - I have been wonderful so I hope the last one is just as good to me!!
Shall keep droppng back to see how everyone is - and looking in on other threads to keep updated....will be moving to the herceptin one myself soon - got appt with onc on 21st May to sort out muga scan. Gawd knows why they picked 21st May - that's 7 days after my last chemo - just as I start to feel like sh*te lol
And I will add my thanks too - back in those early days (which seem like yearsssssssssss ago now) I never thought I would get through the chemo - but all the help and support made it so much easier - I'd have been lost without you all - so a big ty to all of you
Havent written for ages because chemo over. But I have checked out every few days, and so I also would like to say thanks to everyone who supported me too when I found this website for the first time and discovered all these 'sisters' will be talking to everyone on the other threads too I'm sure, but this one deserves a reunion gala event next year!
Lovely to hear from you
Glad you've managed to get the second TAX under your belt - I finally had my first one on Monday
Hope you keep well
lots of love
Just thought I would pop in and say hi to all. Have been rough since 2nd lot of taxotere last week. Feet, hips and back pain again. At least I did not end up at A&E like last time.
My 7th chemo is on 21.5.08 and they did say that may be my last one. I will keeping everything crossed that I can.
I hope everyone is well as can be expected and enjoying the lovely weather.
Looks like this thread could be coming to an end as everyone is coming to the end of their chemo. I would like to say a big thank you to all re your kinds words and help over the last few months. It has been very grateful.
Please keep in touch. You can PM me if you want as I would love to keep in contact with you all.
Love to you all
hope things are going ok for you
my care nurse said the same thing about the connection with my Dad 🙂
hope you enjoyed lunch
will continue to pop in occasionally just in case others pop back! 🙂
my hands arn't too good - have swelling or pins & needles - seeing doc tomorrow & care nurse, think it may be carpel tunnel syndrome kicking in with menopause - oh the joys of M NOT!!!
anyway - love to all.
ps have enjoyed the sun but not the weeds in my garden - hope my son can help out with that today - its like a wilderness!!! have to take extra care in the sun too as seem to react v quickly and get swollen cheeks and skin gets v red!!! have to buy more sun cream....
Hi Jan .... and Rach, Sukes, EL and others ...
Lovely to hear from you Jan
Yes - I agree this thread is on it's way out as many people are finishing
Really pleased to hear that you have finished your pre-surgery treatment - a definite point for celebration!
Sorry about the date - I know how that one feels! Are you sure you've got it right? 🙂 .... On reflection, I think it would be best to think he'll be thinking of you and helping you through it - like a connection.
You have done really well to keep your hair. Like you, I think I'll be down to a quarter by the end - am now at half. Feel normal going out for lunch but hate going out for dinner as feel more consipicuous.
Your onc (s!) must be driving you nuts - there is nothing worse than being not listened to - especially if you are intelligent. That must be very very annoying and frustrating.
On a happier note - do have a lovely holiday - what a treat!!
Hope everything goes well for you with the surgery and the spine mets
Thanks for popping in to say cheerio
lots of love
Hope you ok Fizbix - Tax doesn't sound pleasant and as far as I can tell am not having it although a nurse giving me chemo said I may have it, the onc hasn't mentioned it.
Actually talking of oncs - have had 3 different ones for last 3 chemos and this last did not b*****y listen to me. I told her I wasnt nauseous at all then what did she do - gaily write a prescription for more Dex and the other nausea tablets Domperidone - 3 boxes of that!!! can you believe it - i gave them back to the ward while waiting interminably for my chemo (again) there must be a better system where I go....I have 2 boxes of the Dom still at home untouched and enough DEx too - she didnt listen!!! Asking about other stuff rads etc she said that was a last resort - not very helpful comment really....:( as I have spine mets...
Anyway I have had my last FEC and dont have to go to hospital again until my pre-op and axillary clearance operation June 9 which is the anniversary of my Dads death....
nice to think I dont have to go in again for a few weeks and a wekk holiday in Italy before op....sigh
I still have to have more treatment for my spine mets and will be going to another thread - like others have - this has gone very quiet...not surprising ....as treatment moves on
I cant believe have got through it, in January it seemed a very long time!!! 🙂
However sleep isnt good and hasnt been, up 2/3 times a night and cant get back easily after 2nd trip to loo 😞 last night had really painful sinus pain on right cheek and it burning - its still bright red hot and slightly swollen so am staying home - not sure what it was really , temp was ok - chemo accumulation i guess - strange to look in mirror all right side of face is so red & hot!
