Hello Rach , know exactly where you're coming from as I'm sure everybody else here does . Its true that its hard not being in control and having no say really in things . Its the roller coaster moment where one day life was " normal " and now suddenly you're plunged into an alien , frightening world . One of my big C friends says she thinks of it as a road , and each down moment is a speed bump ..." a pest to contend with, to get over with quickly, and not keep you back from reaching where you want to be ! " Yes life has changed and its a high price to pay , but we all come out of this with a new take on life that others don't find . The world is brighter sweeter and you will live it to the full . " The only thing we have to fear is fear itself . You , we , will get through this ! X ps ...speaking personally i think you can't beat doggie cuddles and hell with it , buy a thong !
If I am Brutally honest, today has not been one of my better days. I think two weeks of Emotions and exhaustion took over. Managed to get through a three hour finance meeting, but one word with a colleague who lost her 16 year old son to cancer last year, opened the flood gates. Decided home, pjs and cuddles with the dog were in order. Have now had a sleep and feel much more in control again. I hate this no mans land, out of control feeling, not a good place for me. Once I know the course of treatment, I can don my big girl pants and face it all. Xxx