Hair is still thinning about quarter left I reckon but its still 5mm lenght and I go out & about with it like is, a cotton fitted scarf of course to protect from sun - may buy a sun hat to protect neck too...when i can get into town..
will talk with someone tued...if not right - will take more paracetemol me thinks
hope you ok Rach & Sukes & others
Hi all (if there's anyone there!!!!!),
Just popped on to say that I'm having my first Tax tomorrow - not as frightening this time - probably becasue I'm not as ill!!!
Good luck tomorrow Sukes
Lots of love
Good to hear from you, I don't know if my hair is growing but I was on the understanding that its suposed to fall out with the tax? Sometimes I think it is and other times i think its still falling out - thats whats left.
Anyhow i'm having my 2nd tax hopefully on tuesday so we should both be experiencing the Tax at the same time. I have got the anti-inflammatory tablets and antibiotics ready for standby for thrush in the mouth. I have been told to take the anti inflamatories on thursday b4 the symptons kick in on friday based on my experience 3 weeks ago.
I'm really pleased today because I finally got the OH to put up my new super king size bed and its great. So comfortable and big so I can get the 3 brats in the bed - and the best is I love my bed sheets. for the first time I really splashed out on bed sheets and I now think it is SO worth it.
Sorry to hear about your head but i just wish the sun would shine here in birmingham. today is supposed to be a lovely day but its NOT! They never get the weather right do they.
Take care and speak to u soon
Me again ... never rains but it pours .... am due for first Tax (again) on Monday so am posting now in case I go wobbly over the weekend..... the way I'm feling my neuts are ok this time ....
Hope that everyone is well.
Welll ... "the butch is back" - yes I have been to the hairdressers - my hair has never grown so fast - a whole inch in 2 months - usually it's less than half that!
The good news is my head is now more balanced looking - the bad news is that you can see through to my scalp on BOTH sides now - before it was only over the left ear side. The bottom at the back is still thick - how helpful is that?
This time the experience in the hairdressers was quite joyous. After the sever prune I said to the hairdresser - well it will only look this bad for a little while (not wanting to be rude about her artwork) - it will either be much longer soon or gone competely after the first TAX!!
I have to say I was annoyed in that I am paying the prices of a woman with a blow dry and have it sprayed and cut dry and leave with it wet and have far less hair (fewer strands and shorter hair) that the chap who was in there with me and he paid half what I did!!!
Amazing - the hair isn't the same but the price is - shame it isn't the other way round!!!
Am having a HUGE problem with the weather. Where I live it is getting very sunny now and it burns my head something rotten - so I can't stand in the sun - or be in the sun. Bit of a problem - after a few minutes it starts to sting. I am worried about covering my head with a wig as it will be bad for the hair I have so I',m trying to stay out the sun all the time. This limits walking unless I live like a vampire!
OH gave me his baseball cap (not the "chelsea" one thank goodness) - I look even more butch in that - although I have to admit totally unrecognisable. so as long as I don;t say a word and go around on my own so no-one recognises me by my OH then everything will be fine!
Hope you are all keeping well and good luck
Lots of love
I laughed out loud about your putting your feet near your OH's nuts!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OMG !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Mine are so cold they'd probably freeze my OH's nuts off!!! I can just imagine if I tried it ... he would say in a sort of strnge voice "what are you doing?" .... and go sort of stiff ... tense not get an erection!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
have to say that when I told him that my feet would go numb with tax he said "does that mean i can touch them now?" ... he;s been trying to get near them for 20 years but I can't STAND anyone touching my feet - ever - my cousins used to tickle them whe i was young and it's put me right off!!
Try not to worry about pains in funny places - I get a strange tightness down by the back of my ribs right across my back when I have my e-coli injections ...
lots of love
I'm so glad your back - your sense of homour is great great great!. you really know how to make a girl laugh. I can't say i'm suffering from cold feet but more so sweaty feet but i like rubbing them in between my OH upper legs near his nuts if you know what I mean so he might just get a rash and suffer a bit!
sarah seabird - I'm glad you've finished your tax - I'm due to have my next one on tuesday so wish me luck - I'm more prepared this time with stronger pain killers and also antiiotics for oral thrush and I so know what u mean about the tongue thing. i felt like a giraffe. How long did your aches and pains go one for its just that I keep getting a dull pain near my chest and I don't know if is musle pain, or what but i keep thinking the worst that the cancer has spread and is in my bones even though i had a bone scan end of feb and it was all clear.
Mags - Sorry to hear about you not continuing with tax but as the onc say they don't want to kill u in the process. - I'm still waiting for my cleaning and gardenin to be done.
Speak to u all soon.
on the temperature front I have been "glowing" at night ...
this may be partly due to a chemo-incuded menopause and partly due to the fac that my feet are FREEZING COLD every night so I go to sleep with a hot water bottle on my feet and wake up with it near my face!!! now explain that one ... unless the cat sits on it (quite often) when it stays where it is (doen the bed) although I sometimes have to request a second one - if he's right on top of it and I'm freezing in which case the second one moves up the bed !!! ...
last time I thought I was having the menopause i had the mother of all periods .... enough said on that .... except to say that I am very lucky i don;t glow much (never have) so whilst I'm waking up feeling quite hot I would never make the bed wet or even slightly damp .... (except for that time I was peeing due to all that coughing) ... soit's not that inconvenient!
On that happy note am off to have another cup of tea! Water intake has gone up a bit if anyone is interested!
Hope everyone keeps very well
Lots of love
Glad the job is going well Jan
Thanks for keeping an eye on us Serene Sarah Seabird
Thanks for making me feel "normal" Magz175 ! After I wrote my last post i thought .... "i wonder whether I have just killed off this thread??? If someone else just wrote what I did - what would I think? That they were some sort of nutter or wierdo... it's all getting hard to believe ... LARGER THAN LIFE!"
...... so relieved you are all still here !!! ..............
Talking about "large" I've put a bit of weight on - not that bothered excpt trousers only just do up and don't fancy buying any more so did more physical work today ...... energetic cleaning not bricklaying !... then slept for 5 hours! .... luckily I only had a snack beforehand ....
Thought the cat was ill so we took him to the vet - embarrasingly it was a fluffball - he had his rabies injection anyway - wan;t impressed - I thought "I know how you feel mate!!"
I felt a bit grotty today so I rang up my vet (the oncology department) and they politely told me that a temperature of 36.5 doesn't really count ..... they probably thought I was a mad foreigner ... but I was worried - espeically after Magz175 saying she'd ignored a slight temperature and look what happened!!!! .... . felt quite not well and then thought "bu**er it - I might as well do some cleaning anyway!" ... am still here (obviously!)
back in a min
Sorry to hear about your uncle Fizbix - hugs
it seems we all coming through - thinking of you Julie
my last chemo is a week Fri...whew! cant believe the time is going so fast now...
This week is amazing my energy levels are fairly good considering, sleep is a pain - i think my boy is used to getting up for the loo twice each night 😞 the 2nd trip often leaves me awake not getting back to sleep.
I am working! and enjoying the sun and warmth - the temp is rising and I dont feel so cold - its great
i am loving the work and worked 7 hrs y'day - and am taking it easier today. In a meeting there were 2 with colds and another brewing an ear infection! so far am ok....
am soo looking forward to a break beg of June and we come home on 7th and my op is 9th - great timing. the op is a bit risky tho as i had a reconstruction 3 yrs ago and that may die if they nick the vein - worst case scenario.
my surgeon said that it was like tying some string to a tree at teh esdge of the forest then going into the middle and out agin with the string! bit scary really when i think about it
will post agin after w/e as got oh fathers 80th with lunch for 21 and a balloon ride for him 🙂
then out with friends on sun - making up for last w/e when did nothing but mope
oh these ups & downs hey....
FizBix - So sorry to hear about your uncle dying.
Just a few words of encouragement girls - I had my last Taxotere two weeks ago today, and I can honestly tell you that I am feeling GOOD! Eyes still watering a lot which is annoying, but aches and pains gone (and they were bad), tongue fits in my mouth again, and wine tastes right again. So weird, at the time you can't imagine ever getting any semblance of feeling normal back again - but you do. Even watched the Olympic torch being lit in Canberra this morning, and that was having been to the hot air balloon festival on Tuesday. Getting up 4.30 am tomorrow to go to the Anzac service - hey, so there is more to life than cancer!!! Loads and loads of love to all of you still going through the chemo - you WILL come out the other end, promise! Sarahxxxxxx
OMG Fizbix - I've had chemo AND a very large drink in the last 24 hous and I understood it all - now what does that say about me lol
So sorry about your uncle - and believe me I have done exactly the same thing with the anniversary of my mums death AND her birthday - got them all wrong this year - and was so so upset and cross with myself.
you won't believe this but .....
do you remember that when my chemo was cancelled last week that I was incredibly worried as it was supposed to be for TODAY which I thought was the anniversary of my dad's death and i got desperately worried
firstly, it was postponed until the 28th due to a full diary
secondly, my dad died 23rd MAY not April - sorry chemo brain - told you i was ill - he was my best friend and hero so how i could have got that wrong i'll never know ....
thirdly, AND VERY WIERDLY, my uncle - his brother - just died today ....(the one that got knocked over on the level crossing in his electric wheel chair 6 weeks ago)
HOW FREAKY IS THAT ???????????????????
anyone who has just had chemo or a drink within the previous 24 hours won't understand a word of this ...
lots of love
Just popped on to say "hi"
sorry Chrissie has been ill
well done Julie for nearly finishing!
Lots of love
Im fast approaching the last chemo!!!!!!!!!!!!! neuts 0.8 today, repeat thursday morning prior to chemo 6 if ok. fingers and everything else crossed.
I feel ok, cosidering Im such a busy bee,OH threatened to put reins on me recently!
We went out ar 4.30am on sat for a 'dawn chorus 'meet in our local woods with otherlike mad minded people, it was a lovely thing to do, having hot porridge and getting back into a warm bed a t 6.00am was much lovelier thing to do tho!!!!!!
Glad to hear some of you are turning past that black corner, it sneaks up and smacks you in the a--e, when you arent looking eh!
Ive been succesful in a critical illness claim- yahooooo, so well chuffed, that will reduce my mortgage considerably ....very chuffed.
Had a chat with oncs today about Tamoxifen etc.... 5 yr plan, I wonder if there is an alternative, or if anyone has said no to it, all depends on the statistics and risk factors doesnt it really.I'll start a thread on this one I think.
Ive abandoned my wig, and sold it on an auction site we all know.Will invest in nice scarves for the summer instead, I was calling it squirrel in the end- not good.
Jan thinking of you during no 6 too, great eh.. everyone else the sunshine IS coming.
LOL Julie xxxx
hello girls, been away a few days and just checking evryone surviving. Had a bad cough for 3 weeks before last chemo, neutrophils right back down to below limit (from back to normal previous time). No-one mentioned the injection, so I just decided to miss the last CMF. Talked to onc about it, and he siad it wasn't a big deal, as I was an 'optional' chemo patient and had 4 epis and 3 cmfs..... just want to move on to rads and back to normal eventually.
Sorry for all you on tax who are havinga terrible time, hope it goes quickly for you, Zoe xxxx
Chrissie - so sorry you have had such a bad time - join the club as they say !
I too have a long list for onc - my next one is this wednesday and as far as I understand it they are reducing the dose as they are of the opinion that the first was too strong for me - given that it stripped the skin from my feet and saw me in hosp for 4 days ! Just been to have bloods done ready for next one - the amount of IV antbiotics pumped into me in hosp, and the oral antibiotics I have been taking sinc I came out should I assume ensure that bloods are ok.
Stopping the chemo isn't an option for me at the moment - though it's just a mopping up exercise.
I hope you get on ok with onc at your next appt
Have been having a bad time of it since 1st taxotere. Ended up in A&E last Tuesday after my GP sent me there to have bloods done.
Had sickness and upset stomach along with pain from the neck down, could hardly walk. My gp thought it was a virus but was not 100% sure and wanted my bloods checked. Everything came back ok and was sent home. I have a long list of problems to tell my oncologist when I go back. Hopefully they stop the next chemo. My lump is smaller enough to take out now.
I am also on the "Taxatore here I come ...." thread and will post this there also and it is very interesting that both myself and Sukes have gone through a "dark patch" at a time when our neutrofils (spent incorrectly!) were very low - hers worse than mine
But I do think that if anyone is feeling really really awful in a very different way then it's time to get your blood checked as you might be ill - or about to be ill if you don't do something about it
not wanting to alarm anyone
love FizBix xxxxx with an e-coli induced sweat but still improving
Can't believe you've only got one to go now Thelma - you'll be joining SSS soon! What's even more amazing is that you've managed to evade TAX
good luck with your surgeon's apointment on Tuesday Jan
good luck to everyone else
going to see what's been happening on Magz's Tax thread now ...
lots of love
Hi to everyone!!
Thanks very much for your prayers Ann
Jan - I had to laugh out loud re: your burping ... I though you were going to say that the difference was that ordinary burping wasn't allowed but chemo burping was !!!! and he just couldn't get it and was giving you black looks or something!!!
Well thelma - you and Serene Sarah Seabird do have a point re: the acounts and as I was getting nowhere slow I decided (prompted by SSS's first comment to just not do them) to ring the accountant yesterday morning and we agreed I'd leave half the things out and put them in next time !! What an emotional boost that was - I have now done them (or not done them - depending on how you look at it) !! Next time them will be due between Tax 3 and 4 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! so I migt as well keep going - but under less presure. Have the feeling the acounts are going to look like a colander until after radio therapy!
Things are definitely less dark here - I have found a match as it were - for illuminacion rather than arsen!
I can honestly say that since being dx last Nov I have not felt really ill. The op was fine, the chemo gave me awful headaches and made me sick but deep down I felt ok. Just the normal me but with a medical complaint. But the last week or so I have felt really not well at all - in fact I have felt deep down ill. Have now turned a corner and feel better since the recent e-coli invasion.
In fact, I am beginning to wonder if my sub-consious knew that my neuts were only 0.7 before the onc did and was trying to put me off going!!!
Today I was happy to get dressed (it's been a huge struggle for the last few days) and took the accounts to the accountant but am now going to do b***er all and watch TV in between dozing.
back in a min
Sorry not posted for a while, been busy with work & stuff. Had FEC 5 of 6 yesterday so probably won't post for a while again if previous events are anything to go by! It was touch & go whether they'd go ahead because my kidney function not as good as it has been (probably too much red wine) so they say they may reduce the dose for the last one if there is no improvement (yippee!!).
Sorry to hear so many of you have been in the wars and reading all the woes that come with TAX, I think i'm glad i'm not having it! But stay positive girls,i'm sure things can only get better & it'll be worth it in the end.
Mags your comments on rads have reassured me, & although the 2 hour round trip is going to be a nuisance, hopefully my treatment will go as smoothly as yours.
Fizbix, can't you just get somebody in to do your accounts? I can't even manage to take my tablets at the right time or day so the thought of accounting leaves me cold.
Talking of cold, night sweats seem to be a common problem amongst us all & its disturbing my sleep quite badly,although it doesn't happen during the day. Is this a treatment side-effect or is it menopause?
All for now, off to Tesco on line shopping to save OH a job tomorrow (I'm so thoughtfull).
Take care everybody & may all your neuts be high>
Hi to all - Chrissie, Zoe, Lyn, Magz, Rach, Julie, Paula & Sarah et al (course some have completed treatment and gone else where) 🙂
glad you turned a corner Fizbix
it feels like \i have too as feel brighter this morning altho not sleeping that well still and legs still ache...
i emailed a few the other day telling that i felt so tired and achy etc and my brother wrote back - we feel a bit like you - and carried on about being busy at work etc
he doenst feel a bit like me!!! its so annoying when peeps say that - it is such a different feel
i am trying to help my oh understand that burping with chemo is different from ordinary food burping - that is so satisfying, with chemo burps its annoying and dissatisfying...
think FB you had a private message or its on another thread....
i sat in the sun with a coat & hat on y'day just to feel the sun on my face and make me feel better - was cold tho ... get cold quickly and yearning for the warmer weather
thanks ann for your message
love to all and hope you all have an enjoyable w/e
me - I hope to visit friends and see family sunday but the weather is to be awful! 😞
will let you know how get on with surgeons on tuesday - date for op I hope and other stuff
my oh brother in law has bowel cancer and has appt with his surgeon same day but at each end of hosp so wont bump into each other....so much cancer around it seems....
Fizbix and Jan,
Have just read your last postings. Will pray for you both tonight.
Hope you sleep well and resist the dark thoughts. When we are tired we are very susceptible to them, but it's hard to fix your mind on positive things, I understand. I'm a newbie to the chemo so have got all this to come, I suppose.
One thing I was grateful for when I woke up one morning a few days ago, was the fact that we are not living in a country which is at war. We can lay down in our beds to sleep in safety! I can't imagine how horrendous it must be for some folk.I try to count my blessings, especially that we have the NHS and these drugs, and new ones on the way probably, for 5 or 10 years down the line, if we need them. It's what works for me, but I know we're all different. It's always good to have a good cry inbetween times!
Love and hugs to you both,
Thanks Bobbie and everyone else
Just came on to say that although i have been feeling really grotty and wiped out I seem to have turned a corner in the last 4 hours and my body has perked up a bit - whooppeee
just off to bed though
by the way - I am confused ... the baove messgae says "xxxx to you 12 hours ago Whisper back" is that one of those private messages ???????? or is it something else ... anyway thanks for letting me know
Hi all - just a quick posting
Sarah & Zoe - good luck with the rads both of you - if my experience was anything to go by, a far, far better experience than the chemo !
Fizbix & Jan - so sorry you are both having a bad time at the moment. What can I say? It will pass, I think we all know that - just doesn't seem like it at the time, but you WILL get there - big hugs to both of you (((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))
I'm feeling relatively well at the moment - still can't feel my feet, and my hands itch like crazy - and I'm about to lose my little toenail !! Haven't heard from onc whether they are planning to reduce the dose for next one - will have to ring because if they are I'm not sure if the steroids beforehand will be the same so I'll have to check.
Anyway - had a dreadful nights sleep, so now I've got the youngest one off to school I'm gong back to bed for a few hours !
take care all
lots of cyber hugs to Magz, Fizbix, Sarah and others
have been feeling really down this week ...after chemo 5 - was told by care nurse y'day that this can be a dark time but by w/e should be coming out of it... well I will wait and see....
my legs ache, not felt so tired, not enough sleep, sleep is light. i look in the mirror and see a ghost of myself.....
but hey its sunny again
am on pamidronate, a bone strengthener for secondaries on my spine and was told y'day that it could carry on for a year - going into hops having a canular sitting for an hour with a drip - has to better than chemo tho
keep wanting to cry but not in front of family - how stupid is that! went for a v slow walk on monday and found a friend in and cried there
oh is working hard - out 5.30am-7.30pm - Sarah sorry it worse for you...
Fizbix, like you in a dark place and thinking dark things - like how long have i got, will i be free of this, cant see that happening...have i the energy to do the things i want to do....NO
not working at all this week
will log in later...
Hi Everyone - Oh dear FizBix, it's just awful when you get psyched up for the next treatment, and then it doesn't happen. Laughter is meant to be good for the neutrophils as well, so put some funny DVDs on the list. You will get through all this - sorry that you have the added burden of the anniversary of your dad's death. Please please put yourself before the Bbbbbb accounts, you really do need a lot of rest right now. Each time you go for chemo your body is never quite back to where it was the time before, so the fatique is cummulative and you need lots and lots of r est and TLC.
Zoe - So glad that the breast scare turned out to be nothing. Horrid at the time though.
and Margaret - Just been reading all your good advice. Though I must say that I shivered and shook almost continually for about a week after the taxotere. Night time is the worst. I go to bed with woolly hat and hot water bottle then have to whip them off/out like a pressure cooker. Then sweat so much that the bed is soaking wet and have to get up for the other half of the night. It really is dreadful to have your body temperature control so shot to pieces. Hopefully easing off now.
So glad that OH has been looking after you properly I bet he is worried sick about you actually. Love to all of you - I'll let you know how the radiotherapy planning goes tomorrow. Sarah xx ps I wore coloured nail varnish on toes and fingers throughout and so far nails seem OK.
it's all a bit difficult this isn't it????
think I feel a bit low as my body is trying to make me slow down so it has a chnace to recover
but also not convinced that all tiredness is due to physical symtoms and some may be due to getting ppppp'd off about the bbbbb acounts
anyway - enough of me
really glad to hear Magz's OH is doing all the ironing - what a morale booster!!!!
really pleased that Zoe is nearly at the end - best of luck - sorry about your scare - must have been horrid!
glad that you are on the final downhill run now SSS- lucky you - well done!!! - really want to get there - shame have to go through Tax first!!
must go now - back off to bed again!
lots of love
have been feeling very low lately and having real trouble doing the acounts - it's been taking me ages to decide that 2 and 2 equals 6.6 so i did have a secret hope that my neuts would be bad (how crazy is that????)
my neuts are at half the minimum level - so the doctor said that i should come back next Wednesday
.... the anniversary of my father's death !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHH....
so I thought - blimey - I was right - I've only got a week left!!!!!
... then I was OVEJOYED to find they are all booked up next week so I have to wait for the following Monday for it
... the omens have improved .....
back on the e-coli again
have decided to do it in the afternoon this time - have lovely flu-like symptoms now
so have to go through it all again
onc has stopped saying "you still have hair" .... I think that's becasue it would be rude to say "you've still got hair but I can see your scalp so don't worry it is falling out!"
made a list of things to do to improve the situation ... based on no evidence of any kind!!!
- drink more water
- drink less tea/ coffee
- do more exercise
- eat more fruit and veg (thanks Zoe - will do this one)
- have actimel (will now delete)
then I came home drank loads of tea and fell asleep!!!!!!!
back in a min again
Hi Zoe Margaret, Serene Sarah Seabird and everyone else,
*** WARNING - an element of BLACK COMEDY in this post ***
slept very well but when i woke up this morning i was ice-old scared
outwardly appeared very normal and inside I just felt resigned to my fate
I was terrified but you would never have known it - i was very concerend about anaphelactic shock (or whatever it's called) and really thought there was a significant chance my tongue would swell up and I would die so ....
I said "goodbye" to the cat - just in case I didn't come back
was desperate for OH to come in with me but he had a crisis so he dropped me off - I didn't say goodbye to him in case he had an accident worrying about me
back in a min - so I don't lose it all
FizBiz - dont waste your money on actimel, we did a big experiment on a variety of those 'good gut bug' products and found some had virtually no bacteria in at all!!!! Better with prebiotic diet really, stuff like veggies, onions, leeks, sweet potatoes. They ara all food that good bacteria like and they will dominate your gut flora again with luck!
Had a 'found a lump in the other breast' panic this morning. Gloomy black thoughts, told nobody. Went to hospital, nothing there of course...huge sigh of relief.
Sorry to hear how the girls on taxotere are suffering, my last chemo tomorrow, then radiation, back to work May 7th I hope!
Love to all, Zoe xx
Sarah - so lovely to hear from you - saw your reply on my other post too thanks. I'mpretty certain they are going to reduce my next dose of tax - my dischargepapers from stay in hospital show that the attending consultant has recommended this to the oncologist, based on the neutropenic sepsis and the neuralgia in my feet. But I have to say I am still terrified lol. I made the (stupid) mistake of looking up the term neutropenic sepsis on the internet (on valid sites) - and OMG when you see it written down it's quite frightening! I just know that with the next one I will be at my GP every 5 mis with every symptom lol. On the upside - my OH was a star - he was really worried, and as I had a slight breakdown and got quite upset the day before I was ill (and called him everything under the sun for not understanding etc etc etc) - he coped with everything at home - dealing with the 10 yr old and her upset, did 4 loads of washing AND ironed it all !! bought me tons of goodies in hospital etc - so maybe he's listened now lol
I will prob have the Neulasta injections now - but having said that, my BN gave me one the day before I was ill (based on low count then) - and having read up on it, I think it was that that caused the atrocious pain that i got in my lower back? have you ever had problems with it Sarah?
I hope everything goes ok with your rads - have to say the rads have been the best part of this dreadful journey for me - no real discomfort, just tiredness - my skin is peeling now, but nothing worse than mild sunburn. I was told not to use any creams etc at all during the treatment, and that they would monitor my skin (which they did). They just gave me aquaeous cream to use at the end and I'm still using it now 4 weeks later.
To everyone else - hope you are all well and coping with the various stages of treatment - Fizbix - best of luck again with the tax
take care all
I'm just resurfacing after lying low for a few days after my final Taxotere. Margaret, I am SO sorry that you were so terribly poorly and taken into hospital, hopefully OH was duly attentive! The foot thing sounds horrid. Now it has settled a bit, you might like to try what I have done which is covering my feet every night with a certain Norwegian foot cream (same as the hand cream) and it seems to have helped a lot.
If it is the slightest comfort, I think my first taxotere was the most painful of the three, so I do hope there will be less difficult times ahead of you. Someone asked about my "fluff". It started growing after the last FEC, about an inch long in places (definitely fluff, not hair), but now have a bald bit at the back of my head like a baby! Losing it could be a side effect of the Neulasta according to the patient info. The mouth thing (swollen tongue and yucky coated feeling) has not been nice, I have found that salad with balsamic vinegar salad dressing has cut right through it though and was actually a help!!)
Still very stiff and aching, but did go out to a book club today and so feel the worse is hopefully behind me. Marking up for RADs on Friday, just realised (he did tell me before) that OH will be in China for the first four weeks of my treatment! Oh well!
Chrissie, Lyn and Jan and everyone else,- good luck and
FixBiz the very best of luck with your first Taxotere. I can honestly say that for me it was a less awful feeling than the FEC and hopefully it will be that way for you as well. Thinking of all you brave and wonderful ladies with the biggest of hugs. Sarah xx
Fizbix - good luck for tomorrow - hope all goes well for you -my next one is next wednesday- and boy am I looking forward to that NOT !!!!
hi Magz175, Chrissie and everone else
having a funny time of it at the moment as TOMORROW is big day - first TAX !!! AAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH!!!!
can honestly say I'm not looking forward to it AT ALL but at least I'm marginally less scared then before i started chemo all together - it's a weeny margin though
jus can;t think straight at all
hope I'm not ging to feel sick as I've still got to finish the B****y accounts
off to bed
in 9 hours i'll have had my blood test and with any luck in 10 hours i'll be coming home as my neutrophils will be a bit too low ....
by the way - somone told me to try actimel - no idea whether it;s good or not but aparently helps with getting the poos back to normal (excuse me please!!!!) ... or as they so quaintly put it "it helps clean the stomach" .....that does sound so much better than "it helps clear the bowels" doesn't it ?????? we've got enough domestos flying round us to clean anything ... just as well we're germ free as we wouldn't hold up too well to an attack!!!
that's it for now - I know i should be grateful and all that but I'm really quite concerened ....in fact if there a lot of "movemen" tomorrow it will be hard to tell if its nerves, actimel or Tax !!!!!!!!!!!!!
fed up with brain not working properly ... that is pppping me off more than anything else ....
lots of love
Hi all - but specifially Chrissie - just to say that I had the feet thing too (details on the ' taxotere here I come' thread). It has passed now, but I dont know if that's because of all the anti-biotics I've had in hospital. The pain has gone, but my skin has now dried up on my heels and the arch of my foot and is peeling off in big strips!
I hope you are feeling better now - if it's any consolation, I was exactly the same as you - had decided I couldn't do tax, it just wasn't worth the pain. It does however have a significant impact on my prognosis so if I could carry on I desperately wanted to. As you will see on the other thread I've just spent the last few days in hospital - as a result they are probably going to reduce dosage of my next chemo - this may be an option to consider if the side effects are too bad for you? My original dose was 168mgs.
about to drop off so please excse the typos and if it's in a bit of a mess
lovely to hear all the news
Rachy - best not to get too het up about your hair - it may not fall out for a long time - havng said that you'll probably have to get it cut v short so don't get too excited about keeping it either- best thing to do is have whatever contingnecy you have chosen at the ready and play it a day at a time
HAVING SAID THAT - I am still with 50% of mine and am desperate to know if it will fall out now i'm about to start TAX - so I have just asked the other thread - but deep down i know that whatever they say it may not happen to me - good or bad!!!
on a less good day i think that some poor person who is inspecting my scalp (through my barnet!) is gong to get a right mouthful as it were - at the moment it doesn't bother me but i can see that it could get that way! ... if anyone can think of anything witty or just plain rude please let me know!!
Sorry you are in so much pain Chrissie - from what I can gather it will pass - nothing wrong with crying - better out than in- I'm joining you on Wednesday - neutrophils permitting. You have been so brave as well as you've somehow managed not to take a day off during the whole of FEC which quite frankly must have been a world record!!!
i think as Julie said we're all getting a bit pooped with all these chemicals and they seem to have saved the best till last as it were - what with mixed-up brains and tired bodies - I feel like I've only got 3 hours every morning by the time i've got ready and then I have to kip after lunch so there's hardly any time for anything!
I seem to be keeping "cat hours" - he's noticed and keeps curling up near me! he must think i've finally learned how to sleep properly!
I'll be off for now
best foot forward and all that
I'm going to ask my onc for the cost of things on Wednesday - I'll let you know
keep as well as possible in your respectove circumstances
lts of love
Sorry i have not been on for a few days.Had my 1st tax on wednesday. It went ok until about 5pm that night when I started to feel very tired. Could not go to work thursday and friday (1st days sick since dx) Had a bright red face on thursday. My mum said I looked like i had been drinking all night. Wish i had.
I am now in alot of pain with my feet and have been since friday lunchtime. Has anyone else experience that or anything else and how long does it last. Very painful and can hardly walk. Painkillers not helping much. Will ring chemo ward 2moro if still in pain. Temp is ok. Went up to 37.4 which is the worse it has been.
When i go back i might ask them to stop the tax because I cant take this pain. I was getting myself upset over it, crying while my OH slept. I know i should have woke him up to comfort me.
Good luck seabird and everyone else. I wish i could remember everyone (chemo mashed brain wont let me) but you know i love you all.